Novacane
by romeothewriter
Summary: What happens when you mix a Berkeley dental student and a struggling DJ in the summer heat of Indio, California during the Coachella Music Festival? Based on the song "Novacane" by Frank Ocean I contributed on. First songfic. Something to hold us over while Im out on hiatus lol. RATED M FOR VERY MATURE. Seriously
1. Auto-Tune

**_A/N: So I've had this in my brain for a while now. WARNING: Rated M for just about everything involved. Sex, Drugs and Rock N Roll. Oh and hip hop too lol. After stepping back into the musical realm and starting to work with Frank Ocean, I really was sparked by this song. It was his first big hit as a solo artist, and I love it, so I decided I would fit this into my job right? It's a win-win. I'm sure this won't be for everyone, but this is only the beginning. it wont be so M rated through the whole thing. Just the beginning. Therefore, we'll see what happens, but I hope you guys can bare with me and enjoy it. Once I have more time in the work schedule Ill work on the third installment to Rebel with a Voice, but that takes a lot more planning since it has a specific story line to follow and such. This is fresh, and I needed something fun to hold me over. So please enjoy! My first song fic._**

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"B, you just need a break, I swear," the tall blonde assured her over and over again.

"A break?" Beca shot back. "Bree, Ms. Dean is going to fire me any day now. I haven't cranked out a hit in months, and the music just gets flatter and flatter."

"Well, maybe you could get in touch with your emotions if you would stop getting high!"

"Oh, come on. It's the only thing that keeps me functioning. That's not it."

Aubrey huffed, frustration evident in her slumped posture and lazy emerald eyes. She knew what the problem was, but she had no idea how to exactly fix it. The great DJ had come to a break in the path to success. With the move to LA came the introduction to drugs, and Aubrey was only glad that speed or coke had not been the poison of choice for her half-sister. With their mother gone and her stepfather locked away, it had been all up to the three siblings to stay afloat. Aubrey had concurred with Beca's idea of going to LA to make it big in music just as the blonde had finished her degree at Barden University back in Georgia. She had taken to trying her best to be there for the twins as they grew up. Their mother had become sick when Aubrey was fifteen, the twins eleven, and it had summoned a slew of hardship upon the family. When Warren went to prison for drug trafficking, she was thirteen, and even then, she had to be a rock for her family. She had fought to make sure that badass rebel-without-a-cause Beca didn't fall to the same life that the brunette's father had. Her and her mother introduced the rebel to music, and it had helped ease the pain. She became spectacular at mixing songs, and soon, with their mother's help, she had discovered her voice and rhythm. Still, Aubrey, had much more to worry about. She had worked in a diner for the better part of high school to help out, and Aubrey had to grow up much faster than any other teens in their town. Now, watching her sister struggle mercilessly was tearing her apart, but she had to keep it together for the both of them. She had never cried when tragedy struck. She would only empty her stomach before throwing on a tight-lipped smile and a firm look. It was the strength for her two younger siblings, and she planned to keep it that way. She now flashed Beca that stern look, but seeing the tiny DJ's resigned state as she sprawled out in the armchair with sullen eyes softened the blonde's features instantly. She sighed in defeat once more, her arms falling limp at her sides.

"Look, what you need to do is get back to your roots. I'm not here as your manager or lawyer right now. I'm here as your sister, your best friend. We've been through hell together, Becs, and I'm not giving up on you because I know that you can overcome this. We always do. You're not any less talented than you were four years ago. You're older and wiser now. You just need to get back in touch with the music."

Beca huffed out a disgruntled breath, dragging her hands down her face. "Okay, so...what do you suggest I do, Bree?"

"Well, Jesse's going to that big festival this weekend."

"You want me to go to Coachella?"

"Well, actually, Jay-Z wanted you to do a live cut of the songs you produced for him."

"What!? When were you gonna tell me!"

"Well, he only called last night, and he wanted a more live feel than just a sing-along. It's gonna be a huge event. Big names are coming in from all over the industry. You and Jay have the third and final night both weeks."

"So he wanted both weeks?"

"Yeah. He said if you couldn't make it this weekend, he would have you next weekend, but I think it's best to do both."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"I'm always right."

Beca snorted. "Of course you are."

"Z-Trip's gonna be there too. He's been the talk of town, and showing up with the likes of him will definitely boost you."

"Okay, are you coming with?"

"I have to try and negotiate, hold onto the contract for Pink and Ne-Yo, but I'll see you when you get back."

"Okay."

"Now, go home. Get some rest. Jesse said you'll leave Thursday night. The set's Saturday night, and I'll call and let Jay-Z's people know you'll be there."

"Okay." The brunette stood now, slinging her laptop bag over her shoulder and approaching the blonde. She planted a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Thanks, Bree, for sticking with me."

"Hey, we're family always before anything else, and we're gonna get back out there. This will give you the feel of it again, and you can get high all you want there. I know a handful of people that would love to light up with DJ Titanium B."

Beca snorted. "Maybe they should pass you one too, loosen up a bit."

"Uh, no thanks."

"Come on. The whole nervous vomiting thing _must _get old."

"When I get stressed, I listen to-"

"Ugh, do NOT say Ace of Base. Horrid."

"What? It's classic."

"Right. Okay, I'll call you tomorrow."

"Okay. Just have fun, baby sister. Let loose."

"I plan to."

"Well not too loose."

"You underestimate me, Posen."

"You underestimate yourself."

They shared a genuine grin, a rarity in their lives. "I love you, Blondie."

"I love you too, Brownie, now get out of here. Give JJ a kiss for me."

"Ew, I am not kissing Jesse."

She chuckled. "Tell him I said to keep you safe."

"Will do."

Beca sidled out of the conference room in the back of Bella Studios, bidding Lily, the receptionist, a good night. As she entered the main lobby, their label CEO, Cynthia Rose, stood there. She was a small but bulky woman with pink-streaked hair, half her head shaved. She had chocolate skin and bright brown eyes. Her smile was that of a Colgate commercial girl, but she was tough. She ran the label with an iron fist, and she had given Beca a chance when no one else would during her first year in LA shortly after reaching the age of eighteen. Beca had been an amazing artist to start with, but the demand of the industry had severely jaded her. The auto-tune and puppetry of the business had put the DJ and producer off. She was used by the biggest names in the industry to create a mainstream sound, a sound that was all the same pulsing from the radio. In that, they had worn Beca out, and her passion for music had slowly declined before disintegrating almost completely. Now, she couldn't even find her creative prowess anymore. She was stuck on stupid if you will, and she had yet to construct another chart-topping hit. It had been a year, and Beca Mitchell was numb to the music. Some said it was all of the weed that she inhaled daily, but she knew better. It was the music she was forced to make. It was not her own, and though Cynthia Rose tried her very best to keep it all Beca, the artists that hired her, paid her, had other ideas. Hopefully, this free spirited music festival would help her find herself again. Then she could go back to making music and actually enjoying it.

"Hey, B," the CEO greeted with a tentative smile.

"Hey, CR," Beca returned, lofting a hand in greeting.

"How are you feeling?"

"The usual."

"You're doing the gig with Jigga this weekend, right?"

"Yeah, J and I are taking off for Indio Thursday night."

"Hey, enjoy the scene, B. It's a great festival. I know how you're feelin'. I know you feel like a puppet in this industry, but let's just make a few more moves, and we can get back to doing us. Luke called yesterday. He found a few new artists to sign personally to the label, so you'll have full reign over them. We can get you back on the mic-"

"Naw, CR. You know I'm not going back."

"Come on, B. It's how I found you. Who knew that Kimmy Jin's little alt white girl roommate she got stuck with could rhyme _and _sing?"

The two chuckled at the remembrance. Kimmy Jin, Lily's good friend, had just moved into an apartment near UCLA, and she had been all good with it until she found out that the lease was for quadruple the monthly payment she had been initially told. Unable to back out, she had sought out a few roommates, and Beca, Aubrey and Jesse had just hauled into the city. With their initial plan of finding a place close to where the magic happened failed miserably and Jesse not too keen on living in the UCLA dorms while his sisters were not, they had chosen the spot offered on Craigslist by KJ. Though the Korean never talked to them or interacted with them at all at first, Kimmy found the music pumping through the walls at random intervals intriguing. She had called up Lily, who had been stressing over finding talent with Luke, the actual talent manager, straightway. CR had then made the trip over herself with the tall, blonde Brit in tow to check it out. She had been moved by the mixes, but what she had become enchanted with was Beca's smooth hip-hop flow and solid vocals. Still, Beca could not go back for her heart would not allow her to do so.

"Yeah, but I-" Beca began after sobering, but CR went on.

"B, I know it's hard. Losing your mom is never an easy thing, and I know she helped you find the music, but the last thing that woman would want you to do is waste away your talent. I was seventeen when I lost my mom. Five years after that, I opened up this place, and look at us. We're growing, slowly but surely and everyday, I thank her for giving me that strength. I know she would want me to persevere. It was her dream for me, and your mother's dream for you was to do what makes you happy. You're not happy, kid, but I haven't let you go because I know the talent you hold in your heart. It's still there, and it's worth a listen."

"I just-I don't know. I mean, I know I owe you my best, but-I just don't know how to get back to it, you know. I mean, I can't say I don't miss it, but..."

"Look, just, see how it feels rockin' with Jigga, a'ight, and we'll see how it goes from here."

"Alright. Night."

"Night, kid."

CR patted her shoulder as she moved towards the door, stepping into the muggy LA summer night. She took the joint snugly resting behind her ear and lit it, looking out over the city from their hilltop location. LA. It had always been Beca's dream to move there and become a powerhouse in the music industry. She had been so close, but she burned out so quickly that it was hard to decipher when the dream actually died or if it ever began at all. Still, she was pushing herself to her limits just to stay relevant, but she had been drifting off of the radar for a long time now. She didn't want to be that artist. She didn't want to watch the story end at twenty-two, and she only hoped she could find a way to break from the year-long case of writer's block.

Beca arrived at her loft just north of Hollywood Boulevard on another looming hill as the night reached its midpoint. The blue Corvette in the driveway told her she had company, and she wasn't all that surprised. They had moved out of the apartment with Kimmy Jin after a year when the lease was up, and now, she lived in her own loft with Jesse, who was still trying to get his break scoring movies in the big city, but even with him out more often than not, it was never lonely. She smirked when she saw the car parked comfortably in her drive, pulling her sleek, cobalt Dodge Charger up beside it. Jesse's jeep was nowhere to be found. She flicked the ashes from her joint haphazardly out the window before opening the door and stepping out. She tossed the roach into the tin can near the door and let herself inside. Disposing of her bag in her home office and studio, she made her way up the stairs slowly. The sight that greeted her in her bedroom caused her lips to subconsciously curl upwards as she raked it in. The only person aside from her brother and sister that would ever carelessly enter her home in her absence lay there clad in a silky, black nightgown, see through, and Beca knew it was Victoria's Secret's newest product. The leggy brunette smiled coyly at the homeowner, her finger at her lips. Her long, tanned legs lay slightly bent, and her long, chocolate locks were splayed out arbitrarily across the satin red pillowcase. Beca wet her lips with the tip of her tongue, eyes darkening several shades. The Secret angel always came over to show off their freshest attire to Beca first and foremost, knowing the smaller brunette would appreciate each piece. Right before she ripped it off.

"Fancy seeing you here," Stacie husked.

"It's a small world after all," Beca returned, her voice octaves lower than usual.

"What's a fine DJ like you doing in a place like this?"

Beca sat beside her on the bed, leaning over so that her lips brushed the shell of her ear as her hand trailed up the woman's thigh, feeling the soft fabric running over the back of her palm. Her fingers halted at the small strip of fabric that constitutes as the waistband of Stacie's g-string before sliding down her palm to cup the full swell of her ass. Her chest threatened to burst forth from the garment, teasing mercilessly. Stacie flashed that Hollywood smile that would usually cloud Beca's mind beyond logical thought.

"Trying to find out Vicky's secret," she breathed.

"I think I can help you with that."

It was the same as it had been for the past several months. Stacie would mount the small DJ, grinding their centers together as she moaned deeply, and aside from the occasional grunt, the DJ was quiet, distant. Her eyes were fixed on the high ceiling above, portraying no emotion whatsoever. It had been that way for a time now. It may have been the marijuana in her system, but Beca knew better. Sex had become just like music. It was auto-tuned, computed emotion, and Beca didn't have the luxury of depending on Viagra or any other pill to intensify intimacy. Stacie would usually leave right after their they finished up, only knowing that Beca had reached her climax with the deep grunt that escaped her lips as she bit down on the bottom one, her eyes shut tight, and the model always came back weeks later hoping it would be different. She had known the DJ for three years though, and she knew she was in a funk. Tonight, she lay beside her, catching her breath as she propped her head on her hand.

"What's going on with you, B?" she sighed, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Beca's ear.

"Huh?" Beca replied, eyes shut softly.

"I mean, I used to turn you into an animal." She chuckled softly now.

"It isn't you, Stace. I swear. I mean, look at you. It's definitely not you. It's just, I don't know, I don't feel anything anymore. It all feels forced, and-ugh. I have no idea. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, DJ. I understand you're in a funk, and I just wanna help you out."

Beca laughed bitterly. "Why me, Stace? You have dudes lining up at your door."

"Because, you intrigued me from the start, and I'm not saying I'm in love or anything, but I always felt that pull to you. You just need to get back to the basics. Be you. Stop being one of these Hollywood sellouts. Your old mixes are phenomenal, and your raps are still my lady jams to this day, so you just have to go back to that."

Beca sighed, resorting to her usual closed off and distant self. She had known Stacie a long time, but she wasn't in a zone comfortable enough to spill out her deepest fears and darkest secrets to the Victoria's Secret angel. Cynthia Rose and her siblings were the only ones that knew her story. When cancer took her mother a year after she moved to LA, only those three people knew the entire tale. Of course, media outlets had found leaks about it, but they didn't know about the internal struggle Beca had endured in the aftermath. They didn't understand how big of an impact her mother's death had on her life, her music, her ability to be happy. That blended with the ridiculous demands of today's Top 40 artists and the aspirational endeavors of said artists versus the foundational inspirational aspect that had made music so enticing to start with had concocted the numb and passive Beca Mitchell in contrast to the challenging and lively Beca Mitchell of a time passed. No one understood how bad she wanted to break the spell, to escape confines of her own mind, but she had yet to discover the solution. She could only hope the weekend helped in any way possible to free her from the chains that currently bound her.

Stacie stayed until the early morning, arm thrown thoughtlessly across the DJ's midsection. She awoke before the sun, gathering her clothes and stepping out of the room. She could hear the ending of _The Breakfast Club_ resonating down the hall from Jesse's room, and she smirked as she descended the stairs. One day, she would not be the only one vying for time inside the realm of Beca Mitchell. The model believed in the small artist, and one day, she would be great again. Stacie could only contribute a warm bed and body now, but she would do anything she could to rebuild the confidence the small DJ had once been known for.

"Yeah, but who would be easier to sleep with? Captain America or a great white shark?" Jesse quipped as he poured two mugs of coffee.

"I'm gonna go with...a great white shark," Beca replied, taking the offered mug.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"It isn't like either of us would sleep with Captain America anyway. Unless...you switched teams while I was sleeping." She smirked at his guffaw.

"No, still representing the same team."

"Then it would be an easy choice."

"Hey, are you all packed?"

"Yeah, we're taking Kiera, right?"

He snorted. "Yeah. I can't believe you named your car."

"Hey, Kiera is a sexy name."

"And a sexy actress."

"I wouldn't know."

"You know, movie's have a way to make you-"

She lolled her head back with a huff. "Don't start, J. Please, don't start."

"Fine. You just watch though. If you won't allow movies to free your mind from reality for a little while, this festival is gonna inspire the living hell out of you. I mean, you haven't spun live in a long time, and now you're on with Jigga? Fire."

"I'm hoping it does the soul good, ya know? It's been a minute since I've heard some good music too. Way too long. If I have to hear another Miley Cyrus song, I'm gonna rip my ears off."

"Hey, she paid for this loft here, remember?"

"I'd rather live in a box than hand over those hits I created to her. She goes from Hannah Montana to Madonna in a few years, and all of a sudden half dressed and twerking is inspirational? It's like Justin Bieber hitting a bong. Please, dude. I found my own way to the bud. I didn't need some little kid wet behind the ears to provoke me."

Jesse smirked. "I wasn't aware you felt so strongly about teenage superstars."

She closed one eye as if wincing or winking, clicking her tongue and aiming a firearm-like finger at her twin brother. "See, that's the thing. I'm not phased one bit, but they assume that I am. Or that I should be."

"Well, you did sort of blow off Miley at that screening of Spring Breakers."

"Do you blame me?"

"Well, I guess bringing home Selena Gomez was worth it, but at the same time, isn't it the same thing? I mean, she went from Disney princess to a movie about a drug dealer."

"Yeah, I guess so, but we sold weed for three years, J. I can relate to that. I can't relate to shaving half your head, twerking all over the internet, getting a fashion award for being half dressed and being named number one on the Maxim hot list when there were girls like Rihanna and Megan Fox on there. Selena is so much hotter than Miley fuckin' Cyrus, and she was number two. Plus, I got to throw the bird to Bieber too, bringing her home."

He barked a laugh. "You only know Megan Fox because she took _you _home."

"Your point?"

"Right, no point at all. I see what you mean though, and yeah. It was pretty fun seeing all of the reporters asking Justin how it felt to turn Selena Gomez gay."

"Yeah, it was pretty satisfying, and that just might be me being a dick."

"Yeah, it was sort of a dick move for sure."

"Look, I just wanna get on a cloud this weekend, lay back with all of the other free spirits of the world, find myself again, and listen to some good and honestly made music."

"Tell me about it. It's gonna be great. I promise you that, B. You can smoke yourself into a coma all you want, but there are going to be some sick artists. They got Radiohead, Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, The Black Keys, Kendrick Lamar, Childish Gambino, The Weeknd, AVICII, and David Guetta's going too. Epic lineup, bro."

"That sounds good. I love Kendrick's flow. The kid has potential."

"Doesn't he though? That whole album was ridiculously ingenius."

"Having Dr. Dre behind you really helps out too."

"That's for sure. He's an endorsement for the best in the west."

"Yeah, maybe hearing that good old rap will get me back to base."

"Hey, what I was saying though is that movies have a dynamic, B. I know you hate the predictable endings, but there are some out there that don't have that."

Her face lit up subtly as if realizing something. "Like pornos."

He chuckled. "Right, like that. Maybe you should make some. I mean, with a Victoria's Secret model in your bed, it might not be a bad idea. Maybe you can feel something again."

"Maybe, but go on."

"Well, I'm saying. Music is creative. It's realistic but yet so abstract and inspiring that it makes anything possible. The greatest movies are nothing without the perfect score like 'Eye of the Tiger' in Rocky. He never would have been as great without that background music." Beca snorted at that. "Those scores that bring people to tears, you know. They make you feel each scene, each action, each emotion conveyed by a character. Therefore, movies have that same sense that music does, and maybe escaping reality for a couple of hours will do your wild and creative imagination good."

"Well...let's see how this weekend goes, and maybe I can open my mind up."

"I'm sure it will."

"Just make sure you have enough green to get me there."

"Already stocked. No worries. It's only like two hours anyway."

"J, I couldn't last half an hour."

"True. Bree isn't coming, huh?"

"No, she has some contracts to finalize."

His face fell instantly. It was always hard for him not to have Aubrey around as much as he would like. It had been so since he was a kid with Aubrey always having to work to make ends meet, to keep him comfortable. He appreciated her dearly, but he only wished the siblings could bond more as a whole. Aubrey was really the only parent figure that he had left. He had always been slightly envious that his twin sister had full access to the blonde what with being in business together. Aubrey had offered to manage him as well, but he knew it would only put a strain on her, and he had been content with Ashley, a girl he had met at UCLA and casually dated from time to time, helping him with his career. He had always been the weakest, softest, most emotional of the three children, and he only wished he could have the tough exterior and hardened hearts of his sisters. It was a bit ironic in his opinion, but he did love them with every fiber of his being. He was just glad they had not left him back in Barden. He didn't expect them to because he was the baby and had no other family, but just the same, Beca didn't have to let him move in with her. She had relentlessly insisted however, and he would miss her too much to say no even when she took the loft over the shared place with Kimmy Jin. Although Beca would never say it out loud, she would miss him too dearly.

"She said she would see us when we got back," Beca quickly backtracked to ease her brother's mind, and the whole twin telepathy thing really came in hand. "We'll get dinner or something."

"I just don't see why she has to live alone," he huffed.

"You know Bree. She likes the space, and she works so damn much and gets her mind on something that it's impossible to keep up with. She wanted us to grow up too, J. You know how she is about this stuff."

"Yeah, I know. She 'won't always be there to wipe our noses'," he drawled, mocking his oldest sister's favorite cadence. "I just-miss her is all. I mean, I understand where she's coming from because of Mom and our dad, but-yeah, I miss her a lot."

"I know, J, but once we get back on our feet, we'll have more time."

"Yeah, okay. Well I'm gonna swing by Benji's for a bit then I'll pick up Ashley, and we'll get this show on the road, alright?"

"Benji's not coming?"

"Oh, naw. David Blaine's at the House of Blues tonight or something like that. I dunno. He just said he couldn't come."

"Oh, well tell him I said hey."

"Will do. Just be ready by six-ish."

"Alright, J. See you in a bit."

He headed out now as she poured herself another mug of coffee, chuckling at the boyish excitement that her brother portrayed. She could not deny that she was slightly envious of the ability that her twin possessed to become instantly so impenetrably enchanted with such small details like visiting their weird friend Benji, a certified illusionist that had an obsession with Star Wars and Dungeons and Dragons at age twenty-two. His best asset however was his intelligence. He was an outrageously smart guy, and he had created the best weed the twins had ever come in contact with even after selling every different kind they now knew in a span of three years. He and Jesse had met in college, and when he met Beca, the friendship between the three slowly blossomed. Beca sometimes wondered if Aubrey really liked the kid because she loved to entertain his magic shows in their living room, getting overly excited, a trait Beca knew her sister could not genuinely concoct. Maybe it was just Aubrey's motherly instinct however, and Benji sure could use it.

Beca then retreated to her studio once she heard the door lock, lighting up a joint and opening the lid of her laptop. She stared at the visual of her newest mix begrudgingly, teeth grinding together before she inhaled another drag. Had anyone peered into the studio at this certain time, they would see the cool, calm and collected Beca Mitchell, joint securely pressed between her lips with her long, chocolate locks cascading around her shoulders which were clothed by a Hugh Hefner style robe. They would see the serenity in her steel blue eyes, one side of her mouth slightly inclined. They would see the once great DJ Titanium B in her element, but what they could not see was the nervous wreck thrashing around inside of Beca's head. It was almost like readying herself for brain surgery. If the procedure of finding herself again didn't work, she would surely lose her mind. She wanted to make music again, _her _music, and she would be damned if she allowed this industry to ironically take that away from her.


	2. She Handed Me an Ice Blue Whatever

**_A/N: Okay so chapter two. Im just tossing this out, so yeah. Hope you're enjoying it so far. The song used in this chapter is "Thinking Bout You" by Frank Ocean and of course the title track here at the beginning "Novacane". right so_**

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"Hey, B!" the tall, thick brunette with the cute smile greeted as Beca entered the kitchen.

"Hey, Ash," Beca replied with a small smile. "How are you?"

"I'm doing okay. How's the business going?"

"Eh, backwards right about now, but-"

"But this weekend's therapy is going to get the train a-chugging again," Jesse chimed.

Beca quirked an eyebrow. "How are we related again?"

He playfully slugged her shoulder before going upstairs to retrieve his bags. When he returned Beca stood from her seat at the table.

"I think we should take Blue," she said.

"Sounds good," he agreed before disappearing through the garage.

She picked up her bags from beside the door and followed him shortly thereafter to her truck she had named Blue. It was a dark Navy 2012 Chevy Silverado with a Batman decal on the back. She loved the truck as much as her Charger. Jesse had already pulled down the tailgate and began arranging the luggage within. She took his place before he opened up the large garage door, retrieving Ashley's bags from the back of the jeep and handing them to Beca. After they had the trunk loaded, he pulled the jeep into the garage then backed the Charger out of the drive in order to pull the truck out, and Beca went to lock up the house. Once she finished that, she slid into the driver's seat of the truck, Ashley beside her, and brought the engine to life. She pulled out onto the street, and Jesse proceeded to park the Charger, Kiera, in the garage. He locked it up before stepping out, closing up the garage. He walked back down the drive and slid into the passenger seat of the truck before Beca drove off down the road.

"So who's up tomorrow?" the DJ asked, eyes on the road.

"Kendrick, Black Keys, Swedish House Mafia, and Frank Ocean mainly. Oh, hey, and Gotye's gonna be there Sunday night too. It was just announced."

"Nice. Frank's gonna have a wicked set."

"Well, I'd imagine so. He's still performing the two songs you helped him with every chance he gets, even the one you sang on. They're fire, you know."

"Yeah, I guess so. Light one up, would you?"

Jesse took the bag of pre-rolled joints she handed him and took a lighter from his pocket, lighting up the stick and inhaling deeply to keep the flame. He then handed it over to Beca, both rolling down their windows. After Beca had her fill, she offered it to Ashley, who gratefully took it. The DJ then pulled out her iPod and plugged it into the auxiliary cable protruding from the stereo. She put on Jay-Z's Blueprint 3 to get a feel for it all over again. It had been an enthralling experience producing a hit for Jay and Alicia Keys, one that really brought east coast hip-hop back to base. She recalled working for hours writing the hook to "Empire State of Mind", Alicia sitting beside her and testing out each chorus Beca jotted down. At last, they had come to one that they both enjoyed, and it had quickly skyrocketed, bringing ROC Nation and their head honcho virtually back from the dead. She smiled as the song played now, taking the joint back from Jesse and silently rapping along with the lyrics. She chuckled to herself. She had no idea how she of all people had grown with such a deep passion for hip-hop. Rapping had only been a guilty pleasure she indulged in in the mirror or the shower or the comfort of her closet. Yet, she never expected to be good. She wasn't someone that a normal person would pick out of a crowd as a rapper with her alternative look, tattoos and ear monstrosities as her sister called them when she first received the spikes in her ears. When Cynthia Rose had walked in the very first time, she had stood by the door while Beca recorded a freestyle verse for fun. Beca had never been so utterly embarrassed in her life, but Cynthia Rose on the other hand had never been so impressed. Beca couldn't believe it either because CR's flow was nice to say the least, working with the likes of Usher, Nelly and Chris Brown. Somehow, when her mother passed, the love for hearing her own voice went astray, and she was sure it was because it had always been her mother who had taken the role of her greatest critic and most avid fan. She had lost her mother, her voice along with her. She knew that she owed it to the record label that had stuck with her throughout her silent year to make an effort, hence the agreement to the gig. She had not been in front of a crowd in months, and she had not been on the hip-hop scene in over a year since Jay-Z's album drop. She had a verse on a couple of his biggest hits, and she knew he would bring her out to do them. She only prayed her body would agree to such impromptu dealings and let her be herself again, even if only for those forty-five seconds each song. Still, it would be better than nothing.

"I can't wait to see you up there," Jesse gushed, leaning back in his seat, an arm thrown haphazardly over the back of it, fingers resting on Ashley's shoulder.

"Yeah, B, this record was beautifully done," Ashley added with a backing nod.

"Thanks," Beca huffed. "I really hope it works out here, you know. There are some good artists out here, and a lot of them are some I would love to work with like Kendrick and Childish Gambino. I mean, I know I have to get my head out of my ass first."

"You will," her brother assured her lazily. "We're gonna be like we were in high school days this weekend, no care in the world and nothing but the music."

"When does Z Trip play?" Beca inquired after a beat of silence.

"Tomorrow actually, right before Kendrick."

"So Kendrick will see him spin. Damn, that guy's taken all my business I swear."

"Naw, B, you let all your business slip away. The kid's good, but he's got nothing on you. We've been telling you this."

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

"Besides, trust that Kendrick will stay to watch Jay-Z. You just have to knock it out."

Indio, California in the Coachella Valley was a beautiful place, much more serene in scenery than LA but was rightfully entitled the "place to be" when any of their vast array of festivals was in town. Coachella Music Festival was indeed the largest, and the entirety of the music industry vied for a spot in such a prestigious event. The trio arrived at their hotel just a few hundred yards from the outdoor venue, and they could see the many vehicles unloading equipment for the following day. They trumped upstairs after retrieving their key cards, discarding their luggage inside of the suite before leaving once more to get dinner. They walked down to a burger joint on the corner and sat down in a booth. They talked idly about the upcoming event, sipping milkshakes and eating their burgers. When they finished, they picked up a twelve-pack of beer before returning to the hotel. Jesse then pulled out the schedule for the following day, and as Beca popped a beer, her phone rang. She extracted the device from her pocket, smirking at the screen before sliding her finger over it.

"What up, Jay?" she answered.

"Lil B!" the rapper hollered with a chuckle. "What up, kid?"

"Nothing. Just got into town."

"Word. I'll be in tomorrow night. We'll get together, go through the setlist and all that. I got my folks meeting with Aubrey tomorrow mornin'. You good?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Excited to get back out there."

"Well, I miss working with ya, Lil B. After this, I wanna talk to you about my next project. Kanye's in on it wit' me, but we want you rockin' wit' us."

"Okay, we can definitely discuss it."

"Nice. A'ight, I'll holla tomorrow."

"Alright, Jay."

"Peace."

Beca hung up, and her brother was staring at her expectantly. She did not acknowledge him, instead opting to take a long swig of her beer, wiping her chin with the back of her hand.

"Well!" Jesse at last prompted.

"He just called to check in, make sure I'm good to go," Beca replied nonchalantly.

"That's it?"

"Yeah, apart from us meeting tomorrow night and his people meeting with Aubrey in the morning. Then he wants to talk about his next project."

"Whoomp! There it is!"

She rolled her eyes playfully, taking another swig of her beer. As she did so, her phone rang again. She answered after a few moments.

"Hey, kiddo, how are you?" Aubrey's voice immediately sounded before she said a word.

"Okay," she replied then.

"Did Jay-Z contact you?"

"Yes, he did. We meet with him tomorrow night."

"Okay, Luke will be there tomorrow afternoon just to sit in with you."

"Oh, okay, sounds good. How did it go with Ne-Yo?"

"He's still a bit apprehensive, but he agreed to another meeting after the festival, so it's looking good. Pink will be here in the evening tomorrow."

"Okay, well thank you, Bree."

"Bree!" Jesse suddenly shrieked, causing all three women to cringe. "Hi, Bree!"

Beca quickly put a chuckling Aubrey on speaker. "Hey, baby brother. How are you?"

"I'm doing great! Say hi to Ashley!"

"Hey, Ashley."

"Hi, Bree," Ashley returned.

"Well, you guys, don't have too much fun. Get back in one piece," Aubrey warned.

"Got it."

Beca then took her off speaker phone, pressing the device to her ear.

"Okay, Bree," she sighed.

"Yeah, I have to sit with Cynthia Rose for a bit to go over some stuff, but call me tomorrow, okay? Preferably following the meeting."

"Ay, ay, captain."

"Okay, love you guys. Watch your brother. Be safe."

"Will do. I love you too."

"Love you too!" Jesse hollered.

Aubrey chuckled before hanging up. Beca stuffed the device back into her pocket, giving her brother a questioning look. He just shrugged, taking another swig of his beer while his twin lit up another joint. As they continued to discuss the music they would be exposed to that weekend, Beca's excitement continually elevated though she wasn't entirely aware. It had been a very long time since she became so excited about something, anything. It wasn't her thing. She always portrayed any emotion with the same sullen face, a smirk at the most, her dark eyes empty of any feeling or tell. She had never experienced things of normalcy such as school clubs, sports, relationships or friendships where you hang out and shoot the breeze. She had her siblings for that. Benji had been the only exception, and it was a miracle that she was able to enchant so many fans with her mysterious disposition. She got along real well with Luke but only because the blonde man was just as too cool for soft emotion as she was. He was a womanizer, working his charm to get what he wanted but never fully trusting or caring for his countless victims. It's what made him good at his job which consisted of scouting talent. He had no trouble being honest with those who sought his critique, and it had brought the label balance, but with their last two artists falling flat on their faces, they were starting from scratch it seemed, and Beca would be at the helm in the production of fresh talent.

The next morning, Jesse shook Beca await shortly after ten a.m. She groggily slipped out of bed, grabbing clothes before walking into the bathroom to change. She had text messages from Luke, Stacie and a few others, but she left them for after she was ready. She brushed her teeth, ran a comb through her hair and fixed her makeup before throwing on a blue tanktop and matching plaid shorts. She then slid into her blue Converse shoes and exited the bathroom. Jesse and Ashley were kissing over their cups of coffee on the balcony. She smirked as she picked up the third steaming cup, lit a joint, and sat at the table near the TV to read over her messages. Stacie's only said good luck and that she would see the DJ when she returned. Luke advised her that he would meet her down at the park at around six. Jay-Z's manager had sent an e-mail that they would meet in Jay's bus outside of the venue at seven, and she compared that to the music schedule on the table. She wouldn't miss anyone important, and she would have an hour before Z-Trip's set, two before Kendrick Lamar's. She gave herself a nod before sending back confirmation of the meeting.

Twenty minutes later, Beca, Jesse and Ashley headed down to the venue with a whole flood of others. They flashed their V.I.P passes at the gate, the security recognizing her and giving her a pat on the shoulder. She lit up the moment they were inside of the park, and they took places before the stage currently housing Afrojack, a Dutch DJ that Beca had met at a few industry mixers. He caught her eye and lofted a hand in a small wave. She saluted him with her signature smirk in place, taking a drag of her smoke. Soon, she was lazing in the grass on the cloud she had coveted since deciding to venture into the festival, Jesse and Ashley beside her. The music was definitely amazing, Beca always appreciating the realest records live. It was when their purest forms manifested, and even though she would return back to LA half deaf, she was enjoying it far too much.

At around six, when Childish Gambino came to the stage, she was really into it. He was a twenty-nine-year old comedian and rapper that Beca thoroughly enjoyed for his abstract lyrics that really touched on honest subjects. It was inspirational and not aspirational, her main comparison in hip-hop to determine whether an artist had "it" or not. As they watched him, a tall, blonde man appeared in Beca's line of sight in a grey v-neck and jean shorts. Beca nodded up at him with a smile.

"B," he said, stepping forward and bumping her fist.

"Luke," she returned as he sat beside her.

"You almost ready for the meeting?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to see this kid."

"Childish Gambino. Good artist."

"Yeah, he's pure. He has that charisma, you know?"

"For sure."

They listened to the music until five minutes to seven then Beca let Jesse and Ashley know they would be back. Beca then followed Luke through the back gates of the venue, flashing their badges to security, and finding Jay's bus at the end, "ROC Nation" plastered on the side in front of a diamond. She smiled. She had had a good run with the label, working with Jay-Z, Kanye West, Frank Ocean and Rihanna in her second year out. Rihanna's "Diamonds" had actually been composed in the skybox of a prestigious New York club, Beca and the ROC princess taking shots and talking bullshit before the pop star began singing, off-key I might add, to the DJ. The fruit of this spontaneous act was the chart-topping single, and Beca had never been more proud.

They entered the bus where the man himself sat back at the small pulldown table puffing a cigar and laughing at something the man next to him had said. She recognized him instantly, and the rapper and singer stood up grasping her hand and jerking her into a half hug.

"DJ Titanium muthafuckin' B!" he chuckled heartily.

"Frank Muthafuckin' Ocean!" she replied before shaking Jay-Z's offered hand. "Jigga."

"Lil B," he returned. "What up, young?"

"You know."

"Aye, I just told Frankie here you was coming."

"Yeah, I'm kinda pissed he didn't tell me sooner," Frank sighed. "I'm up after Kendrick. You think you could get up there with me?"

"If you guys keep doing this, I'm gonna steal the show," she joked, and they cackled.

"For good reason, B. You're the king of all this, and it's been awhile since we heard you go at it."

"Well, I don't know. I mean, I haven't done it in awhile."

"Yo, you run it. I trust you enough to pull you last minute. I never trust people like that. Come on, kid. I know you can do it. Z Trip goes on in a bit. That dude's been trying to say he's the king of the decks in LA. Spin the shit then jump on the mic, and show him up."

Beca pondered it a moment, looking up at Luke, and he gave her a firm nod. At last, she turned to the two artists with a big grin.

"How can I turn down Frank Muthafuckin' Ocean?" she asked.

"Ha ha!" he boomed, embracing her once more. "That's what I'm talkin' 'bout!"

After getting through the actual business meeting with Jay-Z and going over Frank's set and all compensation with the Def Jam label, Beca and Luke left the bus, parting ways while Beca headed to Z-Trip's stage, and Luke went off to find something to eat. She lit up once she was back inside of the venue and walked towards the stage. She didn't see any sign of Jesse or Ashley, but she was sure they were fine, probably upfront. Jesse always loved to scope the competition to Beca's amusement, so she had a hunch that he was as close to the stage as possible while Z-Trip set up his equipment. The crowd had begun to gather around, awaiting his set. When Beca went into her slump, Z-Trip was the one that everyone called to fill in. When her mother died, and she took her hiatus, it was he who filled the industry's void, and she never recovered from the event. Now, she was back. Maybe seeing the man who fancied himself an LA god would spark something inside of her. She stood idly near a tree a few yards from the immediate crowd, taking a long drag of the joint between her fingers. As she did, she noticed someone walk towards her and nonchalantly sit against the tree. Beca took in the girl's appearance, biting back a chuckle. She looked to be dressed in what could only be deemed as a Pocahontas costume, a band around her head with a feather sticking up. Her hair was a fiery red hue, pulled into two long braids at either side of the back of her head. As she turned slightly to the side, Beca caught a glimpse of bright blue eyes, the most vivid color she had ever seen. They seemed to shine in the moonlight, deep as the ocean and just as enticing. Beca tore her eyes away as music began, and she took another drag of her joint. As the first song built, she could see in her peripheral the girl moving to the music slightly. She had war paint smeared beneath those deep cerulean orbs, and though it was a shocking sight, Beca was quite enthralled by the girl. She seemed so carefree and lively, a remnant of what Beca once was and wished to be again. Beca kept her eyes on the stage as Z-Trip interacted with the crowd. As she shifted from one foot to the other anxiously, taking another long hit of the smoke, the girl seemed to at last realize her presence in such close proximity and turned to face her. She donned a megawatt smile, and though Beca didn't look directly at her, she could see the shine of white teeth now visible. Still, she kept her eyes dead ahead.

"Would you like to sit down?" the girl yelled over the music at the brunette.

Beca's eyes flashed to hers now, deep navy meeting crystal blue. That smile was infectious, but Beca restrained the urge to mimic. She instead donned her trademark smirk, but the fact of the matter was that she was drawn to those eyes for some odd reason. Before she could think, her feet drove her forward, taking a seat on the ice cold lawn with her joint between her teeth.

"Hi, I'm Chloe," the girl introduced, holding out a hand.

"Beca," Beca returned, taking the wrap from her mouth and shaking her hand.

"Oh, I know who you are, but I just figured you didn't come to be hassled."

"Smart girl. You must go to UCLA."

"Berkeley actually. Upstate."

"Oh, yeah? Close enough. Still all brains, and..." Beca stopped herself, quickly putting the joint to her lips as Chloe giggled.

"The great Beca Mitchell's not as articulate in person I guess."

"No, I am, but pretty girls seem to cloud the mind." Her eyes bulged at the corny comment, but she quickly turned it around with a smirk. "See what I mean?"

Chloe giggled again, and it was then that Beca really listened to the sweet, billowy sound, a sound that Beca was positive she could get used to. She composed herself with another drag, looking back at the stage.

"Who did you come to see?" Beca asked.

"Z-Trip," Chloe replied nonchalantly as Beca bit back a scoff. "Kidding. I just came to see as much as I could, but there's a few things I'm looking forward to. No one told me that my favorite DJ was coming though." She winked at Beca now, but Beca didn't turn to her. "So who are you here for?"

"I came to see Jigga," she replied, eyes unwavering. "Well, perform with him, but I just got roped into another set in a couple of hours with Frank Ocean."

"Oh my gosh, really? Okay, I can't even play it cool now. I love that song you guys did, 'Thinking About You'. It's so amazing because he hits those high notes, and your voice is so solid."

"Thanks. It means a lot."

"Okay, I'm not an E! reporter. Don't give me that prerecorded answer."

Beca chuckled. "Brave, are we? Alright, but yeah. I really appreciate it, you know. I'm here to get out of this funk I've been in, so I'm glad people still know me and support me."

"Oh, please, I love you." Her eyes bulged. "I mean, your music. I-I mean, well you-"

"Now, look who's articulate," Beca chuckled. "Don't worry, Red. I get it."

"Well, you know, when you and Cynthia Rose came out with the remake of 'No Diggity', I really fell in love with your flow. Who knew you could rap?"

The DJ snorted. "Yeah, I get that a lot."

"Well, it's true, but you're awesome. Now, I'm more excited about this."

"Really? Because I'm super nervous."

"Why?"

"I haven't been on stage in a long time, and I haven't touched a mic in longer."

"You'll be fine. Music must be like second nature to you. Your body and mind will know what to do, you know."

"Yeah." There was a beat of silence as they enjoyed the music. "So what are you going to school for?"

"I wanna be a dentist really badly."

Beca snorted involuntarily, and Chloe's eyes narrowed. "Sorry, sorry, but-you went to Berkeley for a dental degree? Are you from there or something? I mean, you seem like the doctor type for sure, but dentist?"

"I just-I don't know. I always thought doctor too, but I just-I always loved my dentist, and I know that it's much scarier than just a check-up with a doctor to see a dentist, so I wanna be able to calm the kids that come in and-take care of their teeth."

Beca laughed again. "You are intriguing. I will admit that."

"Thank you? I mean, yeah. I know I could've stayed in LA to get my degree, but I didn't wanna go to any college in LA apart from UCLA, and they rejected me. Then my best friend Amy was accepted into Berkeley right after me, so we just decided on it, and I received my share of scholarships to help out with the outrageous cost."

"Fair enough, and I how are you paying for the rest of it?"

Chloe's face fell serious now. "I'm paying for tuition doing the porn in the valley," she deadpanned.

"At least you're working," Beca replied in the same tone.

There was a beat of silence as they sat frozen, eyes boring into one another, before Chloe fell over in a fit of laughter. Beca broke into a grin without really meaning too.

"I'm just fuckin' with you," the redhead breathed when she had calmed herself enough to do so.

"Hey, I'm not mad at you either way," Beca assured her. "You-would be worth putting on any screen if I do say so."  
Chloe ducked her head to cover the blush in her cheeks. "Thanks. You're not so bad yourself."

Before Beca could reply again, Z-Trip's voice came through the speakers, alerting them all that his set was almost over. The time had certainly flown by, and Beca sobered quickly, knowing she had only a little more than one hour to get it together and be ready for her set with Frank. Chloe read the change in Beca's mood all too easily.

"Hey," she called softly, cautiously reaching over and resting her hand on Beca's. "You're amazing. You're gonna do fine. He wouldn't have you on if he didn't trust you."

"Yeah, I know," Beca breathed before chuckling nervously. "I just-damn, you're not supposed to see me this vulnerable, you know."

"It'll be our little secret," Chloe husked, leaning closer to the DJ and causing her to shudder. "Was that weed you were smoking?"

Beca's eyes flew open. "Uh, yeah. Why? Is that a problem?"

"No, no, but I think I have something that will really get you on the right level."

"What would that be?"

Chloe didn't answer. Instead, she leaned away to the other side of her where a messenger bag lay. Reaching inside, she extracted an ice blue bong, handing it over to Beca along with a lighter. The brunette quirked an eyebrow at the redhead, but the latter did not offer any further explanation. She instead gestured to the bong and gave Beca an expectant look. Beca paused only a moment before putting the top of the bong to her lips, lighting up the bowl and inhaling a deep hit before pulling out the bowl and sucking up the excess smoke within, watching it swirl around the glass. As she inhaled, she coughed, but it was not due to the usual burning sensation with weed. It was more like taking in a breath in the middle of Antarctica, the cold vapors shocking her lungs. It had no immediate identifiable taste, but Beca could only categorize it as sweet water. She smacked her lips, and it was then that she realized that her entire body was tingling. It was the feeling that was summoned when a limb falls asleep and is in the process of awakening again. It was marvelous, her whole body on a level never experienced before. Chloe took a hit now, inhaling and exhaling without a hitch.

"I-I can't feel my face," Beca said hazily. "What are we smoking anyway."

"Shhh," Chloe crooned, leaning closer to her. "Don't let the high go to waste."

With that, Chloe took another big hit before reaching over, grasping the back of Beca's neck. She then pulled her in, pressing their lips together and blowing the hit into the DJ's mouth. Beca instinctively wrapped her arms around Chloe's waist, pulling her impossibly closer and deepening the kiss. When they pulled away, the smoke appeared between them, landing them in a frosty haze as the high intensified.

"What is that?" Beca breathed, their foreheads resting together.

"You wow me tonight, DJ, then you wow me tomorrow, and I'll share my secret," Chloe bargained, running a hand up the DJ's neck.

"Deal."

After that, Beca enjoyed Kendrick Lamar's set on an entirely new level, and she was rapping along with him throughout another joint. Chloe assured her that those two hits of her "magic" was quite enough to keep her at an acceptable level throughout her set, and she had to concur. As Kendrick's set came closer to its ending, Beca stood, Chloe with her. She turned to the redhead, tucking a stray copper lock behind her ear.

"How about..." she began, pulling off her VIP pass and putting it around Chloe's neck. "You meet me backstage after?"

"Yeah?" Chloe husked.

"Yeah."

"Okay, I'll be there. Go get 'em."

Chloe kissed her forehead softly before Beca treaded away towards the back of the stage. Frank was already back there, and he took in her relaxed posture and hazy eyes. He gave her a smile as they shook hands, and he could feel the difference from their earlier embrace. Her muscles had lost their tension, and she was in a better place mentally.

"Glad you took the edge off, B," he chuckled.

"Yeah, so am I," she replied.

"You good though?"

"Never been better. Let's do this."

When Kendrick came off of the stage, finishing out with his hit song "Swimming Pools", he shook Frank's hand before turning to Beca. He shook her hand too in the usual half hug.

"Titanium B," he noted aloud. "You're alive."

"Yeah," she replied with a light laugh. "You're killing it, I see."

"Oh, for sure. You up with Frankie tonight?"

"Yeah, why don't you stay for the show? I'll be with Jigga tomorrow too."

"Word? Yeah, I'll most definitely stay. I've never had a chance to see you, but I've heard good things. The Jay-Z album you worked on was straight dope."

"Thanks. I hope you enjoy this."

"Go kill 'em. Maybe then we can work something out."

With that, Beca headed up onto the stage feeling a new boost of confidence, and suddenly, getting onstage was more of an addiction than a fear as it had once been for her. The crowd roared, all jaws dropping and eyes popping when they caught sight of the DJ, unaware that she would be there. Frank stepped to the mic with haste.

"What up, yall!" he greeted to the roar of his fans. "Now, I just wanna say I have a special guest in the mix tonight. Ya'll know her. Welcome my good friend, DJ Titanium B!"

The crowd went wild as she waved from behind the decks, indulging in the applause and feeling herself fly to an impossibly higher level than she was. Whatever Chloe had given her was having conflicting impacts on her all at once. She could feel again for the first time yet she was numb and could feel nothing at all. In a sense, she was physical numb but mentally alert. She started it off with a scratch to the turntables before starting the beat, and Frank went in on his first song. He seamlessly went through the mix as Beca added her own spin, and it had always been easy for him to transition with her. The audience was enthralled, but they were also eager. At last, the song everyone had been anticipating began to play to close out the phenomenal set, and Beca took the offered microphone from the stage manager, waiting for her cue to start off the first verse before stepping out from behind the decks to the front of the stage.

**_A tornado flew around my room before you came_**

**_Excuse the mess it made, it usually doesn't rain_**

**_In Southern California, much like Arizona_**

**_My eyes don't shed tears, but, boy, they bawl_**

Frank stepped in now, crooning the girls in the front row as he leaned over, shaking waiting hands and pouring his soul out in his beautiful, high-pitched voice in the chorus.

_When I'm thinkin' 'bout you (ooh, no, no, no)_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you (you know, know, know)_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you_

_Do you think about me still?_

_Do ya, do ya?_

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

Beca flawlessly came in with the second verse, and she caught sight of Jesse and Ashley who looked both shocked and impressed as Jesse recorded the set. Luke stood further in the back with a smirk on his face. The girls closest to her just about swooned when she kneeled at the front of the stage and held out a hand to be grabbed, tugged, kissed.

**_No, I don't like you, I just thought you were cool_**

**_Enough to kick it_**

**_Got a beach house I could sell you in Idaho_**

**_Since you think I don't love you, I just thought you were cute_**

**_That's why I kissed you_**

**_Got a fighter jet, I don't get to fly it, though_**

_I'm lyin' down thinkin' 'bout you (ooh, no, no, no)_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you (you know, know, know)_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you_

_Do you think about me still?_

_Do ya, do ya?_

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

Beca came in for the final bridged before closing out the hook with Frank now.

**_Yes, of course_**

**_I remember, how could I forget (how could I forget)?_**

**_How you feel (how you feel)?_**

**_You know you were my first time (time)._**

**_A new feel_**

**_It won't ever get old, not in my soul,_**

**_Not in my spirit, keep it alive (spirit, keep it alive)_**

**_We'll go down this road_**

**_'Til it turns from color to black and white_**

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

_Or do you not think so far ahead (ahead)?_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever (Oooh, oooh)_

The rush that ran through Beca when the standing ovation came from all around the venue filled her heart with a raging inferno of desire and pleasure, something long removed from her heart. She was genuinely smiling, waving out at her fans before returning to the decks and clearing the list for the next DJ. She would need her own laptop the next night, but she had delt with the house equipment tonight since it was last minute. Kendrick was the first to appear backstage, and he pulled her into that half embrace, half handshake quickly before stepping back.

"I'll definitely be in touch, B," he assured her.

She nodded before being pulled away by several different people. Her and Frank hugged then she waved out to Jay-Z, who was further behind the stage. She shook a slew of hands before wiggling out of the crowd. Once she had escaped, she was met with a sliver of deep blue orbs that glistened in the dim lights of the venue though they were downcast. She smirked as the redhead stood there, fingers fiddling with the VIP pass as she stared anxiously at her shoes. When she felt another presence, she looked up, smiling when she found the DJ standing there.

"One night down, one to go," she relayed with a smile.

"Oh, I'm not done yet," Beca informed her.

Chloe cocked an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yeah, I plan to wow you once more tonight. Your hotel room empty?"

Chloe nodded, and without another word, she grabbed the brunette's hand and pulled her towards the exit.


	3. When I'm Gone, Love Me None

**_A/N: Okay so I hope you're enjoying it this far. All songs in this chapter are from Jay-Z's "Blueprint 3" album aside from the final verse in this that Beca raps. That was written by yours truly. Its the all-caps one to be clear. So, here we go. And im sorry if you dont like Aubrey and Beca being related or jesse and beca or the batman thing. if you dont like it, you dont have to read it but it means something to me so...yeah anyway _**

* * *

Chloe unceremoniously shoved Beca onto her hotel bed after locking the door. They had taken a few more hits from the redhead's mysterious bong, and Beca was higher than she had ever been. Her body buzzed with the substance in her system and the adrenaline of the set, but she could still slightly feel the rough touches of her companion. She tore off Chloe's costume quickly, her lips sealed to the skin directly over her pulse point. Chloe moaned in acceptance, hands tangled carelessly in chocolate tresses. Beca rolled them over so that she was now pressed atop the redhead's body, her hands exploring the sun-kissed skin vigorous fervor. Moonlight streamed through the slightly parted drapes over the windows, illuminating deep cerulean orbs and stormy blue pools. Chloe pulled off the brunette's tanktop before sliding her hands between them and unbuttoning her shorts. Her fingers diligently traced over the chiseled abs, another breathy moan escaping her lips before her hands moved up to grip bulging biceps that were the proof of early mornings in the gym and pushups before bedtime. The sound emitted from her actions drew Beca's lips to the redhead's fiercely now, pressing them together in a bruising kiss. Beca picked her up effortlessly, sliding them further onto the bed and reaching up to unclasp Chloe's bra in one swift motion. She yanked it off, throwing it behind her. Chloe did the same with matched haste. Beca's hand slid inside of the lacy fabric of Chloe's underwear, teasing the wet folds as Chloe gasped. With her feet, she removed Beca's boxer shorts, and they fell to the ground. Chloe pled for entry with her eyes, many shades darker than they had been before but her voice lost to the drug they were now infused with and the lust blurring her thoughts. Beca trailed hot open-mouthed kisses down her neck to the valley of her breasts before taking one in her mouth, nipping slightly then soothing it with her tongue. The song escaping Chloe's lips in a melodic sequence of moans and gasps propelled Beca further, and she felt it. She felt the lust, the desire, the need and want like she had not felt in a very long time, like she had never felt before really. It had never been so intense, but it was irrevocably welcomed. Her tongue cascaded down Chloe's body, the redhead's grip tightening on the hair grasped in her digits. Beca teased her center softly, nipping and sucking as Chloe let out a throaty moan, unable to speak the words caught in her throat. She needed Beca, wanted her right then and now, a want so powerful that it alone could throw her over the edge. Never had she felt so strongly towards another. Still, the drugs clouded her mind, and in the back of her overcrowded mind, she assured herself that it was no more than lust. This was a one-time thing, and neither of them would pursue more after this. She was focused solely on school, and she...

Her thought trailed off as Beca ascended once more, sliding two fingers into her slick opening. Chloe huffed out a breath, hands leaving the brown locks to claw at the hungry DJ's shoulder blades, tearing away skin and leaving bloody trails. Beca could not feel that though. She could only feel Chloe's hips buck upwards to meet her stroke, causing her to gain speed. She could only feel the heat between them, melting them into one another. She bit down on Chloe's neck roughly, and Chloe let out an agonizingly lustful scream. She ground into Beca's hand so that it was pressed flush between the both of them, Beca's center now burning with passion. She grunted deeply, and Chloe was impossibly turned on more by the sound. The thrusts were consistent, a steady rhythm, and Chloe's moans followed it. Beca's mind was a haze, but she could feel the pleasure seeping into her core as they quickly approached their respective climaxes. Soon she felt Chloe's walls tighten around her fingers, the loudest scream emitted from her as she arched off of the bed, holding Beca tightly against her. As the redhead descended, Beca continued to thrust until she too came hard and fast, letting out a loud grunt and soft gasp. They arched into one another once more before collapsing onto the bed. Chloe pulled Beca's hand up, and Beca licked her fingers seductively, the hunger evident in the action with eyes half shut. Chloe moaned in approval before attaching her lips to the brunette's in a deep kiss. When they pulled away, their breathing continued in panting.

"What the hell have you done to me, Red?" the DJ breathed, on the brink of unconsciousness.

"What needed to be done, DJ," Chloe returned breathlessly.

"I can't feel a thing. Yet, I feel it all."

"That's the beauty of it."

She then proceeded to drag Beca under the covers, embracing their high as red locks were splayed across Beca's chest. She stroked them thoughtlessly, indulging in the warm breaths dancing along her bare skin. Chloe's fingers danced along her stomach lazily before the clouds in their minds darkened, and they succumbed to sleep.

* * *

After breakfast, a shared shower reenacting the night before against the tiled wall beneath the spray of warm water, and a smoke session with Chloe, Beca made her way back to her hotel room the next morning to change. It was no secret that the DJ remained floating on a cloud, and when she entered the room, she was met with smirks from Luke and Jesse. She cocked a lazy eyebrow, taking the offered cup of coffee from Ashley.

"Where did you disappear to last night?" her brother asked.

"Hmm?" Beca hummed, taking a sip of her cup.

"Please, B, I could hear your dirty thoughts from here. Twin telepathy, remember?"

"Those had to be your own, J."

"I'm pretty sure I caught a glimpse of a redhead dragging you along, Mate," Luke interjected, a thoughtful look adorning his features. "Yeah, definitely a redheaded indian."

Beca snorted a laugh. "Fact."

"What!?" Jesse sounded. "Who was it?"

"This girl I met at the concert. A dentist."

"A dentist?"

"Well, going to be a dentist. She goes to Berkeley, and man, she got me higher than I've ever been right before the set. I have no idea what it was, but..."

"Well, she may have revived you," Luke went on. "You killed that set mercilessly, and Aubrey's been fielding calls all morning. She met with Pink, and she's already agreed to have you work on her next single. Ne-Yo called as soon as he got word of the set. Saw it on Youtube, and he wants a trial run on a couple of tracks he has written."

"Then it's good."

"I'm saying we kidnap that girl and take her home with us."

"I'm not...too against that."

Jesse smirked again. "That good, huh?"

"_That_ good."

"Did you take my advice? Make a movie?"

She slugged his arm with a chuckle. "No, ya goof."

"Just checking."

When the group made it down to the venue at half past two, A$AP Rocky was onstage rocking it. Beca liked his flow, but she wasn't all too impressed with his lyrical content. His wordplay had its sparks here and there, but it was nothing that wowed her or stayed in her memory. David Guetta was due that night as well as The Black Keys and Bon Iver, and the venue was undoubtedly even more packed tonight than it had been the night before. Sunday night would feature Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg as the headliners, and they would be opened for by the likes of Calvin Harris, AVICII, Thundercat, The Weeknd and Gotye. Beca knew that Sunday would be a big day, but they had put Jay-Z on the second day in order to give him a headline slot. The man was certainly making a comeback, but Dr. Dre was pulling a lot of heat these days housing guys like Kendrick Lamar and helping Eminem turn his own label into a powerhouse across the grid. Word had it that the two West Coast legends had a big surprise in store for their audience as well, and the hype grew with every passing second. Beca was at her wit's end with excitement at this point, and she could not wait to be back on stage. Not only would she mix and sing tonight with Jay. She would rap, and she had to know she could still do it. She had to know she had not lost anything in her time away. The simplicity of rhyming words was only the tip of the iceberg when referencing hip-hop to Beca. The beauty of it was in the story told, the array of different tools used to create the delivery of a tale that moved audiences and related to everyone personally in their own way. It was time to make her own comeback in addition to helping everyone else with their own. She was ready, and she had never been so sure. She couldn't help but thank God and her mother that she had met Chloe by mere accident.

Chloe met the group at the stage, kissing Beca's cheek before the DJ introduced her to her twin brother, Luke, and Ashley. They then settled beneath the tree from the night prior, Beca lighting up a joint subconsciously but immediately realizing that she was still high from smoking with Chloe. The weed intensified it slightly, kept it at an even level, but she recognized that the green alone would not get her on the correct height. Chloe only smirked, seeing Beca's look of realization as she stared down at the joint. She then passed it Jesse, pulling the redhead in between her legs. Chloe obediently leaned back into the brunette's embrace, and Luke and Jesse exchanged smug looks as the latter took a drag of the smoke. They had never seen such a sight. Beca wasn't one to get cuddly or act with public displays of affection. Even the models and actresses that constantly strived for her attention at big events would be sat off to the side, Beca shaking off any extensive holding of hands or kisses in the public eye.

As the night wound down to the headlining set, Chloe could feel Beca's body begin to buzz with energy, but she also knew she would need a boost. She pulled out the familiar ice blue bong when Luke, Jesse and Ashley went off to find a snack and handed it back to the DJ with an hour before showtime. Beca gratefully accepted the bong, putting it to her lips without hesitation this time and taking a large hit, the perfect size to carry her through the next hour as well as the set. Beca nodded to David Guetta's intricate and colorful set as Chloe shotgunned her, once again blowing a hit into the brunette's lips. Her body was tingling again, and a goofy grin adorned her flushed face. Chloe gently pecked her lips once more before trailing kisses along her jawline. Beca pulled her onto her lap, nipping at her earlobe lazily.

"You're gonna kill me, woman," she muttered, her breath tickling the shell of Chloe's ear.

"Are you complaining?" Chloe breathed, hands now beneath Beca's red tanktop.

"Not in the slightest."

"Good."

"What's the secret?"

"Novacane."

The word was whispered breathlessly, and Beca wasn't sure if she had heard correctly. She had not expected an answer, and her fogged mind wasn't in the right state to fully comprehend, but it was irrelevant at the moment. She instead accepted the high and allowed herself to be engulfed by it. Before she knew it, David Guetta's set was coming to an end, and she stood. Chloe followed suit, and their eyes locked.

"Will you be waiting?" Beca asked shyly.

"Yeah," Chloe returned with a curt nod.

Beca pecked the redhead's cheek softly before turning and heading for the stage. Luke fell in stride with her soon after.

"What's going on with that?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder where Chloe stood.

Beca shrugged. "I don't even know."

"You-you actually like her, don't you?"

"Well, duh, Luke. She's hot."

"No, I mean, you _like_ her like her."

"What are you? A middle school girl?"

"Seriously, B."

"I don't know. I mean, she lives upstate, goes to school, probably doesn't have time for anything more than this casual weekend thing."

"Have you asked her?"

"Well, no, but-"

"Then maybe you should before you get to assumptions."

"Yeah, sure. Right now, I have a set to attend to."

When she arrived behind the stage, Jay-Z shook her hand. Rihanna was there too, and she hugged the DJ with a kiss on the cheek. They entered the A/V trailer to check sounds and levels, and Luke fetched Beca's laptop from the back of the warehouse where they had dropped it off earlier. Beca pulled up the software and the setlist, going over it once more to make sure everything was in order. Even in her intoxicated state, she was able to completely concentrate on each task at hand. Her body still tingled faintly, but she was on the perfect level. When the run through was completed, they could hear the music up front fade out and the emcee come on the mic. Jay-Z, Beca and his team made their way to the wings of the stage, Beca going up first to get behind the decks. She donned a custom white tanktop with the ROC logo on the chest and lengthy camo shorts with matching Chucks. Jay-Z and his crew wore similar apparel, and it was no secret they meant business tonight as headliners.

"Now, are we ready for tonight's headliner?" the emcee asked the crowd, who roared in affirmative. "Alright, alright. The ROC is doin' it big tonight! They have hitters back here, so first and foremost, bring 'em out, bring 'em out! Jigga and DJ Titanium B!"

Beca raised her hands, stepping onto the raised platform so that the crowd could see her, and Jay-Z stepped onto the stage, his Louie sunglasses remaining on his face in the night. He took the microphone from the emcee.

"What up, West Coast!" the CEO hollered, and there was yelling all around. "Thanks for having us! Man, I'm out here tryin' to make the best impression, so I brought out this good friend of mine, the king of the west coast decks I can assure you. What up, Titanium B?"  
"Let's get it started," she returned into her own microphone.

"Oh, she ready! Ya'll are in trouble! Well then, drop the beat, DJ!"

With that, she scratched the record before his first song began. He flowed beautifully to the cut of "D.O.A." or "Death of Auto-Tune", and Beca bobbed her head excitedly. She loved the cut. It was fitting for all that she felt towards the general concept of auto-tune, of taking something and tweaking it beyond recognition in order for it to fit in with the rest of the industry puppets. Jay had made his view on the matter known with this one, and it had been his hottest verse in a long time. It was forever on Beca's prime playlists for her own personal listening pleasure.

After a few more fresh cuts from the man on his own, Beca made her presence known on the mic. The song started off with the DJ on the hook, and she reigned it in slow and mellow. "Forever Young" was always the primary sing-along track for any Jay-Z performance, and she stepped out from her booth to shake the big man's hand and sing alongside him. The crowd was going wild, many of them in tears as they belted out the lyrics of the timeless sample seamlessly mixed with Jay-Z's supreme New York flow. They faded it out nicely before Jay started with "A Star is Born", and he gladly allowed Beca in to take a freestyle. The music froze, and he urged her to do so, but she shook her head. Then the crowd was chanting her name, and with a smirk, she dropped a nice verse just like old times, unable to deny them.

_And could I be a star? _

_Does fame in this game have to change who you are? _

_Or could I be the same one who came from a far away life_

_Just to make it in this broadway lights _

_Now I'm shinin in the broad, day-light - go figure _

_A slow transition from a lil' broke kid out in Atlanta Brave, but_

_Got a deal, a real life saver _

_Dreams of being behind the wheel like, Jada _

_I chill now, cop a lil' ice later _

_Cole, you got a glow like a lil' Lightsaber _

_So, clap for him, then applaud Jigga _

_He gave 'em a platform _

_Flow so sick thought he wrote the rap for him - no sir _

_The flow cold as a shoulder of a gold diggin hoe_

_When a broke dude approaches _

_Told ya I'm focused man, I'll let you muh'fuckers soak it in_

_Clap for him_

One last chorus, and then the two big songs now had their time. The first was "Run This Town" where Beca would take the last verse, and after the freestyle, she felt the love and passion for hip-hop descend upon her heart like an avalanche. She was all geared up for it now, and she wanted it more than anything. Everyone just about fainted when Rihanna sauntered onto the stage singing the chorus, and she made it a show to throw an arm over Beca who was back behind the decks working the beat. She planted a kiss on the DJ's cheek before stepping to the front of the stage with Jay-Z. The man came in with his verse effortlessly, blowing them all away with his devil-may-care attitude and cool, calm flow. He took the first two verses then Rihanna came to the forefront with a repeat of the chorus as Beca jumped from behind the decks onto the stage once more. They all knew her verse was coming. It was the verse that had made her a staple in the rap industry to begin with, letting all know that the alt white girl with the mad lib beats could spit. Well.

_It's crazy how you can go from being Joe Blow_

_Everybody want ya for ya own promo_

_I bought my whole family whips, no Volvos_

_Next time I'm in church, please no photos_

_Police escorts_

_Everybody passports_

_This the life that everybody ask for_

_This a fast life_

_We are on a crash course_

_What you think I rap for_

_To push a fucking Rav 4?_

_But I know that if I stay stun-ting_

_All these girls only gonna want one thing_

_I could spend my whole life good will hunting_

_Only good gon' come is as good when I'm cumming_

_She got an ass that'll swallow up a g-string_

_And up top, unh..._

_Two bee stings_

_And I'm beasting_

_Off the riesling_

_And my boy just made it out the precinct_

_We give a damn about the drama that you do bring_

_I'm just tryin' to change the color on your mood ring_

_Reebok_

_Baby_

_You need to drop some new things_

_Have you ever had shoes without shoe strings?_

**_[Rihanna]_**

_What's that B?_

**_[Beca]_**

_Baby, these heels_

_Is that a may?_

_What?!_

_Baby, these wheels_

_You trippin' when you ain't sippin'_

_Have a refill_

_You feelin' like you runnin', huh?_

_Now you know how we feel_

The applause that followed this was sure to rupture a few eardrums during its run. Beca had not felt so alive in many moons, and as she looked over the crowd, she caught a glimpse of red hair and blue eyes intently locked on her. She gave a smile then returned to the show at hand as "On to the Next One" came on. This had been her and Jay's claim to rebirth. "Run This Town" had been the greatest rap/sung collaboration of the year, but "On To The Next One" was a song made for kings, for leaders, for hustlers and that of the like. It was a track that inflicted so much arrogance that it could not be ignored, and having Beca on the track? Made it immortal.

_YOU'RE RHYMES ARE CLICHE, DELIVERY IS LIFELESS_

_WRITIN OR FREESTYLIN, MY LYRICS ARE TIMELESS_

_I AINT TRIPPIN NEVER SLIPPIN, I GOT GOOD TRACTION_

_YOU STILL ROUND ROBBIN, IM IN THE FINAL FOUR BRACKET_

_BULLDOZER, I COME OFF THE LOT AND DO DAMAGE_

_LISTEN TO THE LABELS, THEY SAY B'S A SAVAGE_

_THE ATOMIC BOMB, THE DON, RHYME KILLA_

_HEAD SPLITTER, THE INFAMOUS CYANIDE SPITTA!_

_THE JACK OF ALL TRADES, B THE ALL AMERICAN_

_FROM CALI OUT TO MARYLAND, FLAMED UP LIKE A TERRAPIN_

_WANT A CHICK? PICK ONE, GET THE LIST, CHECK ONE_

_BLESS BABYGIRL THEN "ON TO THE NEXT ONE"_

_SMOKIN AS IF I COULD JUST GO ON TO THE NEXT LUNG_

_SPITTIN FIRE AS IF I CAN GO, ON TO THE NEXT TONGUE!_

_REBEL, LEAVE THE CREW AND CLICK UP WITH A LEGION_

_YOU RUN YOUR CITY? I RUN THE WHOLE REGION!_

When Beca finished her verse, she could no longer hear herself. Most had been rapping the verse along with her, and they broke into howling applause on the last line. Her emotions had come pouring out over the words, each one dripping with relentless passion, something that had been long removed from her musical stylings as a whole. Yet tonight, on this storied stage, Beca was revived. She had been brought back from the dead, and no one in attendance tonight could deny that fact. Jay-Z quickly embraced her, shouting to the crowd to give it up for her over and over again. Rihanna kissed her cheek again, an arm slung around her shoulders as well as Jay-Z's. She had been in the background dancing and harmonizing with each chorus and bridge. The performance was one to remember, a monumental set even for such a prestigious and historical festival such as Coachella. There were fellow artists everywhere letting their cool facades slip away as they whooped and hollered for the trio on stage like normal nostalgic fans. Everyone who was anyone found some sort of inspiration from Jay-Z whether it be as a rapper or a businessman. He was one of the biggest names in hip-hop aside from Diddy, and it wasn't even mainly for his own music. It was for the breeding of stars everyday at his label and Def Jam as a whole.

"Yo, B!" he hollered as they clamored off stage. "I'll be in LA Monday. If you keep doing that, we might be able to put Bella Records under the Def Jam umbrella."

Beca's eyes bulged. Def Jam was hip-hop's largest label, and one of the powerhouses in music in its entirety. They housed many of the greats and their smaller labels. To be a Def Jam artist or label was to be one of the elite. It was one of staggering relaxation and ridiculous standards, but if you made it in, you would become a titan in music altogether.

"Seriously?" she blurted, unable to hold the question.

"Hell yeah, Little B!" he chuckled. "You tore it up out there! Did you hear that crowd during your verses? They just about broke the sound barrier, baby! They loved you, and we can definitely make it so much bigger than this. I wanna talk to Cynthia Rose and see what she thinks, but I know that if you can keep making hits and breeding those artists over at Bella, we could be a powerhouse team, ya feel me?"

"Yeah, I feel you."

"Okay, thanks again for coming out. You good for next weekend too?"

"Uh, yeah, of course."

"Nice. I'll be in touch then. We out!"

She watched the man and his entourage head towards his bus as the crowd began to clear out. She was frozen in her tracks, unable to tear her eyes away from the most powerful CEO in the business. Jay-Z had the label, Def Jam's umbrella, his clothing line, his cologne line and Beyonce for crying out loud. Never in a million years had Beca ever seen herself working on a project with the guy much less going into full-time business with him. It was definitely time for her return to her musical roots, her basic foundation, and she had never been more ready to get back to work than she was at that very movement. When she at last escaped her trance, she pulled her phone out quickly.

"Hey, Becs," Aubrey answered, Beca noticing that exhaustion was only slightly concealed by excitement for the call.

"He-he wants to talk to CR about getting under the Def Jam umbrella," she breathed.

Aubrey was wide awake then. "What!?"

"He's gonna go discuss with her Monday. Bree, you should have seen this."

"I did."

Beca's eyes bulged. That voice had not only been on the phone. She turned around to find her sister and Cynthia Rose standing there with Luke, Jesse, Ashley and Chloe. She allowed a goofy grin to fall across her face as she hung up. She then immediately tackled her sister onto the lawn in a hug, an act that took a whole lot of bubbled up excitement to become inevitable. Aubrey chuckled before tossing her little sister off and standing up. Beca followed.

"What are you doing here?" the DJ said breathlessly now.

"Well, the contracts got finished early," Aubrey explained, "and _everyone _was calling CR and I about last night's performance. They told us it was your best ever, and we knew tonight would be bigger, so we came down with Jay-Z's associates. We couldn't miss it."

"Kid, that-that's why I signed you!" Cynthia Rose gushed now, still in awe. "That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Z-Trip was standing back behind us, and he couldn't even deny it was ill. You killed it tonight, and that's why you're my go-to, you know. Now, if we can get under Def Jam, we're gonna be in business for real! I'm so proud of you."

"Thanks," Beca replied, stealing a quick glance at Chloe before looking up again. "Um, oh. Bree, CR, this is Chloe. She's one of our-good fans. Chloe, this is my big sister Aubrey and my label CEO Cynthia Rose."

"Oh, I know who you are," Chloe assured CR. "Your work is amazing as well."

"Thank you," Cynthia Rose replied, shaking the redhead's hand after Aubrey let it go with a tentative look in her eyes, causing Beca to roll hers.

"It's nice to meet you too, Aubrey," Chloe added quickly, catching the look.

"Same here," Aubrey replied, but the tone betrayed the words.

"Don't mind her," Beca chuckled. "Protective big sister."

"Very protective," Jesse now interjected.

"Yeah, I had never been so scared in my life when I got 'the talk'," Ashley added, shuddering at the memory. "It works though. Trust me."

"Well, I got us a bar down here waiting for us," CR sighed. "Let's go."

The truth was that Aubrey didn't have to worry about Chloe, not one bit. Nope, not a pinch because although Beca and the redhead enjoyed the rest of the weekend on cloud nineteen with Chloe's potent concoction, Beca never pictured Monday morning to play out the way it did. On Sunday, Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg unleashed their big surprise, a hologram of the late and great Tupac that sounded just like the original artist as he rapped his verses on hits and spoke to the crowd. The two legends also gave a shout-out to Beca and Jay-Z, and so did the Weeknd and even AVICII, giving his own props to the DJ. Beca had been over the moon with excitement, yet, after another night of great music, cold drinks, hot sex, and the highest of highs, Beca woke up in Chloe's hotel room. Alone. Her eyes fluttered open, hand reaching over for the other body that was expected to be beside her, but she was only met with cold sheets. She bolted upright in bed, looking all around for the redhead, but she was nowhere to be found. In fact, all of her luggage was gone, and all that there was on the pillow beside Beca was a plastic bag filled with green nuggets and a note that read "Stay on that cloud. xoxo." There wasn't even a phone number or anything, and Beca could only gape at the post-it note for a long while. She knew she shouldn't be so worked up about this, but the truth was that she was devastated. She believed that they had spent a marvelous weekend together, but it seemed that the redhead believed otherwise. She had really enjoyed Chloe's company and not just for the sex or the drugs, but she had never felt so used. That was _her_ thing. She would be the one to sneak out in the middle of the night and never call or kick girls out at the least instead of leaving them in her room alone. Wow, the great Beca Mitchell, who had just come back to life, felt numb once more and all because of some Berkeley redhead. She shook herself, face palming before picking up the bag. She took a closer look at the bag of weed that had been left. It was the usual dark green, but it also looked to have a tint of blue to it. This must be Chloe's secret. She sighed, breaking some up to roll a joint and vowing to have Benji take a look at it and see if he could mimic it as well. For now though, she just wanted to smoke and make up some excuse for her family that didn't sound like she had been left in bed with only a sticky note and a bag of herb.


	4. Eyes Wide Shut

**_A/N: So sorry about the wait. I have been working nonstop these days, but I had some off time today. Anyway, guys, just for the record. I do NOT condone drug use, but this song meant a lot to us when we worked on it, and it has a good vibe, and it just came out as a story in my head, so I wrote it. I appreciate the understanding. The explanation of what novocain actually is comes in now._**

* * *

_Sink full of dishes pacin' in the kitchen, cocaine for breakfast, yikes_

_Bed full of women, flip on a tripod, little red light on shootin', I'm feelin' like_

_Stanley Kubrick, this is some visionary shit_

_Been tryna film pleasure with my eyes wide shut but it keeps on movin'_

_I blame it on the model broad with the Hollywood smile_

_Stripper booty with the rack like wow, I'll never forget ya_

_You put me on a feelin' I never had, never had, never had_

_And ever since I've been tryna get it back, pick it up and put it back_

_Now I'm somethin' like the chemist on campus_

_But there's no drug around, quite like what I found in you_

_I still can't feel my face, what am I smokin' anyway_

_She said don't let the high go to waste but can you taste a little taste of_

* * *

"You're serious?"  
"Dead serious, B. This is the real thing."  
"You're telling me that she used actual Novocain?"  
"Well, nov-a-cane. This is a synthetic version of the drug. You said she was studying to be a dentist, right?"  
"Yeah."  
"Well, dentists use novocain to numb the mouth before procedures. This novacane is like a street knockoff, but it's high price stuff, you know."  
"How much."  
"A couple thousand a bottle."  
"Seriously?"  
"Yeah."  
"Can you do it though?"  
"Oh, yeah, I can do it for sure."  
"Okay, I'll drop the cash off later, cool?"  
"Sure. I'm gonna keep looking into it. See what else I need, but it'll be a bit of time for it to be ready, so I suggest you just lace the normal stuff with some and preserve, you know?"  
"Got it. Thanks, Ben."  
"No problem."

Beca patted the boy's shoulder before picking up her keys and exiting his apartment. It had been a busy two weeks since that Coachella weekend with the redhead, and Beca could not erase those bright azure eyes and red hair from her mind for the life of her. She had been backed up and busy with so many new clients and contract proposals coming in, and her and Ben had only talked over the phone about what she wanted done for her new high. She had just given him the sample, and she could not believe that Chloe had really given her this novacane stuff. Her regular weed was no longer doing the job for her. She needed the high to keep her functioning, but Beca was only glad the redhead hadn't laced it with heroin or anything. That would have been the cherry on top of the depression that Chloe had brought on. In fact, the only way Beca had confirmed that the gorgeous Berkeley student's presence in her life for those few days was real were the many headlines and photos of the two together in the major magazine and newspaper articles. Of course with her making a comeback came the major publicity, and Chloe had been caught in the crossfire of it. Still, the headlines had not even picked up her name, so it gave Beca no information that she could use to find the redhead. Then again, the girl had left. She most likely didn't want be found.

Beca arrived down at Bella Records half an hour after leaving Benji's, picking up dinner on the way and eating it quickly then taking her usual smoke, lightly laced with what she had titled "Deep Blue". She was to meet their new artist today and get started on working on a concept for his first project. Luke had really been enthralled with the kid, picking him up at a small show in Pasadena. The talent agent assured CR and Beca that he was golden on a microphone. He could not only beatbox. He could flow with an amazing delivery, and his lyrics were outstanding. Luke knew that Beca could handle it and keep him at his prime because if any other label picked him up, he would surely be thrust into the life of a mindless drone or puppet of the industry. He needed someone like Beca that could bring out the raw talent and use it as a weapon. After meetings with Ne-Yo, Pink, Kendrick Lamar, YG and 2 Chains, she was really glad to be getting something fresh to work with, something that she could help develop the sound for and mold accordingly. This was where she was at her best, the initial creative stage.

She walked into the lobby, giving Lily a wave. The small Asian only puffed her lips out slightly, cheeks falling in like a fish. She had always been quite weird, but Beca liked the fact that she was quiet more often than not. She walked down to the back offices, and she saw Luke and CR in one of the conference rooms talking to a young man no older than her. He had mocha skin, raven black hair that was styled in a sort of hipster pompadour and thick black-rimmed glasses. She remembered the name Luke had given her. Donald "D-mize" Grey. She walked into the conference room, shaking the hands of her team.

"B, this is Donald or D-Mize," Luke introduced. "Donald, this is-"

"DJ Titanium B," the boy finished, standing and shaking her hand. "It's a pleasure. I watched the Coachella performance on the live stream. Paid seventy-five bucks for it, but it was worth so much more. You were phenomenal."

"Thanks," Beca returned with a chuckle, sitting beside Luke. "I like this kid already."

"Oh, you haven't heard nothin' yet," CR assured her. "Luke, play that track."

Luke quickly pressed the spacebar on his laptop keypad before him, and a hardcore, dark beat came through the speakers hooked up to it. Beca listened intently to the intro before a voice came on, singing softly. Seconds later, Donald's voice filled the room rapping fluently with each beat, all words flowing flawlessly with the percussion backing him. Beca was subconsciously bobbing her head, and the lyrics were enticing. She was getting excited now. When the song finally ended, her eyes were illuminated, a glint in them that Cynthia Rose knew well. It was the same glint that had been in her eyes the first time Jay-Z walked in needing a comeback, the look she held when Frank Ocean first arrived on the scene and needed her aide. It was the look of a brilliant idea, a look that had been gone all too long.

"I can definitely work with this," she said. "You write your own stuff?"

"Yeah," Donald assured her, "but hey, I'm open to help."

"Okay, I have something I think we can work on as a trial run. Let's get in the booth."

Just six hours later, as one a.m. rolled into LA, Beca was sitting back in her chair behind the mixing board, and Donald was laying down the second and final verse of the song that they together had written, edited and sculpted into what Cynthia Rose and Luke were already deeming ingenius. Aubrey had arrived shortly after her meeting with the heads of MGM Grand in Las Vegas about a show later that summer, and even she was bobbing her head to what was flowing through the headphones around Beca's neck. When Donald at last got the verse down perfectly, he stepped out of the booth and looked at Beca with hopeful eyes.

"Okay, kid, you just need to do the hook," she sighed.

"Uh, yeah, about that," he chuckled nervously, shifting from one foot to the other. "Uh, I was wondering if-you know-you would do it."

"Me?"

"Yeah, B, I mean, you're voice is phenomenal, and with this beat you've got as dark and emotional as it is, you're scales will take it further than mine. I don't wanna rap it. I want it sung."

Beca gave him a stunned look before glancing up at her counterparts.

"He has a point, B," Cynthia Rose nodded. "And with you endorsing the song, it'll take off. I mean, these lyrics are fire. This could be a big hit right off the bat and give us some big points with the league, ya know."

Beca pondered it a moment, slowly taking the notebook that Donald handed to her. She read the chorus over and over, and without another word, she stood up. Luke instinctively took the seat in front of the large mixing console, and she walked into the booth, pulling on the headphones draping from the microphone. Luke met her gaze, and she gave him a nod. He then started the song. It took her a few runs, but when she was finally warmed up, the sound that emanated from the booth was enchanting. Aubrey was slack-jawed, eyes wide in awe. Cynthia Rose was moving to the music, eyes shut tight as she fell under the spell. They could swear that Luke's eyes were glossy as he sat leaning over the console, and Donald was in his own state of shock at just how beautiful the little DJ's voice was. Never had she taken the pitch this high. Never had it been so passionate. Her voice could be compared to delicate and fragile porcelain, the beauty leaving you rigid but not wanting it to fall in fear of it shattering to pieces. It was the kind of sound you wished to lock away forever, keeping it safe from external hindrance or alteration. What they in the control room were not aware of was exactly what Beca was seeing behind closed eyelids. She was picturing deep blue and vivid red cast in an ice blue haze, smoke alone separating the DJ from her deepest desire. However, she could not reach past it. What had that redhead done to her?

When she faded out the final note, Beca opened her own eyes to take in the looks on her team's faces. She too was struck by the sound, and she stepped out of the booth. No one said anything as she took her chair back and began to mix. Two more hours passed of utter and anxious silence, and she at last turned around to face them. They waited with bated breath as she pressed play in order to hear the project in full, and then Beca's voice filled the room, sending chills down everyone's spine, the slow bass like the heartbeat of the ominous piano during the second stanza.

**_Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth_**

**_You're the only one that wants me around_**

**_And I can think of a thousand reasons why_**

**_I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I_**

**_Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth_**

**_You're the only one that wants me around_**

**_And I can think of a thousand reasons why_**

**_I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I_**

_Go ahead and fill my drink up, you'll still be all I think of_

_We tryna stay afloat, but know the weight'll sink us_

_I say the problem's solved once you forget the question_

_But you go ask again 'cause you ain't learned your lesson_

_And to the heavens I promise you no regret_

_For my mind's left in the past so that promise was never kept_

_To be honest I fell astray - call it lost on the way_

_So certain of my intentions, I thought that I'd never sway_

_But between the cameras flashing, I guess that it had to happen_

_The negatives to the perfect picture, I had to have them_

_And my collection consists of all that I had to take_

_We celebrating the sacrifices we had to make_

_We had to wait, unprepared for the loss_

_Over sold on the win and unaware of the cost_

_'Cause I can write a song but can't unwrite my wrongs_

_I guess you live and learn, learn when the love is gone_

**_Li-li-li-li-light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth_**

**_You're the only one that wants me around_**

**_And I can think of a thousand reasons why_**

**_I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I_**

_Now here we are again, back from our darkest end_

_We'll keep this happiness going 'long as we all pretend_

_It seems we built this from nothing but broken dreams_

_These memories we'll forget but that's all that we hope to see_

_I got my future in this ticket, life is yours if you live it_

_You wish you could plan it different but fuck it, that's how you miss it_

_I always hoped you would visit, always thought it was you_

_Always caught in the past 'cause it's all that I fucking knew_

_I mean, it's funny, ain't it? Guess it's all how you paint it_

_It's all that I really got, but it's all for the entertainment_

_The champagne's on the dresser, empty from all my efforts_

_The life of yesterday's party gets carried off on a stretcher_

_And here we standing like everything's how we planned it_

_But who're we kidding? We drinking so we don't panic_

_Drunk off that lucky 7, go ahead and tell the reverend_

_We fuckin' rock stars - call us Left Deopard_

**_Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth_**

**_You're the only one that wants me around_**

**_And I can think of a thousand reasons why_**

**_I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I_**

There were tears in the eyes of the Cynthia Rose and Aubrey. They did not fall, but the water welled up to the brim. Luke's jaw was on the floor, eyes glazed over. Donald was stunned beyond explanation, and Beca's breath had hitched. No one knew what to say. The fact was that Beca had created this track in less than a day including the instrumental, the lyrics and the recording. Usually, this process took at least a week. No, however. The quality would cause anyone to assume it had, but Beca had in fact orchestrated it in about eight hours. Even now, at three in the morning, the buzz of energy was evident.

"That was-amazing!" Cynthia Rose at last breath. "That-wow. That's definitely a hit. Do you two realize what you just did?"  
Beca and Donald both grinned but voiced no response.

"Beca, can you have the mastering done by Friday morning?" the CEO asked now.

"Definitely," Beca replied now.

"Good. Great job, guys. I'll see you Thursday morning. We have an album to plan."

The team nodded and left the control room, leaving only Beca and Aubrey behind. Aubrey knew there was something different about the brunette, but she couldn't pinpoint what exactly it was. However, Beca had seemed genuinely happy during the Coachella weekend she spent with the redhead, and since they had left home Monday, she had not uttered a word regarding her. Had the other woman done something or said something to Beca? Had she refused to keep in touch? Aubrey didn't understand, but neither her or her sister were the type to push for emotional details or offer them willingly, so Aubrey kept it generic and vague.

"How are you feeling?" she asked the younger woman.

"Good. I feel great," Beca replied quickly with a nod.

"That's good. That track is phenomenal."

"Yeah, it's all finally coming back to me. Thanks, Bree, for suggesting the trip."

"No problem. Speaking of the trip, have you talked to that-redhead."

Beca froze for a split second before quickly recovering. "Uh, no, but-uh, she had an internship starting soon. She's gonna be a dentist, so yeah."

"Oh, okay. How's Jesse?"

"He's good. He misses you though."

"Yeah, I miss him too. We should have dinner tomorrow."

"Yeah, that works."

"Okay, we'll work out details tomorrow. Good night."

"Night."

Beca hurried out of the control room before her sister asked anymore questions. She could see the desire to do so in the blonde's emerald eyes, sharp the way their mother's had once been but still so soft all at once. Beca knew how Aubrey felt about any woman that the DJ was associated with. She definitely had never been open to Stacie since first meeting her at the winter Victoria's Secret show that Beca DJed at so long ago. However, though Chloe had sure as hell not earned any entitlement to respect or liking from the blonde or even Beca, the DJ still felt compelled to protect the redhead from the wrath of her big sister Aubrey Posen, a wrath that would reach to the depths of Berkeley if necessary and stick a drill through an aspiring dentist's throat.

When she arrived home at four, Beca was not all too surprised to see the familiar blue Corvette comfortably parked in her driveway. This brought on the usual smirk, but for the first time in a long time, she actually felt herself become excited for the impromptu visit. She took a few more hits of the joint in her hand, intensifying the high as much as possible so as to be ready for a night with the busty model, before stepping out of her car, body tingling faintly as she tossed the roach in the can and stepped inside. The blue Corvette was not surprising, no. The fact that there was more than one Victoria's Secret angel in her home at the moment was a bit surprising however. She entered the kitchen to find three curvy blondes and a thick brunette around the counter. She knew them from the fashion show, and she could easily recall every curve and crevice regardless of the obstructing clothing now in place. One of the blondes, the taller one with electric blue eyes and bouncy curls at the end of each lock, looked up at her and smiled.

"Hey, B," she greeted coyly.

"Hey, Heidi," Beca returned cautiously. "What's going on here?"

"Oh, we were just having some drinks with Jesse and Benji. Stacie's upstairs waiting on you. I think she was talking to J."

"Oh, okay."

"You want some breakfast?"

The tall blonde gestured to the countertop, and it was only then that Beca noticed the several powdery white lines streaking across it. The brunette, Lina, was about to bend over one of them, a tightly rolled up dollar bill in her hand, poised to filter the powder into her system. Now Beca was not against anyone who preferred the nose candy, but she had seen firsthand the effects of it. Her father had sold it many times, on some occasions leaving his small daughter and son at some junkie's house as collateral while he picked up the drugs, and Beca had only found that out years after he was taken into prison. The news had been given to her mother, and the small brunette had overheard when the police informed the older Mitchell that one of the junkies had come forth to say so. It had made Beca sick the way it had made her mother sick, and her mother had already been sick from her treatment therefore making nausea's job much easier. Beca had been thirteen at the time. Sure, she had sold weed, but she would never touch anything bigger than that, especially in powder form. She looked back up at Heidi now, intent on not offending the girls but expressing her disdain.

"Cocaine for breakfast?" Beca asked, trying not to sound so distasteful. "Yikes."

"It gets the day started," Heidi insisted.

"I'm good. Thanks, girls."

She waved to them once more before making her way up to her room. She could hear the low voices of Stacie and her brother, but she could not make out a word they were saying. She stood by the door a moment to see if they would clear up a bit, but when they did not, she stepped in and made her presence known. They immediately stopped talking as Stacie squealed with excitement and rushed over to hug Beca. She had not seen the girl since before Coachella, and though the model would never admit it aloud, she dearly missed the DJ more than she knew she should.

"Hey, B," she husked, kissing at Beca's earlobe.

"Hey, Stace," Beca replied, hands bracketing the taller woman's hips.

"How was work today?"

"It was good. Really good. We got our new artist today. Hey, J."

Jesse stepped over now as Stacie stepped back, leaving room for the twins to bump fists.

"What's up, B?" he replied with a grin. "It's late, you know."

She rolled her eyes. "Sorry, Little Bro, duty calls. Where's Ben?"

"He took off already, but he did say he would call you tomorrow."

"Oh, okay. Cool."

The room fell silent a moment as Beca placed her laptop case atop her desk, oblivious to the devilish grins that were being swapped behind her between the other two brunettes. Jesse gave Stacie a wink, bumping her fist before leaving the room. Stacie gave a quick look around the room, namely the dresser right in front of the bed, and smiled to herself. Beca had shed her button-up and shoes by now, and Stacie moved over to pull off her tanktop.

"Easy there," Beca smirked as Stacie moved to unbutton her jeans.

"It's been too long," Stacie countered, pushing them down Beca's slender legs.

"I guess it has been."

"I have a surprise for you."

Stacie then reached into her pocket and pulled out a little white pill, holding it out in front of the smaller woman with a smile. Beca cocked an eyebrow. Once again, she didn't touch anything apart from weed. It had always been so, and Stacie knew that because Stacie had offered pills before. The taller brunette did not indulge in cocaine or any of that either, but she did let loose with pills every once in a great while when she wanted to have a good time and feel weightless. She figured this may work on Beca and bring her little bedroom devil back.

"What's this, Stace?" she asked firmly. "You know I don't-"

"B, it's not gonna kill you or anything," she scoffed. "It's a simple energy boost. I want the old Beca back."

"I think she came back from Coachella."

"Really?"

"Well, yeah."

Stacie's eyebrow flew up after a beat of silence. "Wait, did you-"

"Did I...what?" Beca's eyebrows rose now.

"Did you sleep with someone up there?" Stacie used a knowing smile to hide the anxiety now.

Beca smirked. "Have you not seen the headlines?"

"They show you with some girl, B. It doesn't say that you fucked her."

"Well, yeah, we did."

Stacie had to hold back the bubbling jealousy. "So you-were the old Beca again?"

Beca still could make out the emotion in the model's eyes and quickly moved along. "Yeah, but I think it had a lot to do with the new weed I-found out there. I smoked some earlier."

"So you don't think you'll need this?"

Beca at last looked up to meet hazel green eyes, and though Stacie had done everything in her power to hide all emotion towards this new information, Beca saw through it. She saw pleading, and though she only saw Stacie as beneficial, she hated making people feel bad, so she gently tugged the taller woman closer and growled, causing Stacie's eyes to just about roll back. It was the next action however that had her breathless. Beca pressed her lips to Stacie's now in a passionate and slow kiss. This never happened. They had kissed before here and there but never when Stacie was fully clothed, never away from the bed, never outside of breathless moans and pants. This was different, and Stacie had no idea what to make of it. One part of her was freaking out. One part of her was passing out. As for Beca, she could not explain what she had just done. One part of her felt the need to let Stacie know she was special. One part of her was envisioning a bubbly redhead in a Pocahontas costume. Overall however, Beca wanted something more than she had ever had. She just couldn't pinpoint it, but she wanted Stacie in so many different ways at that current moment.

"Let's go one round," Beca whispered. "One round, and if I don't perform, I'll take it, okay?"

Stacie had no chance to reply before she was being tossed onto the bed, clothes being ripped off quickly. She let out a yelp when she saw the fire and desire in the stormy blue eyes above her. It was a look she had been waiting on. She did not like the idea that someone else had seen this look again before her, that she had not been the one to cure whatever had been wrong with the DJ, but she could not dwell on it right now because Beca's high from earlier was turning her into that same animal she had been months ago, the same animal she had become when entering Chloe's hotel room, but she would not tell Stacie that. Her body tingled. Physically, she was numb. She did not feel Stacie's perfect nails penetrate the skin of her back, breaking the skin easily. She did not feel the angel's mile-long legs nearly strangle her when she began kissing around her sex teasingly. She did not feel those nails then dig into her scalp as they clawed through chocolate tresses. What she could feel was the rising fire in the pit of her stomach, the heated throbbing between her own thighs, the lust-filled haze distorting her mind. She came back up swiftly, and though she had originally planned to tease the model until she screamed for mercy, Beca could no longer stand the wait. She was inside of Stacie in seconds, and Stacie could not fight off the resounding moans being elicited. It had been so long since she had felt Beca like this, alive and aroused. Beca had no idea that Stacie had not slept with anyone else in such a long time, and Stacie would never tell her because admitting it aloud would scare the hell out of them both. Besides, there was no way to explain it because the taller brunette had refused to even acknowledge it much less explain it to herself. Now, as she indulged herself in this moment of pure ecstasy, she couldn't help but wonder if this was all she would ever get out of Beca.

One round turned into several rounds which turned into a dozen rounds. At one point, Beca did take the pill but only because her high was wearing off but another drug seemed like the best way to preserve her golden stash. This had created a monster for sure. At some point, no one would ever know how, Stacie wasn't the only angel in Beca's bed. The other four had trumped in high as a kite and intending to get in on the action. They had for awhile, and Beca had been enthused by the bed full of women, but Stacie soon snapped out of her clouded state and shooed them out. Heidi knew how bad Stacie had it for the DJ though no one would ever voice it, so despite her cocaine-infused mind, she had obeyed and taken the others with her.

By seven in the morning, Beca was out cold, but the difference now was that Stacie had not even thought about leaving. She was nestled into the brunette's side, the DJ laying on her stomach with her arm thrown haphazardly over the model's waist. Her head was turned and resting atop Stacie's, and the angel could not help but grin at the scene. She eventually succumbed to the exhaustion coursing through her body, the drugs waring off, and she fell into a pleasant slumber.

A few hours later, Stacie awoke. Beca had turned over in that time onto her back, but she had still kept close to the other woman. Stacie smiled before slyly sliding out of bed, moving over to the dresser below the flat screen across from the bed. She gingerly picked up the small video recorder. It had cut off two hours ago, but it had lasted the entirety of their _reunion_. It had been a silly hypothetical conversation between the model and the younger twin, but after a few shots and a pill or two, both Stacie and Jesse were dead serious and dead set on carrying out the plot. Jesse had offered his camera, and Stacie had put in her memory card to record it on. She had been planning on giving Beca the pill, and for her own personal pleasure, she had hoped to catch the revival of the beast on tape. It would hold her over on nights without the DJ both physically and mentally. She had never expected it to work out so well however. Beca had been everything she once was and more, and Stacie had been pulled to her, drawn to her all over again. She completely ignored the nagging question of what exactly that meant in the back of her mind. She just hoped this redhead was out of the picture and was nothing more than a weekend funhouse.

Stacie slid her memory card into her purse before sliding back into the sheets with Beca, an act she had never before gone ahead with. She never stayed this long. She never actually slept over. However, she felt the need to. Beca instinctively pulled the other woman in closer with an arm around her midsection, and Stacie grinned. She closed her eyes, and as she drifted off to sleep, she heard the smaller brunette mumble something.

"Chloe."

Stacie only smiled because both women would interpret that one word in two completely different ways. Stacie was glad that Beca, though asleep, could identify what perfume she was currently wearing. Beca on the other hand was dreaming of ice blue eyes and fiery red hair.


	5. Intoxicated Words are Sober Misfortunes

**_A/N: So let's fast forward two years. The sex and drugs slow down significantly, but the drama ensues because, you know, two years can change many things, but I cannot change true love. Therefore, partners and true loves come together to form a bit of drama surely, right? Right_**

* * *

_A tornado flew around my room before you came_

_Excuse the mess it made, it usually doesn't rain_

_In Southern California, much like Arizona_

_My eyes don't shed tears, but, boy, they bawl_

_When I'm thinkin' 'bout you_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you_

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you_

_Do you think about me still?_

_Do ya, do ya?_

_Or do you not think so far ahead_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever_

* * *

"I don't wanna go!" she whined.

"Either you go, or you stay in pain forever, and I'm tired of your grumbling to be honest."

"But, Bree-"

"B, they get you high as a kite. You like that right? It costs as much as your special weed too."

Beca scowled at the blonde for a brief moment before returning to her toddler pout. Stacie, who was sitting beside her, ruffled her hair with a smile.

"I'll walk you in, and I'll be there to pick you up," the taller brunette offered shyly.

Beca turned on her, eyes hopeful. "Promise?" she asked.

Stacie giggled. "Yes, I promise, little one."

Aubrey sighed in exasperation. "You are such a six-year-old, I swear."

"Bree, this is serious!" Beca scolded. "It's like-like getting teeth pulled!"

"It _IS_ getting teeth pulled!" both of the other women corrected.

"Right."

The DJ had been in pain for weeks, and though she had not planned to tell her sister or Stacie, they had sort of figured it out while she was laying vocals for a new song with Rihanna. She had never had her wisdom teeth pulled, and she never wanted to. However, the pain had become unbearable. It was evident when she would eat, sing, and even sleep. Stacie would feel her toss and turn beneath the sheets while she groaned, and she knew something had to be done.

In the last two years, Beca had gone from a struggling DJ to the world's most prolific artist. She had worked on full albums with Kendrick Lamar, Frank Ocean once more, Rihanna, Calvin Harris, a country singer named Luke Bryan, Donald and a slew of others. She had also done several multi-platinum singles with David Guetta. Her own album had topped the charts, and in only six months, it had gone five times platinum, selling over five million records across the world. Ever since that fateful Coachella Festival two years prior, she had come back to her fruitful self though her smoking habits had slowed since Benji had successfully created the batch of her "Deep Blue" which gave her a high that lasted longer than anything she had ever had. Even her love life seemed to make sense. Kinda. Sometimes.

Her relationship with Stacie was not official, but they had become undoubtedly closer, as close to lovers as either had ever been, and they had only slept with each other for the last year. They went places together now and not just Beca's bedroom. They made headlines all of the time. Beca actually kissed Stacie on the lips softly before bed, and Stacie did stay the night with the DJ more often than not. Aubrey had even learned to tolerate and eventually take a liking to the brunette. She could now see what lay behind the Victoria's Secret lingerie and coy smile. It was a caring woman that only wanted what was best for Beca. That was obvious right now as Stacie tried relentlessly beside Aubrey to get Beca to go to the dentist and get her wisdom teeth pulled. The truth in Stacie's mind was that Beca loved her the way Stacie loved Beca, but neither of them were savvy to admit it. The truth in Beca's mind? Well, she had fallen in love two years ago, but since she could not have the recipient of her most prized affections, she had settled for the one who had always been around, Stacie Conrad.

"I've set up the appointment for Friday with Dr. Hoffman," Aubrey went on once Beca turned back to focus on her with a defeated expression. "Two o'clock. Be on time, Becs, please."

"Oh, she will be," Stacie quickly assured her. "Even if I have to drag her."

Aubrey grinned, sitting back in the chair she occupied across from them. They now only awaited Jesse, Benji and Ashley for dinner in the elegant restaurant, and soon enough, the three came in rather quickly. With Jesse working over at Warner Brothers, Ashley being his assistant and manager, he usually ran late for dinners now. They understood. Beca had missed events altogether working late over the last couple of years. Jesse greeted his sisters then everyone else exchanged pleasantries before settling in. The waitress was there in seconds to take their orders, Beca agreeing to autograph a napkin, and the conversation began.

"What movie are you working on again?" Aubrey asked her little brother.

"Oh, uh, Percy Jackson and the Olympians," he returned proudly. "The fourth one."

"Wow, that's amazing. Weren't you in the first movie, Stace?"

"Yeah," Stacie chuckled. "I had just started out, and it was only a small part. I was on screen for maybe twelve seconds, but nonetheless, it somehow helped me get the model job, so..."

"So, B, you getting ready to work with Jigga again?" Jesse asked.

"Yeah," Beca huffed. "He has this 'Magna Carta' album, and he swears up and down it's going to outdo everything he's ever done. We just finished writing the title track with Justin Timberlake. I think he might be right if the whole album's like this."

"You know it's gonna be fire. You guys really killed that album with Kanye. It's a classic."

"Yeah, but it's always hard to outdo your best."

"But that's your specialty. You have yet to fail."

"Don't jinx me."

Jesse chuckled as their food appeared. They dug into their meals, but as soon as Beca took a bite of her lasagna, she winced in pain, the fork banging against her back tooth. Stacie immediately turned to her, handing over the tube of Orajel ointment she pulled from her purse. She had it on standby. Beca took it but made no move to put any on, assuring Stacie she was okay and continuing to eat.

"Jeez, Becs, you gotta get those pulled out," Jesse sighed.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," she muttered.

"When?"

She gave him an incredulous look. "What?"

"When are you-"

"Friday. Aubrey set an appointment for Friday with what she promises is the best dentist UCLA has to offer. I really don't care who it is though, right? I'll be asleep?"

Aubrey rolled her eyes, knowing her badass little sister wanted, _needed _reassurance.

"Yes, Becs, you'll be asleep," the blonde returned.

Beca nodded in satisfaction before turning back to her meal as he brother sniggered. She wasn't sure what else to think, but she knew it had to be done. At least Stacie would be there waiting for her. The DJ could never fully wrap her head around how safe she felt with the model present, but she decided long ago to ignore it, avoid the subject indefinitely. Both women were content in whatever they were, or weren't, and no one was complaining. Stacie was glad to be a real part of Beca's life, hanging out at the studio and having dinner with the family. It was a nice change from only being existent in the bedroom. She could actually be around Beca fully clothed. No, no one was going to complain about that.

Stacie woke Beca up at noon on Friday. She had been in the studio until five in the morning working on the production of Jay-Z's album, and she was exhausted to say the least. Stacie relentlessly shook her until she stirred then eventually sat up in bed.

"Come on, Babe," Stacie prompted. "Go get a shower. We have to get going soon. It's about thirty minutes to the dentist office, probably longer with lunchtime traffic."

"Okay," Beca huffed, her feet hitting the floor.

"I'll have coffee ready, but you can't eat yet. We don't want you puking all over the dentist. Actually, I probably shouldn't even give you coffee, so-"

She was cut off with Beca's deathly glare. "No one-deprives me of coffee, woman."

Stacie shook her head with a small smile. "Fine. Hurry up."

After a shower, Beca dressed, took the offered mug from Stacie and followed her out to the yellow Camaro. Stacie had traded in the Corvette a year ago after appearing in the fourth Transformers movie, and Beca had found it rather stylish. She herself had purchased a black Camaro that sat next to her Charger and truck in their enlarged garage. They had upgraded to a bigger home a bit closer to the studio, but she still insisted it was her loft. The upstairs loft was now a place for her and Jesse to do their home recording sessions, and it was rather lavish. She slid into the passenger seat of Stacie's car now and settled in for the ride to the dentist's office, lighting up as she did so. She sipped her coffee slowly, turning on the radio where one of the tracks she worked on by Ariana Grande was on.

"Wake up, Becs," Stacie urged, eyes still on the road.

"This is as awake as I'm getting," Beca replied. "They're putting me back to sleep anyway."

"You are so stubborn."

"Are you complaining?"

"Would I ever complain about you?"

"I'm sure you have. I'm just too tired to recall."

"Yeah, sure."

"Ugh, this banter is draining me."

"And I complain?"

"I never said you were the only one, did I?"

Stacie only smirked and continued down the street. Forty minutes later, they pulled into the parking lot of the dental office. Stacie accompanied Beca in and sat with her as she filled out the paperwork. The taller brunette gently placed a hand on Beca's bouncing knee to still it. The DJ did not look up at her, but a small smile formed on her lips. When she at last finished the paperwork and handed it to the receptionist, they settled down for the wait. Stacie filed her nails thoughtlessly while Beca tapped out a beat on her thigh.

"The fashion show's coming up, isn't it?" the DJ questioned.

"Yeah, two months," Stacie replied, not looking up. "They want you to DJ, right?"

"Yeah, Thalia called a few weeks ago."

"What are you gonna do for your birthday?"

"Well, Luke's opening up the club December tenth. That's two days before, so we decided we'll have the bash for the grand opening. Kendrick and Rihanna are coming out."

"Ooh, that should be fun."

"Yeah, it should be."

Stacie stowed her nail file away now. "I'm gonna get going, B. We have to meet with the designer in a bit, but I'll be here to pick you up, okay?"

Beca huffed, and Stacie giggled. "Okay."

She moved a stray strand of hair behind the DJ's ear. "Toughen up, champ."

The model pressed a kiss to the DJ's temple before standing and walking out of the office. Beca slumped back into her chair, fingers tapping erratically against the arm rest. At last, she heard her name called. She stood up and followed the nurse to the back rooms, settling into one of them atop a chair offered.

"The dentist will be in shortly, Miss Mitchell," the blonde assured her with a smile.

As the nurse walked out, she bumped into said dentist.

"Uh, sir, Miss Mitchell is here to have her wisdom teeth pulled," she informed the man.

"Oh, crap!" he hissed, hitting his palm to his forehead. "I have a meeting with the director right now. Uh, our newest dentist should do. Can you just send her in? She's in the lounge."

"Uh, yeah, sure."

She quickly rushed down the hall to the lounge where she found the woman.

"Excuse me," the nurse called.

"Yes, Brittany?" the dentist returned, standing from the table.

"Dr. Hoffman had to leave, and we have an extraction. Can you take it?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay, the chart and the patient are in B."

"Okay, thanks."

Beca looked around the room tentatively, faint footsteps meeting her ears from around the office. She let her fingers drum against the arm rest once more subconsciously, awaiting the arrival of her dentist in angst. She had annual checkups and cleanings, but she had never done something so drastic, and it worried her. Sure, she had an onslaught of ink all over her body, but needles and drills and that of the like inside of her mouth was quite scary and much different. She wasn't sure if she was anxious for the dentist to arrive or relieved he had yet to do so. At last, the door behind her opened.

"Okay," a sweet voice voice chirped, and Beca's heart stopped, her body freezing. "Hello, I'm Dr. Beale, and I'll be-" the woman stopped as she rounded the chair. "Beca?"

"C-Chloe?" Beca breathed out, unable to register the woman that stood before her.

It was indeed Chloe, the beautiful redhead that had haunted Beca's thoughts, dreams and music for the better part of two years. She could never forget that sweet, melodic voice, but what she was drawn to now was that pair of vivid azure eyes that held the ocean within them. Her breath hitched. Chloe looked impossibly more beautiful now. Her hair fell in waves around her sun-kissed face, lips plump and glossed, eyes behind black-rimmed glasses. The white lab coat could not hinder Beca's picture of the slender curves beneath, skin soft and smooth. This was the woman that had left Beca but had never left her alone.

"Ch-Chloe?" she repeated. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

Chloe smiled sheepishly. "Uh, I work here now."

"You-I-we-uh, wow. I didn't-"

"It was originally another dentist that was going to see you, but he had a meeting."

Beca had no idea what to say. There was a million questions running through her mind, but she couldn't bring herself to ask any of them. She was hurt yet ecstatic, angry yet relieved, and she could not hone in on any one emotion. She at last broke eye contact, disappointment flashing across her face. Chloe's cheeks were bright red now, and she quickly turned to pick up the chart and change the subject.

"Okay, so we're extracting your wisdom teeth today, correct?" the redhead asked, trying not to show how flustered she was.

"Yup," Beca mumbled, her eyes fixed on her lap.

"Okay, so let's get started, shall we? I'll explain the procedure to you first, and then-."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Can we just do it as we go please?"

"Uh, yeah, sure."

A few minutes later, Beca was slipping into unconsciousness, and she was glad of it because her brain was in overdrive, and she just wanted to escape the anxiety now coursing through her. Chloe's bubbly voice was not helping matters at all, and she needed to escape. Still however, when sleep came, all she could see was that deep blue and bright red, and she was frozen in place, just staring at the taunting figure of Chloe Beale. Meanwhile, Chloe was a nervous wreck, but she was trying so hard to concentrate on the task at hand. Never had she believed she would see this girl again, not in person anyway. She had done what she wanted to do. She had helped Beca out of her slump. She had fallen in love with the DJ's music from the beginning, and when the DJ grew quiet on the music scene, it had driven her mad. When she saw Beca at the concert, she only wanted to get her back on that level again. The Novacane had done that for her. She had been stressed over school, and the usual happy, bright, bubbly girl she knew herself as had been trapped behind restless nights and stressful days. Then she found the drug, a synthetic replica of the substance she had studied thoroughly in school. It had pulled her back, revived her, and she had only wanted to do the same for Beca. Sure, Chloe couldn't deny that she had thought about the DJ every day since. There had surely been a connection, but with her parents on her about school, with her boyfriend Tom coming into the picture shortly before she met Beca, and with the move back down to LA, it had all been too much. Tom was a doctor, the type of person her parents wanted her with, and her father, a neurosurgeon, had brought him around when she had gone down for the summer. He was a nice guy, an all-American face of perfection with a killer body from his days of rowing at UCLA. He was great, but he wasn't what Chloe needed because Tom had standards. She had to be perfect and pragmatic and politically correct at all times. She could not be the spontaneous, overly excited, no-boundary Chloe she once was as a kid. Her parents had slowly turned her into that perfect picture girl, but Tom had solidified it. She had been her old self during the weekend with Beca though, and she had loved it, but she was so scared of letting people down that she had run, and Chloe Beale never ran. The crazy part was that she let Beca down, and she didn't even know it.

Beca's eyes fluttered open, and they were met with bright light. They bulged then as she reached up into the beam with a gasp.

"Oh my God, I died!" she squealed around a mouth full of cotton. "What the-they replace my teeth with marshmallows! I made it to Heaven."

Then she heard a giggle from beside her, and she turned to see an amused redhead. She stared for a moment, registering the stunning sight before her then flopping back in the chair with a content sigh.

"Yup, definitely Heaven," she mused, and Chloe brightened.

"Now, Beca, you're going to be a bit disoriented for a few hours," the redhead began to explain once she calmed down. "You are still coming down from-"

"Novacane!" the brunette suddenly sang, eyes closed as the cotton fell from her mouth.

Chloe's eyes bulged before she giggled. "New hit single?"

Beca's eyes now popped open as she looked at Chloe once more. "That's an awesome idea! I-I'll get-someone good to sing it like, like Frankie!"

"Yeah, that would be great. Now, is someone picking you up?"

"Yeah, a-an angel is. Not an angel like, a God's angel like you, but-a Victoria's Secret angel."

Chloe blushed despite the pang of jealousy in her gut. "Oh, right. Stacie, isn't it?"

"Yeah-she-she was like the best rebound ever after you left." Beca suddenly slapped a hand over her mouth but giggled at the feeling, and Chloe was sure she would be yelping in pain for that once the drugs wore off. "Shh, that's a secret. Don't tell Chloe."

"Of course not." Chloe's heart fluttered, and she was taken aback by this information.

"I-can I stay with you a little longer? I-you need to get on this level."

"Yeah, we can give you a bit, but no, I'm fine on this level. I'm working."

"Right, right. She wanted to be a dentist really badly!" she sang again. "In school, paying tuition doing por-" Now Chloe's hand was over her mouth, cheeks red, and Beca's eyebrows shot up before they wiggled playfully. Chloe retracted her hand. "I remembered."

"I'm sure you did. So, moving on, Beca, you will have to come back in two weeks so that we can check the stitching inside of your mouth."

"What! You stitched my mouth shut! How am I s'posed to talk, Chlobear!"

Chloe's heart melted at the nickname. "Beca, the stitching's inside. You can still talk."

She sighed in relief. "Oh, oh good because you know, like, I mean the troll under the bridge will pounce the moment he finds out I can't call for help." She looked thoughtful a moment before meeting Chloe's inquisitive gaze. "You-gosh, you are like, the sun made beautiful love to the ocean, and boop! Out popped you."

Chloe giggled once more. "Okay, Beca."

"You-you haunt dreams, you know. I always dream about you, but-except for this one time. Whoo! It was scary. There was-well, a satanic pony with a fork in his hoof and he-HE TURNED ON ME!"

Chloe stifled a laugh at the fear in Beca's eyes. "Beca-"

"I-I just really want a milkshake."

"That will work. You have to get along with soft foods for a few days, okay? We have prescription waiting for you up front for the pain, and if you need anything, you can call or come back anytime, okay?"

"I-you know, well, do you make house calls?"

Before Chloe could form a response, Brittany entered the room with a smile.

"Miss Mitchell's ride is here," she informed the two curtly.

"Okay, thank you, Brittany," Chloe replied, hiding the disappointment from her face but not wishing to see Beca with the other girl. "Brittany, will you escort her out?"

"Yes, of course."

Had Beca been coherent, she would have asked for Chloe's number. She would have talked to her in a serious manner about what the hell happened at Coachella, but deep down, she was glad she wasn't coherent. Sounding desperate and hurt was not her forte. She didn't want to appear weak. She had been fine without Chloe this long. Sure, the dreams never vacated, but she was alive and kicking. She was the world's most celebrated artist, and she had done it without Chloe. Besides, Stacie was there. She had always been there. That was enough. That should be enough. It should always be enough. Right?

Brittany helped a babbling Beca out to the front lobby where Stacie awaited her. She quickly took Beca's hand with an amused grin, thanking the assistant before moving out of the building. As they approached the car, Beca froze in her tracks, voice muted.

"What's wrong, B?" Stacie asked, turning to look at her.

Beca's eyes were wide with fear as she shook an accusatory finger at the car.

"I know your secret!" she shrieked. "You can't fool me, Bumblebee!" Her voice then turned to a whisper. "Transformers. More than meets the eye."  
Stacie shook her head with a laugh. "It's not gonna eat you, B. Come on."

"Is-he a nice one?"

"Yes, very. He's an autobot, not a decepticon."

"Um, do you have documentation on that?"

"No, but I can promise you a milkshake."

"Deal!"

Stacie took her hand once more and tugged her forward, easing her into the passenger seat before going around to the driver side. They stopped at Sonic drive-thru to get a milkshake, and that alone had Beca over the moon with joy. However, it did not stop her from talking. The ride back to the house was full of Beca's babbling and a few near crashes due to the DJ's insistence on following the rainbow. What rainbow was beyond Stacie, but she allowed Beca the entertainment. At last, they arrived at the loft, and Stacie helped Beca up to bed.

"Do you think they make leather shoes in Heaven?" Beca asked sleepily, smacking her lips.

"I'm not sure, B," Stacie returned.

"I'll be sure to ask Chloe."

Stacie froze. "Chloe?"

"Yeah, my-uh, the dentist."

"Oh, okay. Sure, Babe. Go to sleep now." She stood up to leave the room.

"Wait!"

She whipped around. "What?"

"Can-uh, you just check under my pillow. I swear I can hear the smurfs plotting on me."

After a laugh, Stacie gently lifted up the pillow which Beca remained laying on. "Nope, no Smurfs, Babe. Everything's good."

"Should I-is there a special button I hit if I need you?"

"No, sweetie, but I'm right downstairs. Just yell."

"Ah, okay. I-but I-don't have any teeth."

"You have teeth, B. Just not your wisdom teeth anymore."

"What! So-I'm gonna be st-stupid!"

Stacie bit back a laugh. "For a few more hours, yeah. No, seriously, Beca, no. You won't be stupid, okay? You'll be fine. Just get some sleep, and when you wake up, you'll be wise again. I'll have some mashed potatoes ready for you and some ice cream for dessert, okay?"

"Yeah, but don't forget to invite the vikings. They get so offended when you leave them out."

"Noted."

Beca awoke around eight o'clock that evening. She could smell good cooking downstairs despite being quite groggy. She was still amazed each time Stacie would cook, awed by how well she did so. Her and Jesse were well fed to say the least. She stood up, but before she could head downstairs, everything hit her at once. She recalled her dentist appointment and the fact that it was Chloe that had executed the procedure. She vaguely recalled being high as a kite and saying a bunch of the dumbest things on Earth. Though she couldn't recall much of it, she felt it deep within herself that she had spoken way too much. Then lyrics began popping into her head, and they were fierce and passionate. Soon, an entire song was streaming through her mind. Her fingers had subconsciously began to tap out the beat on the desk she now stood beside, and she was in a trance as the song played. The moment it ended, she rushed into her desk chair, pulling her laptop up and a notepad. She began jotting down the lyrics as she lit up a joint to soothe the throbbing in her jaw, tweaking and altering the words where she saw fit, but it was not hard. The song had practically written itself in her thoughts. When she finished that, she began creating the beat on her computer, fingers flitting across keyboard and drum machine, adding the bass, the percussion, the synths and strings then the piano and little bells and whistles. The sound was mellow and slow but powerful. It made her heart swell with excitement. As she worked, she could feel the music come to life before her, and she didn't have to think. It had already been done. All she had to do was make it real. By the time Jesse appeared in the doorway half an hour later, she was nearly done with the mixing of the beat. She just had a few extra spins to add on.

"Hey, cottonmouth, dinner's done," Jesse alerted her with a smirk.

"Clever, J, really clever," she snarked.

"What are you doing?"

"What do I ever do?"

"Right. Did the drugs inspire you?"

She smirked. "Something like that."

He quirked an eyebrow. "Okay, now I know that everyone else is easily deterred, and they don't push you for info, but I am your _twin _brother, okay? Twin! That means I know things, so spill."

"There's nothing-"

"Tell me!"

He closed the door now, sensing that she wanted no one else to know, specifically a hot brunette in the kitchen, and he squatted down beside her chair, hand on the armrest.

"Come on," he urge lightly.

She huffed out a breath, knowing he would not relent. She turned to look into his bright brown eyes which were filled with question and pre-established understanding.

"Chloe," she breathed.

"Chloe?" he repeated. "The redhead back at that concert? The Novacane dentist?"

"Yeah."

She watched him closely, awaiting the realization, and it suddenly hit him, lighting up his eyes.

"Holy shit," he breathed. "It- she was the dentist."

"Yeah, J, and-wow. She-dammit."

"B, we both know you never stopped thinking about her since the day she left. You never talked about her, but she was always on your mind. I could see that. What did you say to her?"

"Nothing. I just-I-I couldn't bring myself to ask her any of the questions I had on my mind, and after that, I was drugged up, so who knows how stupid I was, but-yeah."

"Well, why don't you go back and talk to her?"

"Jeez, Jess, I can't just go back and ask her 'hey, why did you take off on me?' That's so-"

"Normal? Because it is, B. I think you have a right to know. Maybe she left before you did. I mean, you're a star. She never expected you to actually want her more after that."

"But she could've asked."

"So could you."

She knew he was right, and she could not even form a proper answer. "I know."

"Look, just go talk to her."

"What-what about Stacie?"

"You never made it official with Stacie. Besides, I know she cares about you, but you can't just settle to spare feelings, Becs. You obviously really like this girl. She's stayed with you for two years, you know. You never forgot her, and that's unlike you, so you have to do this or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Understand?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Okay, so you'll talk to her?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah."

"Okay, now can you come down for dinner? Aubrey's waiting." He stood now.

"Yeah, I just have to make a quick call."

"Okay."

He nodded before leaving the room. She then pulled out her phone, dialing a familiar number and putting it to her ear.

"B!" an enthusiastic voice came through.

"Frankie!" she greeted back with a chuckle.

"What up, Baby!"

"Nothing much. Hey, you're still in LA, right?"

"Yup, I gotta go back and pack up the rest of my stuff next month, but I'll be here. We got the show at the Key Club in two weeks."

"Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, Mr. Ocean, I have a song for you."


	6. Out of Character

**_A/N: So in this chapter, I better explain the reasoning behind the song about drugs. Love is a drug at times. It makes you act like someone, brings you out of character, and that's what it does to Beca but in a good way of course._**

* * *

_No, I don't like you, I just thought you were cool_

_Enough to kick it_

_Got a beach house I could sell you in Idaho_

_Since you think I don't love you, I just thought you were cute_

_That's why I kissed you_

_Got a fighter jet, I don't get to fly it, though_

_I'm lyin' down thinkin' 'bout you _

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you _

_I've been thinkin' 'bout you_

_Do you think about me still?_

_Do ya, do ya?_

_Or do you not think so far ahead_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever _

* * *

Frank Ocean sat in Control Room C of Bella Records bobbing his head up and down enthusiastically, a wide grin plastered on his face as he tapped along with the beat. Beca sat back with a humble grin, idly enjoying the sounds pumping through the speakers of the room. It was flawless. Luke, Aubrey and Cynthia Rose were lost in the mellow track, the CEO dancing carelessly in her seat. It was a simple arrangement. Frank's voice started off the track with his smooth vocals on the intro verse, and he took the chorus immediately following. There was a slight break in lyrics before Beca came in with her own solid vocals half rapping, half singing the second verse before she too took the following chorus. They took the final bridge and chorus together, and as a whole, there was no way in their minds that this track could fail. Their Def Jam reps were there as well. Ever since Bella Records had been swept under the Def Jam umbrella two years ago, these men were around a lot. Bella Records was their top-selling investment, and they loved to watch the magic of their most favored artist. Frank and Beca had finished the entire recording and post-production process in a week, and no one could complain which was normally the outcome no matter the time frame. The lyrics were so soft that you would never feel insulted or mortified by what they were actually saying. Beca had in fact brought her drug to life, but in this form, it was legal and sold through iTunes.

When the song faded out, Frank let out a victorious cackle, throwing a fist in the air before standing and embracing his producer. It was no secret that whenever the two artists collaborated, magic was formed. She laughed into his shoulder before they parted. Aubrey clapped her sister's shoulder as Luke and Cynthia Rose bumped fists. The CEO gave Beca a proud smile, slinging an arm over her shoulder. Hal Callahan, one of the Def Jam reps, stepped forward with a big grin.

"That's astounding," he assured. "It's sure to sell. We'll get dates set up for the video shoot, but we'll release the track in let's say, two weeks? Sound good?"

"Yeah, sounds perfect," Beca replied. "Luke can get you guys a copy. I unfortunately have to get going though."

"Oh, yeah, checkup with the dentist, right?" Frank smirked.

"Yeah," she replied, bumping his fist with a chuckle. "Gonna get cleared today."

"I'm surprised you didn't tear your mouth open recording," Aubrey huffed.

"Well, the stitches dissolved. She just wanted to check up on them."

"Okay, just get going."

After bidding everyone farewell, Beca made her way out of the studio and to her Charger. She slid into the passenger seat and quickly lit up. Though she had concealed it from everyone, she was very nervous about this appointment because she would be seeing Chloe again, and she really wanted to talk to the redhead. She wanted to tell her how she felt, what it was like to wake up alone that morning, how it had been for her the last two years, and she wanted to do it sober. Well, as sober as she would normally be. However, she wasn't sure how to breach the subject at all because initiating serious conversations or confrontations was not in Beca Mitchell's repertoire. She simply wasn't programmed to do so. Even when someone else made the first move, it was never easy to get through it. She decided she would just go with the flow and pray all went well.

Much sooner than she would have preferred, Beca pulled into the dentist office parking wait was twenty-five minutes, and when asked if she would prefer to see another dentist and speed up the process, she politely declined. The anxiety was overwhelming, and she could not control the nervous twitches in her limbs as her leg dribbled against the floor. She kept stealing frantic glances at the door across the room, biting at her fingernails and scolding herself for doing so. At last, Brittany appeared in the lobby and called her back. She followed the blonde through the door to one of the rooms and took a seat in the chair. Her nerves kicked into overdrive. Her knee bounced, fingers tapping against the armrest aimlessly as she gnawed on her bottom lip. When she heard the door open behind her, she stilled herself. Then Chloe stood before her with a warm smile, hair pulled back in a ponytail. Beca's throat seemed to close around her oxygen supply, heart in the pit of her stomach.

"Hello, Miss Mitchell," she greeted, and the formality caused the brunette to wince.

"Hi, Dr. Beale," she returned shyly, eyes downcast.

"How are you feeling today?"

"Uh, fine. Just-fine. Uh, how-how about you?"

"I'm doing fine. You're my last patient of the day, so I'm happy." She giggled, and Beca's heart melted at the sound. "Thank you for asking. Are you ready for the examination?"

"Yes, I am."

"Okay, so let's see it."

Beca opened her mouth wide when prompted, and Chloe examined the back of it carefully, prodding at the tissue where the teeth had been extracted from. Beca's eyes were closed, unable to meet the deep blue, but even when she was all finished, she couldn't find the words to say. Chloe had her gargle something to clean her mouth with then she spit it out in the sink. Her tongue and inner cheeks tingled a bit from the liquid, and she smacked her lips softly.

"Okay, so the extraction points healed up well, and the stitches have fully dissolved. Do you have any questions or concerns?"

_"Yeah, I have a question. Why did you run away?"_ Beca thought but could not say aloud.

"Uh, no, nope. No questions," the brunette replied.

"Okay, we're all done here then. Just make sure to do your usual brushing, and if you have any complications, pain or discomfort, you can call and make an appointment."

"O-okay, thanks."

Beca stood up then while Chloe put away her utensils. She grabbed her jacket and walked out of the room, berating herself for not saying anything, for letting it end there because this was it. This was the end, and Beca had proven to be a coward. Beca was an emotionally stunted coward who could never admit the truth about feelings and affections to herself. Even when she could, she could not act upon them because as badass as she came across, she was still the scared little girl she had been when her father tore their family apart by going to prison.

No, Beca was no coward. Beca was a world-famous DJ who could have any woman she wanted, and she wanted many, but she needed Chloe. She had never been so relentlessly haunted, taunted, teased in such a way through her subconscious mind. No one had ever made such an impression on her in such little time and continued to do so without actually being there, and she could feel her brother, see him, hear him at that moment, his words now being chanted over and over in her head.

_"...you have to do this or you'll regret it for the rest of your life."_

Beca froze in the hallway, taking a deep breath before turning around. Chloe was walking out of the office at that moment, closing the door and heading in the opposite direction.

"Chloe?" she called nervously before she could talk herself out of it.

"Yeah?" the redhead replied, jerking her head back to look at the DJ.

"Uh, you-you said that I was your last patient, right?"

"Yeah."

"Can I-will you-can we grab dinner?"

Chloe was shocked, but her mouth spoke before her brain could comprehend. "Uh, yeah, sure. Just give me a moment, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll wait in the lot. The Charger out front."

"K."

Chloe hurried back down the hall, and she wasn't sure if she should be completely terrified or beyond ecstatic. After retrieving her purse from her office, she rushed to the bathroom, pulling off her lab coat and checking her hair and makeup. When she had cleaned up, she took some deep breaths in front of the mirror. She ran a hand through her hair, now down and out of the ponytail, before turning and briskly exiting the building via the employee entrance in the back, letting one of the dental assistants know she was leaving her car in the lot for awhile. She turned the corner of the building to see the black Charger sitting there, the only patient vehicle left. She walked over, pulling open the door as smoke wafted from the cracked windows. Beca quickly stamped her joint out, setting it in the ashtray as she started the car.

"Still smoking then?" the redhead asked with a smirk.

"Of course," Beca replied. "However, not as much. Ever since you got me hooked on this stuff, I mean, I don't need it so much. The high lasts forever."

"Oh, so you figured it out then?"

"Yeah, my personal botanist kind of did."

Chloe giggled as they headed down the street. "Oh, the luxury of being Beca Mitchell."

"I guess so. I mean, you don't smoke anymore, right?"

"Sometimes. When I can get away, you know?"

"Would you-like to smoke? Now? With me?"

Chloe knew why she took the offered joint from the awkwardly cute and nervous brunette. It made her feel herself again. She wasn't Tom's uptight girlfriend or her parents' perfect little girl that did no wrong. She was Chloe Beale, the outgoing free spirit that was trapped behind the facade. Beca passed her the lit up joint, and she inhaled it deeply. She hadn't smoked in weeks but mostly because Tom had taken some vacation time for the two weeks prior when his mother came into town. That meant he was around more which meant her father was around as well, and she could not let either know of her habits. The stress of her parents and boyfriend mixed with the lack of stress relief was exhausting and overwhelming, but now sitting there with Beca, she felt at ease. As she took another hit, they pulled into the parking lot of an elegant Italian restaurant. They finished their smoke before venturing inside.

"The name on the reservation?" the host questioned.

"Mitchell," Beca replied. "I called about twenty minutes ago."

"Ah, B!" Another voice came from behind the host, and Beca looked up to see the manager of the place, Denise Eldridge, a mutual friend of Ashley's and the owner of the best Italian joint in town as Beca believed. "I heard you were coming in."

"Hey, Denise," Beca greeted, leaning into the embrace she was now in. "How's it going?"

"Great. Come on back. I have your table waiting, but-" She glanced over at Chloe with a smirk. "You usually only bring Jesse and Ashley to your favorite place. Who's the lucky girl?"

Both Chloe and Beca blushed. "Denise, this is Chloe Beale, my-dentist. Chloe, this is Denise, the owner of this fine establishment and creator of her famous secret Alfredo formula."

"Mmmm, is it good?" Chloe asked. "I love Alfredo."

"The best, I promise."

"Always the charmer," Denise chuckled, patting her shoulder.

She led the couple to their booth and took their orders, which they of course had already decided on, before moving away from the table. Beca fiddled with her fingers nervously, trying to figure out what to say to the redhead, but Chloe, never one to be silent, spoke first.

"So, how's the music coming along?"

"It-it's good," she choked out, clearing her throat. "I-we just finished some work with Frank Ocean today for my new single, and I'm working on Jay-Z's new album."

"Yeah, you two do amazing work together. I bought Blueprint 3 after the..."

She trailed off now, not wanting to recall that weekend at Coachella. Beca froze, eyes locked on her lap as her face heated up. To Chloe's relief, their drinks arrived, and Beca poured each of them a glass of wine that she ordered for the table. She took a long drink before returning her eyes down to her hands. She wanted to ask, needed to ask, but she didn't know how to ask. She didn't want to scare Chloe off, and trust that the irony of the entire situation was not lost on either woman. At last, she looked up. Chloe was tracing her fingers along the cup thoughtlessly, eyes fixed on the table before her.

"Uh, hey," Beca called, almost a whisper that would have been muted had they not been in such a private area.

"Yeah?" Chloe answered, looking up.

"Is-is this awkward for you? Like, to be honest."

"I-no. I don't know. I mean, I usually don't go out to dinner with people I had one-night stands with is all. I mean, it's not bad. I wanna be here, but I-I don't know."

"Well, it was actually a three-night stand so, I think we're good there."

Chloe smiled softly at that. "Right."

"Uh, was-well, was that all it was though? I mean, okay. That's a stupid question." Beca was overloading now. "Of course. I mean, it was Coachella, a big hippie get-together, and we were high, and you were in college, and I was famous, and-"

Chloe wasn't sure if she should feel guilty or insulted now. "Beca, wait. No, I didn't sleep with you because you were famous."

"You didn't?" Beca was truly and genuinely curious, and Chloe wasn't sure, but she thought she saw what could pass as relief on those steel blue eyes.

"No, I-I mean, I love your music, but the Novacane, it-it helped me be myself again, and I knew you had been in a hole, so I wanted to help you. Then-I-you were so down to Earth and stuff, so I-I slept with you and spent that weekend with you because I wanted to spend it with you."

Here goes nothing. "Then-why did you leave?"

"I mean-I-I was sure you wouldn't pursue more than that, and I was focused on school up in Berkeley, and you were gonna be a star again, and I..." She took a breath now, scared to say what she had to say. "Well, there was a guy. My boyfriend, Tom, but I-he's my dad's best friend. He's a doctor, and he's perfect, and my parents love him, and I-I had to go back to being perfect for them. I had to go back to that. I'm sorry, Beca, if I hurt you. I would never wanna hurt you. I mean, I know I shouldn't-it's just-I don't..."

Beca wanted to tell her the truth. She wanted to tell her about the relentless dreams, the endless song of her voice that played like the soundtrack of her every move, the taunting ghost of her blue eyes and red hair that was forever seared into the inside of Beca's eyelids. She wanted her to know that she needed her, but she could not do that. It had been hard enough to ask the questions she had, and Beca was not one to chase.

"Hey, Chloe, you don't have to feel bad," she went on after a deep breath. "I-it's okay. I'm sorry. I mean, I wasn't sure what I wanted then either. I understand. It's okay. I-"

Before she could go on, their food arrived. She thanked Denise, who had personally brought it before turning back to Chloe as the owner walked away. Chloe looked down at her plate, and though Beca knew she wasn't thinking of the meal before her, the brunette also knew that she wanted to be saved from the thoughts raging in her mind.

"I promise it's the best," she offered with a smile.

Chloe looked up and smirked at her. "We shall see."

"Well, go on then."

Beca had not lied. They ate, Chloe moaning in satisfaction at her first bite while Beca grinned. Conversation was much lighter then. They talked about music, their respective jobs, their hobbies, their likes and dislikes. They laughed and enjoyed one another's company. The pangs of darker emotions were set to the side to dwell on later, but for now, they just indulged in the moment. Beca had even left her phone in her car, avoiding any and all possible distractions or disruptions. Chloe's was still off in her purse from the work day. When the meal concluded, they headed out, Beca checking for any paparazzi before opening the door. The cameras usually never came to Denise's place. The owner had been sure of that the first few times Beca had come. She had threatened to cut one of them up and use him for the soup of the day, and she would have some of her more muscled hosts play security if any cameraman dared to test her. They drove back to Chloe's office where her car was parked. Night had fallen, and the medical plaza was empty. Chloe knew that Tom had probably been calling her all night, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Yet, Beca could not get the thought out of her mind.

"I hope I don't get you in trouble," she admitted nervously as they stood beside her car.

"What?" Chloe asked.

"I mean, with your boyfriend."

"Oh, no, don't worry. It'll be fine. He's probably at the hospital by now."

"Oh, right. A doctor."

"Yeah. A doctor."

"That's-that's good, I mean."

"Yeah, my parents think so."

Beca wanted to further discuss what she meant but could not bring herself to do so. She would mentally berate herself later, but for now, she could only muster to be awkward Beca. She shifted from foot to foot a moment. What did it matter anyway? She couldn't possibly expect Chloe to just up and leave this Tom fellow for her. What could she possibly offer her?

"Well, I had a great time tonight," Beca finally admitted sheepishly.

"Yeah, I did too. Thank you for dinner and-taking me to your special place."

"No problem. I figured you would appreciate it."

"So-friends?"

The brunette looked up now, unsure of what to say. "Uh, of course. Friends."

"Here. Let me see your phone."

Beca extracted the device from her pocket hesitantly, unlocking the screen and handing it over. Chloe quickly inserted her number before sending herself a text message and storing Beca's. Beca looked out over the deserted lot, bouncing on the balls of her feet with her hands clasped behind her back. Chloe at last handed her phone over once more.

"Text me or call me sometime, okay?" the redhead said. "Anytime."

"Yeah, of course," Beca agreed with a nod. "Good night, Chloe."

Chloe suddenly pulled the smaller woman into a bone-crushing hug. "Goodnight, Beca."

When Beca arrived home, her head was spinning. She sat in her car, puffing a joint in hasty sequence to calm her nerves. The numbing effect could not descend fast enough. A single tear fell from her eyes as she rolled her head back. Never had she felt like this. Never had she felt so weak, and it scared the hell out of her. It angered her to the core, and she was sickened by what she had become because she was Beca fucking Mitchell. She didn't need any woman to make her happy. She had a Victoria's Secret model for crying out loud. She had fame and fortune. She was a household name with millions of fans. Yet, she loved none of it or felt as strongly about any of it as she felt for Chloe, and nothing scared her more than this revelation.

"What the fuck!" she barked to no one, banging her hands against the steering wheel.

She lit another joint immediately after the first, and she had not smoked more than two full joints in a day in such a long time. She knew that it was bad, but she refused to face just how bad it really was. She was angry with herself for falling for someone so quickly, so easily, so vulnerably when that person had not even cared for her. The woman had a boyfriend back home for Christ's sake. The DJ had been nothing more than a weekend fling, and it was pathetic, but it made her see what it felt like to be a toy. She had done it to so many women prior, and she had refused to do it ever since she met Chloe. She didn't bring women home after that. She had found loyalty, pledged allegiance to Stacie because she knew she could trust the angel. Karma was a bitch though, and Beca had never believed that statement more than she did now.

Beca lolled her head back against the seat, trying to hold in the hit. As she exhaled, the passenger door opened. Jesse slid inside of the car, closing the door with a grim look on his face. She mirrored it. All of their lives, it had worked this way. Beca had slowly learned to hide the most important things from her older sister like selling weed or even liking girls for the longest while. She had then learned to hide emotions from the blonde with stone eyes and sullen features. However, she could never hide anything emotional from her little brother. Of course not. He didn't have to read anything because he _felt _everything. She knew that he had felt her pain in his gut like a forceful jab of a sword. It was the way she had known he didn't get his first movie gig, how she knew that Leah Perry had broken up with him on prom night in high school. It was the unbreakable bond of twins that relayed those overbearing emotions from one to the other. The good thing was that although Beca knew she couldn't hide from him, the bond allowed her to feel comfortable around her brother. It was still hard because she felt that she had to be strong for him. He was so soft and sensitive, and if he saw her weak, it may scare him. However, it was not so. Jesse never doubted her strength or looked down on her. If anything, he loved her more when he was reminded his sister was not immortal, and he took great care of every situation where she was bent.

"What happened?" he asked, taking the joint she offered.

"She-has a boyfriend," she chuckled bitterly. "She had that boyfriend-before."

"Seriously? I-dammit, Becs." Jesse had learned long ago not to show pity or utter the word sorry. He just had to stay beside her. "Did you tell her how you feel?"

"How could I, Jess? After she said that, I shut down. She said that I was just a fling. She used me as an escape from her perfect life. I didn't know what else to say. I mean, she wants to be friends. We went down to Denise's, and we had dinner, but-"

"But you want more than that. It isn't that you want it actually. It's that you need it, or you feel you need it. She's just as addicting as this Novacane."

"Glad I didn't have to try and put that into words." They shared a soft laugh.

"Yeah, we keep it tight. I know though, B. I understand. She love him?"

"I didn't ask, but-she said that he was perfect for her parents, and after the concert, she-she had to go back to being perfect for them."

"Seriously, B? Did you hear what you just said? He's a tool!"

"Yeah, J, but she specifically said friends."

"Because she's worried you don't want her anymore after what she told you, and she's scared."

"Are you her twin or mine?"

He slapped her arm playfully. "Come on. You know I'm right. She sounds miserable."

"She looked miserable when she was talking about it."

"Okay, so-take it slow, B. Show her why you can be the better choice. Show her that you're not just a celebrity. You're serious about this."

"I don't know. I mean I-"

"Remember what I said, B. You let it end, you live with the regret. Now, come on before Stacie comes out here. She's been calling you for like three hours. I knew where you were, but I couldn't tell her that now could I?"

She snorted. "Of course you did. Thanks, J."

The twins headed inside then to find Stacie serving dinner. Beca assured her that she wasn't hungry because her mouth was hurting slightly. It was a lie but the only thing she could think of, and Stacie bought it, so she went with it. She then retired upstairs to the studio in the loft, checking e-mails and working on mixes. As she pulled up the "Novacane" track, her phone began to ring. She picked it up to find a text from Chloe, and she could not fight the smile that broke onto her lips. Such perfect timing.

_'Thanks again for dinner, DJ," _it read.

Beca reread it a few times with a sigh before replying. _"Thanks for going with me. I had a really good time catching up, and..." _She paused a moment, Jesse's voice once again reciting its cadence in her head. _"I'm really glad to have you back in my life."_

Meanwhile, as Chloe received the DJ's reply, she fell off of the arm of her chair in her home and onto the floor with a soft thud and a yelp. Tom immediately rushed into the den as he tried buttoning his shirt, readying for a shift at the hospital.

"You okay, babe?" he asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," she replied with a pout. "I just fell."

"Oh." He shrugged before walking out again.

She scoffed. Leave it up to Tom. The man was a doctor yet he could not be anymore inconsiderate sometimes. She looked back down at her phone, her breath catching once more. Had the DJ really said that? Her heart fluttered wildly as she thought up a response.

_"So am I," _is what she settled for. _"It was great seeing you again."_

_"Yeah, mildly sober, right? Not hyped up on giggle gas." _Chloe laughed at that.

_"That's right." _She took a moment to consider her next question. _"Hey, are you busy tomorrow?"_

_"Uh, no, actually. My one real day off."_

_"Oh, okay, well you don't have to waste your day off, but I was wondering if maybe you would like to meet up for coffee or something."_

_"Yeah, I'll meet you on the pier at say ten?"_

_"Yeah, that sounds great. Good night, DJ."_

_"Good night, Dentist."_

Chloe giggled as she set her phone down on the coffee table. Tom appeared once more, slipping into his jacket and grabbing his lab coat and bag. She stood now to say goodbye to him for the evening. She leaned in to kiss him, but he turned so that her lips landed on his cheek.

"Later," he said.

"Bye," she returned.

He walked out then, and Chloe expelled a breath she was unaware of holding. Tom was just the genuine all-American boy with a reputation to uphold. He had the amazing job, the endless respect of the medical community, the adoration of LA's top neurosurgeon Mark Beale and the trophy girlfriend that he soon planned to make his wife. That was all she was to him too. Chloe knew it was what he wanted, what her father wanted, what her mother wanted. However, she wasn't sure it was what she wanted. She wanted everyone to be happy, but having the free spirited DJ back in her life rekindled that fire within her, that desire for freedom and spontaneity. How could she possibly live with letting her parents down? Then again, how could she live with letting herself down? She could only hope that the right answer would make itself known. First, she wanted to see what it would be like to have Beca in her life, to feel free again even if it meant leading a double life.

Beca lay down beside Stacie that night at three a.m., the model already fast asleep. Beca felt a pang of guilt in her stomach although she wasn't sure why. What if she could be with Chloe? How was she to explain it to Stacie, her partner in crime, her best friend, the woman that loved her and stuck by her, that she loved another? That she had been given another chance? If she did get the chance, there was no way she could pass it up. It would be a sign, but she couldn't break Stacie's heart. Somehow she would have to find a way to avoid as much hurt as possible. She only knew that her feelings for Chloe could not be contested with. They could not be erased or washed away. Two years couldn't do it. What else possibly could? In those two years, the dreams had remained so vivid, the memories so detailed, Chloe still so stunning and enchanting. What Beca felt was not something that she could readily deal with, but for the redhead that had revived her, she would try her damnedest. Maybe she could bring Chloe back to life the way Chloe had done for her. It had to begin somewhere, and Beca planned to do so. Jesse had been right. Chloe was just like the drug. She would go to the ends of the earth to have more of it, to keep it forever, to never be parted from it for extended amounts of time. It had similarities with other drugs as well because drugs could change you as a person. It could make you do things you would never normally do to get it, and that's what Chloe had become. Beca would do anything to have her, and she was not prepared to quit. She couldn't quit. Chloe had not given up on her or her music. She wouldn't give up on Chloe either even if that meant coming out of the shell she had placed herself in that shielded her from weakening emotions.


	7. The Most Dangerous Thing to Want is More

**_A/N: So how's everyone feeling about things? Reviews have been a bit quiet, but thank you to those who voiced their opinions. I have a million stories in my head, and im trying to get this one done while still working. I just want to go on record and say that my stories will probably get more and more outrageous. I think many readers categorized me as a one-trick pony that would always write these easy-going themes, but Im not. my writing evolves constantly and with that, so do the story lines. I apologize if I catch you off guard, but Im writing what I feel so thank you to those who have understood. I promise Ill always do my very best, but it wont always be easy. Just know that I never write a story without a moral behind it. This one is simply based on the drug-like characteristics of love and how it changes us whether we wish it to or not._**

* * *

_Yes, of course_

_I remember, how could I forget (how could I forget)?_

_How you feel (how you feel)?_

_You know you were my first time (time)._

_A new feel_

_It won't ever get old, not in my soul,_

_Not in my spirit, keep it alive (spirit, keep it alive)_

_We'll go down this road_

_'Til it turns from color to black and white_

_Or do you not think so far ahead_

_'Cause I've been thinkin' 'bout forever_

* * *

Stacie dismissed herself from the bedroom the moment she dismounted the DJ, opting for a shower before heading to her photo shoot early that morning. It was only five a.m., but when Beca had awakened as Stacie stirred, she had immediately pounced on the DJ in what could only be categorized as desperation because she had been jumping on Beca for two weeks now without warning. Beca huffed in exasperation as she sat up in bed. Two weeks. It had been two weeks since she had first had dinner with Chloe, two weeks since her and the redhead had begun to hang out regularly without Tom's or Stacie's knowledge. It had been two weeks since her daily Novacane dosage had shot up, and Benji was becoming a very rich man apart from his day job at the medical forensic lab. It had been two weeks since Stacie first realized that the love her and Beca made was no longer love again. It was just sex, if you could even call it that. While she ground into the DJ, the smaller woman would only groan but not fully interact, and it had Stacie frustrated. She feared Beca was back in one of her slumps. She blamed the drug, but at the same time, the drug had not even been doing its job anymore recently. Something had to have happened. Maybe Beca was slipping into that hole again, but Stacie had no idea how to approach her on the subject. Maybe she was overreacting or being selfish. She didn't quite understand, but it was much too soon in her mind to know. Instead, she decided to give it time and hope it was temporary.

Once Stacie left the room, Beca got up and dressed then headed down to their home gym in the basement. After a long and rigorous workout, she took a shower. Stacie had already left When she finished, she found Jesse downstairs. He handed her a mug of coffee, and she raised it in gratitude before slumping into a stool at the kitchen island.

"What are your plans for today, sis?" he asked, sitting across from her.

"Working on Jay's sound," she replied. "What about you?"

He drummed his fingers on the countertop as a grin formed on his face. She quirked an eyebrow at him, stilling her cup midway to her mouth. When he looked up at her, she gave him an expectant look, head cocked.

"We have a meeting today," he began fervently. "They're working on the new 'Man of Steel' movie, and they're considering me."  
She snorted a laugh. "I should've guessed a superhero movie would have you up the wall."

"Hey, you and I both agree that Superman is pretty generic, but I could at least make the damned flick bearing, right?"

"Actually, J, yeah, it could. Maybe hearing your composition will drive them to have a more meaningful plot line."

"Well, actually, they want me to co-write the script."

"What!?"

Jesse had always secretly loved writing scripts of movies, but getting into the music scoring business had been tough enough, and Warner Brothers had never taken a second look at his manuscripts. He had been hurt, and Beca had sensed it, but he had conformed to their wishes and accepted the opportunity handed to him. She knew though that he would give anything for a chance to prove his writing skills.

"That's amazing, J," she cheered, reaching over to pat his shoulder with a smile.

"I know," he agreed with a vigorous nodding of his head. "One of the producers found my manuscript in the break room the other day, the one I wrote on Flash. I guess I left it by accident, and now they want to speak to me. I'm nervous."

"Don't be nervous. You're gonna be great. Those comics you used to make were golden, and you're ten times better now. I will definitely go see that movie."

He grinned because getting his sister to willingly attend a movie was as difficult as trying to pull her wisdom teeth, and he felt pride any time he was able to accomplish the feat. Deep inside, she knew how much it meant to him too, so she did in fact try to entertain him when possible. The joy emanating from him now was patched over to her, and she smiled.

"Really?" he asked, eyes lit up like Christmas lights.

"Really," she smirked.

"Nice. So, how's Chloe?" He grinned devilishly now.

"Uh, she's good. Yeah, good. Great, I guess."

"Yeah? Any updates?"

She chuckled. "Jeez, J, what do you want me to say? We hang out. That's it."

"No, that's not it because she hasn't introduced you to her boyfriend. Therefore, she is scared because you never introduce your significant other to the competition."

"That's not true."

"Oh, really? So when are you going to invite Chloe over for dinner? Introduce her to Stacie?"

Beca was silent now, and Jesse knew he was right. Hell, _she_ knew he was right. He was right a lot these days. She sighed heavily.

"Well, I'm meeting her for breakfast, so I better get going," she at last spoke up.

"Really?" he said, failing at hiding the knowing smile.

"Shut up."

She ruffled his hair before going up to her room to grab her keys and bag. She at last made it down to her vehicle, sliding into the sleek, black Camaro and pulling out of the drive. She was to pick up breakfast to-go from the diner down the street then retrieve Chloe from a local gym near her office. She picked up the order promptly at six forty-five then headed to the gym facility. When she arrived, Chloe was already outside in the dimming light of the coming dawn. Her hair was still damp from her shower minutes prior, but she looked gorgeous as always, and as always, Beca's breath became lodged in her windpipe for the longest second ever. Chloe skipped happily to the car, sliding in and pecking Beca on the cheek as she did so. This action was new, and Beca couldn't help but look over and raise an eyebrow. Then she smirked, putting the car in drive.

"Someone's impossibly more-chipper today," she commented.

"It's a good morning," Chloe chirped, smiling as she looked out the windshield. "I missed you."  
Beca just about fell over, laughing nervously. "I-it's been two days, Chlo."

"48 hours."

"Like 46, but hey. Who's counting, right?"

"Us obviously."

They shared a laugh. "Good workout then?"

"Marvelous. You?"

"Yeah, mine was-it was good."

"So where are we going?"

"The beach. Right near the pier. It's nice out this morning for November, you know."

"Yeah, it is."

"Although you still shouldn't be running around outside with your hair wet. You could get sick."

She giggled. "Thanks, I'll pull my hood up, promise."

"Good, or else I'd have to do it for you."

Chloe only laughed as they pulled into the beach parking lot. Beca grabbed the bag of food, exiting the car and setting it on the hood as Chloe stepped out, obediently pulling her hood up onto her head before grabbing their coffees in the drink carrier. Beca chuckled lightly as she pulled her own hoodie on and picked up the food once more then Chloe a took her hand, jerking her down onto the cool sand. They took a spot right beneath the pier where the water lightly kissed the large legs of the structure. Beca unpacked breakfast, handing Chloe her styrofoam plate with her special omelette inside. Beca opened up her own meat lover's omelette and hash browns, taking a big bite. The atmosphere was calm, serene and relaxing. They looked over the water, the various birds above making the only sounds to be heard at the moment. The pier was still deserted, and the sun had only risen over the horizon. Chloe sighed in content, taking a sip of her coffee.

"I've been in LA a year, and I still have never seen a sunrise," she quipped. "Or sunset."

"Okay, well one down, one to go," Beca returned, swallowing a bite of hash brown.

"Yeah, you owe me a sunset."

"Deal, Beale."

Chloe giggled. "Clever."

"Always."

"So, what are your plans for today?"

"Studio. Working on the next three tracks for Jay's album."

"Are you performing anytime soon?"

"No, not yet. We're getting set up for a video, but I DJ next month for the Victoria's Secret winter fashion show after-party or whatever."

"Oh, yeah. That sounds fun. What's it like?"

"What?" Beca lit a joint now, taking a large hit.

"Dating a-model."

The DJ scoffed. "We aren't dating. I mean, we're close, and we-we're there for each other, but we aren't like-official. I-she's a model, yeah, but I don't know. She's not-what I want."

Chloe tried to hide the relief she felt while Beca attempted to determine whether or not that was a subtle or not so subtle hint. She decided just to keep the conversation moving. They had never once talked about their respective love lives, but Beca figured it was the only perfect chance she would be offered to breach the subject.

"What's it like-dating a doctor?" she asked, handing over the joint as she scooped up a hand full of sand and let it sift through her fingers slowly.

"It-well, it's not all it's cracked up to be," she admitted, the hit already numbing her mind as well as her lips, loosening them significantly. "It-well, he's Tom. He's perfect, externally."

"Internally?"

"He-he's just a guy. He-he can be sweet when he wants to be, but he's all about appearance, and if there's no one to show off for, he really doesn't put forth the effort."

"Then why are you with him?" Beca blamed the courage on the Novacane.

Chloe froze, mind completely shutting down for a moment before it began to formulate a response. She was oblivious to the DJ now holding her breath as she awaited the response. Beca wasn't sure what to expect. Chloe wasn't sure how to answer. Neither really knew what the other wanted to say or hear, but still, they were intently focused on the moment because inside, they only wanted the other happy no matter the cost. However, it worried Beca. She wondered how happy Chloe truly was with Tom, but she also wondered if she could possibly be good enough for the redhead. She worked all of the time. She dedicated herself to music. However, she had been making time for the redhead. She could not help it, and she knew both Aubrey and Stacie were beginning to become suspicious. Still, she could not help herself. It was her greatest addiction, and in dubbing Chloe so, she had given Chloe the power to either take her to her highest point and crush her at the bottom into a million shards.

"I-he's a nice guy," Chloe finally managed.

"Chlo, you don't have to give me a politically correct answer," she chided lightly.

"I-it's a habit."

"Is that it then? You're with him because it's politically correct?"

"I just-my parents like him, and-"

"Do you like him though?"

"Yeah, I like him."

"Do-do you-love him?"

"Jeez, what's with the third degree!" she snapped suddenly, and Beca winced at the tone. Chloe immediately regretted the outburst. "B, I'm-"

"No, Chloe, it's okay. I-I didn't mean to intrude. I just-I-I just want you happy."

Chloe's features softened instantly, and she gently took Beca's chin in her hand, steering her steel blue eyes to meet the redhead's because no one had ever said that. No one had ever expressed concern for what she wanted, for her happiness. Not her parents. Not Tom. No one except this world-renowned DJ. Even being a dentist had been a goal drilled into her mind at a young age. It was either that or a doctor, and she had chosen dentist, but when asked why she wanted to be one, she always gave the politically correct answer and not 'it was my parents' wish'.

"You're a good friend, Becs," she crooned though the statement did more harm than good to Beca. "Thank you, but I-"

"You're with him because you feel obligated to be," the DJ boldly whispered, surprising herself with saying it aloud. "That isn't love nor is it right. I understand you don't want to let your parents down. Hell, I still worry about letting my dad down, and the bastard did it first, but I would never jeopardize my happiness because in the end, I'm going to suffer not them."

"I-Tom's fine. He's a good guy."

"You don't deserve good. You deserve the best."

"Maybe this is what I deserve."

"You're accepting what you _think _you deserve, but I know for a fact you can do better."

"No, B, I can't."

That shattered Beca's heart completely. She looked away from the redhead swiftly, and it was then that Chloe registered what she had said. How could she take it back though? How could she backpedal and tell Beca that she was falling for her? She could not do that. Beca was a womanizer, a celebrity artist, the world's most beloved. How could Chloe possibly contest with models and Victoria's Secret angels? How would she be able to handle the fast life that came with Beca Mitchell? Their friendship had yet to endure such publicity or hindrance, but she knew a relationship would be much different. There was no way that it wouldn't be. She had to do this. It was best for both of them. All she could do was keep Beca in her life as a friend because she knew better. The moment Beca became bored with a dentist, she would move on, and Chloe couldn't take that heartbreak at the risk of her father's good graces and mother's pride.

Beca took a drag of the joint to bide time before they had to speak again, and she thanked all above when her phone began ringing. She pulled it out to see Aubrey's name. She handed Chloe the joint before standing up and walking a short distance. Chloe began taking deep inhales of the smoke while Beca took the call, thankful for the escape.

"Bree," she greeted.

"B!" the blonde screeched, Beca jerking the phone back a moment. "The song just debuted last night, and-and it's a hit! It's already being requested all over the place, and it's sold over a million on iTunes in the last twelve hours."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, have you heard it?"

"No, not yet, but I'm sure I will. The numbers look good then?"

"Good? Beca, it's golden. Well, platinum actually. Ringtone sales are through the roof. Hal's moving up the video shoot to next Friday afternoon. Frank will be down in the morning. We'll be here at the studio. Are you working today?"

"A few tracks for Jay. Why?"

"Well, we're having dinner tonight to celebrate, so meet us down at Denise's at seven. Jesse and Ashley will be meeting us there. Will Stacie be coming?"

"Huh? No, she left for Santa Monica this morning."

"Oh, right. The shoot. Where are you anyway?"

"Came out to get some fresh air. Breakfast."

"Oh, okay, well I'll see you tonight then."

"Okay, Bree, I'll see you."

Beca hung up and returned to where Chloe was seated. She didn't want to break the news about the single or the contents of it to the redhead just yet, so she refrained from exploding with the news at that moment, ignoring the giddiness raging within. Chloe looked up at her with a smile, and Beca returned it weakly. The redhead stood up, taking Beca's hand gently. They began to walk down the shore. Neither spoke, but they allowed the serenity of the scene to wash over them. The DJ stole glances periodically at her companion, a small smile playing at her lips each time. To find the woman again had been a miracle. She had her only as a friend though, and Beca knew that the most dangerous thing to want of anything was hollow place in her heart echoed with unrelenting desire, the urge to press her lips to the redhead's again, to feel their bodies melding together, to hold her through the night and whisper sweet nothings into her fiery red hair, but she knew now that Chloe wanted none of it. She saw Beca as a friend, only a friend, and that was all she could ever hope to be. She only hoped that one day she could come to terms with this, accept it as enough and indulge in the blessing of having the redhead in her life at all. After all, it is said that when you love someone, your only priority is to see them happy. However, Beca didn't see Chloe to be truly happy. She could only try and make her see that, but she could not force the revelation down her throat and expect her to keep it down. Love didn't work that way. Even emotionally stunted Beca Mitchell knew that. Her father had tried to do so in his many calls from prison during his first months. When he realized his approach was anything but fruitful, he had given up, not calling at all. Aubrey of course would not speak to him, and Jesse only did what his sisters did. It weren't as if the boy really understood, but he lived in a fantasy world just like the movies he watched where everything had a happy ending. Those happy endings did not include kingpin fathers making amends after fifteen years in federal prison. Beca and her siblings did not give it a thought now. It was not worth it to them, and they no longer cared where he had ended up. Their father was lost along with their mother because he had abandoned the family when they needed him most. Aubrey's father had not had a choice. He had died in the war overseas, but in a sense, it was okay because had he been around, she would not have Beca and Jesse. They were the seeds of Warren Mitchell, but they were Aubrey's blood and loved ones nonetheless. They had each other, and it was all that mattered. If their mother could see them now, they chose to believe that she would be proud because Anna Mitchell's most prized moral was family.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Chloe asked suddenly as she looked over the oceanfront, pulling Beca from her reverie.

"Huh?" Beca replied before registering the question. "Oh, yeah, it is."

"Are you okay, Becs?"

"Yeah, I'm great. What are your plans for today?"

"Nothing much. Maybe I'll catch up on my reading."

"Oh, that's right. You're still a bookworm."

Chloe lightly swatted her arm with the hand not holding Beca's as the brunette chuckled.

"You say it like it's a bad thing," the redhead pouted.

"I never said anything of the sort," Beca defended, feigning shock with a hand to her chest.

"You don't read?"

"Yeah, all of the time. Lyrics, music sheets, waveforms, chord progressions."

"You don't read any books?"

"No."

"Let me guess. You just watch the movies."

"I don't like movies."

"What!" Chloe jerked them to a stop now. "You don't like movies? Your brother-"

"Yeah, I know, and I tolerate his as best as I can but I'm just not all into them. Well, the ones with the predictable endings, you know." Beca began walking again, stringing Chloe along.

"Everyone deserves a happy ending, B."

"Exactly, but not everyone gets their happy ending."

"What's your happy ending, B?"

"I don't predict. Hence, hating the predictable."

In her mind, Beca knew exactly what her happy ending would be. She would be with Chloe, but she of course could not admit that. They reached the car at that moment, and Beca opened the door for Chloe to get in. She then rounded the car to enter through the driver side.

"Well I'm sure your unpredictable ending will be happy nonetheless," Chloe remarked casually.

"Yeah, maybe," was Beca's only reply as she brought the engine to life. "Maybe yours will be too. If you let it be."

The cryptic reply did not go unnoticed by Chloe, but she only smiled at the comment while they pulled out of the parking lot, the sun now higher in the sky over the mountains. As they drove, Chloe turned up the radio, singing to a Demi Lovato song. Beca's face had been adorned with an amused grin. Then her face contorted into shock as the song faded out, and the radio DJ's voice floated through the speakers.

"_..._and we have a special gift for ya'll to ring in your Saturday morning! We have a new joint fresh out the oven from your favorite DJ, artist and producer. This track was released only twelve hours ago, but it is the hottest, most requested single on the radio right now, but what do you expect from America's most prestigious DJ and her partner in crime? So, without further ado, here's LA's own, DJ Titanium B featuring Frank Ocean with Novacane!"

Beca's hands tensed around the wheel. This was not how she pictured hearing the track debut on the radio. She had never expected for it to come on with Chloe sitting beside her, in an enclosed space, a car, her car. She had expected to at least have time to tell Chloe about it before she heard it, maybe to explain the lyrics and emotions in it. She had had Frank take the first verse for a reason. The first verse was the realest, the one with the most truth of Beca's situation two years ago, and Chloe would not be able to miss the fact that it was about her. I mean, the title really said it all. She did not need to hear the words to know that. Beca understood this, but there was no turning back. She confirmed this as Chloe's head whipped towards her, eyebrow high and nearly touching her hairline. She slowly turned up the radio as the song began to play, eyes never leaving the brunette DJ. She was still listening intently to every word as Beca kept her eyes fixed straight ahead, unsure of how the redhead would take it. It wasn't bad. Of course it wasn't bad, but it was so real, and the emotion conveyed in the song would speak truths that Beca couldn't readily explain or admit to, not now, not after she had been conclusively friend zoned in the most finalizing manner. It was either too late or too early, but either way, it was the most horrible timing, and Beca was only seconds from panic mode because she could feel those piercing deep blue eyes burning a hole straight through the side of her skull. The anxiety crept up as Frank's voice flooded the Camaro, and the vehicle had never felt so small to the brunette.

_I think I started somethin', I got what I wanted_

_Did did not I can't feel nothin', superhuman_

_Even when I'm f*****' Viagra poppin', every single record autotunin'_

_Zero emotion, muted emotion, pitch corrected, computed emotion_

_I blame it on the model broad with the Hollywood smile_

_Stripper booty and a rack like wow, Brain like Berkeley_

_Met her at Coachella, I went to see Jigga, she went to see Z Trip, perfect_

_I took a seat on the ice cold lawn, she handed me a ice blue bong, whatever_

_She said she wanna be a dentist really badly, she's in school payin'_

_For tuition doin' porn in the Valley, at least she workin'_

_But girl I can't feel my face, what are we smokin' anyway_

_She said don't let the high go to waste, but can you taste a little taste of_

_Novocaine, baby, baby, Novocaine, baby, I want you_

_Love me good, Love me long, Love me numb_

_Love me now, when I'm gone, love me none_

_Love me none, love me none, numb, numb, numb, numb_

By now, Chloe was in a trance of shock and awe. Her hand was clamped over her mouth. Beca was just driving. She completely forgot where she was supposed to be heading to. When she remembered that Chloe's car was at the gym, she quickly made a turn towards it, crossing two lanes and nearly causing a collision in the process. Chloe was oblivious to it however as Beca's voice now wafted through the speakers full of real and passionate emotion, raw and heart-wrenching feeling that had the redhead's heart racing. Still, there was no way to read Chloe's eyes through the rearview mirror, and Beca was much too frightened to steal a sideways glance in her direction at the moment. Her body was livid with fear, and she only wished she had put in a CD or her iPod or something because Aubrey had pretty much just warned her. She had said herself that she was sure she would hear it. How could she be so stupid? What the hell was going to happen when the song ended?

_Sink full of dishes pacin' in the kitchen, cocaine for breakfast, yikes_

_Bed full of women, flip on a tripod, little red light on shootin', I'm feelin' like_

_Stanley Kubrick, this is some visionary shit_

_Been tryna film pleasure with my eyes wide shut but it keeps on movin'_

_I blame it on the model broad with the Hollywood smile_

_Stripper booty with the rack like wow, I'll never forget ya_

_You put me on a feelin' I never had, never had, never had_

_And ever since I've been tryna get it back, pick it up and put it back_

_Now I'm somethin' like the chemist on campus_

_But there's no drug around, quite like what I found in you_

_I still can't feel my face, what am I smokin' anyway_

_She said don't let the high go to waste but can you taste a little taste of_

_Novocaine, baby, baby, Novocaine, baby, I want you_

_Love me good, Love me long, Love me numb_

_Love me now, when I'm gone, love me none_

_Love me none, love me none, numb, numb, numb, numb_

As the final bridge began, Beca shakily pulled a joint from the middle console, lighting it up with trembling hands. She fumbled the lighter several times before succeeding with the task, and she took a number of deep inhales before ever pulling the joint from her lips. She wondered how much of the nervous anxiety her brother was now sensing because her body was overloaded.

_Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine,_

_Numb the pain, Numb the pain, Numb the pain, Numb the pain, Numb the pain,_

_Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine,_

_For the pain, for the pain, Novocaine, Novocaine_

_Novocaine for the pain_

_Pretty girls involved with me_

_Makin' pretty love to me pretty, pity pity_

_All the pretty girls involved with me_

_Makin' pretty love to me pretty, pity pity_

_I can't feel a thing,_

_I can't feel, can't feel a thing._

_Can't feel a thing, can't feel, feel, feel, feel her._

_I can't feel, feel her,_

_Novocaine, Novocaine, Novocaine._

_I can't feel, feel her,_

_Novocaine for the pain, for the pain._

_I can't, can't feel her, feel her, feel her._

_Novocaine, Novocaine, caine, caine, caine_.

Beca pulled into the parking lot of the gym, parking beside Chloe's car in the back of the building but not daring to kill the engine. The song soon faded out, the radio DJ coming back on.

"There it is, folks! The new banger from DJ Titanium B and Frank Ocean, debuting at the top of the charts this morning! Make sure you purchase that track on iTunes right NOW because it's the hottest thing out! If you would like to request that track, you know what to do! Now, we have up next Pink featuring..."

The radio faded out, Chloe slowly turning the dial. Beca could not handle the tension now descending down into the car, and she killed the engine, stepping out of the vehicle and leaning heavily against the gym wall. Chloe did not step out right away. She sat still in her seat, letting the lyrics sink into her head. Beca could not bare to glance in her direction, dreading what would come when Chloe at last opened the door. All that Beca could think was that someway, somehow, this would change everything. It wasn't a top hit to her. It wasn't another great masterpiece by DJ Titanium B. It was Beca Mitchell laid bare in front of Chloe Beale right now, the ambitious Berkeley grad dentist that had left her alone in a hotel room with only a sticky note and a bag of laced weed two years ago. It was a girl who had broken the heart that Beca didn't even know still functioned in such a weak way, a heart that Chloe continued to break each day she gave Beca that megawatt grin before reminding the DJ that it had not been her that the redhead had chosen. It was a reminder that she had been nothing more than a college girl's play thing for a weekend, but Beca didn't need a reminder, did she? She had plenty, more than enough, all of them which she would throw away in a heartbeat because the pain was reaching the status level of intolerable. The sweet dreams and beautiful nightmares, the melodic voice and ear-shattering music. It was all one in the same, and it took Beca so high while at the same time dragging her so low. It was pure, unadulterated torture that Beca could not escape from, and she wondered if she had really been such a bad person that she deserved this for the rest of eternity. She found herself wishing, pleading with herself to love Stacie the way Stacie loved her, to fall in love with the model and be happy, be content. She begged for mercy there and now, but relief had yet to come. Her heart pounding against her ribcage, threatening to shatter each and every one of the bones before bursting forth from her chest. That would be too easy though. That would not be enough, and Beca only wanted it to end because this was not her.

Jesse always spoke about true love and the signs of it, but he never said it was anything like this. She despised his movies more so now because they had been complete lies. They never said love hurt this bad, that you can feel yourself crack and crumble and shatter over someone that you never really had. They never said it would tear you apart from the inside out and leave you so breathless yet you could not escape it if you tried. It wasn't a wound you could just douse in tequila and stitch up. It was not like getting wisdom teeth pulled. Beca would rip out her own teeth if it meant ridding herself of the emotional pain because this was so much worse, and Beca Mitchell had no idea it could happen to her because she had been sure that she was Titanium, bulletproof, immovable, untouchable, immortal, invincible. Yet, all it took was one redhead and an ice blue bong to prove her wrong. How pathetic was she?

At last, Beca was yanked from her thoughts as the passenger door of the Camaro opened. She felt the searing heat of the lit joint at her fingertips, realizing the joint had burnt down. It fell from her fingers quickly. She didn't think before she looked up, and she found herself looking into deep, piercing cerulean blue orbs, orbs that did not look happy or flattered or relieved or anything else in the positive sense at all, not in the least. Beca had try and lighten the mood however, so she slightly tilted her head, arms spread at her side as she threw on a grin.

"Surprise!" she chimed.

And nothing in the redhead's face changed.


	8. When In Doubt, Wing It, No Seriously

**_A/N: So here we go with another chapter. A lot of inner conflict with our lead girls. This song at the beginning is another written by yours truly. Working again inspired me, so I wanted to make it more personal for myself. Its funny because even my artists are digging the story, so Ive been having them proofread the chapters. Let me know how you're liking it. _**

* * *

_Conveying my emotions is a notion I regret_

_I try to to stomp it out but then I catch whiff of your scent_

_Is this the happy ending that you told me would arrive_

_Ive been missing you for years and you haven't missed me yet_

_Haha, yet, as if there's still a chance of such events_

_Smoke another spliff because the room's become so tense_

_I look through you, those baby blues clouding up my mind_

_It was your plan all along, and I was one step behind_

* * *

"Wh-what was that, Beca?" Chloe sputtered, a single tear falling from her eye.

"It-was-was my new song," Beca replied as if it was as simple and obvious as that.

"No, really. What was that?"

"I-it's-ugh," she rubbed her face in frustration. "What do you want me to say, Chloe?"

"That-that was about-"

"Yes, it was about the concert, about us. I mean, you and I, like the two of us, like-"  
Chloe put a finger up to shush her. "You exploited us?"

"No, I-I wouldn't call it that. I mean, when I got home after that first appointment, the full song was just playing in my head, so I laid it out."

"Well, you did sing it while you were drugged up."

"I did?"

Her face contorted with confusion and shock, and Chloe couldn't help but giggle. Giggling's good. "Yeah, you did, and you said you would get Frankie to sing it."

"Wow, I mean, yeah. When it played in my head, he's the one I pictured on it."

"But-that first verse was-all about-_us._ Yet, you didn't take that one. Why?"

Of course Chloe would notice. "I-I don't know. I didn't wanna make it too real, you know?"

"No, I don't know."

"Look, Chloe-" She took a deep breath, deciding it was best to play it off and not admit the truth. "It was just a song, okay? It sounded good. It obviously is. It was an idea on my mind. I went with it. That's what I do. Inspiration hits, I make a song."

"It was-just a song? That's it?"

"Is it that bad?"

"What? No, I just. I-but, did you mean all that stuff?"  
Beca continued on in her distant fashion. "What stuff? Chloe, they're words. That's it."

"Oh, right." The redhead chuckled nervously now, embarrassed for her assumption. "Right, I-I don't know why I'm getting so worked up. I'm sorry. I just-"

"No, it's fine. It's okay. I mean, I was a bit scared at the reaction because I had planned to surprise you, but you know."

"Surprise me?"

"Yeah, I mean, you inspired it, right? You're a great friend."

What neither one was aware of was how bitter those words tasted on Beca's tongue and how piercing they were on Chloe's heart. Yet, they both shared a fake smile because neither was going to take a leap. Both would never look in the mirror and admit they were cowards, but it was in fact the truth. Happy endings didn't happen to cowards, and Beca never expected it to.

"Thanks," Chloe managed in a hoarse voice. "Thank you. It's an amazing song."

"Well uh," Beca's mouth was not synchronized with her mind now, only her heart as she made a proposal. "We're actually celebrating the release tonight at Denise's. Would you like to come?" Chloe's eyes widened, and Beca quickly backpedaled. "I mean, you don't have to. You're not obligated to go. I just figured-it's just the family-but I-"

"What about Stacie?" That's the only reason she hesitated at all.

"Oh, she's in Santa Monica for the weekend, but I mean, it wouldn't matter. I want you to be part of it, you know."

"Oh, yeah, of course. Y-yeah, I'll go."

"Really?" Beca hated sounding so small, but Chloe only giggled.

"Yeah, really."

"Okay, how about I pick you up at about quarter to seven?"

"Okay, I'll text you the address."

"Yeah, okay."

"See you later then, B."

"Later, Chlo."

With that, the redhead hugged the DJ, pressing a lingering kiss to her cheek before rushing to her car, but all Beca could think was how much longer she could take this because she was falling apart. Chloe on the other hand wasn't sure how to feel. Beca had said it was just a song. It didn't mean anything, but the passion would say otherwise. When Beca would rap or sing, it was always passionate, but this song was so much more powerful than that. Maybe it was the fact she had lived it or the fact that she was the subject of the matter, but somehow, she felt those words deep within her. However, Beca had said it was only a song, and Chloe would settle for that because she was much to scared to think anymore of it. That's where it would stay.

* * *

Beca robotically worked on the current instrumental for Jay-Z's album. Her eyes drooped of their own accord as her fingers slowly moved across the faders and levers on the console. She had been at it for the better part of seven hours, trying to keep the building anxiety in her body at bay, but she could not get into it, and she knew she would have to do a lot of editing on the music later. As she lit up another joint in frustration, her sixth of the day, the door to the studio opened and in stalked big sister with furious eyes. Beca looked up at her, and she cringed at the expression now adorning Aubrey's features. It was not so much fury as it was disappointed question, and Beca knew that Aubrey may have just connected some dots. Or hounded Jesse. Or called the dental office.

"So you didn't sound as excited as I would have projected when I called earlier," she started, "And now I know why. I know what the song was about, and I-"

At that, the most unpredictable event to ever take place in front of Aubrey Posen occurred. It shocked the hell out of both of them, but there was no way to stop it. Beca could not hold her reserve any longer, and it crumbled around her as she leaned over, face in her hands and body shaking with sobs. Aubrey was in shock. Never had her sister so viciously broken down about anything with so many tears, not even the loss of their mother. Never had she been ground down to this vulnerable and fearful state, and it terrified Aubrey because it had to be something horrid. She kneeled in front of Beca, hands on the brunette's legs as she awaited some sort of understanding. Beca quickly began swiping tears away when she realized what had happened, her mind quickly fabricating a believable explanation. She took a deep hit of the joint, head lolling back to blow the smoke up in the air. Aubrey continued to wait, fingers now gripping her sister's legs with pleading eyes. When Beca gave the blonde her own expectant look, Aubrey figured that the DJ wanted her to continue with her discovery, so she did so.

"The dentist," she breathed. "The Berkeley dentist. The redhead from the concert. It was her. I really listened to the song when we hung up, like really listened because from the time you recorded it, I could feel that it meant more to you than anything ever had. It was different. The story started to make sense, and you pitched it to Frank the night after you had your teeth removed. At first, I just thought that going to the dentist triggered the memory. Then I went on the website, and Chloe Beale is registered. It's her, isn't it?" Beca only nodded slightly, taking another drag. "Beca, what did she do to you?" This is where the lie came in.

"N-nothing, Bree," she croaked. "It was me. I ran away that weekend after the concert. I-I didn't want that, but then, when she was gone, and I had no way to find her, the dreams started. She haunted me every minute of every day for two years, but you know me. I couldn't face it because that isn't me. I don't fall for anyone much less a weekend fling, and there was no way I could handle that truth. Then she did the extraction because the other dentist had to run off, and it all came back full force when I saw her again. I mean, it wasn't like it had faded at all, but at least before I saw her again, I could pretend that she was just a dream girl, that she wasn't real and I just wanted her to be, and I could deal with a fantasy. Now it's real, but she has a doctor boyfriend, but she's with him out of obligation, and I-I can't even-I can't take that chance."

Aubrey sighed, reaching up and cupping her sister's cheeks. It was uncharacteristic because they almost never consoled one another in such fashion. The last time Aubrey had ever looked upon her sister with such empathy was at their mother's funeral, and even then, it was short lived because it never felt right. Neither wanted pity. Beca had not even allowed herself to cry at the burial. She had floated through it before drowning herself in music. They would give every ounce of pity to Jesse if any and console him, not each other. They were tough. Yet, here they were, and Aubrey knew that all she could do was try to understand her sister.

"I-I don't know how to help you because neither of us have ever been in love," she breathed, and they both chuckled sadly. "I just-if you love her, you have to be there for her, B. You have to be whatever she needs you to be, and it may not always be as much as you want, but it's better than nothing, you know."

"I-I just-" Beca began, trying to find the words. "I-I'm falling for her deeper and harder every single moment, and I don't know how long I can do that, Bree. Plus, I'm hurting Stacie. She knows that something is different, but I-I don't want to tell her and hurt her when Chloe isn't going to be with me."

Aubrey scoffed. "There are so many things wrong with that logic. Beca, you're settling with Stacie, and she's sticking with you because she loves you, because she thinks that you love her too. She thinks that one day you'll love her as much as she loves you, but you can't do that when you're falling for someone else. You-you can't just drag her through the mud because it will only hurt worse in the end. All you can do is tell her the truth. Whether or not she chooses to stay is up to her, but you have to give her a choice. She deserves that much."

"Wh-what if she hates me?" Beca froze. "Oh my gosh. That sounded so queerballs. What is happening to me?"

Aubrey chuckled, patting her arm. "She's been there for you for five years, Beca. I don't think she could ever hate you, not forever."

Beca snorted a laugh. "Yeah, I'll-figure it out. Well, now that you're here, I-uh, I invited her tonight."

"Chloe?"

"Yeah, and she said yes."

"Is that where you were this morning?" Her face now harnessed a knowing smirk.

"Yeah, we had breakfast."

"Why didn't you just tell me?"

"Because you're my protective big sister that-"

"That's going to tell you right now to be careful because you're giving her the power to destroy you, and I do not want to see you broken because I wouldn't know what the hell to do other than beat the living shit out of her, and if she even begins to lead you on and give you hope for more than she intends to give you, I will skin her alive and hang her over the Hollywood sign."

Beca only gaped at her sister as the blonde stood and ironed out her shirt with her hands. Aubrey gave her a smug look before raising her eyebrows, awaiting the confirmation of understanding. Beca nodded slowly.

"Okay, good then," she huffed. "Now, are you almost ready?"

Beca quirked an eyebrow before her eyes bulged, jumping up out of her chair.

"Shit! What time is it?" she burst, grabbing for her phone.

"Two minutes past six."

"I have to go pick up Chloe. I'll meet you guys there."

"Okay. Go through the kitchen. I know that paparazzi will be lurking after the song success. I already let Denise know you would be taking that route and for good reason since you're bringing Chloe along."

"Right. Okay, yeah, see you in a bit."

Beca followed the directions that the GPS system dictated to her, arriving in the lot of an apartment complex about fifteen minutes west of the dentist office and quite a ways from the studio. Still, she was two minutes early. She shot Chloe a quick text that she had arrived and stepped out of the car. She opened the back door, pulling off her hoodie and pulling on a plaid blue and white shirt to match the teal blue chucks on her feet. When she turned around, running a hand through her hair to smooth it out, she froze. Her jaw fell to the floor when she took in the sight before her. Chloe was in a form-fitting teal blue dress that ran to her knees. Her hair cascading around her shoulders in perfection, and the color of the garment made her eyes pop. The thin straps of the dress were hidden by fiery locks, and the black heels she wore accentuated her toned calves. Beca couldn't even process the image. It had her speechless. Chloe beamed at her as she approached.

"We match!" she squealed, hugging the DJ and kissing her cheek.

"Totally an accident," Beca smirked before her face fell. "Uh, did you-I mean, uh-Tom-"

"Oh, he's at work. No worries."

"Oh, okay. Uh, you look-amazing, Chloe. You're beautiful."

"Thank you. You look pretty stunning yourself."

Beca scoffed. "Please."

Chloe's face remained serious. "I mean it."

Beca said nothing more, instead quickly opening the passenger door for Chloe, and the redhead's heart fluttered. Tom never opened doors for her. Tom never complimented her unless her parents or another audience were present. He never cared to let her know how beautiful she was, and here was Beca, using all of the courage she could muster to do so. Chloe could see it in her eyes that it was hard for her to be brave in such situations, and the redhead was grateful, but that was all she could be.

"So who are we meeting?" the redhead asked as they headed off.

"Everyone," Beca replied simply. "I think the only ones you haven't met yet are Lily, our label receptionist and assistant, and Benji. He's the, uh, botanist and Jesse's best friend. He's a cool guy though, smart as hell, but-don't diss Star Wars around him. That's means for a slow and painful death."

Chloe's eyes widened. "Really now?"

Beca chuckled. "Yeah, really."

"Okay, I'll remember that."

"You should. Oh, and Donald. Donald is our artist. He came to the label right after that concert, and we dropped his album."

"You mean D-Mize?"

"Yup, that's him."

"That album was amazing. Trust me. You turned me into a hip-hop head, B."  
Beca snorted. "Good."

"So like, Aubrey will be there?"

The DJ barked a laugh that made Chloe flinch. "Yeah, and I told her earlier that you were coming, so stop being so scared. She's fine with it."

"She didn't even like me before then I walked out on you. How could she be okay with it?"

"Because I didn't tell her all that."

"What? Why?"

"Because she doesn't need to know, Chloe. That's not her business."

"But I-"

"Chloe, what? You want her to hate you?"

"No, but-I don't think I deserve to be spared from the wrath of your big sister."

"It's fine. I want her to like you because I like you." Beca's face immediately flushed at her words while Chloe only chuckled. "I mean-I-"

"I like you too, Becs. No worries."

And Beca knew that they meant two different things, but she refrained from dwelling on it because it would not help a thing. She just had to grit and bare the jolt in her chest because that's what Chloe wanted, and what the one you love wants, the one you love gets.

"How is Jesse then?" Chloe asked now, feeling the mood shift.

"Oh, he's great," Beca replied. "He's working at Warner Brothers now like I said, but he just got word that they might let him write the script for the new 'Man of Steel' movie, so he's stoked."

"Superheroes of course." They both chuckled.

"Yup, that's my brother. He had a meeting with them earlier today."

"Well, he's a great guy. I miss hanging with them."

"Well, we can always hang out, you know."

"Yeah, we should maybe do this more often. Or, we could like, triple date."

Beca froze, hands gripping the steering wheel desperately. She had no idea what to say. She couldn't even imagine sitting across from Tom and Chloe, being the audience for his charming and loving facade. No, she could not do it. Thankfully, her phone rang. She fumbled with the device as she took it from the cup holder with haste, seeing it was her sister saving her ass once again. Chloe could see how flustered Beca was, but she said nothing.

"Yeah," was Beca's squeak of a greeting.

"B, where are you?" Aubrey asked, haste in her stern tone.

"Give us about five minutes. Traffic and all."

"Where does she live? San Diego!"

"Chill out there, Bree." She chuckled nervously. "We're almost there."

"Okay, well everyone's here except Frank, but he should be here shortly."

"Okay, I'll see you in a bit."

Beca hung up slowly, dropping the device back into the cup holder before turning her eyes back on the road. Chloe smiled over at her.

"She's going to be mad I made you late," the redhead quipped.

"Huh?" Beca returned. "No, of course not. She just-is impatient nine times out of ten, but she understands. I left the studio late. Had she not shown up there, I would have been much later because I lost track of time, so yeah."

Chloe only smiled that warm smile that made Beca's heart soar, and the nerves were quickly ascending without the brunette's immediate knowledge. This was how it would always be, wasn't it? She would always be a wreck as Chloe's friend. It would never get better, and she would forever be drowning in it. No, she had to lock it up and get used to being the friend, the one beside Chloe when she married her douchebag of a boyfriend and probably DJ'ed the reception. Yeah, that was Beca's role. No use denying it.

They arrived at Denise's restaurant shortly after seven, and Beca parked in the back where the staff did. She knocked twice on the kitchen door, and it was immediately opened by Jessica, another friend of Ashley's and Denise's that helped Denise manage the place. She smiled widely at them.

"Hey, B!" she greeted.

"Hey, Jess," Beca replied.

"Right this way. Everyone's waiting for you."

"Great."

When they reached the table in the back, Beca found that everyone was indeed waiting on them. There was Jesse, Aubrey, Ashley, Benji, Luke, Donald, Lily, Cynthia Rose and Frank. Bottles of various liquors in buckets of ice were strategically set across the table, and the group stood to greet the two newcomers. Jesse's eyes were wide with shock before softening to relief when he saw Chloe. He embraced her like a long-lost friend, letting her know he was so happy to see her. She chuckled and expressed the same. Ashley hugged her as well, and then Beca introduced her to Benji. He gave her his warm grin everyone knew and loved before she moved on to say hi to Cynthia Rose and Luke. Lily gave her a silent wave and a smile as greeting. Even Aubrey hugged the redhead however, and Beca beamed at her sister with all of the love and pride in the world. Aubrey acted as if she didn't notice. The DJ then introduced Chloe to Donald, who gave her a charming smile and complimented her with a "you're beautiful". Beca gave him a warning glare from behind the redhead however, and he immediately retracted, Jesse snickering. Chloe then reached Frank, and her eyes bulged. Beca and the man chuckled as the DJ tip-toed and slung a shoulder over his arm.

"Frankie, this is Chloe," she introduced. "Chloe, this is Frank Ocean."

"It's nice to meet you, Chloe," he greeted, shaking her hand as she gawked at him.

"Drooling is very rude, dear." Beca reached up to shut Chloe's mouth, who pouted as the table chuckled.

"This is her, right? The girl from the song."

Beca's eyes widened. "What are you-"

"B, B, B. I know you, and I know your music, and that song wasn't just a song." Oh, boy. Frank had no idea what he was doing. "I remember seeing her with you at the show though at Coachella that year. She's beautiful. You take care of her, champ." Beca grimaced. "And Chloe." He turned to the redhead now. "Keep inspiring her. She's making hits, but none have ever been as big as this. You go, girl."  
"Thank-you," Chloe breathed.

"Okay!" Beca sighed, clapping her hands together as Jesse and Aubrey looked on bewildered. "Liquor. Let's pour the liquor. What do we got?"

"Chardonnay," Ashley squealed with delight.

"Ooh, I'll take some of that," Chloe agreed, and Ashley poured her a glass.

"Let me get that Ace of Spades," Beca said to Jesse, her brother handing her the bottle of Jay-Z's newest investment, fine champagne going at three hundred dollars a bottle. "Mmm, good."

"That's Jay-Z's brand, right?" Chloe inquired.

"Yeah," Beca replied. "It's amazing."

"I'll try that next."

As everyone poured their champagne, Denise came over to take their orders. She did her usual flirting with Cynthia Rose, which everyone was used to by now, before jotting down everyone's preferences. Chloe quirked an eyebrow at the shameless flirting, and Beca only gave her a nod. Beca decided to do CR a solid now.

"Hey, Denise," she called.

"Yeah, B," the owner responded instantly, looking up.

"I have a very important request."

"Anything. Go ahead."

"I need a different waitress."

Denise's jaw dropped, and CR shot Beca a questioning glance because it sounded a lot like Beca wanted to trade Denise for another waitress. What the hell?

"Wha-is there something wrong?" Denise asked nervously, biting her lip.

"Yes, there is!" Beca shrieked. "We come in here all of the time, and you take amazing care of us, and tonight we're celebrating, and you're waiting on us when you should be sitting at this damn table! Now, go turn in the orders and get back here."

Everyone chuckled as Denise's face went from fear to disbelief to excitement, a cheek-splitting grin spreading across her face. Beca smirked.

"That's an order," she went on.

"Really?" Denise asked.

"Really. I mean, come on. Get Jessica over here too, and order a meal. Chop chop."

Cynthia Rose reached over and bumped her DJ's fist once Denise walked off to fetch Jessica and a new waitress. The group howled with laughter.

"You owe her big time, mate," Luke alerted CR.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," the CEO huffed. "Well worth it though."

"Of course it is."

Chloe smiled over at the DJ, who was sipping her wine coolly. She couldn't help it. The grin only grew wider with each passing second. There was so much more to Beca than the music. She knew that. She had the biggest heart beneath that badass facade, and Chloe wasn't sure how much longer she could possibly deny that.

"That was really sweet of you," the redhead whispered to Beca.

"Oh, it was nothing," Beca assured her, setting down her glass.

"No, it was. I mean, you freaked her out a lot at first, but did you see that smile? You made her day, Beca."

"Well, she's a friend, a good one, and she always accommodates us in every way possible. This is our place, and I can't count how many times she let me stay in here after closing hours to work on song lyrics and drink some good liquor. She would let me smoke in this back room, and she would sit with me sometimes. Jessica would be off of the clock, but she would stay late just to get me drinks or sit with me. She would cook me a meal, Alfredo of course because I would never make the order. I would insist she not do it, but she did it anyway. They're good people, and I'm glad that we know them, but-Denise started running this place really young. Her grandmother raised her, and she started working in here at thirteen. Her grandmother named the restaurant after her. She started it when Denise was three. Her mother left her with her grandma one day when she was a few weeks old, said she would be right back. She never came back though. Still, Denise took more and more responsibility here as the years went on, and her grandma got older. Then, when she graduated high school, she started on her business degree. Before she started her junior year at UCLA, her grandmother passed away. She took over the place, but she still finished school. Jessica helped her with her classes, Ashley and Benji too the way they helped Jesse when our mom died. They helped her at the restaurant as well, and they tried to do it for free, but she wasn't raised that way. They took the jobs then when they weren't in school. She got her business and accounting degree, and now she runs it full time with Jessica."

"That's amazing," Chloe gasped.

"Yeah, it is. She's amazing."

"So are you, DJ."

Chloe subconsciously reached over beneath the table and grabbed Beca's hand. Beca tensed for a moment but relaxed under the contact. Her body did it without permission, and she looked away as her cheeks flushed. Her thumb softly stroked Chloe's smooth fingers. They were not aware of the glances Aubrey kept throwing in their direction or the knowing look in Jesse's eyes, but even if they were, they would only brush it off because they could not acknowledge the truth. Even when it came out of Frank's mouth, even when everyone at the table knew it, they played oblivious to it because they knew they could not handle it, not now.

Denise and Jessica arrived moments later, pulling up two chairs and sitting between Luke and Cynthia Rose. Conversation flowed nicely then as they awaited their food. Benji and Jesse talked about the new 'Man of Steel' movie which Beca insisted on toasting to when her brother revealed that he had in fact been hired to write the script. Everyone raised a glass in congratulations, and Jesse embraced his sister. It was her night, and yet she was giving him the spotlight. The boyish grin on his face said it all, and she knew it meant a lot to him when she could show him how proud she was. He was even more enthused when Chloe began asking a slew of questions about the movie, and he answered each as if it were a TV interview. Frank and Beca talked about the single and how they felt about the debut. Luke chatted with Aubrey about the moves they would be making soon and what the next step would be for Beca. It was a very relaxing atmosphere, and Beca's nerves had thankfully subsided into the background, due to be faced at a later time. She didn't even feel the need to smoke. She drank her champagne and indulged in the company and praise she was getting from all sides, Chloe's hand still resting on her lap. The table went through their appetizers before giving the kitchen the okay to get their entrees started. Beca had wanted to spread it out so that they could enjoy the time together. All of them had opened up their schedule for the dinner. The laughing and talking that filled the room was enticing. At times, she, in her buzzing mind, would grab Chloe's hand for a moment, neither acknowledging the electric shock that shot through them each time. She would brush a stray red lock behind the dentist's ear or give her a big smile, and everyone saw this. They saw that Beca looked genuinely happy, and they all knew who the song was for with Frank's help. The night was going beautifully, but Beca should have known better. There was no way that the night could be perfect, and sometimes, when you procrastinate, things start to quicken the pace for you, for themselves. As she refilled Chloe's glass with Ace of Spades as well as her own, a voice called out from behind them as they entered the private dining section.

"Hey, guys!" she called. "Sorry, I'm late. I didn't wanna miss it, so I rushed back from the shoot."

Beca knew who it was, and she nearly fumbled the glass in her hands. She set it down quickly, eyes immediately jetting up to look at her sister across from her, praying she had not heard right. However, the nervous glances now going around the table confirmed her suspicions. She was in fact right, and she was thrust into what would have to be an awkward situation. Aubrey only gave her shocked look whereas Jesse looked sympathetic. Slowly, Beca turned around, and she was met with a leggy brunette who had an award-winning smile on her face as she approached the table. The DJ stood up slowly.

"Stacie," Beca breathed before forcing a smile. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

"I wasn't going to miss this!" the model assured her as she reached the DJ. "I heard the record on the radio, and I called Luke straight away. He said you guys were meeting here for dinner." Luke had never looked so ashamed or guilty in his life. "I hope you guys haven't eaten yet, I'm-"

She stopped as she reached out to take the chair beside Beca and realized it was occupied. Chloe looked up with a smile to meet her eyes, and something told Stacie that this girl was someone that should not be there, someone that she was not meant to meet, someone that had something to do with the way Beca had been acting. Oh, the joys of women's intuition.

"Oh," she squeaked. "Who is this?"

"Stacie," Beca sighed with a smile to show Chloe she wasn't afraid although internally, she was freaking the hell out. "This is Chloe."

And the name struck recognition, realization because Stacie now knew exactly who Chloe was, and it was not her perfume.


	9. It's For the Best but Whose Best?

**_A/N: SO I WASNT GONNA UPDATE AGAIN TONIGHT, BUT YOU CAN THANK THE GUEST WHO LEFT THIS REVIEW:_**

_"Hey, I just read this and this is crazy but here's my review so update maybe? Seriously though this is awesome! Hope you update soon cause I'm SO HOOKED!"_

**_BAHAHAHA SO I HAD TO DO IT! _****So**_** another opening verse by yours truly. I guess with work it comes natural again. I know that hip hop usually isnt the thing here, but that's why i used it. its my livelihood, and I knew Beca would fit in well because "when you think hip-hop, you think Anna Kendrick". Or in this case, Beca Mitchell so yeah**_

* * *

_Aggressive tears are not a very good incentive_

_Modify the details of the blueprint presented_

_Loves hardly prevented from at least one side of friendship_

_But long before the crush, I made a vow & ill protect it_

_Ive kept it, maybe one day youll widen your selection_

_Probably could huh? If my ass wasnt so reckless_

_All I see is perfection, how can any man pass it up_

_See Im gon kill this game, spent 12 years gassing up_

_I want you beside me, you were there before I blew up_

_No more waitin at the door for bouncers to approve us_

_We stepped up in the city, and everybody knew us_

_I just wanna see you draped in all white, queued up_

_I hate seein you fuss, but you trust all I say_

_I was damned since the start, nowadays here I pray_

_When you find somethin to believe in, you strive to be a better man_

_It feels like young love, baby, you can wear my letterman_

* * *

Beca shook Stacie's hand off of her knee for what had to be at least the fourth time, ignoring the glare being shot from the aforementioned party each time she did so. She continued to laugh though rather nervously, and she included Chloe in every discussion because she knew Chloe felt just as uncomfortable as her. The others helped her as well. Cynthia Rose talked music with the redhead, Donald enjoying her praise of his album. Her and Ashley talked about their college days. Her and Benji talked magic tricks, and Jesse joined them in the superhero and movie discussion. Beca and Luke debated on whether or not they should start a clothing line or a liquor brand. It was all fun and games, but as Stacie's irritation ascended, the main topic would become a lit match for her short fuse.

"So," Cynthia Rose sighed as their entrees were delivered. "The single."

"The single!" Frank boomed with a laugh. "The reason we're here. Let's get straight to the point. B, you made magic, kid. Best thing I've ever worked on."

"Hey, you made the track," B insisted with a laugh.

"Are you kidding me? Well, I'm pretty sure that it's obvious who made the track, but I don't have to say, now do I?" He gave Beca a knowing a smirk, and she was only glad he didn't say it.

"Nope, you do not."

"No, tell us," Stacie now prompted, anger already boiling over, causing the table to freeze.

"Well-" Frank started, hand waving frantically as he was taken aback by her sudden request, oblivious to rivalry before him seated at their table.

"B obviously made the song. I mean, the music, the lyrics, everything."

"Well, _Baby._" She turned her eyes on Beca. "Where did you get such inspiration from? I mean, I heard the song on the drive back, and I figured it was deeper than your normal stuff."

Beca's eyes bulged as she took a long sip of her champagne before setting it down.

"Well," she sighed before a breathless laugh. "Drugs."

The table chuckled, trying to help Beca out as she joked, Frank reaching over to pat her shoulder. With a fidgeting Chloe and an enraged Stacie flanking her, she wasn't sure what else to do or say. Stacie was not done however.

"What about you, Chloe?" she asked in a sickly sweet tone.

"Huh, what?" Chloe replied, surprised by the inquiry.

"The song? What did you think of it?"

"Oh, it's amazing work. I loved it."

"And where do _you _think that the inspiration stems from?"

"Look, I'll tell you all about it later, Stace," Beca attempted but no avail as the model was honed in on the redhead now.

"No, B, I'd like to hear Chloe's opinion."

"Well, I believe the title says it all," Chloe managed. "It's-a drug."

"Yeah, but is it really? I mean, knowing Beca here, she had some sort of abstract idea behind it, don't you think?"

Beca was getting ready to save the day, she swore on it as she took another swig of her glass. Aubrey was giving her an expectant look, pleading with her via big emerald eyes to stop the entire event before it got out of hand. What nobody expected was for Chloe to defend them, for Chloe to stand up for herself and admit to what she already knew to the model.

"It's not abstract at all," Chloe's sharp words came now. "I mean, it tells a story from beginning to end. You know, met her at Coachella. We met at Coachella. I was going to Berkeley for my dental degree, and we smoked something that got us higher than the clouds. Then we made love for three nights, and next thing you know, Beca's good as new."

Every jaw at the table was now in its owner's lap. Stacie was gawking at Beca. Beca was turning a shade of blue from a breath she had been holding as she stared down at her lap. Aubrey's face was tinged green. Chloe was casually sipping her drink. Frank was nervously wiping his mouth with his napkin, and Jesse looked like someone had kicked his puppy.

"So the weekend she ran out on you is what it's based on then?" Stacie now asked with a resurfacing smirk.

"Well, yeah, I guess so," Chloe replied coolly. "If that's how you identify it."

Stacie fumed once more at her nonchalance, but before anymore could be said, the waitress waltzed in to save the day. Somewhat.

"Would you all like to order dessert?" she asked.

Everyone declined swiftly, and CR handed over her credit card in order to pay for the check.

"I'm going out for a smoke," Beca huffed now, standing with Chloe following suit calmly.

"Yeah, I'm with you," Jesse immediately piped up.

"Me too," Frank and Benji agreed, and they headed out to the back of the restaurant.

The others sat in awkward silence for a moment before Jessica and Denise excused themselves to check on their employees. Cynthia Rose and Luke left soon after once CR retrieved her card, and the group dwindled down until only Aubrey and Stacie remained. The brunette's eyes were filled with tears, but Aubrey kept her features schooled as she took the seat beside her. The blonde wasn't sure what to say, but she only wanted to calm the other woman until her and Beca could discuss the matter further.

"Stacie," she said softly. "You're overreacting. It was a long time ago. Chloe has a boyfriend, but she works in the dentist office Beca went to. They're friends. Beca didn't mean for it to go this way, and this dinner was for celebration, not-_this_."

"B-but," Stacie sobbed. "But she-ugh! I-I don't know. I know she cares about her though, Bree. She's been acting weird ever since that appointment, and I always knew there was something. The-the song. It's so obvious. I didn't know all of the details, but I knew she slept with someone that weekend, someone that wasn't me, someone that brought her back to life, and-and it wasn't me."

"Stacie, Beca cares about you. She wanted to explain it to you because she didn't want to hurt you. She was-she was caught off guard."  
Stacie paused a moment. "Oh my gosh. She-I messed everything up."

"Hey, don't worry about it. Just calm down, and you can talk to her when you get home."

She nodded after a second. "Thanks, Bree."

Aubrey forced a smile. "No problem."

Meanwhile, outside, the boys were trying to catch their breath.

"B, I'm so sorry," Frank breathed. "I never meant for-"

"Frank," she halted him, clapping his shoulder. "Do not apologize, bro. I mean, that was childish of her to do, and it doesn't matter. I'm sorry. You didn't know any better. We were having a good time. Forget about it."

"I-I'm sorry," Chloe now muttered, and Beca turned to her.

"You don't be sorry either, Chlo," the DJ coaxed, taking Chloe's chin and lifting her head. "I understand. I should've said something, and-thank you for just being honest. I was a coward."

"No, you were ambushed. It's okay."

"I told you. I want you around."

Chloe smiled. "I wanna be around."

"Hey, you're the real deal, Little Red!" Frank boomed, causing all to chuckle.

"Thanks, Frank," she replied, her cheeks reddening.

Jesse handed his sister the joint then, and she took a deep inhale. It had not been the night that she had planned on at all, and she knew she had a lot of explaining to do with Stacie, but she was only glad that it had come to an end. When they finished the smoke, she shook the boys' hands before they all took turns hugging Chloe and giving her words of encouragement. Once that had concluded, Beca and Chloe slid into the DJ's car and headed for the redhead's apartment.

"Beca, I know that I got you in trouble," Chloe sighed, eyes downcast on her lap.

"Chlo, don't worry about it, okay?" Beca prodded, grabbing the redhead's hand. "It's okay. I was going to tell her. Not at dinner," She chuckled now. "But I was going to. I wanted her to know that you're gonna be in my life. Her and I aren't together."

"Why not?"

"Why not what?"

"Why aren't you with her? She's been there, right?"

"Look, Chloe, I-I don't want that. I can't. I've tried to make myself love her, but I can't. I just-I can't feel what isn't there. I'm emotionally stunted as it is. I can't force that."

The alcohol was heavy in their systems, Chloe's more so. Stacie had sort of killed Beca's buzz. She still shouldn't have been driving much less talking, but they were there, and neither of them could really handle the tension boiling between them, due not to the words spoken but every word unsaid. It was tearing them apart. By the time that Beca pulled into Chloe's apartment lot, it had become too much. Chloe needed to push her friend in the right direction now whether she wanted to or not because if Beca didn't walk away, Chloe couldn't keep her distance for long.

"I just-" Chloe squeaked. "I don't understand. I know I attacked her-"

"She attacked you first."

"But she doesn't seem so mean. She was just angry that she was caught off guard."

"And I wasn't?"

"I know, but Beca, I want you happy. She really loves you."

"I don't love her that way."

"Maybe you should expand you heart."

Beca was now growing irritated. "I can't do that."

"Well why not?"

"Because I love you!"

Beca's eyes bulged at the confession, and both were frozen in their seats. She could not believe she had just admitted that, aloud, to Chloe. The remainder of her buzz fell away instantly, her mind sobered. The brunette had no idea what to do or what to say now, but her emotions were driving her mad. She at last roared in frustration and pushed the door open, stepping out and slamming it shut. She leaned against the car, hearing the passenger door open and close before the redhead was before her, tears in her deep blue eyes.

"Why?" she croaked.

Beca scoffed. "What the-why is the sky blue? I don't know! You think it's easy loving someone that doesn't love you back? You have the perfect life, and I'm just the pothead DJ that sleeps next to a Victoria's Secret model, and everyone thinks I should jump for joy at that. It's the American dream and all that bullshit, but it isn't my dream. For two years, my dreams have consisted of big blue Disney cartoon eyes and bright red hair. Those dreams became nightmares because _you_ left. _You_ didn't want me. You would rather be with-"

Beca was cut off by Chloe's lips crashing against hers, digits entangling themselves in chocolate locks as she pulled Beca closer. Beca put her hands around the redhead's waist instinctively, clutching the back of her shirt as if her life depended on it. Teeth clashed and tongues battled, and all of the tension was seeping from them, replaced with bliss. This was all Beca had wanted for two years, to feel and touch and kiss and hold the other woman again. She felt the yearning intensify as she tried to use up every ounce of desire she had within. She turned them around, pinning Chloe against the car and attacking her lips with feverish kisses. Chloe suddenly pushed her away but quickly grabbed her hand and led her towards the apartment. They made their way inside and into the elevator where they began kissing again. When the door opened on the fourth floor, Chloe detached and pulled her along. They reached her door, and she reached for her keys. Before she could find them however, the door swung open. There stood a tall man with a bulky build and wavy brown hair. His brown eyes shimmered in the light, and he flashed a toothy white grin.

"Hey, Chlo," he greeted before looking over at Beca as if she were a piece of meat. "Ooh, who's your friend?"

Had Beca not sobered minutes before, she would have attacked the guy.

"Oh, Tom, I-I didn't know you were home," Chloe stammered, shock waring off slowly. "Oh, um, this-this is-"

"Wait a minute," Tom cut her off, eyes lighting up. "You-you're DJ Titanium B, right? Wow, Chlo, you didn't tell me you knew her. You're fuckin' amazing."

Beca cringed as the man shook her hand firmly.

"Uh, yeah, we're friends," Chloe went on.

"Nice. Hey, I just picked up a thirty-pack. Bumper and the guys were gonna come over, but they had to bail. I was just going to check the mail."

"I thought you worked tonight."

"No, I traded shifts with Uni. He had something to do, so I work tomorrow afternoon. Come on. B, come have a drink."

"Uh, no, I should get going," Beca replied. "I-"

"Oh, come on. I never meet any of Chloe's friends. Just a few beers."

Beca was not sure why she allowed the man to pull her into the apartment, but there she was, sitting on their couch and wishing the ground would swallow her up at that precise moment. She watched as Tom followed Chloe into the kitchen, grabbing her ass roughly and kissing her neck.

"Are you already drunk?" the redhead hissed though Beca could hear it.

"Don't worry about it," he returned with a sigh. "I'm cool. What has you looking like a hooker?"

"Excuse me?" Beca's fists were balled, knuckles white as a sheet.

"That's a compliment, princess. I'll be ripping it off of you later."

"Tom, you know I'm-"

"Right, saving yourself for marriage!" he boomed now. "I forget."

Beca nearly snorted at that, but she was more relieved than anything that Chloe had yet to let Tom sleep with her, even if it was a lie. At least there was that, right?

"Can you please stop it?" Chloe shot back.

"What? This is our house. I'll do what I'd like."

"Tom, just-please go to bed."

"Don't tell me what to do."

"Please just-"

"Two beers. Two beers, and I'll go to bed."

Those two beers were spent talking about all of the women Beca had slept with, or rather Tom prodding the subject relentlessly while Beca shrugged, and Tom's high school track record. It was disgusting, and had Chloe not looked so distressed under his arm, Beca would have strangled the idiot right then and there. At last, halfway through his fourth beer, Tom slumped off towards the bedroom, groaning the whole way. Beca had resigned to the terrace for a moment for a smoke. Chloe walked out there with her, and Beca pulled her into a side hug, keeping her grasp firm around the redhead's shoulders. Chloe fought back tears, and Beca put the joint to her lips.

"You don't have to do this anymore," Beca whispered to her with a warm smile. "You can be happy. We can be happy. I can take care of you." Chloe took a long drag of the joint, afraid to answer, so Beca went on. "When are you going to tell him?"

"Tell him what?" Chloe asked slowly.

Beca looked over at her with a confused look. "That we-you-I-I mean, you-" Now she stepped away to fully face the redhead. "Chloe, you-you're not gonna stay with him, are you?"

"I-it-it isn't that simple, Bec-"

"Yes, it is that simple!" She knew her voice was rising, but she didn't care. "I was here all of ten minutes and wanted to rip his fuckin' head off. He treats you like a pet, and you don't deserve that."

"B-but my dad loves him, and-"

"Then tell your dad to marry him and get treated like a fuckin' toy."

"Beca, please stop." Tears flowed from her eyes.

"Chloe, please tell me you aren't that weak!"

"Excuse me!"

"You-you can't be serious! You don't deserve that!"

"And what do I deserve, Beca! To be the wife of the world's most wanted DJ! To sit home waiting for you when you work late? To be on the cover of all the magazines and take second to the fame?"

"H-how can you even say that, Chloe? I've been making time for you. I-I'll hand it all over right now to be with you. I swear it."

"No, you can't do that! Don't pull that guilt trip on me!"

"It's not guilt. It's the truth."

"No, B, that's who you are. You are an artist, the best one, and I'm-I'm a dentist. That's me."

"Oh, because I'm not a fuckin' UCLA doctor, I'm not good enough for you?"

"I never said that-"

"But your parents would, and that would be far more important than what you have to say, right? Because free-spirited, bright and bubbly Chloe Beale is too scared of daddy to be happy and be honest with herself!"

"How dare you! Just-"

"What the hell was that in the parking lot then, Chloe? Had he not been here, we would be in bed right now, right? Yet, he actually believes you're saving yourself for marriage? Did I just dream up our nights together?"

"No, I-it's just-"

"Be honest with me, Chloe! Be honest with yourself! You don't want him!"

"You have no idea what I want!"

"Tell me then, Chloe! Tell me you want me out! Tell me you don't care about me the way I care about you! Tell me-"

"I don't love you, Beca! I walked away once for a reason, and I thought we could be friends because I felt bad, but I do NOT love you!"

Chloe knew it was a lie. Hell, deep down even Beca knew it was a lie, but she was never one to force things, so she obediently accepted it as the truth. Perception is all that mattered in such a situation, and Beca had nothing more to say. Chloe's eyes softened at the hurt and agony now occupying those steel blue eyes, confusion mixed in there as well, something that the redhead had never seen there before. She had no idea how to be honest now however. She could not. Her fate sat with Tom. Her father's pride was all that mattered, and she could not throw it away.

"Beca, I-" she started, trying to at least rescue their friendship, but Beca cut her off.

"No, no," she breathed. "No, that's-"

"Beca, I-I wanna be your friend."

"No, you don't. You don't owe me anything. You don't have to pity me."

"That came out wrong. I-I do wanna be-"

"I-I can't be your friend. I'm sorry, b-but I can't. I-I love you."

With that, Beca kissed Chloe's forehead softly before returning inside. She grabbed her coat and left the apartment with haste. She slid into her car, lighting up another joint as the dam broke and tears rained down her face. Her body was trembling vigorously, and her eyes were blurred, but she didn't care. She just needed to get out. She needed to get away. She sped off down the street towards the loft. She wanted it all to be finished. She needed first to cut Stacie loose. It was the least that she could do. No one deserved to suffer with her. She pulled into the loft, quickly heading inside as she wiped the tears away. Jesse was in the kitchen, but she put a hand up before he could speak and trudged upstairs. Stacie sat on Beca's bed in her room, her cheeks streaked with tears as her body shook with sobs, and all of the thoughts, the plan that she had, whooshed out of Beca's mind. The courageous, determined reserve she had just walked in with fell away, shoulders slumping as she expelled a heavy breath. Stacie looked up then. Their eyes met, and neither moved for a moment. The model's tears ceased instantly as they gazed at one another then she at last stood, closing the distance between them and crashing their lips together. Beca wrapped her arms around the taller woman, allowing Stacie to pull her onto the bed. She shrugged out of her shirt as Stacie pushed down her own dress, their lips never detaching. Stacie removed her bra quickly, kicking off her heels. She then pulled Beca atop her, but when she did, the DJ jumped off. She doubled over, attempting to catch her breath again. Stacie didn't have to ask. She already knew, but she was much too scared to say anything.

"I-I, Stacie," Beca breathed, now looking up to meet watery hazel green eyes. "We can't-I can't do this anymore. It isn't you, and I am terribly sorry. I thought that with time, I could fall for you, that I could love you the way you loved me, but-I-I just can't. It was always Chloe. For two years, it's been Chloe, and I'm paying for the pain I'm putting you through. She doesn't want me, but I can't just settle with you. It's unfair to you."

"What-what if I don't care?" Stacie choked out.

Beca offered a weak smile, striding over and cupping the other brunette's cheek. "Stace, I can't do that to you. I can't live with myself knowing I'm going to keep hurting you. I can't do this right now. I don't want to do to you or anyone else what Chloe's done to me. I didn't walk out on her that weekend two years ago. She ditched me. I-I just can't, and if we don't stop this, we're gonna end up resenting each other. We just can't do this, okay? I'm sorry. You're my best friend, always, if you wanna be, but-we-we can't stay together like this anymore. It isn't what I want or need. I want you to be truly happy with someone that loves you, but-it's not me."

"Becs, please."

Beca kneeled down now. "I can't do this to you, Babygirl. Look, I-I just-"

"M-maybe we can-take a break. Maybe we can just-see what it's like to be without each other."

"I can't give you false hope, Stace. I can't do that to you. I love you, but not in that way."

"J-just please, can we just try?"

"I-I'll-maybe, okay? I can't promise anything. Now, do you need me to drive you home?"

"No, that's okay. I'll be fine."

Stacie placed a soft kiss on the DJ's lips once more before redressing and heading downstairs. Beca sat down on the bed, body numb from the emotional beating it had taken that day. A few moments later, her bedroom door opened once more to reveal the only two people she had never regretted loving, Aubrey and Jesse. Jesse held up a case of beer with a grimace, and she stood up quickly, an unspoken agreement between them.

The siblings sat on the tailgate of Old Blue just below the infamous Hollywood sign overlooking LA. The lights were like an endless blanket over the vast city, and it was a serene atmosphere. Beca had yet to break down fully since leaving Chloe for the last time. She could feel the tears continuously welling up in the back of her eyes, her mind fighting to keep calm. The trio didn't speak the entire drive up to their spot where they had first drank all night and coped in silence over the death of their mother when they returned to the coast, the place they celebrated alone after Jesse's graduation and Beca's big break. They had only sat in the truck silently as Aubrey drove out to the landing. Still, no one had said a word after two beers each already. No one wanted to disrupt the tranquility of the moment. Beca knew they only wanted to keep her calm. She sat between them comfortably, sipping at her beer. There were three more cases in the large ice chest behind them and a bottle of Jack that always made its way into play. Usually it was about five beers in, and Beca anticipated it. She just wanted to escape the heartache if only for awhile.

Afraid of losing her mind due to the silence, Beca chuckled softly into the night. Her siblings cracked a smile, happy to hear something from her, but they did not take a look.

"Remember our first night here?" she asked. "Bree, we coerced you into buying all of those tall cans, and we sat out on the balcony of that hotel before we moved in with KJ."

"Yeah, as in you guys whined for twenty minutes about not being treated like children yet you were pouting like five-year-olds," the blonde scoffed.

"But it worked, right?"

"I'm pretty sure it was Bree's first time getting drunk," Jesse chuckled.

"Shut up," Aubrey scolded playfully. "It was not."

"She's right. It wasn't," Beca smirked. "Remember Sara Reid's grad party? We were freshmen, but Mom made you take us with you."

"Yeah, and Beca banged the older sister!" Jesse recalled, snapping his finger. "She was what, like twenty?"

"Yeah, and it was illegal!" Aubrey snapped.

"Whatever," Beca snorted. "Anyway, back to this. We searched the entire fuckin' estate for you, and where were you? Drunk off your ass in the basement with Sara's tongue down your throat."

Aubrey giggled at that. "Good times."

"Hey, we can never deny that, though it may not seem likely now, that Bree was a mack," Jesse chortled. "She turned Elena Petris her junior year, remember?"

"Yeah, but that poor girl was terrified of Mom," Beca laughed.

"Well, maybe because the first time they met, Mom told her she was gonna staple her private parts shut if she ever hurt Aubrey. Then you had to go give her the 'hurt my sister, and I'll gouge your eyes out with a compass' talk. I would've tripped out too."

"Yeah, and then what happened? Aubrey fuckin' dumps her before prom for Tyra Winters."

"I did not!" Aubrey defended.

"Then what the hell happened?"

"I had already broken up with Elena because she was ashamed of me, but when she saw me at prom with Tyra, she thought it would be cool to cause a scene."

"Well that backfired," Jesse huffed. "Everyone called her names for the rest of the school year."

Beca chuckled bitterly. "Either way, back then, love was too easy, you know."

"It wasn't love, B," Aubrey sighed. "It was us using our deviant charms to break hearts."

"Yeah, Bree, but-I mean, you stopped all that when you went to college, you know. You haven't dated in who knows how long, and-you're always watching over me, and I don't want that. I want you to live. I want you to be happy."

Bree ruffled her hair with a smile. "I am happy, B. I love my job. I love watching you grow. I know I'm doing right, and maybe one day, I'll find the will to date again, but the truth is that it scares the living hell out of me."

Beca snorted. "You're telling me. Meanwhile, our brother found the perfect girl on like his first try."

"First try?" Jesse repeated.

"Dude, be real. You never really dated anyone. Well, okay, there was Jenna, but she was a fuckin' bitch who dragged you along for a year, and she didn't deserve a damn thing from you. Ashley is-she's so cool, and she takes care of you. I mean, the only reason you guys are so-sporadic is because you both have careers and other things you worry about when you shouldn't, but, come on, J. She was there after Mom died. She's been there just like-like Stacie's been there for me, but-I-I can't love her back. You're lucky. You can."

"Yeah, I guess so. You know, B, it's gonna work out for the best. I can assure you."

"Don't start with your movie logic."

"I already told you about that, B. At least you can say 'oh well' and not 'what if', you know?"

"Yeah, I know. It's just-ugh, I don't wanna deal with it."

"Then don't," Aubrey urged. "Not tonight. Let's just enjoy tonight."

"You know, I really do think Mom would be proud of us," Jesse sighed, taking another drink.

"Yeah," Beca scoffed. "I'm sure all of the weed and alcohol and sex really makes her smile."

Both of her siblings elbowed her sides, and she chuckled.

"You know what he means, B," Aubrey chided. "We made something of ourselves. We didn't fall apart when she left, and that's all she asked of us. She wanted us to stay strong and stay together. She wanted us to make it out."

And they had. Beca had made something out of herself as her siblings had, and the DJ wanted more than anything to be content with what she did have instead of dwelling on what she could have had. It hurt. It was painful. It was tearing her to pieces inside, but this was how it would be. She knew that long ago. Never had she believed in happy endings. Never had she given all of those movies with the cliche endings a second glance. How this had all happened was beyond her, but she had lost Chloe long before it had began, and she accepted the fact that it was what she deserved. She had not earned the right to be loved. It was why she felt her mother had been taken from her, why her father had been taken away choosing a job over his family. She sometimes didn't understand how Aubrey could love her, and she figured Jesse wouldn't either if it was not for their deep bond. She would have understood though. Chloe could not love someone like her. She never would, and it was painful, but it was something that had to be faced, delt with, accepted. She only hoped that she could come to terms before it killed her.


	10. The Past Comes Back To Haunt Her

**_A/N: So here we go. Sorry for the late chapter. The response for the last chapter was amazing. Thank you to all who reviewed. I apologize for leaving you hanging. This story is just becoming a lot longer than I intended or expected, so with work and family and everything, It's a bit harder, but Im still here, so thanks for sticking with me._**

* * *

_I love you and we both know its true_

_But you cant be with me and I dont know what to do_

_So many nights I cried tried to flush you out my system_

_Tried to tell you I was sick and tired but you didnt wanna listen_

_You were the worst kinda drug but I denied rehab_

_Theres that little bit of happiness with you and I need that_

_Because of what I been through, I lost belief in trust_

_But through all of the ash, all I wanted was us_

_I love you with all my heart but I got a choice_

_And its only harder every time I hear your voice_

_All I kept thinkin was you were never comin back again_

_But you always came back and I would wish u hadn't then_

_I cant live with you and I cant live without you_

_Your like an antibiotic, another dose, I dont want it_

* * *

The glass that Chloe had been holding went crashing to the ground, shattering across the kitchen's tiled floor. She was unaware however as she clapped a hand to her mouth, eyes intent on the TV across from her in the living room. The words emanating from it were familiar, but the scene unfolding had her breathless. Frank Ocean was the first to appear on the TV sitting on a bed in a dim-lit room, a haze falling around him with a woman's arms draped over his shoulder before he appeared in what seemed to be a recreated scene of Coachella. The lyrics intensified with the visual now, and Chloe waited with bated breath as Frank went through the chorus. When the second verse began, she was in tears, frozen in her place. The brunette DJ looked sullen. Maybe it was due to the song and the drug that had inspired it, or maybe she really looked so ill. She sat on the edge of a stage, surrounded by the same haze as Frank. Women blurred through the screen, but the one constant in each frame was a blur of fiery red and icy blue. Then she appeared. A redhead though she never turned to reveal her face. The ending scene of Beca's chorus was her laying in bed beside the redhead before the other woman left the DJ there alone. Chloe's heart broke, knowing how truthful the image was. She missed Beca. She truly did. It had been a month since she had last seen the DJ in person, and it pained her to no end to know that she had shoved the brunette out of her life. She had no idea how to handle that.

As the video ended, there was a sharp wrapping on her door. She jumped at the sound before scurrying over the glass to answer. She opened it to surprisingly find a guest she had never had before or ever expected to have.

"Jesse?" she gasped.

"Hey, Chloe," he greeted sheepishly with a smile.

"What-how-come in. Come in."

She ushered him into the living room quickly, offering him a seat on the couch. She fetched two beers and sat one in front of him. He took it gratefully, chugging down a large amount within seconds and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Chloe watched him with worried eyes. In his big brown orbs, she saw worry as well mixed with fear and many other different emotions uncanny of him.

"Is she okay?" Chloe at last asked, no longer able to hold it in.

"Huh?" he asked, and he had a dazed expression on his face. "Oh, yeah, I-I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, she-uh, she took off a week ago, after she finished Jay-Z's project. She-she cancelled the Victoria's Secret party she was supposed to DJ, and-well, I guess. Yeah, she just-she left."

"Is-she coming back?"

"I-yeah, soon I think. I hope."

"Jesse, I'm so sorry for all of this, for-"

"Chloe, don't apologize to me. It's not me, you know. That's fine. I don't much get it, but I do know how much she loves you. Either way, well, I-Luke wanted me to invite you to the club opening on Friday."

"I-Jesse, I can't. It's her birthday thing, and-"

"Chloe, we're your friends, you know. We would like you there, and I know she would too."

"Jesse, I can't be what she wants me to be."

"You can't, or you won't?"

"Please don't do that."

"I'm just saying. We all deserve a happy ending. I'm here for her though, Chloe. I feel her pain even though she isn't here. Twins, remember? Yesterday, getting the green light on my first draft of the Man of Steel script, should have been the happiest day of my life, but it wasn't because my sister's pain lives with me, and I want her home. I-" Then he had a look of realization in his eyes, and he sighed heavily. "Look, I don't know what I expected. I understand you can't be with her because of your parents and stuff. I guess I wouldn't know. We don't have parents anymore, you know. I-I'm sorry. I-I just wanted to help her, but-yeah. If you can't come, I understand, but we would appreciate it. It's her first performance in six months, so-yeah. Uh, but here's my number." He handed her a card. "If ever...yeah."

With that, he downed his beer and bid her farewell, Chloe unable to say anything else. He left out of the apartment with a look of defeat etched in his once so lively features.

* * *

Beca shuffled into her bedroom, dropping her suitcases on the floor before taking the pipe from her pocket and sparking it. She felt that the hit was more intense now especially since she had Benji adding extra doses of Novacane to the herb, but still, she could never get high enough. She sat back in her desk chair, inhaling deeply. Her cheeks were sunken in slightly, sallow and dry in the skin. There were dark circles rounding her eyes, and the steel blue had taken a much duller shade. She seemed frail, but maybe it was because she had been going days without eating. The drug helped her forget to or she would just avoid it. After shooting the video with Frank, she had thrown herself into her work, going nights without sleeping and anything else but music and Novacane. She had immersed herself in current projects, but the moment she finished with Jay-Z's album production, the walls had crumbled around her. Everything had come crashing down, and she could no longer handle it. The drug had always been enough. It had never taken her as high as Chloe had taken her, but it held her over. Now it didn't even do that, and the day that Beca realized she could no longer depend on herself was the day she lost herself even if only for a moment.

She had gone to visit her mother for awhile after finishing up her work on Jay-Z's project. While she had worked on it, she had locked herself away in the studio without so much as a snack. Bathroom breaks were even limited, but her stomach remained empty. She smoked, and she worked. That was all. The moment she was done, she was on a plane home, and she had been gone almost two weeks, only returning because of her promise to Luke. It was the opening of Bella's, their new nightclub, and she couldn't miss it if she wanted to hold onto her career. She had even forgotten that it was supposed to be a celebration of a her birthday as well. The music was all she had left though, and she could not throw her career away. First however, she had to pull herself together, and Aubrey was at the house an hour after Beca's flight had landed, giving the brunette enough time to get home.

The door to the room flew open, and the blonde strode in with a bag of food, some water, and a Gatorade. Beca winced.

"Come on," Aubrey huffed, taking in her sister's appearance. "We have less than thirty-two hours to bring you back to life before the club opening."

The next thirty-two hours was filled with meals, snacks, hydration and a long bath. Oh, and lots of weed, but that's a given. Scrubbing down her sister had been a lousy job in Aubrey's mind, but she had done it anyway.

"When was the last time you showered?" she snapped at Beca, who only shrugged. "When was the last time that you ate something? _Substantial_?" Once again, only a shrug. "This has to stop, Beca. You are a professional, and you cannot be throwing tantrums each time this-"

"It's only going to happen once," Beca said coldly. "No one else can do that to me."

"Good."

Two hours before the grand opening, Beca was down at the club, and you never would have guessed that she had fallen apart and looked like death only hours prior. Dressed in creased, black shorts that reached mid-calf, a white tanktop with the Bella "B" crest on the chest, and a plaid navy blue and white shirt, the colors really brought out the blue in her eyes. Her hair fell perfectly around her face, and she had the usual overdose of eyeliner. Still, she looked like cool, calm and collected DJ Titanium B.

The line already wrapped around the building, and she was taken through the back door to get inside where Luke, Cynthia Rose, Aubrey and Lily were getting things ready and speaking to the employees. She took the offered rum and coke from Luke, sipping it generously as she stood against the bar. The large stage across from them was being prepared for the many performances of the night. Frank and Kendrick Lamar would be there as well as Rihanna and Justin Timberlake. The cathedral-like ceilings arching high above them were a sight to see, but the false ceiling would slide across those openings before the performances in order to aide the acoustics in the room. The floors were carpeted, a deep scarlet with navy blue trim along the walls. There were tables and couches in a designated area near the bar. Several skybox VIP rooms lined the upper deck. The DJ booth was smack in the middle. The lighting had been done by a few of Jesse's buddies that did movie light setups for a living, and they were sure it would be grand. Bottom line was that Bellas was the most anticipated opening of the year for anything, and the elite would be there tonight.

"You ready for tonight, Champ?" Luke asked, nudging her shoulder.

"Yeah, I think so," she replied.

"You doing alright though, Mate?" His face went from playful to stern instantly.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I just-needed to breathe, you know, but I'm good."

"Good. Hey, B, you know we're like family, right? We've been making dreams come true together for five years now. We got you."

"I know, Luke." She clapped his shoulder. "Thanks."

"No problem. Just remember, things always fall into place, and when it makes sense, you'll find true happiness."

She scoffed. "Philosopher now, huh?"

"I watch a lot of History Channel and A & E, believe it or not."

She chuckled. "Of course you do."

When Kendrick Lamar walked in with his group that included singer Ab-Soul and rapper Schoolboy Q, they shook Beca's hand, the two artists embracing before Beca called drinks up for them to their reserved skybox flanking the DJ booth to the right. Frank and Rihanna arrived soon after, and Beca showed them to the Def Jam skybox. Although Jay-Z could not make it, they did have the likes of Usher, Ludacris, Keisha Cole and Ciara in tow. Nelly, Pink and a slew of other rappers and singers filled in as well in due time. At nine, the doors were set to open up. After leading the Def Jam artists and Kendrick's crew up to their boxes, she headed into the DJ booth where everything was already set up. She pulled her headphones over her head and onto her neck, and she hoped that the music could rescue her from the thoughts she was drowning in. She had not spun much in the past year what with working in the studio so much with everyone, and she had not been on stage in just as long. She would DJ until midnight for everyone's set before going on with her own. As she scratched a bit before dropping the first record, the waitress came up with another drink. She was surprised to see Stacie coming up behind said waitress, and the tall model smiled at her.

"Hey, DJ," she greeted cheerfully, kissing the brunette's cheek. "How are you?"

"Eh, I'm alright," Beca huffed, offering a shaky smile.

"Hey, you're gonna do great tonight, okay? I brought the whole crew with me, even Thalia. She isn't mad. I told her you needed time, and she understood, but she's here tonight."

"Thanks, Stace."

"Well, I'm still your best friend, am I not?"

For the first time in weeks, Beca flashed a genuine grin. "Yes, you are."

"Okay then. We're in skybox three. See you later."

"Okay, later."

"Save a dance for me, okay?"

Beca smirked. "Don't I always?"

"Just making sure."

Stacie kissed her forehead once more before walking off towards the angel's box. Yes, it had been painfully difficult to act in such a way, but she had to be strong. If she went crazy or acted out, she would only drive Beca away further. She knew she had time. After Chloe, Beca wouldn't be seeing anyone else. They would be just fine when the time was right, but Stacie knew that even as a best friend, she had to protect Beca not only from Chloe and her conniving ways but also from herself.

* * *

Chloe dragged her best friend through the throngs of people to the front of the line. People hollared at them, tossing obscenities and that of the like, but the redhead was much too determined for any of that. She had spent two hours readying herself for the evening, and she had spent three hours prior to that debating on whether to go or not. Her best friend was never one to turn down a party invite, especially not to the hottest event in LA that winter, so she had made the redhead's mind up for her. Chloe smoothed out her little black dress that reached to the middle of her thigh as they reached the grand doors.

"Name?" the bouncer asked over the already pounding bass from within.

"Chloe Beale," Chloe replied curtly.

"Okay, thank you. Come right in."

The bouncer moved aside, removing the chain and allowing them to pass through.

"Jeez, Gingah, you're on the guest list?" her best friend gawked. "What did you do? Sleep with the owner?"

"Nope," Chloe sighed casually, popping the 'p'. "The DJ."

"Wha- Okay, what the hell have you been-ooh, the Coachella concert, right? DJ Titanium B got hooked on your lady bits, did she?"  
Chloe stopped and turned to look at the large blonde with pleading eyes. "Amy, please do not say things like that around her. She-she's-"

"Mad at you because you've decided to stay with douchebag Tom?"

Chloe quirked an eyebrow. "How did you-"

"I was the best psychic in Tasmania, with teeth." Chloe flashed an unimpressed look. "Okay, or the night that her and Tom met, you called me drunk off your ass."

"Oh my gosh. I did?"

"Yeah, and I always wondered if you called her too." Chloe's eyes bulged, and Amy chuckled before slapping her shoulder. "Naw, I'm kidding you, Red. We were on the phone for like twelve hours. I wouldn't let you hang up for fear of you doing just that, and you kept calling me names, but you know, I kept it tight, and eventually you were snoring into my ear like a baby crocodile."

"I was not!"

"You was so! But I knew you would say that, so I have it recorded."

Chloe giggled now, swatting her arm playfully. "Aside from that, you are a good friend. The best. Thanks, Amy."

"No problem, but you owe-"

"Chloe!" another voice boomed from behind them as they stood near a booth, and Chloe turned to see none other than Frank Ocean. "Hey, Chloe!"

Amy's eyes bulged as well as Chloe's as the man embraced her.

"Hey, Frank," the redhead greeted when the shock subsided.

"Hey, how are you doing?"

"I'm-okay." Amy gave a not so concealed cough. "Oh, uh, Frank, this is my best friend, Amy."

"_Fat _Amy," Amy corrected as she took his offered hand.

"You-uh, call yourself, Fat Amy?" he asked cautiously.

"Yep, so twig bitches like Red here don't do it behind my back."

He held a confused expression for all of four more seconds before doubling over in a fit of laughter. "Oh my, that's-wow. Clever."

"It's her job," Chloe assured him. "She writes humorous dialogue for plays and stuff. She just moved to LA from San Diego actually."

"Nice," Frank replied. "Well, hey, why don't you come up to our Def Jam skybox? You can meet the rest of the crew."

"The rest-of the crew?"

"Yeah, uh, Rihanna, Usher, Ciara, Nelly and-"

"Lead the way!" Amy prompted.

Frank had the bartender bring over drinks for the women the moment they were on the second tier, and then he introduced Amy and Chloe to all of the artists on the floor. Rihanna smiled when she saw Chloe, kissing her cheeks and hugging her.

"So this is the one, huh?" she asked Frank.

"Yeah, this is 'Berkeley the dentist'," Frank chuckled.

"She's a good muse then. That song was fire."

"Wasn't it though? Seven million singles sold. That's the most we've ever had. You're a jewel, Chloe. You made it happen. Have you seen Beca yet?"

"Uh, no, I-uh-"

She could not formulate a significant response, and Frank could see the inner turmoil. Once Rihanna settled back down with a fresh drink, he had Amy sit down with Nelly and Usher, which the Aussie didn't mind at all. He then pulled Chloe out of the box through the door at the back of the room where a balcony had been structured in order to cut down on the smoke within. He turned to her once they reached the railing and gave her a stern look. She could not meet his gaze and settled for staring at her shoes.

"What's going on, Little Red?" he asked.

"I-well-I-"

"Come on. You can talk to me. I mean, I know we don't really know each other, but I know that you mean a lot to B. I knew long before the song. While we worked on my album last year, she always looked-different from the Coachella concert. The sparkle in her eye was gone. The song confirmed my theory though because when we recorded it, that sparkle was there again. She was-full of life. I mean, yeah, she had finally come back a little after that concert, but she made a full recovery when she found you again. Even with her mouth all stitched up, she was killing it on the track that day. Tonight though, that sparkle isn't there again. Why?"

"I-I don't know. This is hard for me."

Chloe turned in frustration and leaned on the railing, sipping her drink. Frank pulled out a joint, one that B had given him, and he lit it. After taking a few puffs, he handed it to her.

"Okay, I'll share first," he huffed, looking out over the city below. "Well, I-I haven't told anyone yet, but I plan to soon. The only one I've told is B, but it's only because she guessed it first. She said she knew because-" He chuckled now. "Because I don't like frosting on my pop-tarts."  
Chloe snorted a laugh. "What does that mean?"

"Well, I don't really know what the hell that means, but what she guessed was-I'm-bisexual."

Chloe's eyes widened as she slowly looked over at him. "What? Really?"

"Yeah." He hung his head, but she only smirked now.

"It's always the most handsome ones, isn't it?"

He chuckled then, patting her shoulder. "That's your opinion."

"Frank, people cannot deny you because of who you are. You are an amazing artist, and a more amazing person. You're-famous. You have all of your friends in there, and you're out here with me, trusting me with this when you barely know me."

"Yeah, but-B's my best friend. We spend a lot of time together, and she gets me. She knows the real me, and we can talk about any and everything with each other and not worry about it. I know it's hard to accept things. Trust me, but-well, Chloe. My dad was not happy at all when I first told him I was bi. He stopped talking to me, and he almost took that silent treatment to the grave. He regretted it more than I did though. I know it. Then, when he got sick, he called me, and we talked for hours. I went home to visit him, and he told me he loved me, apologized for losing all of that time. You know what happened? The doctors had given him four months to live. He's still alive two years later."

"Really?"

"Yeah, his cancer went into remission. They removed the last tumor, and he's been good since. My mother said that his repentance and acceptance of me saved his life. Now we talk all the time. They live in Pasadena. She hated me for so long too, you know, but after awhile, maybe a few months, she accepted it because 'I'm her baby, and she loves me'." They shared a laugh. "What I'm saying is, our parents aren't always going to understand our choices, Chloe. They're not always going to accept it straight away, but they're going to love us anyway because we're their children. They're going to come around and understand, but if you allow them to run your life, when theirs ends, you're the one that has to live with the misery. You're the one that has sacrifice your happiness when they never had to."

"But-how did you know-"

"Like I said, B and I are best friends, and she isn't stupid, Little Red. She knew that you said what you said to her because you felt obligated to push her away, but you're here for a reason, and don't tell me it's only because Jesse asked."  
She chuckled. "You know everything."

"I'm a good listener, so if you need to talk, talk to me."

"Thanks, Frank. I just-I do love her, but I don't know how to let my father down. I mean, I became a dentist for them, I went out with Tom, and I went to Berkeley because my mother wanted me to. I know it isn't right, but I can't face them this way."

"Red, you have to figure it out because in the end, you're only going to live with regret and end up resenting them. They'll understand. It's in a mother's heart and a father's strength to, eventually. Plus, you're much cuter than me, so I'm sure you can sway them."

They shared another laugh before Chloe embraced the man. They finished their smoke then headed back inside. Chloe knew that Frank was right, but saying so and doing so are two completely different things, and she had no idea how to do so.

* * *

As the artists took their turns on stage, Beca was up in the booth bobbing her head and enjoying the atmosphere. The crowd below was moving all over the place, enjoying her mashups and anything she threw on. When the performances began, the euphoria was enthralling. Beca handed the decks over to the house DJ a bit earlier than planned to get a drink and check in with her family and friends. When she entered the skybox where Jesse, Aubrey, Luke and the others were stationed, they raised a glass to her. The waitress quickly handed her a drink, and she sipped it coolly. Luke bumped her fist.

"This is crazy!" she hollared over the music.

"Isn't it?" Luke replied. "They're all bloody mad down there! I'm scared we're gonna run out of liquor with all of the bottles they're sending up."

"I think we'll be good."

"Okay, Rihanna's on next, and then it's all you."

"Nice."

"You gonna perform the song?"

"You know it. It's the hit, right?"

"Seven times platinum."

"Seven times platinum."

They clinked their glasses together in honor of the milestone and took large drinks. When Rihanna's set began to close out, Beca made her way to the stage. She was unaware of Chloe watching from the skybox above where Frank was currently getting ready to leave from. He would of course be on stage with her for the "Novacane" performance, and he was giddy with excitement. Chloe was as well, but she concealed it much better than he did. He patted her shoulder before exiting the room.

When Beca began her set, she had Rihanna were on stage as they performed their track from Beca's album. The crowd was chanting the lyrics and jumping around, infused by the dubstep-type beat. When that faded out, Beca came in with her track that featured Cynthia Rose on the hook. The CEO appeared on stage slyly, and the crowd went wild. Her raspy, soulful voice was soothing in every way. When that song went out, the crowd was chanting for Beca to freestyle. It had been a tradition on her rap shows since the start, so the house DJ threw on an instrumental, and she went at it nonstop with lyrics for two minutes. That had the crowd completely amped up, so when the Novacane music began, everyone was up and on the floor ready to belt out the lyrics. Beca kneeled down at the foot of the stage as a dark figure approached from behind her. When the light show began, Frank was illuminated by an icy blue film, smoke clouding at his feet. Screaming echoed through the place. He went through the first verse and chorus, Beca still kneeling at the front of the stage shaking hands and even signing a few autographs here and there. When her verse came up, Frank reached down and jerked her up by the back of her shirt. She had a dazed look on her face as the fog machine kicked in, and she ran her hand down from her forehead to her chin, imitating the effect of the aforementioned high. She went through her verse smoothly, and as she did, she never meant to look up, but somehow her eyes were magnetically pulled towards the skybox. There she met crystal blue eyes, bright even in the dim lights around them. Fiery red locks framed the orbs, and Beca began trailing off on the verse. Frank saw what was happening and came into the chorus with her. When she heard his voice, she snapped out of it, her voice once again strengthening. As they closed out the song, Beca jumped into the crowd, and every girl around nearly fainted. She surfed the audience as the sound faded, and they pushed her back onto the stage. She thanked them before looking up again, but those blue eyes were absent. She knew it had only been a dream. She needed air now. She handed over the microphone and headed up to the second tier once more into their VIP area. As she reached the back of the skybox closest to the DJ booth's left side, now occupied by her closest circle like Luke and CR, a hand gripped her forearm. There were those deep blue pools surrounded by vivid red tresses. She wanted to smile but reverted to a stoic expression. The others in the room had begun to talk quieter, but she knew they were awaiting the confrontation.

"B," Chloe breathed. "You were-amazing. The song-it was amazing."

"Thanks," Beca replied before turning away once more.

"Can-we talk?"

"I-not tonight, Chloe. Really, not tonight. I'm trying to-"

"Forget me?"

Beca growled in frustration as she pushed through the exit and onto the terrace, lighting a joint as she went and leaned against the rail.

"B, talk to me," Chloe croaked with pleading eyes.

"What do you want me to say!" Beca barked back. "You made a choice. That's what it is. Let it go. I'm s-no, I'm not sorry, but I can't be your friend. I'm sorry I ever pursued this."

"Beca, no. I-"

"Ugh, Chloe just leave me the fuck alone!"

Chloe made to grab her arm, but she jerked away and headed back inside. Chloe trailed her with quick paces. They made their way down the stairs and out the back entrance.

"Beca, please just listen-" Chloe tried once more, but Beca again cut her off.

"Chloe, just go home," she roared, not turning around. "I don't know why-"

Before she could finish her thought, she froze, the color draining from her face in an instant. Chloe stopped too as Beca's eyes bulged, blood running cold as she came face to face with a man in the alley. He was a man of small build and medium height with a thick brown goatee and deep steel blue eyes that matched Beca's. When he looked up to see the DJ, he smirked, a smirk that Chloe recognized all too well. His wavy brown hair was identical to Jesse's, cropped short but still showing signs of the waves. Beca's breath caught in her throat. Then the man spoke in a sickly sweet tone.

"Hey, Becs."


	11. Pick Your Poison and Water the Flowers

_You can't escape the past, But am I stupid not to ask_

_Car parked in the drive, it hits you way too fast_

_This can never last, and he returns with such a vengeance_

_He missed every Christmas, you didn't miss him for his presence_

_Life lessons, He swore that you'd regret it_

_Basically you're fed up, brother calling the medics_

_Back and forth, no tennis, fell in love with a dentist_

_Pushed her against the wall, alcohol's become a menace_

_She got a man at home, you have a fan at home_

_No ring around her finger, Just leave the band alone_

_I'm calling it quits, she's calling a cab_

_Locking myself away once again inside this lab_

* * *

"What are you doing here, Warren?" Beca asked in an agitated tone when her shock resided.

"Ooh, who's this?" the man asked, now eying Chloe with a devilish grin and completely ignoring his daughter's inquiry. "You have great taste, just like your old man, right?"

Beca instinctively stepped in front of the redhead to block his view of her, and Chloe stepped closer to the DJ immediately, unsure of what to do. She pulled her phone out quickly behind the coverage of the DJ, thinking of only one thing to do. She texted Jesse. She could feel Beca's muscles tensing against her, her body beginning to shake vigorously with rage. It was no mystery that the man before them wanted nothing more than to get under Beca's skin, to drive her to make a fool of herself in hopes that someone with a camera was lurking in the shadows to catch the celebrity in such a compromising position. In actuality, the alley was deserted save for the three of them, and that scared Chloe the most. She needed Jesse to hurry before someone was severely injured, and the redhead was betting on it being this smug man across from the DJ now if Beca's defensive posture was anything to go by. Chloe had never witnessed her rage, but something told her it was not something she would ever want to see directed at anyone, not even at Warren Mitchell.

"I asked you a fuckin' question," she growled, her eyes donning a menacing glaze.

"Oh, me? Well, I just came to see my little girl do-" he began, but she cut him off.

"_Dont_-go there, Warren. Get the fuck out of here. I am _not_ playing with you."

He raised his hands in mock surrender. "Look, I understand you're mad at me, Becs, but-"

"Don't call me that! You have no right to call me that! Leave!"

His tone became firm now, hands dropping. "Beca, I know you're angry, but I'm still your father."

"I don't have a father. My father died along with my mother. Don't forget that."

He snorted now, and Beca's fists clenched. "I'm here because I need to be. You owe me-"

She scoffed, effectively stopping him once more. "Are you serious? I don't owe you shit. You're pathetic."

Beca turned,grabbing Chloe's hips to change her direction as well and walk back inside, but before she could take more than three steps towards the door, the man grabbed her arm roughly. It was a wrong move surely. Chloe felt herself jerked to a stop, and she looked back. On instinct, Beca turned and smashed her fist into the man's face without restraint. He stumbled back, hand now pinching his bleeding nose. She was fuming now as he gained his footing and donned his smirk once more. He then lunged at her, taking her to the ground, Chloe stepping aside with a gasp just as Jesse and Aubrey appeared outside with Luke and Lily. The two men immediately pulled Warren off of the DJ. She was up in a flash, and she drove a booming kick into his groin. He yelped in pain.

"Lily," Aubrey breathed. "Call security back here."

Warren looked up now at the blonde with a weak chuckle. "Jeez, Aubrey, that stick's still as far up your ass as-"

Now it was Jesse's fist that clashed into his jaw, a cracking sound resonating through the alley. His son tore him from Luke's grasp and pushed him up against the wall, Beca now beside him.

"You ever talk to her like that again, I'll kill you," the twins synchronized without even being fully aware.

Their eyes flashed with rage and hatred. It was uncharacteristic of Jesse, and that look alone scared the hell out of anyone able to see it. Aubrey stepped in front of Chloe now, a protective hand thrown out as Lily called out to security on her radio. It took only a few minutes, though it felt longer to those in the alley, before several guards exited the club. They grabbed Warren, and as soon as the twins had released him, he grew some balls once more.

"I know what you two little fucks did!" he sneered as they pulled him away. "I'm coming back for my money. You owe me, Beca, and you're gonna pay up one way or another!"

Jesse tensed only a moment, hiding any reaction from the comment, before he put a hand on his sister's shoulder as she leaned against the wall taking in a breath. Aubrey quickly stood before them, but neither let on any type of emotion aside from anger. She observed them for a few moments, but they refused to look up and meet her gaze. However, when they stuck closely to each other in such a way, Beca not attempting to shrug off her brother regardless of her anger and instead leaning into him, it usually meant that there was something the two of them were not telling her. It was a tell that Aubrey had learned long ago from when they were toddlers It would occur when they were stealing Santa's cookies or when they didn't do their homework or even when they pulled the senior prank that wasn't really a prank but more of a felony when they keyed Jenna's car and slashed a tire or two. They would hold hands or clap each other's shoulders or make contact some other way. It was their take on sticking together, both figuratively and literally, when they were set to be reprimanded. When Aubrey confirmed that they would not be willingly disclosing any information, she dug for it.

"What is he talking about?" the blonde inquired cautiously.

Jesse looked up now, eyes flickering from his oldest sister to the mouth of the alley before looking away. Silence fell once more as he settled for an noncommittal shrug. Aubrey growled in irritation, taking another step towards the twins. Chloe waited behind the scene with bated breath, just as curious as Luke, who now stood beside her, about what the hell had just taken place. Someone needed to offer some answers. Aubrey made another attempt to pry them from her siblings.

"I asked you what-"

"I don't know, Bree!" Beca suddenly snapped. "He's a fuckin' crook. He wants money. Who knows? Jesus Christ. Why are you giving _me_ the third degree? Go ask him."

"Beca, he didn't sound like he was bullshitting."

"He didn't have shit to say when he was face to face with us," Jesse now defended his twin in a raised tone that made Aubrey's eyes bulge, though the man was oblivious through his own distress. "He's obviously making shit up to scare us. That's what he does, the fuckin' bastard."

Aubrey's eyes searched his for a moment before they desisted from expectation and settled back on her sister because she knew Jesse would not disclose anything without the DJ's consent, making Beca the only liable source at that point.

"Beca," she snarled, and the brunette's eyes suddenly shot up, the same dangerous glint remaining in them that caused Aubrey to slightly retract.

"I don't-fucking-KNOW! I...fuck!"

Throwing up her hands, Beca stalked off now, getting into her car with haste. No one moved until the blonde older sibling expelled a shaky breath, attempting to regain her composure. She then followed Luke back inside with Lily in tow to talk to security and get ready for closing time. She also needed to inform the artists present of Beca's urgent and impromptu departure and possibly reschedule the DJ's birthday dinner that was to be held Sunday evening. Jesse turned to Chloe now, sorrow and apology in his eyes.

"Chloe, you need to get out of here," he breathed. "As quickly as possible. I'll walk you to your car. Let's go."

"Wait, I need to get Amy," she replied quickly as her mind snapped back to reality.

"Okay, come on."

After fetching Amy, who had been telling Tasmanian anecdotes to a very amused Nelly and Justin Timberlake, with a bit of resistance from the drunken Aussie, Jesse walked the two girls out to Chloe's car. Once they helped Amy into the passenger seat, where she was close to passing out from her immense alcohol intake, Chloe faced Jesse with a stern look. He knew what was coming, but he held tight to his reserve. He could not tell anyone especially the redhead what she wanted to know, so he braced himself for the interrogation, thinking up his reply before the line of questioning began. When Chloe had composed herself and actually asked the question, he was ready though he knew she would try and fight him.

"Jesse, what's going on?" she asked.

"Nothing, Chloe, it's-"

"You're acting like I'm in danger. I deserve to know. What was your dad talking about?"

"Chloe, I can't. Just understand you're better off staying away. We'll be fine, but the less you know, the better. Actually, I'm kind of glad this happened now rather than later. I'm sorry, you know. I wanted my sister happy, but I think your dad may be right. It's best for you to be with someone else. Beca would agree. I-I'm sorry for all of this. I better go though. I have to get Ashley. I'm staying at her place tonight."

"What about Beca?"

"She'll probably want to be alone after that, and besides, she can take care of herself. I'll text her once I get out of here and check on her in the morning. Take care, Chloe. Get home."

He gave her one last warm smile and walked away. Chloe watched him disappear into the club, mind racing. She had no idea what had just happened, but at least Jesse had made her feel better about the situation with Beca. She could be with Tom now and not feel guilty. Now she had a legitimate reason, and everything would work out for all involved.

Beca beat into the heavy bag hanging before her mercilessly. She was growling and roaring in rage as her fists slammed repeatedly into the suspended leather, her sounds echoing through the basement. When the anger at last simmered down significantly, she dropped her arms, sweat dripping down her face and stomach. She was clad only in her sports bra and ball shorts. After removing the tape from her hands, she grabbed her towel and wiped her face before heading upstairs for a shower. The knuckles of her left hand were bruised from hitting her father, but the adrenaline had initially numbed out any pain. It throbbed slightly now, but she didn't give it a second thought. She was attempt to soothe the pain with a joint after washing up.

It was nearing four in the morning, but seeing her father had her blood boiling. She knew the man wasn't going to give up trying to corner her. She knew exactly what he had been talking about as he was dragged away. The funny part was that he really believed she owed him. If anything, he owed them for how he had left them to fend for themselves and their mother alone. She had only collected the debt that his children were entitled to after his failure as a father. They were even where she was concerned. Of course, she understood that his greed would not allow him to concur. However, she really didn't give a fuck about his opinion or conclusions on the matter. She was willing to battle him nonetheless because there was no way she would let the man win, no matter the cost. He had taken too much from her, and it ended now.

As Beca entered the kitchen, there was a soft knock on the door. She froze, unsure of who would be there so late or early in the morning. Jesse, Stacie and Aubrey never knocked. They had keys. Maybe Stacie had forgotten hers. Still, she took a knife from one of the drawers before stepping into the foyer. She opened up the door cautiously, knife against the wall beside the opening to be hidden, but she dropped her arm when she saw who it was. Her body grew livid regardless, but after a moment, without a word, she moved aside to allow passage. She didn't know why, but she did, and her stomach was doing flips already. She dropped the knife on the side drawer beside the door before closing and locking it. Then she turned to face her guest, who looked frightened and frazzled before her.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, harsher than intended, but she didn't care.

"I-I wanted to talk to you," the visitor replied shyly, eyes downcast, shifting nervously from one foot to the other as the air in the room seemed to thicken. "I _need _to talk to you."

"Chloe, I don't wanna do this, okay? I told you I don't wanna be your friend-"

"I know, Beca, but can you please just listen-"

"I don't wanna listen, okay?! I already listened to enough. There is nothing to be said here. You made your decision, and there's nothing you have to explain or justify to me. Just stop! It's killing me enough as it is. Don't you see what you're doing to me? It's so fuckin' pathetic, and I hate myself for allowing you to break me down the way you do, but somehow, I'll survive. I'm doing what you asked. I'm being understanding as much as I can. You get your happy ending, or your parents do or whatever. I don't care, but you can't have me and have him. I'm done. Just-"

"Beca, please!"

"No! You don't get to beg now! I'm done with-"

And once again Chloe beneficially cut Beca off by smothering the DJ's lips with her own, a bruising kiss that of course caught Beca off guard to the point where she could not originally react. Chloe needed this. She needed to do this. She needed the woman to listen, to feel what she felt, to know that Chloe loved her with every fiber of her being despite anything she had ever said or done, and she never wanted to lose her again. She would find a way to keep her.

After taking Amy home and getting her safely up to bed, the redhead had sat in the parking lot of her best friend's complex for over an hour going over the night in her mind then replaying every moment her and Beca has spent together. She could not shake off the feelings in her heart any longer. Beca was the one. She may not be the perfect choice to anyone else, but to Chloe, she was the _only_ choice. She felt alive when she was with Beca, every moment spent on the beach or at the brunette's home when Stacie was absent or in some diner or at Denise's restaurant. It was in the small touches, the gentle caresses, the genuine compliments, and so much more than she didn't get anywhere else apart from with the brunette. She felt like herself. She wasn't some puppet reading from a script. She was a human being with real emotions and a mind of her own. She wanted that, no matter the cost. It would take some time to admit it and explain it to her family, to her father namely, but she could not live another day without Beca. She could not settle for being Tom's trophy. There was no way. She just needed the DJ to give her time, nothing more, nothing less. Regardless of the danger it posed, she needed to be with the DJ until the true end came because she refused to live with a life of regret. Frank had been right. Beca had been right. They had all been right, and now, it was up to Chloe to make it right before it was too late. When Beca regained focus however, she shoved the redhead away quickly.

"No, Chloe, stop!" she roared, breathing hard.

The redhead was shaken by the outburst, Beca's eyes illuminating with regret and hatred as her body became rigid. That anger had returned, and it terrified Chloe. Before she could make another move however, the DJ's reserve broke, her eyes losing the malicious coating and welling up with tears as she slumped against the door. When she spoke next, her voice was cracked and frail, an aura of defeat and exhaustion overtaking her.

"Please, stop playing with me. I-I can't do this again. Please, Chloe, just stop this. Please."

Chloe took a bold step forward, reaching up and cupping Beca's face firmly, tears in her own eyes. Beca could not move away nor could she say a word. Her body would not respond to any command her mind was delivering as she leaned heavily on the door for support, all energy lost. She didn't care that she was half naked and probably looked more vulnerable than she ever had. She _couldn't _care. She was much too emotionally wasted to care about anything. She could no longer fight. She was drained, and she wanted it all to go away, but the look in Chloe's eyes, had she paid attention, would inform her that the feeling was mutual. Chloe no longer wished to battle either. She wanted to end the suffering for the both of them.

"Beca, please, just-listen," Chloe breathed, barely above a whisper. "I-I love you, okay, but-"

"No," Beca choked out, tears now falling rapidly and crashing around her as her heart ached. "No, don't do that. Please. Don't say that to me. You can't-"

"Baby, I just need some time. I need you, but I-"

"I-I'm not going to be your-dirty little secret, Chloe. I can't. I'm not-"

"Beca, just give me time. I'm begging you. You have to understand. This is a big leap for me. The risk is so big, and I'm so scared because my parents always made the decisions for me, and I let them. They orchestrated my entire life. I've never made decisions for myself, but-I-I can't lose you. I thought that I could handle it like I always handled it, but I can't. You really love me. I see that. Tom doesn't love me. He needs me to complete this-this image he has to uphold, but I don't want that. I love you and only you. I need to be with you, and if that means taking the leap, then I will, but I just need time."

"You-you don't want this, Chloe. It-I'm in too deep, and I-"

"I know. I know there's-trouble. I don't know what it is exactly, but-I can't care, Becs. I can't because I fell for you, and I was so scared of doing that, but I couldn't stop it. I tried to talk myself out of it, to lie to myself and lie to you. I gave myself a million reasons why it could never work, but no matter how many reasons I give myself, they never drown out the one reason I have for trying. I'm-in love you, Beca."

"Don't-don't play these games with me. You say it now, but then you'll go back to him and your father and change your mind over and over again, and I can't deal with that. I'm not that strong no matter what I've led anyone to believe. Emotions are so far beyond me. They always have been. My only weakness, and I-I can't do this. I-you-I can't be second to him. I-"

"You're not second to anyone. I'm just asking for time. I'm here. I'm yours."

"We-can't hide it, Chloe. My entire life is watched, surveyed. My father's going to make everything so much-worse, and I can't put you in that. I-"

"You told me to start thinking about what I want. This is what I want. We can figure out all of the other stuff, but I want you. I need you."

"Don't-"

Chloe carefully leaned in, a slow pace. Beca's eyes fluttered closed, unable to hold off her desires, then their lips made impact. It wasn't like the other kisses, filled with lust and desire. It was a sweet and passionate kiss that warmed the soul and took the breath away. Beca could no longer fight although she felt it deep in her core that she would regret it later. For now, she just played it out as if it were a dream, as if it was a fantasy being created in her own mind where nothing could hurt her. She reached down, gripping the back of Chloe's thighs and hoisting her up. The redhead gasped at the sudden move but kept her lips on Beca's as they made their way upstairs. Beca walked into the bathroom and reached over to turn on the water in the shower. She then set Chloe down, gently pulling the straps of her dress down her shoulders before peeling the garment off of her. Bras fell away, Beca's shorts were discarded, and underwear ended up upon the ground. Chloe gently pulled the DJ beneath the warm spray, pulling the glass door closed as they resumed their kisses against the heated tile. Beca trailed kisses down her neck slowly, Chloe's fingers lost in chocolate locks. Her breathing became labored as the DJ worked, the water falling down on them and relaxing their muscles. Beca's fingers lightly grazed Chloe's center, eliciting a whimper before the brunette reattached their lips. She only wanted to savor this moment for as long as possible. Chloe was there, and it was all that she had ever wanted, but she was afraid that making love or having sex would end it where it stood. Chloe washed her then, not urging her to go further. When they finished, they dried off and went to Beca's room. She pulled the redhead beneath the sheets, holding her as close as possible as her lips trailed down her neck and bare shoulder.

"Don't let go," Chloe pleaded in a hushed tone. "No matter what, don't let go. I'll always find my way back to you."

"Don't push me away," Beca returned, a whisper against Chloe's neck that sent shivers down her spine. "Don't make me go."

"I won't."

Stacie had been worried about the DJ all night. She had not seen Beca since she had gone on stage, and she had taken off without a word, leaving off of the stage in a rush. Stacie had even asked Frank about her, but the man only said that Aubrey told him she had gone home early for some unknown reason. She only wanted to know her beloved was okay. No matter what happened between them, Stacie could never shake her feelings or compassion towards the woman, and she always worried for her. She just needed to know that Beca was fine.

The model trumped up to the door of Beca's house, unlocking it with her key. The first sound she heard was humming coming from the kitchen. She expected to find Ashley making breakfast, but as she entered the room, her body became taut with anger. There stood a glowing redhead in only her underwear and Beca's tanktop, which rode up significantly to leave her midriff visible, making coffee and what looked to be eggs and bacon. Chloe turned around to retrieve the plates on the island behind her, and her eyes met hazel green.

"What-are you doing here?" Stacie growled.

"I-stayed with Beca last night," Chloe replied simply, returning to her task.

"Oh, so you fuck her, make her breakfast, then go back to your boyfriend? Is that it?"  
Chloe quickly turned once more and leveled her with an icy glare, one not usually seen on the bubbly woman. "No, that's not it. You don't know-"

"You are not going to hurt her, you hear me? I won't let you. You need to leave her the hell alone. You've done enough damage, don't you think?"

"Look, I'm not going to hurt her. I wanna be with Beca. I-"

"You have no idea what you want. You're just a clueless little girl."

Chloe scoffed. "Oh, and you do? You were her fuck buddy for years, and you think that all of sudden, you'll be more than that? She loves me, and you know that."

"Regardless of that, you're no good for her. You tore her apart on more than one occasion, and it was us who had to pick up the pieces!"

"I know what I did, Stacie, but I'm going to make it right. I-"

"What's going on?" a groggy voice now came from the stairs.

The two women looked up to see the woman in question rubbing her eyes. She then looked up and met Stacie's gaze. The model's eyes immediately softened.

"Stacie?" she said softly. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to check on you," the brunette now replied, tone much calmer. "You just ran off last night, and I was worried about you."

"Yeah, I-well, something happened. It's okay though."

"What happened, Becs?"

"Look, can we talk about this later? I'll call you."

It was Stacie's turn to scoff. "Are you serious, Beca? You're really just gonna shake me off because this-bitch is here?"

"Hey!"

"No, who was the one that has been here for you, Beca?"

"Stacie, we talked about-"

"Who stood by you when she tore you to pieces? Who picked up those pieces and tried to put them back together?"

"But, Stacie, I told you. You couldn't. I'm sorry, but-"

"No, Beca. She's only gonna do it again! What? Are you just gonna be her side chick while she's over there in bed with that doctor?"

"It's not like that-"

"Listen to you! She's just going to play you out until she's had her fun because you're her escape from her perfect life. She wants to feel like a free bird smoking weed and hanging with celebrities and going to hippie concerts, and you're gonna-"

"Stacie, stop! Dammit, we talked about this, and I told you-"

"Beca, look at what you're doing to yourself, what she's doing to you, and what you're doing to us! Who has to handle the chaos after? We do! When she runs away again, we have to deal with that pain, and I'm not-"

"Dammit, Stacie! You and I are not together! We never will be! I don't love you like that!"

"The same way she doesn't love you like that, Beca." Stacie's eyes were pouring tears now.

"You don't know-"

"Oh, but I do, baby, because I'm watching it unfold. Lock it up, Mitchell, before you become the punchline to her sick joke she's whipping up, and you can treat me like this now, but you know that I'll never leave you. I'll always be there to clean up the mess because _I _love you."

Stacie turned on her heel then and walked out of the house, and Beca growled in agitation before racing after her. She caught up to the model in the driveway and grabbed her arm.

"Stacie, please listen to me," she begged, their eyes meeting. "I love you."

"I love you too, but the way you deserve to be loved, Beca," Stacie returned. "I've been there hoping and praying you would see that all you need is right in front of you. I changed. I stopped sleeping around. I was loyal to you and only you. I've never run out on you. When you needed me, I was there. I stopped leaving right after we had sex the moment that it became necessary. I stayed because I love you."

"I know, and I'm so sorry. Stacie, I've tried so hard to love you back, but-I just can't. I can't apologize enough, but I want you to be my friend. My-best friend."

"Beca, just think this. You know how you couldn't be Chloe's best friend? I can't be yours especially to watch you tear yourself down the way you couldn't watch her do it. I-I can't. The only difference between you and I and you and Chloe is that you at least care enough not to drag me along anymore because that's what she's going to do. She's going to make promises over and over, and she's going to break those promises over and over until it kills you, and-I can't stand around to watch. I am so in love with you, Beca, but I can't do this."

Beca dropped her head. "I-I understand then. That's all I can really do. You may be right, but I'm in love with her, Stacie, and you would understand that if you love me the way you say you do. You have to please understand. I never wanted to hurt you. I wanted to see you happy, and-well, I hope I can one day, but-not with me. My place is with Chloe, and if it kills me, well. That's the cost of it. I can take that."

"You're settling."

She reached up and swiped a tear from Stacie's cheek. "We both were, but I believe in this, and I have to take that risk. You wanted to take that risk. The difference is that I'm in love with someone else. Chloe isn't in love with someone else. She's only scared to admit it."

"You don't have to do this."

"But I want to."

Beca stood up on her tip-toes and kissed Stacie's cheek. Stacie handed her the key to the house before turning and sliding into her car. Beca watched as she pulled out of the drive and headed down the road, a small pang of guilt in the DJ's gut. When the car was out of sight, she turned and went back into the house. Chloe had already set out breakfast. She stepped towards the brunette, taking the DJ's face in her hands gently. Beca offered a weak smile.

"I'm not going to let you down," Chloe assured her.

"Whether you are or not, I couldn't leave," Beca returned bitterly. "Even if I should. Even if I wanted to."


	12. It Just Got Real

**_A/N: Yeah, so the plot takes a bit of a twist here because I honestly didn't expect to make it as big of an issue as it was, but my trusty comrades here assured me that it would be cool to have a take on the issue that I've hinted at throughout the story with Beca and Jesse selling drugs. You can thank my twins as well for being so calm and behaved while Im writing. That's the only reason why I can write and work all at once lol. So here we go. Oh and another verse by me just so you know. the verses in this story are still unrecorded and written solely for this so_**

* * *

_This love is poison, soiled to the roots_

_The emotion muddies the water, the hatred bloodied my boots_

_If you aim, you better shoot and you better pray you kill me_

_Cuz if I get a shot at you, you're really gonna feel me_

_The drugs no longer heal me, my lungs getting enraged_

_But the ink starts to run each time that I turn the page_

_Wisdom could come with age but only if you let it_

_Your heart lays on your sleeve, are you willing to bet against it_

_Too much to think of, too little to drink but_

_I'm trying to turn the tide, I just can't find the blinker_

_Brought machine guns in my house, assault rifle under the couch_

_The man is many things but he's never one to doubt_

_There's no fair amount, do you care to spare the dime_

_Im hoping for better days or at least for God to say its time_

_There's a million dollar smile, I just wish it were mine_

_Cuz I would trade a million dollars just to say I'll be just fine_

* * *

The following Friday morning found Beca wasting no further time at all prior to her official birthday barbecue with her closest circle that they would be holding at Cynthia Rose's large estate. The man handed Beca a clipboard and a pen so that she could sign the forms needed to complete the security upgrade of the house. She had surrounded the home in wrought iron gates with three separate key codes needed to come into the gate, come into the house and exit the gate. Donald had already dropped off the firearms she had requested, a favor to her for her work on his albums as well as her birthday gift from her counterpart. He had connections with a guy who had been able to provide the best protection against threats to her home or her person as far as street knowledge was concerned. She signed the form quickly and handed it back over. He then handed her the key codes. She knew them by heart however, codes discreetly pertinent to her, and she took her lighter out, lighting the small card on fire. He gave her a smile that appeared more like a grimace as the flaming square fell to the ground between them. A few moment's pause, and he was walking back to his truck with a tentative wave over his shoulder at the brunette. She watched the gates close behind him before lighting up and heading back towards the house. Jesse was inspecting the locks on the windows and back door as well as the keypads. She gave him a nod as he looked up to see her enter. It didn't expunge every worry, but it was a start.

The week of enhanced security had surely been rough. Getting Aubrey to not only carry a pistol but learn how to wield it had proved to be a difficult feat, but the oldest sibling had at last acquiesced after Beca went off on a passionately angry rant about being fully protected for the simple fact that Warren Mitchell was out of his mind. Since then, the siblings bonded in the backyard all week shooting at targets the DJ had set up. Beca was not fully at ease, but it relieved at least a reasonable amount of stress. Aubrey could only wonder how the twins knew how to shoot so well already.

Aubrey drove up a few minutes after the security agency's vehicle departed, already retrieving the codes from her sister. Jesse silently handed his sisters a beer once their inspection was complete, and the three made their way out to the back porch. Clouds loomed overhead, a deepening grey that concealed the sun. Beca looked over the estate with eyes narrowed. She had purchased the seventy acres surrounding the home on the hill straight away in order to have the fence erected. She was sure that Warren had no idea where she lived, but she wouldn't take any chances. He had his ways. It was what had allowed him to dodge arrest for so many years before his slip-up.

"So I did everything you asked of me," Aubrey jumped in, words slicing through the tranquility of the moment. "Now, I know there's more to this story, so can you tell me why I feel like I have a price on my head?"

"Our dad's-" Jesse started, but Aubrey halted him.

"Crazy, I know, but he didn't say what he said at the club that night for no reason, so spill it. I'm your big sister, but you two are grown enough to own up to this, so tell me. Like adults. There isn't much I can do to reprimand you now, is there?"

The twins were quiet then, failing to meet the blonde's eyes. Jesse sighed after a moment, taking a long drag of the joint in his hand and running a hand through his hair, and Aubrey knew that he would wait for his twin to answer. She was his idol, and he only did what permitted by her. Beca mimicked his movements now though, anxiety building up in both of their guts. Aubrey could now see a foreign look in their eyes, one of conflicting emotions just short of fear, or concern. In perfect coordination with another, they slumped back in their chairs. She knew that they were battling with themselves. However, Beca was wise to the fact that her sister was the most persistent person on Earth. It had been one of the driving forces behind Beca's prolific career. Therefore, she at last conceded.

"Okay, Bree, just don't interrupt me," she huffed, taking a long drag of her joint and making a point to keep her eyes off of her sister. "Back in our sophomore year, we-well, there was this abandoned house in Atlanta that our dad took us to a few times to do his 'business'. When Mom bought us our trucks, we drove out to it just to check it out and get away. We were pissed off that day because Dad had called and told us all that shit about never amounting to anything, you know. It just irked us because we had no idea how a prison inmate could come to such a conclusion, you know. Anyway, we took off in my truck. I just figured it would be a quiet place to escape to for awhile. You were at work, and Mom was asleep. When we got out there though, we found a bunch of bundles of weed inside. I mean tons of it, and-and we took it. We-didn't take it all at once, but we periodically moved it to another place closer to the house. We sold it off to everyone in school, even a few teachers like Mr. Peters and Mrs. McKee-"

"How could you guys be so-" the blonde now roared, unable to fulfill the agreement of not interrupting as she scooted to the edge of her seat, but Beca interjected quickly.

"I said not to interrupt me!" Aubrey gave her a warning glare before she settled back into her chair, lips pursed. "We fucked up, okay? We did, but we felt that he owed us, and you know he did! You can't tell me that in your heart, you didn't know that something was up though."

"Are you turning this on me!" Aubrey questioned incredulously.

Beca breathed out slowly, keeping her anger in check before chuckling softly. "Quite the contrary actually, but did you really think that Neil would just pay us two hundred bucks a week to cut his grass?"

"You said you were working on cars, and he vouched for you!"

"He was a pothead! We were his suppliers. Bree, we wouldn't have survived even with Mom's disability, and you know that. We did what we had to."

"I-I can't believe that I never-I-"

Beca's eyes softened now, and she gripped her sister's shoulder firmly, navy blue meeting emerald green. "I meant what I said. It was anything but your fault. You couldn't always watch after us. It wasn't your blame to carry. It still isn't. It was our decision. We had to grow up too, and it was a simple solution to the issue. You were working so much. You didn't even get to be a kid, Bree. We never saw you, and we couldn't handle that. We just wanted to help, and we had no other way to do it. I mean, it isn't like we bought a bunch of bullshit. We bought my equipment and paid off Jesse's tuition-"

She looked at her little brother now, who hung his head. "You said it was a scholarship!"

"Of course he did! We couldn't tell you where it came from. The four thousand dollars that we used to get her weren't living expenses from the school either."

Aubrey took a moment to take deep breaths, her nerves generating a nauseous feeling now. The twins allowed her the time, sipping their beers idly until at last, the blonde resumed the discussion in a much calmer tone though the anger and irritation lingered in each word.

"So now what, B? You know he's a cold-blooded killer, and they could _never _tie him to a murder otherwise he wouldn't be free. You know him. How many times did we have to watch him bully his guys? How many times did he come home with blood on his shoes? He could-"

"Hence the enforced security."

"Becs, this is serious!"

"I know how serious it is, Aubrey!" Beca's eyes bulged, once again meeting her sister's as her fists clenched. "You think I don't? You think if I didn't, I would've brought guns into this house? You think I would have paid eight thousand dollars for a fence and security system plus the land to put it on? I'm aware of how serious it is."

The intensity of those stormy blue irises were enough to sober Aubrey immediately. She gently pinched the bridge of her nose before speaking again.

"I just really hope you know what you're doing. I mean, what? We just watch our backs until he dies or goes back to jail or something because I guarantee you, he isn't one to grow restless and give up. He would do anything for the money."

"I know that, and I'll figure it out."

"Why don't you just pay him off or give him some of all that weed you have?"

Beca's neck snapped, looking at the elder as if she had just slapped the DJ. "Fuck that! He isn't getting shit from me."

Aubrey's eyes flashed dangerously now, her tone a low growl. "That's your pride talking, and that pride is going to get us all killed, Beca! If this is about drugs, it isn't just him we have to worry about! He has goons and friends in both high and low places. He always did. It took them ten years to put him behind bars, and they couldn't even keep him long!"

The sigh that now emanated from the shorter brunette now was one of dismissal, finality in her following proposal. "Look, let's just enjoy one event tonight without drama, and I'll figure it out, okay? I just-every event lately has ended up in a fight, and I just wanna enjoy this please. I haven't had a real birthday since..."

Aubrey knew exactly what she was going to say before trailing off, and this completely thwarted the anger growing within her, the malice receding from her eyes instantly.

"Fine, but we'll talking more about this later, Becs, because he could make this so much bigger, like a public scene. He could start spreading lies, and we would be in deep."

"Yeah, I know. Just-"

"Hey, guys," came a voice from behind them then.

They all turned to find Chloe standing there with a smile on her face. Beca stood up immediately as Aubrey gave her a disbelieving look for the fact that Beca had already given the girl the key codes but nonetheless effectively laying the conversation to rest. The twins hugged the redhead before Aubrey at last shook off the shock and did the same. Jesse handed Chloe a beer, and she sat beside Beca on the porch swing. Chloe wanted so badly to ask why the security system had been so critical, but she decided that another day when they weren't celebrating Beca's birthday would have to suffice. She knew that the DJ had been to enough spoiled events for the year, and they had even moved this event back a week to give Beca time to set up security and deal with the initial aftershock of Friday night's events. Chloe herself had had a rough week, and she had not seen the brunette since Saturday. Tom had been home for a few days, and she had been forced to accompany him to a banquet the hospital was holding, her father of course being present. The entire night consisted of her parents dropping hints about marriage and children, and Chloe had been irked from the moment she walked into the hall. On Thursday however, both her father and Tom had left for a week-long medical conference in Baltimore. Still she had been forced to finish out the work week of course, but with the office shutting down half of the wing that day for renovation, Chloe had received three days off, and she planned to spend the time with Beca.

"Kendrick coming tonight?" Jesse asked at last, shattering the dense silence.

"Yeah," Beca replied, eyes cast over the land still. "He RSVP'd."

The twins snorted a laugh. "People really do that?"

"Yes, Jesse," came Aubrey now, irritation evident. "It's pragmatic and professional."

"It's a house party," he guffawed before sipping his beer.

Aubrey then grumbled something about kids, and the other three chuckled softly.

"B, what the hell are you gonna do with all this land?" he asked now.

"I don't know," the DJ huffed. "How about-we buy some horses?"

"Are you kidding me?"

She only shrugged once more, and the others laughed. The only thing in the vast yard at the moment beyond the pool were the targets they had been using for practice. Beca had been considering the option of teaching Chloe how to shoot as well, but she wasn't yet ready to alert the redhead to how critical the situation was.

"What time are we heading to CR's?" Chloe asked now, linking her arm with Beca's.

"About seven," she returned, ignoring the concerned look on her sister's face at the two.

"Is it a casual thing? I brought a few outfits just in case."

"You know, I haven't decided yet. I mean, it's a bit chill outside, so we'll probably dress down, you know. I wanna be comfortable."

"Yeah, if I wanted to be suited up, I would have suggested a more elegant setting," Aubrey sighed.

"You did," Jesse reminded her with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, right, she did," Beca backed, sarcasm apparent. "What was it? The Hilton Grand Ballroom or some shit?"

Aubrey scowled at them, and the two each flashed an innocent large grin. The resemblance in the two was annoyingly vivid in moments like this where they mirrored one another, and Chloe giggled. She could get used to this family setting. She loved it, and nothing could compare. It made the idea of telling her own family a lot less perilous.

* * *

Beca tucked her pistol under the seat of the Charger as they arrived at the CEO's estate after picking up Amy, Chloe refraining from any question to the brunette's relief. When Chloe had introduced her best friend to the DJ, the Aussie had given major praise to her music, her height or lack thereof, and her being able to bring Chloe back to life. Beca decided that she really liked Chloe's best friend, and the feeling was mutual. As they drove into the estate, the two best friends gawked at the sight, It was a large mansion in Beverly Hills but with a sizable distance between it and the other homes. Cynthia Rose had the ridiculously gigantic garage opened for her guests to park in, and Beca pulled in next to the CEO's flashy lime green Lambourghini. Amy was the first to jump out of the car and rush into the house for a drink.

"Wow, that is gorgeous," Chloe gasped as they stepped out of their vehicle and faced the Lambourghini.

"That's CR," Beca huffed. "She only has one though. The few other cars are pretty simple. She doesn't splurge much. She says she was raised with more 'sense' than 'cents', and she doesn't forget where she came from. She bought her sister Natalie and her family a nice house too though out in Santa Monica, and her grandmother is living comfortably back in Oklahoma, so she takes care of everybody."

"She's a great person."

"Yeah, she is. I mean, she did take in a hard-headed alt girl like me."

Chloe chuckled. "That is true."

"Hey." Beca grabbed Chloe's hand now as she headed for the door, pulling the redhead back and into her arms. "Thank you for being here."

"Baby, I'd spend every waking moment with you if I could, and I will when everything is set right. I'll always be here though. Trust in that."

Beca only smiled, kissing the redhead's lips softly before proceeding into the house. Cynthia Rose greeted them followed by Luke, Lily, Donald, Denise and Jessica. Everyone had already told Beca happy birthday on the actual date the prior Sunday, but they had come tonight baring gifts, which were all piled in a corner in one of Cynthia's dens for later. Aubrey, Jesse and Ashley came in right behind Beca and Chloe, and they exchanged pleasantries with the others. Soon, the other guests were arriving including Frank, Kendrick, Rihanna, Jay-Z himself and Beyonce of course. Even Pink made an appearance to drop off her gift to the DJ, a set of fresh new ear spikes with some colorful and intricate designs on them, but she was unable to stay longer due to a gig she had that night in Hollywood. Drinks were poured, Jay-Z bringing along his donation of several cases of Ace of Spades champagne for which Beca was elated. Cynthia Rose and Luke manned the grill outside underneath the thin-netted rain had still not come, but they would play it safe. Beca loved the fact that everyone just seemed like normal people. They weren't celebrities tonight. They were just friends. They lounged around Cynthia's lawn beneath the canopy more relaxed than they had ever seen one another.

"So when does this album drop, Jay?" Luke asked, flipping the steaks.

"I'm betting on around June," the man replied before sipping his glass. "Little B, I need a verse from you too." He smirked now. "Or two."

"Anything you need, Jay," she returned with a playful sigh, and he laughed.

"You're a soldier, Little B. A soldier."

"That's how he gets his way," Beyonce smirked now. "Flattery."

"I figured as much," Beca sighed.

"How do you get your way then, Little B?" Jay-Z asked.

"That damn smirk," Chloe instantly replied, and everyone chuckled as Beca shrugged.

"I concur," Aubrey added, and Jesse nodded enthusiastically.

"Hey, at least it's simple," Beca then defended. "I have to deal with big blue puppy dog eyes and the pout of baby Jesus himself to break me down."

Chloe giggled as well as the others, leaning into the DJ's arm, and Beca kissed her forehead. Frank sent a wink the redhead's way with a grin, and she returned it.

"Well now I know that when I want you to do something, I just call Chloe," Frank chortled.

"Don't take advantage, Frankie," Beca warned.

"I'll try and keep that in mind."

"You act like I've ever denied you anything."

"Yeah, but one day, I'll need something more ridiculous than normal, and I'll call in the big guns."

"Yay," came Beca's sarcastically dull squeal as Chloe swatted her arm.

Frank and Beca's closest friends admired the two for a moment, unsure of how it all happened but grateful nonetheless. Only Aubrey and Jesse watched on with worry in their eyes, apprehensive about the situation as a whole and praying that they were wrong but refusing to hold their breaths on the matter.

After dinner, Beca was forced to open her gifts though she tried over and over to have them revoked, claiming that their presence was enough. Frank at last began opening them himself, so she reluctantly took over. Frank had given her some gag gifts including a set of whips and chains, causing both Chloe and Beca to blush. He then handed over his genuine gift of a San Francisco Giants baseball jersey signed by the entirety of that year's World Series Championship team plus the Hall-of-Fame inductee Willie Mays. He was one of very few that knew of her low-key love of baseball, and she could not thank the man enough.

She received a watch from Jay-Z and Beyonce, the finest rolex known to the human race to be exact. Rihanna had literally handed over one of her many houses she owned on the shore of her home island, Barbados, and Beca was ecstatic yet speechless. She settled for a hug. The DJ also received her own personalized set of Dre Beats headphones courtesy of Kendrick and Dr. Dre where Kendrick explained that Dre wanted to speak to her soon about releasing her own line of the accessory. She was over the moon with that revelation.

To them, there wasn't anything they could give Beca that she could not get herself, but she appreciated the thought of it all the most. Jesse and Ashley had brought her the newest keyboard model, a five-thousand-dollar investment. Her label as a whole had upgraded the entire studio, adding in several top-of-the-line microphones that Beca had been eying lately. Cynthia Rose had purchased her as well as her other label mates chains with a diamond-studded Bella "B" hanging from the platinum necklace. It was an emblem that declared their association to the label the way Jay-Z had given his Roc-A-Fella artists. Beca had always loved the idea of it, and she crushed CR with a hug when the woman handed over the gift. The CEO then presented her with the plaque that signified her album going seven times platinum during the year, and Beca grinned as everyone snapped pictures. It was her first, but she did not plan for it to be her last. Aubrey had purchased her sister a surround-sound system that they had put in the gym earlier in the week for when she worked out. She had usually just put in her earphones, not bothering to install an actual system, but the blonde had thought it a good idea. Beca had loved it as well.

When she finished opening all of the presents, she thanked each and every one them with a beaming grin, and her gratitude was evident in that smile alone because smiles like that were few and far between. She wasn't aware, but that smile meant a whole lot to everyone in the room including a man as mighty as Jay-Z. He had grown fond of the DJ, and it made him happy to see her happy. The words need not be spoken.

At one in the morning, guests started clearing out. Jesse and Ashley agreed to take Amy home, and Chloe and Beca left last. Beca had a proud smile on her face as her fingers subconsciously ran over the pendent hanging from her neck for the nth time that night. As they slid into the car, Chloe pulled out a small box and handed it to the DJ. Beca's eyebrow raised at a dramatically slow speed as she gingerly took it in her hand.

"What's this?" she asked cautiously as if she expected it to blow up, fingertips handling it.

"Your gift, silly," Chloe giggled. "It isn't much, but..."

"Chloe, you didn't have to-"

"Oh, hush, Becs. I owe you so much more than that, and I wouldn't _not _get you a birthday present. That's just unorthodox."

Beca chuckled softly before she carefully unwrapped it and popped the lid on the box up. She gasped when she saw the small chain with a music note pendant dangling from it. She pulled out the silver chain, inspecting it closely with glazed eyes.

"It's nothing compared to CR's chain," Chloe sighed indignantly, "but it's my promise to you that I'm here. I'm yours, and my heart belongs to-"

On this occasion, Chloe's rant was discontinued by Beca's anxious kiss to her lips. They pulled away moments later breathing heavily. Beca pulled on the chain with haste, holding the pendant in her hand then as if weighing the small object. She turned to Chloe.

"Thank you, Baby," she breathed. "This means more than anything. I love you."

"I love you too," Chloe replied with a shy smile. "So much."

Beca could only grin, pressing a chaste kiss to the redhead's forehead before pulling out of the garage and heading back to her home. Aubrey and Jesse met them there. They had decided on a family nightcap, Chloe included. Jesse had arrived back home with several cases of beer and wine for Aubrey and Chloe, who had requested it. They all settled onto the terrace outside of Beca's master bedroom.

"Thanks, you two," Beca sighed in content, eying her siblings. "For tonight."

"Eh, we couldn't just pass up your birthday again," Jesse shrugged. "I mean, it was a bit later than planned, but with last week being botched, we wanted to do it right. CR and Luke helped a lot too, and the others cleared their schedule for it."

"Yeah, but it was a good night. No drama or anything. I was getting nervous towards the end, waiting for the punchline, you know."

"Relax, B," Aubrey chided lightly. "We got through it."

Beca smirked at her sister. "You know you were waiting for it too, Bree."

Aubrey only shrugged, sipping her glass as Jesse and Chloe chuckled.

"So what's next for you, B?" Jesse asked.

"The Grammy's in February, I believe," Beca drawled, looking to the blonde for confirmation.

"Yes," Aubrey concurred. "Grammy week will be hectic. We have like four interviews."

"Great," the small brunette replied, chugging her beer before Jesse handed her another. "I know this performance is going to big. This is my first Grammy performance actually rapping on my own, and they're making a big thing about it."

"You'll be fine," Jesse assured her. "You tore up the Staples Center last year."

"Yeah, true. If we do well though, MTV might get me on stage more for their award shows."

"Hey, you and Kendrick killed it at the VMA's though."

"We didn't have much to compare it to. I mean, come on. Miley Cyrus? Ugh."

"Yeah, we know," Aubrey scoffed, reminiscing on Beca's resonating disgust from the performance back in August. "It was-repulsive, and that image was stained on our minds for weeks, I swear."

"Now, that's an understatement. She was twerking naked on Robin Thicke. Had that been my daughter, she would've never seen the sun again."

Jesse snorted a laugh before expressing his own distaste. "I had nightmares. I can't believe they let her do that. All those little girls looking up to her, and she's up their with teddy bear pedophiles and saggy ass cheeks. I didn't eat for like three days."

"You? I couldn't even look at an apple because it reminded me of her ass. I was nauseous for a week. I mean, I really contemplated reaching out to Billy Ray Cyrus and offering to pay for a therapist. I would've even paid for Robin Thicke's AIDS test."

Aubrey immediately spat out her wine, some of the red liquid spewing from her nose as she fell into hysterics. Jesse clutched his side in laughter as Chloe giggled madly.

"He definitely needed one," the blonde quipped once she regained her composure.

"I hope Paula Patton had him checked before she took him home," Beca sighed.

"She seemed completely comfortable with a teenager working it on her husband like a strip pole," Jesse assured her. "I would hope my wife had enough sense to divorce me or at least talk me out of it before I degraded myself like that."

"You really don't like Miley, huh?" Chloe inquired now, looking at Beca.  
Jesse snorted a laugh. "B straight dissed the bitch three years ago at some MTV event. She offered B a pill and a ride home, and Beca nearly puked in her face. She was like 'Bitch, swerve before I call the truancy offer'." He barked a laugh along with his twin now.

"Really?" Chloe raised an eyebrow at the DJ.

"Hell yeah," Beca squealed. "I do have dignity, Beale. Standards. I don't just take down anyone, and that is one piece of ass I will definitely donate to world hunger."

"What ass?" Jesse jeered.

"True."  
"Lady Gaga had more ass than she did. Somewhere, Sir Mix-A-Lot was crying."

Another round of laughter, Jesse and Beca falling over each other in the process as Aubrey held her stomach.

"I swear to God, if they give her a slot at the Grammy's, I'll quit music," Beca breathed.

"I would totally back you," Jesse affirmed. "She's a disgrace."

"Hey, you did work on her album, B," Aubrey reminded her.

"Yeah, when she wasn't bat-shit crazy!" Beca debated in a high-pitched tone. "Before the 'Molly' movement, she was a good kid. Then boom. All of a sudden, she's on the internet twerking like she was raised in a 'ratchet' neighborhood. Like she wasn't fresh off Disney and shit. Ugh."

Beca shuddered at the entire thought, sipping her beer generously as if it would cure the disdain. Chloe chuckled, latently moving a lock of hair behind the DJ's ear.

The night went pretty much in this fashion full of hearty laughter and spit drinks. It was calm, and Beca could not complain. It had been an extraordinary birthday, the best in a long time. The year prior had been spent on tour promoting the album release. A year before that, she had been in the studio with Demi Lovato working on her project. Work had consumed the last four birthdays in actuality, and the last real birthday she had had was before her mother had succumbed to her illness. She still remembered the vivid image of her mother bringing out an elegant birthday cake she had made from scratch. She had been in a wheelchair already, exhausted more often than not, but she still always made the three children their birthday cakes. It was sentimental to Anna in her own way, and she could not be deterred from the task. Beca's had been a two-layer chocolate cake, maraschino cherries blanketing the first layer below the second and a creamy vanilla icing job. It was Beca's favorite, but none of them ever tried to reciprocate it. However, Beca would never forget the birthdays. On those days, Anna looked anything but terminally ill. She had a light in her eyes that gleamed brighter than any star. Her skin was not as sallow, and it was delicate the way it had been before the cancer had arrived. She had a glow about her that illuminated the eyes of her children, but she had never allowed them to focus on her during those birthdays or Christmas. In those times, she was not ill. She was still their stunningly beautiful mother with her shiny auburn locks and radiant hazel green eyes. Beca would never have another birthday of that fashion, but she was slowly beginning to enjoy them again as much as she could. She had thrown herself into her work years prior to keep the pain and agony at bay, but this year, she had at last given into a true celebration. She had her siblings, her compassionate friends and even Chloe. Maybe birthdays would not be as bad as she had projected in the coming years if they were anything like this.


	13. We Don't Negotiate With Terrorists

**_A/N: So are you guys still with me? Last chapter was super quiet. No feedback really. just wondering. Anyway, thank you to those sticking with me. I greatly appreciate it. I hope that you're still enjoying it as much as I am. _**

* * *

_NOTHIN LESS THAN PERFECT, NOTHIN MORE THAN CHANCE_

_I LOOK AT IT AS A PRIVILEGE, ITS JUST CASH IN ADVANCE_

_19 YEARS OF SUMMIN UP MY STRUGGLES INTO RHYMES_

_SO WHEN I WAS DYIN BEHIND BARS, I WAS LIVIN BETWEEN THE LINES_

_HERE I AM, WHAT THE GAME'S BEEN MISSIN_

_MAJOR CLAIM TO FAME, MINOR OPPOSITION_

_GLARED AT BY HATERS, GAZED AT BY ASTRONOMERS_

_I GOT SICK CATS IN MY COMPANY, OLIVER_

_WE IN THE CRIB WITH 4 BOTTLES OF LIQUOR_

_4 30 PACKS AND 4 SACKS IN THE SWISHERS_

_AND A COUPLE ROLE MODELS OR MODELS THAT ROLE PLAY_

_SEE WE DO WHAT WE PLEASE AND YOU BREEDS HAVE NO SAY_

_RELEASED DECEMBER 1-2, PAROLE DATE_

_MY TRACKS IN THE CLUB LIKE WHEELS, WATCH EM ROTATE_

_KEEP YA FOOT OUT MY WAY, I DONT DO GUILT TRIPS_

_RIDING TIL THE WHEELS FALL OFF, FIELD TRIP_

_THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYMORE, I MAKE EM FEEL SICK_

_TRY TO TAKE MY MONEY TO COURT, REAL SLICK_

_DEAL WITH IT, I'LL PROVE THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME_

_IF YOU EVER WISH TO RETURN, LEAVE ME ALONE_

* * *

The year had not started off the way Beca would have preferred it to. New Year's found her at MGM Grand in Las Vegas for a concert at the last minute, like the day prior to New Year's Eve last minute with no one, especially a beautiful redhead, to kiss. It had been a successful turnout however which had landed her an invite to the iHeart Radio music festival in the fall, a spot she had been vying for since the start of her career. Once she returned from the show, she was thrown into her work on her own album, the demand from Def Jam and Universal Music Distribution through the roof after the performance. They wanted a strictly rap album with Beca both producing the instrumentals as well as penning the lyrics. Her last album had indeed been a rap album to industry standards, but there had been many collaborations over more electronic beats. It had worked out this time, landing the project in the running for best rap album with the likes of Jay-Z and Drake as well best EDM album aside David Guetta and Skrillex. Still, her confidence in her hip-hop persona had been boosted lately, and she felt the urge to write more and more lyrics. Her phone was filled with verses she had thought up during down time, and she was excited that Universal as well as Def Jam had demanded the project to be centered around her rap verses. Work would really kick into high gear after the Grammy Awards during the second weekend of February, but for now, she would begin laying foundation for the endeavor.

Beca sat her coffee mug down atop her desk before inhaling a deep puff of smoke and expelling it into the air, a hazy curtain rising over her sullen face. She glanced at the clock, now once again at the top of the hour. That made, what? Hmm, fifty-two hours without sleep now? She had taken her work home in hopes of getting some sleep somewhere around the forty-hour mark, and still she sat in the loft going over the track that she had spontaneously wrote for her mother.

It would be her most intimate track to date. She knew that. Christmas had prompted it. The holiday as always was borderline depressing especially after Chloe's last-minute change in plans. Jesse tried to make it more jovial, but Beca could never get into it. Ever since Anna's passing, it had been just another day to mourn what could no longer be. The song had been an all-day activity for the DJ, and she had tweaked it at least one hundred times since. Now, as she worked on the dark and tear-jerking beat, her mind was reeling. Sleep had refused to interfere with the process no matter how many times she slipped under her sheets. No matter how long she lay idly staring up at the ceiling, she always ended up getting up and returning to her desk or the loft to continue working on it. It was perseverance that would either make or break her. Hell, maybe both.

The brunette dropped her head in her hands now, her nerves chattering in her gut. Midnight again and no chance of sleep. When she heard her door creek open, she refrained from looking up, expecting Jesse again with suggestions of eating or actually sleeping with one of his Ambien. She would hate to decline the offers again. She then felt a soft hand place itself on her shoulder, and she looked up to meet bright blue eyes. Despite her sleep deprivation, she smiled up at the redhead, and Chloe returned it.

"Baby, how long have you been awake?" Chloe whispered, taking in the DJ's appearance of deep, dark circles around her bloodshot eyes and limp muscles.

"Uh, I-" Beca looked over at the clock again, her bottom lip jutting out as she considered the response. "Like, eh, fifty hours or so."

"Babe!" Chloe immediately pulled the brunette out of her chair and over to the couch in the loft, Beca much too drained to put up a fight. "You need sleep. You're going to drive yourself mad working like that."

Beca did not reply at first, instead opting to rest her head in Chloe's lap as the redhead ran her fingers through the soft brown tresses. The shorter woman's eyes immediately fluttered closed, indulging herself in the delicate touch of the redhead's digits.

"It-it was-song for Mom," the DJ yawned.

"It'll be perfect, Baby, but it'll be much better with sleep," Chloe assured her. "You know, your hearing isn't up to par during sleep deprivation. Tomorrow, you'll be cleared up and ready to go again one hundred percent."

"You're-so-smart. I-love..."

Chloe smiled down at the woman lovingly. "I love you too, DJ."

Beca's breathing soon evened out, Chloe proceeding with her strokes through her hair. The brunette had been asleep all of ten minutes when her phone began ringing aloud in her pocket. She jolted into a sitting position so quick that her head narrowly missed a collision with Chloe's. She frantically reached for the device, breathing labored and heart racing. At last, she extracted it and answered it, eyes bulging.

"Yeah," she panted.

"B, I need you down here now!" Luke shouted into the phone. "The studio's on fire!"

She snapped wide awake. "What!"

"Your dad! Just get down here now!"

The women were downstairs and headed out of the house the moment Beca hung up with Luke. Jesse had been sitting in the kitchen looking over his newest script scene, and when Beca quickly gave him a short summary of what had happened, he had quickly trailed behind them. Chloe drove them down the road to Bella Studios in record time, and when they arrived, they were met with the sight of the smoldering right wall of the building. Firefighters were in the process of putting it out. Beca knew that the offices would be damaged without doubt. The studios were housed in the left wing, and she only hoped that the priceless equipment within had been unscathed. She was in awe, unable to step out of the car at first. In her deliriously anxious state, she could only gawk at the scene before her. Cynthia Rose and Luke stood with Lily and a trio of police. When Chloe shook the brunette's shoulder softly, she at last jumped out of the car and raced over to where her team stood. Luke was the first to notice her, and he took deliberate steps forward to meet her halfway, both hands out and landing on her shoulders to halt her.

"What happened?" she breathed, looking back at the flames still licking the inner wall.

"Lily was still here," he began, dropping his hands. "Donald was going to pick her up because her car's in the shop, so the place looked abandoned. Anyway, she recognized his face after he threw a bottle at the wall. She heard it shatter and ran to the door. He was running around the building and down the hill. She called the fire department and CR when she saw the flames."

"Goddammit!"

The brunette stomped her foot, her fists clenching. Chloe was by her side in seconds along with Aubrey, and they each grabbed a shoulder as the police approached her. Beca was then forced to go over the incident at the club's grand opening before explaining the entirety of her father's situation to them. When they were able to run his name, they found that the parole board had granted him permission to relocate to California to "be closer to his children". Beca was about to snap at that point. With her father's recklessness and her own lack of rest, she was quickly on the path to going crazy on the next person to step out of line in her narrow-minded judgement.

When the police finished their questioning, and the fire was completely out, Beca leaned against Chloe's car, a look of pure rage etched on her features. The moment the patrol cars vacated the premises, Beca lit up and took several drags without intermission while CR and Luke inspected the studios. A walkthrough confirmed that only two of the offices were really damaged, the middle one more so by water damage than anything. Be that as it may, Beca's mood did not enlighten in the slightest. Jesse stood beside her, a distant look in his eyes as he stared out over the hill. Aubrey stepped in front of Beca soon, Chloe at her shoulder.

"You need to just pay him," the blonde concluded sternly.

"Look, Aubrey, don't-" Beca growled, but the blonde was not finished.

"No, Beca, you 'don't'. This is only going to get worse if you don't-"

"You think he has a set price! If I show him weakness even once, he will keep doing this shit over and over until one of us dies for it!"

"Are you willing to die for it!"

"I'm willing to kill for it."

The look in Beca's eyes now was much deeper than anger or rage. It was the iciest of stares that could pierce the most fearless of souls. Aubrey visibly recoiled at what she found in those stormy blue orbs, and Chloe's blood ran cold. It was almost not Beca that they were seeing before them. They knew she could be angry, mad, detached, distant and many other things, but never had they seen this look of unadulterated savagery, an expression that conveyed a sadistic type of hunger. Her brother's blood was boiling, but that look sobered him as well, submitting him into fear. Chloe did not like the look, and she immediately stepped in front of Aubrey, taking Beca's face in her hands gently and locking their gazes. As the bright cerulean orbs bore into hers, Beca felt the madness gradually decline. The color came back to her eyes, a deep navy rather than the cloudy grey.

"What is going on?" Chloe demanded in a low but firm tone. "I need to know."

Chloe need only ask twice for Beca to succumb to that gaze and spill the entire situation from beginning to end. She was much too exhausted to argue or restrain herself from telling Chloe, so she allowed her tongue to run free. When she finished, with added commentary from her brother, Chloe stood gaping at the brunette. Beca averted her gaze, blatant shame in her posture. Aubrey was nervously biting her lip as Jesse mirrored his twin sister's stance. Luke and Cynthia Rose too stood near the hood of the car, listening to the DJ's explanation of their current strife. No one really knew what to say. Regardless, no one was surprised that Chloe was the one to shatter the silence in a stern voice.

"You have to find a way to barter with him," she concluded.

Beca grunted. "It isn't that easy, Chloe. You give him an inch, he takes a mile."

"Then what, Beca? Are you gonna kill him? Is that your ingenius plot?"

"I-I don't know, but how else do you expect to end it?"

"You at least have to try and talk to him."

"This isn't your perfect world over here, Chloe! Jesus! He's a drug dealer and a murderer. He isn't one to negotiate."

"But you're his kids."

"Yeah, his filthy rich kids, the same kids he put second to the money all of their lives, and he'll skin us alive for every cent to our name if we let him."

"Just try and talk to him, Beca. He wants something, give it to him."

"Just talk to him? One, the first part of that suggestion was hypocritical. You should just talk to _your _dad." Chloe looked taken aback by this confrontation. "And two: I'm not you, okay? I don't just give into Daddy's wishes because I want to see him happy."

"That isn't the reason, and you know it, Beca," Aubrey now stepped in for the shocked redhead, leveling her sister with a stone glare. "This isn't about Chloe. The longer this goes on, the more danger you put all of us in. Don't you get it? Had Lily not heard it or had he seen her, she could have been killed! It could have been much worse than that! He found the studio. He could find our homes!"

"It's in the directory, Aubrey, of course he found the fuckin' studio!"

Chloe had snapped out of her trance now, and she stepped into Beca's space once more, grabbing the lapels of her plaid shirt and pulling her closer.

"Baby, please," she breathed. "Please don't do this to us, to yourself. Just please try to end this as cleanly as possible. I can't watch you ruin your life for this. Just try, please. If he won't agree to it, I'll stand behind whatever you decide, but I'm asking you to try because no amount of money in this world is worth your life."

Those eyes. For over two years, whether they be the real thing or a ghost of them, those eyes had been Beca's kryptonite. They could bring her to her knees in an instant, puppeteering her easily with one glance, one look. Now, as they were glossed over with unshed tears, was no different. Beca's reserves slowly cracked before completely shattering around her. Her nod was sluggish but firm.

"Okay," she sighed. "I'll talk to him. I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you." Chloe kissed her forehead softly. "Thank you, Baby."

In spite of her fathomless exhaustion and the redhead laying bare beside her, Beca's sleep that night consisted of endless tossing, turning and jolts awake periodically through the hours. When she would bolt upright in bed, Chloe would follow suit, grabbing the brunette's face instantaneously to bring her back to Earth in the face of her terrors. She would be slick with cold sweat, breathing labored as she sought to register her surroundings. Such a horrific look in those steel blue eyes was uncanny to say the least, but Chloe was solid with each arrival of it.

"Baby, it's okay," Chloe coaxed softly after Beca's sixth or seventh arousal. "It's okay."

"I-I fucked up," Beca gulped, running a hand over her face. "I did."

"What happened? In your dream?"

"I-he-Jesse."

It was all she could muster before she shivered and clamped her mouth closed in order to avoid completely coming undone. Chloe brought her down into her arms, holding the brunette as closely as possible. It took no genius to understand Beca's fear, and Chloe would not be surprised if Jesse was across the hall admitting the same fear to Ashley. The brunette could see the outcome had she followed her original plot of waiting it out or going toe to toe with her father. The demise of her closest half was imminent on that path, and Beca could not have that. It was not a tragedy that she could handle. She had lost her mother, and it had ruptured something in the depths of her core, but the death of her twin brother would be the death of her and vice versa. Still, the one she was most concerned for while conscious was the redhead beside her, knowing that Warren Mitchell knew no boundaries. If he saw a weakness in the opposition, he would attack it with unabating malice. For Chloe and their future, which had yet to begin, Beca would choke down her pride and negotiate with the first and last man to ever hurt her, to tear her down in a way that only a biological father could. He was not worth the loss. The cost was much too great to side with pride. In the meantime, until Beca could get in contact with Warren, other matters would fully dominate the brunette's attention, whether she appreciated them or not. In this case, she did not.

"Look, I-I can't do it right now, B, I'm sorry," Chloe huffed for the hundredth time that week.

"Chloe, this is the most important night of the year, and I want you to be there," Beca defended.

"I know, but I-I just can't right now."

"We can just say that you're my friend."

"Beca, they'll recognize me from the Coachella pictures. I just know it."

Beca paced across the terrace, taking multiple drags from the joint fixed between her fingers within a minute. She ran a hand through her hair again, and the agitated tension was evident in her posture. Chloe was practically cowering in the doorframe, unwilling to say anything else for fear of tugging the lever that would inevitably unleash the argument about making them official, an argument that both parties had incessantly avoided since the start of their arrangement. However, despite Chloe's fears, the DJ was surprisingly calm after the redhead's continuous defiance. In truth, Beca had avoided the argument for the simple fact that she knew she would lose, and she didn't want to face that loss just yet. In fact, Beca had pretty much accepted the fact that Chloe would never be fully hers, not forever, so she was savoring the time she did have with the redhead.

At last Beca halted her steps. She knew that Chloe was still worried about telling her father and Tom about them, and being a secret was never easy. Once upon a time, Beca hated to be center of attention, and she was the worst enemy of commitment. Two and a half years ago to be exact before Chloe revived her, but now, she was not one to be hidden behind the scenes, and she wanted nothing more than to be with Chloe. In the past month, she had kept their relations completely covered from any and all press. Warren had yet to make any noise since the fire, the DJ still struggling to get ahold of him, so Beca had been solely focused on Chloe. Now, the Grammy's were the most crucial event in the industry just weeks away, and she wanted the redhead there by any means. Desperate times called for desperate measures and all that, and her irrational thinking was now controlling her speech.

"Wh-what if you bring Tom?" she asked just above a whisper so that Chloe had to strain to hear. Even when the redhead registered her inquiry, she was in shock and could not readily reply. At last she focused.

"B-Beca, no," she breathed. "I-I don't wanna put you in that-"

"Chloe." The brunette looked up at her now with pleading eyes, lip quivering slightly. "I need you there, okay? I can handle it for a night. I'll be too nervous to pay attention. We take him to the event and ditch him after."

"I can't just ditch him, after, Beca. He'll want-"

"Okay, whatever he wants. I need you there though."

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

Chloe took a moment to process the entire conversation, and her mind automatically reeled through every possible outcome of such a bold decision. However, the desperation in the brunette's stormy blue eyes hindered her judgement. She nodded slowly.

"O-okay, I'll ask him," she sighed. "What-what's the date?"

"February thirteenth," Beca eagerly returned before pulling the woman into her arms.

Chloe chuckled into her neck. "You're crazy, Beca Mitchell."

"It's what love will do to you," the brunette shrugged.

Beca was able to fully conceal the painful realization of her proposal, and she planned to do so until it was closed. To allow the douchebag access to such a prominent event, especially to her, and not be able to hug and kiss Chloe if she won an award was going to be rigorous, but she just wanted Chloe present. She figured it would be just fine.

Well, Beca figured wrong. Three days after coming to the solution, Chloe called her to let her know that the medical community was holding their own awards ceremony in Denver that weekend, and Chloe would be attending with Tom and her father. She had expected an outburst from the DJ, but instead, she was only met with a calm voice.

"Okay that's fine. Understood." _Click_.

When she glanced at the screen, Chloe confirmed that she had in fact been hung up on. If their relationship was strained before, it was dangerously close to its breaking point now.

Aubrey eyed her sister carefully. She had witnessed the DJ's face go from bright and excited to enraged then to stoic in a matter of mere seconds after answering the call that had just come in. It had only taken those few minutes for Beca to answer the call, offer a greeting and a muttered sentence then hang up. The blonde did not avert her gaze when Beca turned back to face her, but the younger sibling only brushed her off with a grunt and returned to her chair in front of the mixing console, eyes returning to Donald in the booth. Aubrey stood behind the shorter woman idly, and she cast a sideways glance at her brother, who was sitting near the door waiting for the two so that they could head out to lunch. He too had seen Beca's wave of quickly alternating emotions, and he looked confused whereas Aubrey simply looked concerned. They knew what it was, but neither really wanted to admit it to themselves.

When Beca at last called the session, she talked to Donald a few moments before following her siblings out of the studio. They wound up at Denise's for some privacy as they went over Grammy Week coming up. Jesse had also been nominated in a few categories, so he was working out a schedule as well with his oldest sister's aide. Beca was only listening to Aubrey speak in all actuality as the DJ took tentative bites of her filet mignon and mashed potatoes. When the blonde realized that she was not receiving any feedback, she trailed off to stare at her sister. Beca could feel those emerald eyes on her, but she refused to look up.

"Beca," Aubrey called softly though there remained a tinge of warning in the word.

"Yeah?" Beca sighed, at last looking up.

"Where's your head?"

"On my shoulders the last time I checked."

Aubrey huffed. "Okay, even the snark can't cover it up. Spill."

"Look, Bree, I don't want to hear anyone's I told you so' today, okay?"

Because Aubrey had eventually told her so. Following Christmas where Chloe had blown off dinner with them, which she had consented to the weekend of Beca's birthday dinner, to accompany Tom to a cabin up in the mountains, Aubrey had in fact talked to her sister thoroughly about the situation. She only received "I know" in response more often than not, but she had spoken anyway. Beca blamed it on the newly established weekly lunch dates the blonde had taken up with Stacie, and though Aubrey swore up and down they never discussed Beca, the wrinkle in Aubrey's nose when she swore it told her otherwise. She no longer wanted to hear what anyone said because deep down, even if she knew they were right, there was no way that she could stop herself from pursuing what her sister had deemed a lost cause. At that point, Aubrey had been uncharacteristically supportive in a cause that she heavily debated. She had after backed Chloe the night of the studio fire although it was as much for her benefit as it was for the redhead's.

"She can't come to the Grammy's then?" Aubrey asked softly, sympathy now in her eyes.

Beca subconsciously grabbed at the music note hanging from her neck as she shook her head. Jesse instantly felt the hollow aching in his chest at the revelation, knowing that it was derived from what Beca was feeling. It was in these times that he wished they weren't twins with such a bond. It wasn't that it was inconvenient or infuriating. He could deal with feeling what Beca felt. The part that irked him was that though he could feel it, he could not fix it. It was like being able to see the future but not being able to change it. This only intensified that ache.

"Beca, I'm not trying to upset you, but-" Aubrey began, but Beca vehemently shook her head.

"Then don't because you will if you finish that sentence," she responded in a detached tone. "I already know, and I understand. She can't go, and you're right, but I love her. I may be shattered to pieces sooner than later, but I'm a big girl. I'll get over it."

She would get over it but not on that night. Or three nights later after the 72-hour silent treatment she had given Chloe and her condition became steadily worse. A breakdown was no surprise. Never had Jesse been in this sort of position. There had been times, like after their mother's funeral, that Beca had held her brother in her arms late into the night as he tried to pretend he wasn't crying. He had already been an adult when she held him for hours, and though it was not in her nature to console, her twin brother had always been the exception because to soothe him was to soothe herself from the transfer of the emotion. Tonight however, it was Jesse who had his arms wrapped tightly around the DJ as she silently sobbed into his chest. His eyes were rimmed red, but he would not cry. For once, he had to be strong for Beca. He had to return the favor and be her rock, her saving grace. Seeing his sister so broken was brand new to him, but he wouldn't dwell on that aspect. He just wanted her to get better. Aside from Beca's labored breaths, the only thing heard was Aubrey downstairs making dinner. The blonde was well aware of what was taking place upstairs, but she had promised Jesse not to interfere if he allowed her to stay and prepare dinner. Beca was far beyond caring about who saw her cry at that point because she could no longer hold it in. She knew her brother would never judge her or reprimand her. He would simply stand beside her and do whatever it was that needed to be done. He would not speak. He would just sit and listen or sit period. He would hold her like he was now doing without so much as a word, and that was all Beca needed. She didn't need a pep talk or vocal understanding. She just needed her brother's presence. Aubrey on the other hand, though promising not to interfere with her coping mechanism, never promised to stay out of the situation as a whole. Therefore, when Chloe came knocking that night just as Aubrey was setting the table, the blonde was at the door in a flash to answer it without disturbing the twins. She opened the door, stepping outside and in front of Chloe as she closed it behind her once more. She could see the redhead's face drain of color, body growing rigid, and she was glad. Chloe should be scared right now because Aubrey was not one to fuck with, especially when it came to the twins.

"I-" Chloe immediately began, but Aubrey cut in.

"Don't explain yourself," she warned in a ice cold tone, colder than Chloe had ever heard it, and it sent chills down her spine. "Don't make excuses or promises you don't intend to keep. We have watched you tear her down for too long. She has defended you, stood up for you, protected you from the paparazzi, from _us. _She broke her best friend's heart, a woman who has stood by her side for five years and not just for sex, a woman who would do anything to make her happy and see her safe and secure, to keep that rare smile in place or even that smirk. She walked away from a woman who could have any man or woman on this planet and chose to trail Beca, to love and console her after the first time you ran away. Yes, I know the truth, Chloe. I'm not stupid. Yet, you still continue to tear her to pieces, to undermine her as well as us, and she won't come to us because she doesn't want to face judgement. I don't care what your reasoning is anymore, Beale. I'm pretty sure Beca has the scariest dad out of any of us, and she stood up to him, so your excuse is invalid. Your reasoning holds no merit, and I will not stand by and watch you tear her apart. Now, I'm going inside, and I'm going to finish dinner. You have two options and only two. You can decide right now exactly when you're going to at least break up with Tom, and then you can come inside. I'll set out a fourth plate, no problem. Or you can decide not to tell him and turn around, walk away. I won't tell Beca, who is currently upstairs having a breakdown that she doesn't think I know about, that you were here tonight. We can leave it at that. Those are your choices, and there is no negotiation."

With a curt nod signifying the finality of it, the blonde turned and walked back inside, closing the door behind her. She had no idea if that door would open again, and she had no idea if she wanted it to. However, she had set her terms, and they would either be met or they would be ignored. Something in her gut told her though that whether or not Chloe walked in right now, it would still end in anything but Beca's favor.


	14. Put On A Show

**_A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and PMs! I greatly appreciate it. I hope that you're still enjoying it as much as I am. For the record though, all verses unless stated otherwise are originals from me just so its clear because I got a few PMs about it. thank you to those as well and everyone for the reviews that have stayed around and given me an opinion. it means so much. I wish i had spare time to reply to you all. thank you though. much love!_**

* * *

_Can you handle the truth? The walls are closing in_

_I called out for help, I wondered just where you've been_

_They say what we have built is a purely mortal sin_

_But I tend to think otherwise, what was every other lie_

_These other guys, do they really match up to me_

_Ive been running from tomorrow but it'll catch up to me_

_I guarantee it, I've been exercising demons with no bench press_

_And they labelled me a king but I refuse to wear the headdress_

_That's abuse of power, relationships go sour_

_Fifteen minutes of fame, I've been up here for an hour_

_I'm just tired and these lights keep blinding me but you're a sight to see_

_But if you bring out the wrong in me, could you really be right for me?_

* * *

As Aubrey finished up the rice she was working on, she heard the front door open. She froze instinctively before cautiously turning around. Chloe stood there, eyes red from tears but the offending moisture already wiped away. She offered a weak smile.

"I'm telling him when he gets back from Cleveland next week," she assured Aubrey in a strong tone that had the blonde at least slightly convinced.

Aubrey did not respond. She only pulled another plate from the cabinet and set it on the fourth place at the table. Chloe wordlessly began helping her set the table with the food dishes, and soon, Beca and Jesse were trumping down the stairs. When the DJ saw Chloe, she nearly fell down the steps. She would have, had her brother not grabbed her arm to hold her steady. Her eyes bulged, and Jesse could see they were about to well up once more. She quickly turned and headed back up the stairs. Aubrey looked at Chloe before jerking her head towards the staircase, urging the redhead to follow. Chloe need not be told twice. She rushed up to the master bedroom. Beca was lighting up on the terrace when Chloe stepped out. She knew that she needed to say what she had to say because if she tried to foreshadow it in any way, Beca would pounce, and the ensuing argument would not allow her to do so.

"Beca, I'm breaking up with Tom the day he gets back from Cleveland," she asserted. "Then, I'm going to tell my dad about us. They have another banquet for the local awards next weekend, so I know my dad will be in town. I'm going to tell him because I'm not going to lose you, not again. I promised your sister."

Beca had to smirk at that because no one ever broke a promise to Aubrey Posen if they wanted to live to see another day. She turned to look at Chloe, and as she met those deep azure eyes, the smirk fell away. She took a deep hit of the joint, flicking the ashes over the balcony. Gathering all of the strength that she could muster, she gave response.

"We can't do this," she croaked. "I mean, you can stay for dinner and all. We can hang, but I-we can't pretend everything's okay when it isn't. I can play your friend for a week, but I'm done pretending that this is really us. Every time I kiss you or hold you, it feels like one big conspiracy, and _I _feel guilty. I don't want to be the home wrecker. I don't want to lie to anyone. I-I- all of this has made me more insecure than I've ever been, and I was a very insecure kid, so that speaks volumes. I just need it to be real or not be at all because I've been lying to myself for too long."

Chloe froze for a moment before nodding. "Okay, deal."

It was a last minute trip to New York for Beca to record her verses for Jay-Z's album. He had told her which songs, and she had written to both of them in just a few short hours. The verses were exquisite if she did say so herself. She would be staying at the five-star hotel just up the street from the notorious "Roc The Mic" Studio where Jay-Z recorded. They recorded all day Tuesday and Wednesday. Aubrey had come along as well of course, and she watched the magic take place after going over the grueling contracts and paperwork with Jay-Z's representation team. She had never been a fan of hip-hop prior to the start of Beca's career, but now she was an avid listener, and she herself could pick apart each building block of any album, song or verse perfectly thanks to the DJ. Seeing the passion rising through Beca's voice was still surreal each and every time because no two verses were ever delivered the same, but the fire was always consistent. The love for the art was always genuine and no longer missing the way it had been prior to that fateful Coachella weekend.

On Thursday night, after dinner with Roc Nation's highest heads as well as signed artist J. Cole, who had approached Beca with the offer of working on his project which Beca had accepted, the DJ received a text message from the redhead saying that she was waiting for Tom to come home. They were having dinner with her parents at their apartment, but after that, she was going to tell her boyfriend that it was over. Beca did not allow herself to get excited just yet. She reserved it for when all was final. Either way, she had planned to surprise the redhead after work the following day. Chloe expected her home Sunday, but with finishing the recording already, Aubrey and Beca were headed home a bit early. Seconds after the text came in, Beca decided to call the redhead.

"Hey, Baby," Chloe greeted brightly.

"Hey," Beca chuckled.

"I miss you so much."

"I miss you too, but I'll be home soon. Then we can go shopping for your Grammy dress."

"Oh, we don't have to do that."

"Uh, yes, we do, Beale. I have an image to uphold."

Beca knew the redhead was rolling her eyes. "Please, Mitchell, no one can handle all this. I can wear a paper bag and still compliment you."

"I agree. However, the Grammy's do have a dress code."

"Wardrobe malfunctions?"

"Nope."

"You know damn well there's no dress code, B."

"Wow, you're really taking this hip-hop first lady thing to a new level."

"You know it. I've been reading Urban Dictionary for practice."

"Dedicated. I like that."

"I thought you would. Anyways, Baby, I better get going, okay?"

"Okay, Baby, me too. It's late."

"Oh, right. The time difference. Will I talk to you tomorrow?"

"Uh, probably in the evening, Love. I have a lot to finish up so I can get home on time."

"Okay, no worries, Baby, but as soon as you get home, we celebrate."

Beca smirked. "Do I invite the magazines?"

"Hmm, I'll consider it."

The brunette snorted a laugh. "Of course, Red."

Chloe smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too." And Beca was at ease, allowing herself to get a little excited.

When Friday came, the plane could not take off fast enough for Beca. They were departing New York at two in the afternoon eastern time, so it would be eleven in California. Chloe would be off of work at five, so she would pick up flowers before heading over to the dental office. She had yet to turn her phone back on, switching it off following her call with Chloe to get some much needed rest. She had slept sixteen hours, the most sleep in a very long time. She usually averaged that in a week during a good month, but she was grateful for it now. Aubrey had awakened her half an hour before they were set to leave, and at last, they were on the plane and in the air headed home.

When they arrived at the airport, Jesse and Ashley awaited them. Jesse had brought the Charger for Beca to take, and he and Ashley would drive Aubrey home. The DJ's siblings grinned at her proudly, Aubrey feeling more at ease than she had in awhile.

"Go get her," Jesse urged, patting his twin sister's shoulder.

"I plan to," Beca replied, patting his chest before moving to Aubrey.

The blonde smiled down at the DJ, and Beca couldn't help but grin. There were no words to be said. Instead, the elder took the younger in a tight embrace, a light kiss on the crown of her head before parting. Aubrey watched her sister drive off then, and her body relaxed as relief washed over her. At last, Beca would be complete. Her little sister would receive her happy ending, and she could definitely learn to like the new Chloe that didn't have to hide her emotions from anyone. That was a trait to admire.

Beca had just enough time to stop for flowers before Chloe would be getting off. Her nerves were in overdrive, excitement beginning to bubble in her gut. Today would mark the start of a new chapter. Today she could finally begin to refer to Chloe as her girlfriend, and she was beyond elated. She didn't even realize she was smiling like a goofball throughout the ride. She had Novacane on repeat via her iPod plugged into the stereo, and she was singing along animatedly. She picked up twelve dozen roses and four lilies, a flower that she had long known the meaning of. She had never expected to ever need one, but this felt like a relevant cause. At last, with two minutes to five o'clock, she pulled into the parking lot of the dentist's office and parked beside Chloe's car. She stepped out of her own vehicle, wringing her hands in angst as she awaited Chloe's appearance. At last, she saw the redhead coming around the building, and a huge grin spread across her face. She was about to reach in through the passenger window to retrieve the flowers when she noticed that Chloe was not alone. No, Tom was following behind her with a smile, and the redhead laughed at something he said. Beca froze. It was too late to make a dash now. When Chloe saw her standing there, her eyes widened. Tom however, only smiled wider.

"Hey, B!" the man greeted, lunging forward and hugging her, and it took everything in her not to shove him off. At last, he stepped back. "Hey, sorry about the Grammy's. If those awards weren't so damn important to the board, we would be there no doubt."

"Oh, uh, no problem," Beca nervously replied.

"What are you doing out here?" It was curious and not accusing to both Beca's relief and chagrin.

"Uh, well, I just got back from New York, and I-was just coming to let Chloe know."

"Oh, so she hasn't told you the good news yet?"

Beca met his eyes now without reservation, the boyish grin flashing before her, and her stomach churned. She wasn't sure what the 'good' news could be, but as she now took in Chloe, she knew it wasn't good for her. The redhead's face had drained of color, body livid and eyes glazed over though they didn't exactly meet Beca's. At last, choking down her fear, she shook her head timidly. Tom's grin only grew impossibly larger, and it almost made her nauseous. He grabbed Chloe's hand, yanking her stiff body forward and holding out the limb he had seized. Beca's heart jumped into her throat. She didn't have to look down. She knew what was there, but her eyes nonetheless fell upon the large diamond ring on her left hand. She was shaking now. She could feel it, but she stilled herself to the best of her ability and looked back up at him with the most forced of smiles.

"Wow, that-that-" she stammered, but Tom cut her off.

"Great, right?" he beamed. "Three years, and I finally got up the courage to ask her. We're getting married! I'm shooting for a summer wedding, but I don't know. We'll see."

"Yeah, that-that's great. Congratulations to both of you. I-I have to get going, but, uh, yeah, we'll have to celebrate or something."

"Yeah, sure. We'll set something up. Maybe you can DJ the wedding. You think?"

"Uh, I-can check my schedule."

"Sounds good. See ya, B."

"Later. Goodbye, Chloe."

And Chloe knew that this goodbye was different from any other. It was final. It was the last.

Beca rushed around the car as briskly as her legs would take her without actually sprinting, and she drove out of the parking lot. She gritted her teeth, willing the imminent breakdown to wait just a bit longer, to give her just enough time to reach somewhere private and secluded. She raced up the hills of LA towards the infamous sign and onto that landing that her and her siblings habitually escaped to. She arrived there in record time, throwing the roses and lilies out of her window on the way, and the moment she reached it, she killed the engine and broke into body-wrenching sobs. Her body shook intensely, chest constricted by the torment being executed upon her heart. She could hear it shatter over and over in her mind, and soon, she could not comprehend her surroundings or her thoughts. Everything was a blur, but she did not care. It wasn't as if focus would aide in the current situation. She felt no urge do anything, not even to smoke a joint, and that terrified her. How would she face Aubrey or Jesse? They had been visibly relieved that today would mark the start of an actual relationship for her with the redhead. Now she would have to somehow explain that Chloe and Tom were engaged. Beca was conscious of the fact that she could not fully express the pain that it inflicted. She knew what they would say, and she could not bare to hear it or see it, so she absolved herself in the form of tears for over an hour and a half.

Another hour was spent smoking sequential joints. Then, as night descended, she left the landing, heading for a place that she had only visited a few times but hoped still valued, or at least tolerated, her presence. Her nerves were doing a number on her surely, body still twitching consistently. She abstained from pulling into the driveway until about eleven after she had changed her mind several times and pulled a few u-turns. Ultimately, she parked and shut off her engine. The vehicle parked beside her gave her the assumption that the occupant was present in the home. She could not face her family yet, and this was the only plausible option in her mind. She took deep, deliberate breaths before stepping out of the car and up to the front door. She shakily rang the doorbell then waited patiently, leaning heavily against the adjacent wall. At last, she heard the shuffling of footsteps before the door was pulled open carefully. She looked up, and the frown that creased the occupant's face seemed to sober Beca's thoughts. She mirrored the expression.

"I-I'm sorry," she choked out. "I-I shouldn't have-"

Before she could utter another word, she was jerked into the house, door closed behind her. Her vision was blurry again, thoughts muddled as firm hands cupped her cheeks. Through the gloss, she could distinguish the taller figure's look of concern on their face. It administered a sardonic feeling. Beca wanted to thrash about at that. After everything, she could still look at her like that, like only her well-being mattered. She dropped her head in flagrant shame.

"B, what's wrong?" came the light but sweet voice. "What happened?"

"You-you told me so. You all told me so. You did."

"I-what? How-"

"She's going to marry him."

This statement was more than adequate. She pulled the DJ into her arms without hesitance, cradling her head against her chest. Beca sobbed softly, tears staining the deep purple blouse beneath her cheek.

"I-I'm sorry, Stace," she croaked. "I'm so sorry."

"No, no, it's okay, B," Stacie breathed, holding back her own tears. "It's okay."

"B-but you told me so."

"That doesn't justify gloating, B. You're hurting, and I told you I'd be there."

"Why-why is it like this?"

"We love the ones who hurt us, and we hurt the ones who love us. It's a common nature."

"B-but it isn't right. I-I wish you could be enough. You're so out of my league, and-and you loved me. I-why-"

"Shhh, it's okay, B. We can't explain why it happens. We can't always fully understand how our hearts work, and that's just the way it is."

"I-I'm-"

"No, B, don't. Please don't."

They wound up on the couch, Beca curled into Stacie's side attempting to blink away the tears being shed. She did not want to feel so weak anymore. She did not want to face the truth, but there was no longer a choice. A mistake had been made based on poor judgement and lack of full consideration. She had never contemplated the cons of the situation. For once, she had been an uncharacteristically optimistic version of herself. Or so she thought. Possibly, she was just naive. She had just been denying the reality of the affair. They were all valid points, but at this point, none of them mattered. She would have to overcome this. Someway, somehow, she would have to vanquish this misfortune, be strong in the eyes of her siblings. Tonight, she would mourn. Tomorrow, she would be good as new even if it killed her.

* * *

_Chloe really didn't know what was happening. The scene had developed all too fast for her to fully register or comprehend. She had had a set plan in mind. Once her parents departed, she would sit Tom down and tell him that she no longer wished to be in this relationship. He was not what she wanted nor needed, and she was leaving the apartment as soon as possible. Then all of a sudden, they went from the four of them having a pleasantly tense dinner to a new scene entirely. Now, as she looked around, she found Tom before her on one knee holding up a velvet black box, her father standing with a beaming smile of pride and expectation on his face, and her mother in a fit of tears as she clapped a hand over her mouth. Beneath said hand was a smile. Before she could process all of this, her lips were moving. "Yes". Of course. With an audience present, her father of all people, the answer had fallen subconsciously from her lips. Then it became a celebration where she had to claim being overwhelmed to explain why she was crying in the absence of a smile. How the hell would she dig herself out of this? How the hell could she keep Beca now? She had until Sunday to figure it out._

* * *

Beca could sure put on a show. Aubrey and Jesse had been sure that the DJ had stayed the night at Chloe's for the first time following their reunion. Aubrey was at ease and gave it not a second thought. Jesse? Not so lucky. He felt the stab in his chest in a split instant, possibly an hour or so after his sister had left the airport, and he knew something had gone terribly wrong, but he had not relayed the information to his eldest sibling. Stacie texted him later on that night from her spot beside Beca in her bed, fully clothed mind you, once the shorter woman had finally dozed off and told him that she was fine. They would speak later. Though Stacie did in fact give Jesse a rundown on what had occurred, Beca would not. She came home looking perfectly fine, or as fine as possible. Her face had been cleansed of any sign of tears or a restless night. She was smiling brightly, and the excuse given was very persuading.

"She just has to tell her father is all, but everything looks good," she assured Jesse, Ashley and Aubrey as they sat at the table, and no one questioned her, or had the heart to.

In the nights following, Beca would permit herself no more than an hour to soak in the confines of her bedroom. She then would smoke a joint and let it be, returning to work on her project. Outside of her room, she was happy, overly happy, un-Beca-like happy, and that roused suspicion from her sister. Jesse didn't need suspicion. He knew the truth, but he, as always, defended his twin even when Aubrey would ask him for truth, knowing of their connection. He would give her a curt shake of the head and a noncommittal shrug, and she would have no choice but to believe him.

This facade carried until the Grammy's. When asked about Chloe by her closest circle, she would simply reply that she 'couldn't make it' and wave off any other inquiries. It was then that Aubrey knew the reunion weeks ago had not gone as well as they had initially presumed. Still, they were already on their way to the ceremony, and she was not about to spoil the night for her sister. She locked her concerns away for another day.

It was no surprise that Beca and Rihanna won "best pop performance by a duo". It was also no surprise that Frank and Beca won "best R&B performance" or that her and Jay-Z received the award for best "Rap/Sung collaboration" and "best rap performance". Winning rap album of the year was enticing, but the brunette's speech became smaller and smaller with each win, nothing more to say at that. When "Novacane" won Record of the Year, one of the three most coveted awards, the nerves accelerated in her system. When she won "Song of the Year" with her penmanship of Adele's hit single, she was buzzing with excitement. It all came down to Album of the Year, and Frank gave her a thumbs up. If she won this, she would also tie the record for most awards in one night, being immortalized in a category among Michael Jackson and Santana. Jesse had won two Grammy's that night as well, but he was not focused on that now. He and Stacie flanked the DJ, patiently awaiting the announcement. It was the award she had pined over since the start of her career, that which had evaded her in the beginning. Now, she had a winning chance.

"Beca Mitchell!"

The cheers were deafening. She stood up, hugging her twin brother then Stacie and Aubrey before heading on stage, shaking hands as she went along. She pulled Luke, Cynthia Rose, Jay-Z and Frank up with her as well. She accepted the gramophone from Janelle Monae and Emma Stone, kissing each of their cheeks before stepping up to the microphone. She took deep breaths before looking up.

"I guess I was saving the speech up until now, or I should have," she spoke nervously, and the audience chuckled. "I'm still not good at speeches, but I'd like to thank everyone behind me, my team. They aided me in the production, the recording, the direction of the music itself. I tried to do everything on my own. Thank God they didn't let me because I would not have made it to see this day." Another laugh. "I want to thank my brother and sister again, Jesse and Aubrey, for always believing in me. They moved out here with me fresh out of high school and college on a whim because I had a dream. All we had was each other, and we made it. Stacie for always pushing me to go bigger, better, stronger. She saw the best and worst of me, and she's so much more than a pretty face in Victoria's Secret lingerie." More laughter. "She's been my best friend from the start. Bella Records, Cynthia Rose, they've been the family I lacked for so long, and they never stopped believing in me. They never gave up on me. Jay-Z for bringing us into his realm and making us at home. Frank Ocean. He's been like a big brother to me, and he's been there for both business and personal matters, and he helped so much throughout this. I mean, there was a time when I thought that my fifteen minutes were up, but these people right here held me up until I gained my footing. I want to thank-every fan that bought an album or saw a show. Every artist that jumped on a track or put me on theirs. Everyone that believed in me and never gave up hope even when I myself did. Most of all, I-I want to dedicate this award to my mother. I know she's been watching over me, and I just hope that I made her proud." She looked up towards the roof now. "I love you, Mom. I love you all. Thank you."

* * *

"It's her, isn't it?" Ellie asked softly, pulling the redhead opposite her from her thoughts.

"Huh?" Chloe replied, jerking her head to give her mother an incredulous look.

"Her." The older Beale nodded at the TV where the brunette DJ was closing out her speech.

"What are you-"

"Honey, a mother's intuition is never wrong. I knew long before the proposal that something was eating at you, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Since the proposal, you've been here more often but not with your father around. You looked so lost when Tom proposed. It wasn't like a surreal sort of lost. It was a frightened sort of lost. You wanted to say no, but you couldn't tell us that."

"I-" Chloe was lost for words, eyes dropping to her lap. "He would hate me."

"Honey, your father would never hate you."

"It doesn't matter. Beca _does _hate me, and so does her family. I promised them I would break up with Tom that night, but then he proposed. I swore I wouldn't miss the Grammy's. Now she's back with that model, and-ugh. I messed up everything."

"Still, it's no reason to settle, Chloe. If Tom doesn't make you happy, it isn't meant to be. I'm sorry for pushing you the way we did. You know why you're father is where is now though? He never settled. He pushed himself to be the best in everything he did, but he was only able to do so because he had a passion for it. Our road to happiness was fulfilling, but we lost sight of how abstract happiness is, and we believed you would only be happy if you followed each and every one of our steps. I can see it though, Chloe. I never wanted to believe it, but I do see it. What I can say is that the pride your father feels for you right now will never be worth the resentment that you will for us later."

"Mom, I-" The redhead's eyes were overflowing with tears now. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, honey." Ellie stood quickly, pulling her daughter up and into her arms. After a tight hug, she pulled back slightly so that deep blue met deep blue. "You have nothing to be sorry for. If anything, we should be apologizing for putting so much pressure on you. I only want you to be happy, and I know that your father wants the same. We were just so scared to fail you that we didn't realize our approach did just that. Sweetheart, it's never too late to pursue happiness."

"She-hates me. I tore her apart. She c-came to surprise me at work, and-and _Tom_ told her we were getting married. I didn't-I didn't even tell her. I-"

"Honey, if it is meant to be, it shall be. Your father chased me for three years before I gave him a chance, and to this day, I am hopelessly in love with him. Your father has the biggest heart though it takes him some time to show it, but he loves you more than anything, and he always will. He just wants you to be happy, and you obviously won't be until you make this right."

"Um, how-how did you know it was her?"

Ellie grinned now. "That look. It's always in the eyes. Our eyes. It was how your grandmother knew I had fallen in love with goofy, little Mark Beale from the down the street years after he first told me he liked me. They-they're so much more vivid and-bright. It's filled with longing, and there's a twinkle there. That's how you were looking right now. Plus, you were drooling a bit."

Chloe swatted at her chuckling mother before giggling too, but she soon stopped.

"I-" the younger Beale sputtered. "I-what do I do?"

"You go get her, Chlo. You fight for her."

"I-I don't know how. I've never-done this for me."

"It won't be solved tonight, but I suggest you think about it. It's better to live with a bunch of 'oh wells' then even one 'what if'."

* * *

The club was packed from wall to wall. It was indubitably a celebration. Though Jesse and Beca shared a birthday, Beca always celebrated Jesse's birthday separately to make sure he had the full attention. A week ago, he had won his first two Grammy's, and this week, he was the birthday boy. His own pack of celebrity friends including Emma Stone, Adam Levine, Jennifer Lawrence, the cast of Pretty Little Liars, which he had scored for in the last year and a slew of others were in attendance. The Victoria's Secret angels were there as well, and Jay-Z and his crew had come. Beca had started off the party on the decks, but now she relaxed in the skybox with her brother, and for the first time in a long time, her mind was free of worry and heartache. The redhead was not forgotten of course. Every redhead she laid eyes on brought her back to the visions of her beloved, but she just took another shot each time. It was working so far, so she couldn't complain.

Jesse was happy, and that made Beca happy. Seeing his youthful grin light up the entire club was worth the world to his twin sister. The transfer of positive energy was warmly welcomed, and the old Beca resurfaced if only for the night. She even called in a favor, and Ashley agreed to let the man have a lap dance on the skybox couch. There was of course a time limit, but Jesse was okay with it. He was happy regardless. His year was starting off phenomenally, and his sisters were proud. Maybe he would be the one to get Beca through a rough year this time. It was promising.

"I can't believe they have fuckin' Ben Affleck as Batman though!" Benji huffed for the fifth time.

"Right!" Rihanna concurred. "Worst idea ever."

"They really screwed up that one," Jesse nodded.

"At least it wasn't an actual 'Dark Knight' film though," Beca injected. "I would've shot up Hollywood, you know. That would be an unforgivable sin!"

"What would be?" Stacie giggled as she settled back down between Aubrey and Beca, handing the DJ another drink.

"Putting Ben Affleck in a Dark Knight film."

"Oh, definitely. Ew."

"So when are we gonna see you on the big screen, Little B?" Jay-Z asked.

She snorted a laugh. "Don't hold your breath, Jay."

"Aw, come on. That would be a big-money film. With Little J here scoring it, it would be a hit."

"We'll see about that. "

"Think about it. Plus, you have Victoria's Secret angels at your disposal."

"Disposal?" Stacie quirked a playful eyebrow at the man.

"Well, you have the great pleasure to know them so closely and be able to ask them to assist you," he amended with a smile, and Stacie nodded in content.

"Much better."

"Okay, everyone," a waitress now called into the room. "We have a special surprise for the birthday boy!"

As she said that, three other waitresses walked in donning party hats and carrying a very large multi-tiered cake. It had vanilla frosting splattered with confetti, and on the top sat an edible clapboard like that in the movies. Each tier was also lined with elaborately detailed film around the sides, and Jesse nearly fainted at the sight. It was perfect in his eyes.

"Wow," he gasped. "How-"

"It turns out that Jessica there can bake and decorate cakes," Beca gestured to the small blonde sitting near Luke, CR and Denise, causing her cheeks to flush.

"Wow, really! Jessica, thank you so so much. This is perfect. I almost don't wanna eat it."

"Well, too bad!" Frank immediately shot back. "I only came for the cake!"

Everyone chuckled as Jesse hugged Jessica before beginning to snap pictures of the masterpiece. The guy was serious. It took twenty minutes after they sang "Happy Birthday" for him to allow the waitresses to cut it. When they did, Beca swore that she heard a whimper and a pang in her chest. She threw her arm around her brother and ruffled his hair.

"I'll be right back," she whispered in his ear.

"Where are you going?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"To get a smoke from the car. I'm all dry up here."

He nodded, and she stood, rushing off down the stairs and out the back entrance. She was smiling widely, glad that Jesse was enjoying himself that night. That smile could brighten anyone's mood. He had this goofy sort of charm to him, and Beca could never stay mad at her brother despite their constant bickering when they were younger. Ever since middle school however, Jesse had never set out to annoy his sister but only to be just like her, to make her proud of him. That was all he had ever been concerned with, and though Beca didn't vocalize it much, she had never been more proud of anyone than she was of him. To see him follow his own dream and make his own way as well as get his degree was still amazing to her. Though she would never say it aloud, she looked up to _him _in more ways than one.

She pushed the back entrance open and headed to her car. Opening the passenger door, she crawled in and grabbed two joints from the middle console. As she stood back up, she heard a very distinct sound behind her that drove her hand to fall to her waist where her pistol was tucked. It was the sound of a gun being cocked, and it was right beside her ear.


	15. Hanging by a Thread

**_A/N: I would first like to wish that I could reply to guests and I cant and its frustrating lol anyway. So I dont see how it got out of hand. She thought about her for two years. There is no way that she can just drop it either. It's like having multiple overdoses on a drug. But if you dont find help or refuse help (which Beca continually does) and you continue to fall into darkness, you're gonna run back to that drug because you feel like its the only thing to soothe you. The whole thing is a metaphor to drugs. My uncle overdosed four times on his drug of choice before realizing the issue. Even after he sought help, he allowed it to take his life. If so, drugs as a whole are always out of hand, so in my opinion, this is going exactly the way it should. Chloe is Beca's drug. Turning away is not easy. The fact that said drug can actually fight back? Yeah, its going to get her. Therefore..._**

* * *

_Don't leave me hanging, I'm holding on by a thread_

_Friends screwing with me, got screws loose in my head_

_The morning that you left, I woke up half dead_

_Nothing a little make-up can't fix, I'm transfixed_

_She's been dropping hints since the sun started descent_

_She gave up on extent so I gave her up for lent_

_The facade made a dent but it'll only last for so long_

_My position is to never think that nothing else can go wrong_

_She just wants to know what goes on but I'm speechless_

_Holding dirt above my head like let's see if I can reach this_

_She's dressed half decent, I wish she wasn't dressed at all_

_Then she gets intense when I forget to answer her calls_

_These relations are off the wall, you wanna hear the punchline?_

_I wouldn't trade it for the world, she's my never-question girl_

* * *

"Hey, Babygirl," Warren's cold tone resonated through the alley. "Your old man here."

Beca slowly turned around, a smirk in place. This caught her father slightly off guard.

"You know, you're a hard man to get ahold of," she informed him in a matter-of-fact tone, leaning back against the car and lighting up. "I've been trying since that stunt at the studio."

He grinned now, slightly lowering the weapon. "Is that so? What did you need?"

"The question is, what do _you_ need?"

"Hmm." He took to pondering the question externally, but Beca knew that he was internally taken aback by the question, causing her smirk to deepen.

"What is it, Warren? Calculating it all, we made-" Her eyes rolled upwards, a thoughtful look upon her. "About six hundred thousand on your stash. I'd assume that, like any good business man, you would want interest because you know, even though you abandoned your kids to take care of themselves like the worthless father you are, the money always came first. Therefore, blood does not mean 'discount'. With that, I'd say ten percent is a reasonable interest rate, so I can go ahead and be the bigger person here, set you up with $660,000. Then you can be on your way. Am I right?"

Now it was his turn to chuckle. His hand with the gun dropped as he doubled over with laughter, a roar of a sound coming from him. Beca raised an eyebrow but held her ground, taking a drag of the joint in her hands. At last, he composed himself, straightening his stance and meeting her gaze.

"Word on the street is that this 'Novacane' you wrote about is not just a fantasy drug from a dentist," he nonchalantly stated. "What can you tell me about that?"

"To me, it is, Warren," she replied in the same even tone, no hesitation whatsoever. "I met a dentist. She told me about the stuff. I had my wisdom teeth extracted, and I thought 'hmm, what if they sold the stuff'? It's a dream. Sorry to disappoint you."

"I think you're lying."

"Well, I mean, they say there's some synthetic shit going by the same name on the streets, but it's high-price for a very little quantity, so-"

He scoffed, the gun beginning another ascent in her direction. "Like you couldn't afford it. I'm your old man, Becs, but I'm not stupid! The stuff's real, and I want my stash repaid the same way it was taken, but I want it laced with that stuff."

She snorted a laugh now. "That's like three times the amount I'm maxing out on. You're fuckin' off your rocker, dude."

"I think not." He raised the gun fully now once more, aiming at her chest.

"I'm trying to be the better person here, but you know what? Fuck it, Warren, and fuck you. You wanna kill me? Go ahead. I'm sure killing your daughter has some real merit back in the cage."

His eyes darkened now, teeth bared. "I won't go back to a fuckin' cage."

"I guarantee you that if you take me out, you won't make it out of this alley."

"Oh, really? Wanna wager on it?"

"Sure, how much?"

"Your life."

The shot rang out just as Jesse walked out of the entrance in search of his sister. The passenger window of the Charger shattered as Beca was blown back into the vehicle before slumping to the floor. Warren whirled around to flee, but Jesse instantly sobered. He withdrew the gun from the back of his belt, aiming it at his father. Warren froze when he caught sight of Jesse. Aubrey and Luke, who had been on the terrace with Stacie and Frank for air, had heard the gunshot and were already calling security and the police as they bounded downstairs.

"Hey, son," Warren chuckled softly.

"Don't fuckin' move," Jesse warned. "I'll see you right back off to that cage, you prick."

"Come on, Son. I-"

"She's your fuckin' daughter, Warren, and you chose material shit over her! You can rot in hell!"

"She should've just paid up. Greed will get you killed."

It was at that moment that the door burst open to reveal a flustered Aubrey, Luke and Donald trying to restrain her to no avail. Jesse turned as Aubrey called his name, and Warren then utilized the distraction to aim his gun at his son. Jesse looked back just in time to take a shot before his father could. Warren crumpled to the ground instantly. Jesse was in shock, immediately dropping the gun to his side and stepping cautiously over to the man. As he gazed down upon the limp body, anger rose within him.

"Yeah," he sneered. "Greed _will_ get you killed."

As more of their friends appeared in the alley, Jesse rushed to his sister's side. He pulled Beca's gun out of her belt and tossed it over to their security guards before pulling her into his arms. Aubrey was beside them in moments, tears streaming down her face.

"Is-is she breathing?" she choked out, scared of the answer but anxious to know.

"Barely," he replied hoarsely, fingers at her pulse point. "I-it's faint."

It seemed like ages before paramedics and police pulled into the alley. The siblings were instantly loaded into an ambulance headed for the hospital as medics tended to Beca, who had suffered a through-and-through shot to her left side. One medic said that it had been a concussion from her impact with her Charger to knock her unconscious, and blood loss was going to be the deciding factor at this point. Jesse had an arm around Aubrey, trying to hold them both together at the moment. Cynthia Rose, Lily and Luke were dealing with the police back at the club, but once they were done, they would meet them down there. Frank was already en route with Donald, Rihanna and Jay-Z as well as Ashley, Denise, Stacie and Jessica. The anxiety that was now overtaking the group was immense, a gut-wrenching feeling that could make anyone nauseous. Aubrey had been choking down vomit since she had heard the gunshot go off, fear gripping her insides and twisting them painfully. Jesse's grip on her shoulder was bruising, but neither seemed to notice, their full attention on the small brunette laying in the gurney before them beneath an oxygen mask.

When they reached the hospital, everything seemed to stop or slow down. Beca was rushed away, and Jesse and Aubrey were steered into the dreaded waiting room. As their friends arrived, the silence became dense. It was like the water pressure sixteen hundred feet beneath the ocean surface, bone-crushing. The air was thin as if they had climbed in elevation. No one spoke at first. All was quiet, everyone in their own thoughts. It was two in the morning. The waiting room was only occupied by them. The tears fell silently, no one willing to face the realization that they may have seen the DJ alive for the last time that night. It was all too much. What scared Aubrey and Stacie most was to see grown men, as powerful and mighty as Jay-Z and Frank, cry shamelessly in their chairs. Jesse was in a state of shock, eyes bloodshot and glazed over though no tears would fall. Ashley rubbed his back, attempting to control her own tears. He had a look of resignation about him, hands idle in his lap. Stacie held Aubrey close, whispering motivational words in her ear as she sobbed quietly into the brunette's chest. Rihanna rubbed Frank's shoulders, tears pouring from her eyes without a sound. The suspense of the atmosphere was surreal, tense in all senses of the word. Muscles were tightened, jaws clenched and fingers twitching. Killing his father had no effect on Jesse. He had been fueled by revenge, vision tinted red, and he now could not deny that he was deeply glad the man was dead. He was not worried. Donald's arms dealer had put licenses for the firearms in place, so they were clean. No, it had just been much too easy pulling that trigger. They had learned back in high school how to shoot, sophomore year when they became serious about selling the Mitchell supply and running Barden's trade. However, he wished that he had not had to pull the trigger because that would mean that Beca would not be where she was now, dying on a table somewhere in the hospital.

The hours ticked by, news crews being deterred from entering the hospital by Cynthia Rose's security team from the club as well as the studio. Multiple brawls broke out between guards and overly driven reporters, but all in all, the family had yet to be approached. Still, the news was covering the story closely, already catching wind of Jesse's encounter with Warren. Everyone in LA as well as the rest of America was aware that Beca had been shot and was now in critical condition, everyone including a certain redhead that had fainted in her mother's home at the sight. This could not be happening. No one wanted to believe it. Everyone was waiting for the punchline, for the joke to end and for Beca to come walking down the hallway with her signature smirk in place. They continued blinking periodically, hoping to awaken from the horrible nightmare they had been cast into. It never happened. Each time they blinked, they opened their eyes to the sight of the sterile environment and the overwrought waiting room. With no news coming in, nerves were edging towards breaking only time anyone spoke was when the police came to ask questions, and it had taken a moment before Jesse could speak. He handed over his weapon without error, and once they had cleared it, he agreed it could be taken for evidence. At last, as the sun closed in on its highest point in the sky, nearly twelve hours later, a doctor approached the huddled up family. Aubrey immediately stood, Jesse still unable to move from his position.

"Ms. Posen?" he asked, and the blonde nodded vehemently. "I'm Dr. Mark Beale, a neurosurgeon here. The surgery with Dr. Edwards to repair the damage to Ms. Mitchell's chest cavity was successful. She suffered hemorrhaging in her head, and that was our biggest obstacle which is why they called me in. My team and I were able to repair this as well. She is going to be okay, but the extent of the concussion and blunt force trauma cannot be determined until she is awake. The bullet did not hit any major organs, so there was no internal bleeding. They are clearing her to be moved into recovery, and in about another hour or so, you'll be able to see her."

A breath seemed to be pumped into the entire room, sighs of relief echoing around the lobby. Jesse had Aubrey in his arms in seconds after Ashley repeated the information into his ear. Hugs and kisses were shared among the family, tears of joy streaming down every face.

"Thank you," Aubrey breathed to the doctor. "Thank you so much."

"No problem," the man smiled. "We will be out shortly."

The wait to see Beca was still a drawn out standby, but they were willing to do so as long as she was okay. Once they were given the green light, Aubrey and Jesse assured everyone they would go last. No one stayed too long, but they did decorate her room with flowers, cards and her iPod that Stacie had fetched among other things. At last, Jesse and Aubrey made their way in as the group trickled out of the hospital for food and some rest, assuring the siblings they would be back later on. Cynthia Rose would also be giving a statement to reporters as well just to calm them before Beca's release. Beca lay on her bed sleeping soundly, the gauze that covered the left side of her chest visible above the collar of her gown. There was gauze wrapped around her head now, an oxygen mask over her face. Aubrey took her left hand, Jesse taking her right.

"I've been feeling a pain in the left side of my chest all night," Jesse hissed jokingly. "You scared the fuck out of us, B, but-I-I took care of it. Don't worry."

Aubrey gave him a look with a mixture of sympathy and pride. He smiled weakly at her.

"I don't know what happened, B," Aubrey whispered, "but I'd like to believe that this was inevitable, and I'm glad that it's over. You're going to be okay now."

"I'm so over weed," Jesse sighed.

Aubrey laughed breathily. "You should be." She looked back down at her sister. "Well, get some rest, B. We'll be here when you wake up."

* * *

Chloe awoke in bed in her mother's guest room, head pounding. She tried to recall what had happened in vain. Sitting up slowly, she took in her surroundings before calling out for her mother. Ellie scurried into the room quickly with Aspirin and a glass of water. Chloe gratefully took it, chugging down the pills and water in seconds. Then she looked up at her mother, and the grim look in those deep blue eyes caused the revelation of the night prior to barrel back into her mind instantly. Her heart cracked, and moments later, she was in a fit of sobs. Ellie pulled her daughter into her arms, rubbing soothing circles on her back. They stayed like that for a long while until Chloe's sobs turned to nothing more than sniffles.

"Is-has-has there been any news?" Chloe rasped.

"Yeah," Ellie breathed. "I haven't turned the news back on, but Tom called about her. The surgery went well to repair a hemorrhage in her head, and she's in recovery now. If all continues to go well, she's going to be just fine, but they don't know the extent of the head injury until she wakes up."

"Head injury? So-Dad..."

"Yes, honey, Tom and Dad performed the surgeries. He wasn't supposed to say anything, but he figured you would want to know."

"I-he-ugh, I-"

"Chloe, regardless of any of that, you can't drag him along. You may be given a second chance to make things right. Don't throw it away."

"I-she-I love her, Mom, so much."

Ellie smiled warmly. "Then I'll get the shower on. There's coffee in the kitchen. Let's get a move on."

* * *

Aubrey sipped her coffee slowly from the corner of the hospital room while Dr. Edwards took Beca's vitals. He was a young man, no older than her, and he had a bit of a holier-than-thou attitude in the hospital. He touched nurses all too much, spoke in a condescending tone more often than not, and Aubrey pegged him for a fraternity tool in his college days. Jesse had gone out to fetch them lunch before his urge to punch the guy overpowered him, and Beca had yet to wake up again. She had come to an hour before, the heart monitor picking up as she awakened. She had been severely disoriented and confused, but she was able to answer a few basic questions including what her name was and who Aubrey and Jesse were, so she had given everyone some relief. The doctors had sedated her once more however so as to let her mind rest before everything came whooshing back to her and did more harm than good.

The blonde waited patiently though she was beyond exhausted. She was pretty sure that her mind kept shutting off here and there as she found herself skipping lapses of time. Her eyes had begun to flutter shut once more when she heard the door open. She looked up, but the sight was not one she had expected. There stood Chloe, eyes as red as Aubrey's with a glazed look and flushed cheeks the hue of her hair. Dr. Edwards looked up, and the scene that began to unfold had Aubrey gaping as the true identity of the man was revealed.

"Hey, Chlo," he whispered excitedly. "She's not awake yet, but-"

"Oh, that's okay," Chloe instantly assured him in a hurried tone. "I-need to talk to you first, Tom."

She glanced at Aubrey for a second, and the blonde took the cue once she had registered the interaction and processed the name and face. She stood now, and something tugged at her heart. She was assuming it was a good tug, but she wouldn't hold her breath. Still, she patted Chloe's shoulder with an encouraging smile and walked out of the room.

"What's up?" Tom asked now once their audience had vacated the room.

Chloe fiddled with the diamond ring on her finger for a moment, her eyes downcast as she took deep, calming breaths. Tom's demeanor changed instantly, shoulders tensing and eyes flashing with concern and-fear? Chloe at last slowly slid the ring off of her finger. She reached out, grabbing his limp wrist and pulling it up, dropping the piece of jewelry into his palm. She didn't notice the flutter of eyelids to her right or the slight movement from the hospital bed. She was solely focused on the task at hand.

"What is this, Chloe?" he asked, irritation lacing his tone.

"I-I-" She took one more sharp inhale before looking up and meeting his expectant gaze. She took one glance at Beca and had all of the courage needed to complete her objective. "Tom, I can't marry you. I don't love you. All I've ever been is a prize for you to show off, a way to my father's heart. All you've been is the same, for my dad's sake, a way to appease him, and I can't do this anymore. I can't settle. It isn't fair to anyone. You don't care about me, and I won't be a trophy on your shelf forever."

"Chloe, what are you-"

"I-no, I can't."

He glanced over at Beca now. "It's her, isn't it?"

"It's always been her," Chloe blurted out before thinking but remained calm. "She loves me. She really loves me, and she's treated me like a queen since day one, and I treated her like shit because I was afraid of my father. I can't be afraid anymore. I can't lose her again. She may not even forgive me for all of this, but I'm going to take that chance because I don't want to settle."

He chuckled now though the agitation remained. "You have to be fuckin' kidding me, Chloe. She-she's a DJ. I'm a catch. You think she'll settle for you when she's fucking models and superstars? You think you'll be the only one?"

"I've been the only one for awhile. She should've been too."

His laugh was full on now, leaving him breathless. "You are pathetic."

Before Chloe could reply, the door opened once more to reveal the final objective. Dr. Mark Beale, a tall, looming figure with a thick copper goatee and a bald head stepped into the room.

"Hey, Chlo-Bear," he greeted with a surprised smile. "What are you doing here? Tom, can you get Ms. McNeil's vitals now before Cara gives her her meds?"

Tom was hesitant to leave, not ready to have his conversation with Chloe finalized and really wanting to hear the conversation between father and daughter. However, he adhered to Dr. Beale's request and left the room. Chloe's muscles had tensed, fear trickling into her stomach as she became light-headed. She began swaying slightly, and Dr. Beale caught her before she could fall backwards, sitting her into a chair.

"Chloe, what's going on?" he asked, genuine worry in his voice. "What happened? Are you okay? What-" He glanced down and immediately noticed the absence of her engagement ring. "Chloe, did you and Tom fight? Where's your ring? I-"

"I wanna be a teacher, Daddy," she blurted out, eyes bulging at the realization as her father's face contorted into confusion.

"Wha-Chloe? What are you talking about?"

She had already started, and she had to quickly charge on before all of her courage went out the window. "All of my life, Daddy, I've been trying to be the most perfect daughter. I've been trying to make sure that you and Mom were proud of me, so I went to Berkeley and became a dentist and went out with Tom and _stayed _with Tom. I love you so much, and I just didn't-want to let you down, but-I don't love Tom. I don't love being a dentist. I didn't want to leave LA to go to Berkeley, but I _did_ want to make my daddy proud, so I settled. I did, but I can't anymore. Tom, he-he's-I get treated like nothing more than a trophy. I don't even feel human anymore. Just-a prized show dog or something. He isn't sweet. He doesn't hold doors open or send me flowers or kiss me good night or ask me how my day was or any of that. He doesn't hold me when I'm sick. He-just leaves. I-I love you so much, Daddy, but-I can't live the life you want me to anymore. I-I am in love with that woman right there." She gestured vaguely towards where Beca lay, eyes still shut. "I love her. I am in love with her, hopelessly in love with her, and the way you chased mom, she's been chasing me because she loves me too. She treats me like I'm the only woman in the world, and I feel alive when I'm with her. She holds open doors and holds me when I sleep and tells me that she loves me. I know that she's not what you had in mind for me, but she's all that's in my mind. I feel-real, and that's all I wanna feel, Daddy. I'm happy with her, and I want to feel happy forever. I don't wanna live a double life or lie to you or hide who I am anymore. I just-I wanna be me, and I want you to love me anyway, and if you don't, I understand. I do, but I can't do this anymore. I-I'm sorry."

Dr. Beale was stunned. He didn't speak at first as Chloe's face dropped into her hands and she began to cry. He looked over at his patient as if sizing her up a moment, eyes narrowed before his eyebrow shot up. He then looked back to his daughter, and he gently rested a hand on her shoulder. This soon became a full embrace as he pulled her into his arms, kissing the top of her head delicately.

"Chlo-Bear," he breathed. "You'll always be my baby. No matter what you choose. I'm so sorry if I ever made you feel otherwise, but I will always love you. I want you to be happy. I just figured that the path to my happiness was the only path, and I was wrong. If she makes you happy. If she really loves you then she is welcome in my home. I mean, I'll still have the same father-daughter's date talk, but you know." Chloe managed a breathy chuckle at that. "Sweetheart, there is nothing in this world you can do to make me stop loving you. I am so sorry I made you feel as if you couldn't talk to me. You can always come to me though."

Chloe only nodded, now throwing her arms around the bear of a man beside her. He chuckled lightly as she nuzzled her face into his neck, rubbing circles on her back softly. He planted a kiss on her temple before detangling them.

"Okay, honey," he sighed. "I have to get back to work, and I'll be in to check on-"

"Beca," Chloe filled in eagerly.

"Beca." He smiled warmly. "Then we can discuss dinner when she's freed."

Chloe giggled. "Thank you, Daddy."

"No problem, kiddo, and don't worry about Tom. I'll take care of it."

She nodded as he walked off back out of the room. Chloe then stood, cautiously stepping towards the sleeping beauty that had been so quiet during that entire session. Actually, it was a bit too quiet. She had not stirred or moved or anything. Usually, there would be at least a shift of some sort. Mark had discussed neurosurgery with his daughter enough for her to know that the body would usually experience twitches or spasms once the brain had been stabilized while in the state of unconsciousness. She smirked as she took Beca's hand in hers.

"So am I forgiven?" the redhead asked softly, sliding onto the bed beside the brunette.

Stormy blue eyes fluttered open, bulging as they took in the redhead.

"Uh, where am I?" she asked shakily. "Who-who are you?"

Chloe's eyes widened instantly, stomach churning as her heart plummeted into it. Then Beca's smirk appeared on her face before the most joyous sound of the DJ's laugh filled the room. Chloe swatted her arm, effectively ceasing the laughter and causing Beca to hiss in pain.

"Ouch, woman, I just got shot in that arm!" she whined.

"Don't do that!" Chloe snapped. "That seriously happens more often than not."

"Well, you slapped the memory back into me."

Chloe rolled her eyes. "Still the same Beca. No brain injury could fix that."

"Fix it? You fell in love with that Beca, so why are you complaining?"

"So you heard all of it then?"

"Don't change the subject!" Chloe cocked back a hand, poised to strike again. "Okay, okay! Yes, I heard everything, and-well, I'm proud of you I suppose. Although, I was really close to getting up a choking that douchebag with my IV cord."

Chloe dropped her hand now with a soft smile that quickly fell away. "Beca, I'm so sorry about everything. I-Tom proposed during dinner, and-I was caught off guard. I had no idea what to do. I-I just-"

"Hey," Beca cut her off. "Let's-let's just start over, okay? Well, not completely over because I don't wanna go through wooing you again." Chloe slapped her thigh as she chortled. "I mean, let's-it's in the past now, okay? I mean, we have a lot to work out. It's gonna be hard work. We have to talk over a bunch of stuff, so that we know this is what we want and get to know each other for real. It isn't going to be easy, and it isn't a sure thing, but-I have to try because I'm in love with you."

A smile broke on the brunette's face as Chloe vigorously nodded her agreement.

"I love you, Beca."

"I love you too, Chloe."

"Seriously though, how's your head?"

"It's throbbing a bit, and-I feel a bit dizzy. Like, my vision's kind of blurry, but I'm okay. I woke up earlier, and I saw Jesse and Bree, but they put me back to sleep."

"That's good. That's really good." The DJ sighed now, her head lolling back. "Are you okay? What is it?"

"I-I just...Damn."

"What? Becs."

"I'm-so not ready for this talk with your dad."

Chloe giggled softly, running her fingers through chocolate tresses. "You'll be fine, champ. You survived a gunshot. I'm pretty sure you can handle interrogation from a doctor."

"Don't hold your breath. Your dad is much scarier to me than my dad."

Chloe sobered now. "So, he really shot you?"

"Yeah, I-I just-we were talking. I offered him the amount that we made on his supply plus another $60,000, but he wanted more. Then-the shot just went off. Is-did they catch him?"

Chloe breathed deeply now, the grip on Beca's hand tightening. "Beca, he-well, Jesse shot him. He's dead."

Beca looked up now, much too quickly and made herself dizzy, but she didn't pay that any mind. "What?"

"Yeah, Jesse shot him after he shot you. It was on the news and all. I don't know the whole of it, but-yeah. He's-gone."  
She shook her head softly. "Jesse. He-is he okay? I-I couldn't even tell earlier. I just-"

"He was out when I arrived. I only saw Aubrey, but-we didn't talk. She left so that I could talk to Tom, but I'm sure he's fine."

"I-I just-the dreams, you know. If something had happened to him, I-"

"Nothing happened to him, Becs. He's okay. He's alive and unharmed. It's over now."

As if on cue, the door to the room opened to reveal Beca's twin brother. When he saw the two women on the bed, he flashed his enormous boyish grin. Beca chuckled at the sight, and she had never been more glad to see him. He strode over to her side opposite Chloe.

"How's it going, 50 Cent from 'Get Rich or Die Trying'?" he asked.

"You know, you just have to say 50 Cent," she deadpanned. "You don't have to reference a specific album or movie."

His grin fell away instantly, eyes wide. "Damn, getting shot changed you."

She barked a laugh, swatting his arm softly. "Shut up, you goof."

"So I see all has worked out here. Just a guess, Chloe. Is Dr. Edwards your ex?"

"Yeah," Chloe drawled. "Why?"

"Oh, he just- he doesn't look all too happy out there, and I'm going to take a shot in the dark and say that Dr. Beale is your dad for obvious reasons. Anyway, he had to reprimand the guy for throwing a temper tantrum in the nurse station. Comical by the way, but still."

The two women chuckled as Jesse smiled. "He really threw a tantrum?" Jesse nodded. "Wow."

The twins then looked at each other with knowing smirks before saying in unison, "Tool!"

The laughing lasted a moment before Beca cooled down and looked up at her grinning brother. Her eyes were somber now, and he took the same stance, waiting patiently for the inevitable inquiry.

"What happened out there, J?" she asked, genuine curiosity in her cloudy eyes.

He huffed. "Well, uh, I went out there to check on you because you had been gone awhile. I figured you stayed out there to smoke, but then I remembered what happened last time, so I went down. As soon as I walked outside, I heard the shot fired. I-well, I aimed my gun at him, so he wouldn't leave. Aubrey and Luke were out on the terrace, and they heard the shot. They came down before I could call the police, and they-they startled me. When the door opened, I looked over to warn them, but-Dad aimed the gun at me, and-I-I just-I shot. I didn't know what else to do, so I shot. I just-I didn't know what else to do, B."

Beca immediately sat up further, releasing Chloe's hand gently in order to pull Jesse into a hug. He melted into her embrace, restraining the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes, a lump in his throat. She was doing the same as he gingerly wrapped her up in his arms. They stayed that way for a long time, unaware when Aubrey stepped through the door. Chloe stood up beside the bed, stepping away slightly. Aubrey stopped her before she could leave the room and pulled the redhead into the warmest hug Aubrey had ever given anyone not of blood relation. Chloe allowed herself to indulge in the embrace, her arms around the blonde's back.

"Thank you," Aubrey whispered in a strained voice as if it pained her to say the words.

"No," Chloe returned. "Thank you."

"I love you, J," Beca whispered to her brother.

"I love you too, B," he returned hoarsely. "Just-don't scare me like that anymore."

"I won't, Dude, but no more shooting people unless we're on the console."

He chuckled. "Deal just as long as no one takes shots at you again. You know, the hip-hop lifestyle and all."

She chortled, patting his shoulder. "Okay, that's a deal, but-maybe we should-"

"Get vests?"

"Yeah!"

"I'm game!"

Aubrey rolled her eyes with a huff. "And...she's back."


	16. The Company You Keep

**_A/N: So there's probably one more chapter after this. Im just going to warn everyone now. I appreciate those who have enjoyed my stories. Who love them and tell me so. However, if this is too much for you, I can assure you that it will continue to get more and more bizarre. I'm a very unorthodox writer. This probably wont be the worst. I try to make it as real as possible. I do it for a living. its sort of second nature if you will. This will be the last time I explain myself however. I started writing this stuff to get AWAY from the work aspect of it. For a release because I write four scripts a week, fifteen in a month, and its a lot of work. I started losing my passion for it, but then I did this, and it's coming back but I never did it to be judged or misinterpreted. Therefore, fair warning. If I do decide to continue writing fan fics, they probably won't be much more fun and sunny than this because that's not my thing. Thank you._**

* * *

_"You're going, and that's final," Anna's raspy voice asserted from her bed, looking up at her three children. "You have a dream. Jesse was accepted to UCLA, and he isn't going alone. It'll work out for all of you, and you'll all be together."_

_"I can take the year off, Ma," Jesse assured her for the nth time. "We can't leave you right-"_

_"Nonsense. You're not taking a year off of school, Jesse Joseph."_

_"Mom, just come with us," Aubrey suggested in a firm yet pleading tone._

_"I can't just up and leave, Bree. You know that."_

_"We can't just leave you here. We can't. You're all we have apart from each other, and you're our mother. We love you, so please." It was evident all three were holding back tears._

_Anna pondered it a moment. "How about this? You go up there, get settled in. The treatment is going well for me here right now, and we're making real progress. You start up there, Jesse begins school, and next spring, I'll have everything handled down here to move with you."_

_"You mean it? Really? Mom, I can help with all the legalities, and-"_

_"No, Bree, I can do it. You have to go with the twins. Danny and Lena will help me, and I promise by next spring, we'll all be together again."  
Aubrey observed her mother awhile before sighing heavily. "Okay, Mom, okay."_

_As Jesse and Aubrey filed out, Beca turning to follow, Anna reached up and grabbed her middle child's hand softly. Beca looked back at her. Steel blue met spring green, and Anna offered a small smile. Beca returned it, wrapping her fingers around her mother's. She had been quiet throughout the debate, unsure of what to say. When she had pitched the idea to Aubrey about moving to LA, she had just assumed that her mother was going with them. She never expected her mother to be so relentless in getting them to go without her. She wanted Beca to follow her dreams, follow the music and make something of the passion she had harvested over the years. It was her only desire for her children, to be content, to be happy. Beca knew that they could trust Danny and his wife Lena, their mother's best friends and next door neighbors, to look after the ill woman, but Beca felt as if she was abandoning responsibility, as if she was turning out like her father._

_"You're going to be amazing," she whispered up to the DJ._

_"I-I don't wanna leave you," Beca choked, biting back a sob as she kneeled beside her mother. "I-I-what if something happens?"_

_"Nothing's going to happen, Baby. I'm tough as nails. I'll be just fine."_

_"I-I can't just abandon you. I-I'm not-not him. I'm not Dad."  
Anna's eyes softened, a single tear escaping them. "Baby, you are nothing like him. You are so much more than that, and you are an amazing daughter, but all I want for you is a stable foundation in case of anything down the road whether it's this cancer or something entirely different. I raised you. Now it's time to grow on your own."_

_Beca nodded in understanding. "I'm gonna make you proud, Mama."_

_Anna smiled warmly. "I know you will, my little cricket. You were always singing, and then, when I would come around the corner, you would get really quiet, but I always listened. That's what you have to do. You have to listen. Listen to the music no one else pays attention to. Listen to your heart and follow it wholly. Don't be afraid to love, Baby. Don't be afraid to listen to your heart because I promise you that when nothing else makes any logical sense, it will always have the correct answer. Don't ever give up on your dreams. It may not happen right away, but it will happen if you want it to."_

_Beca nodded softly as Anna rose up to kiss her forehead. "I love you, Mom."_

_"I love you too, Bug. Don't ever forget that. If all else fails, don't do it for anyone but yourself."_

* * *

"Do you need help?" Aubrey asked once more, nervously biting her lip as Beca stood.

"It's a arm sling not paralysis, Bree, I can wipe myself," Beca smirked, heading to the bathroom.

"I just-I-"

"Bree, I'm fine."

"She did drive home," Chloe muttered, and Aubrey gave her an incredulous look to which Chloe smiled sheepishly. "Kidding. Totally kidding."

The brunette disappeared down the hall, and the others in the room chuckled as Aubrey huffed her resignation, slumping back into the DJ's couch.

"Don't worry, Bree," Chloe chirped. "My dad said that the head injury was minimal. The bleeding put some pressure on her brain, but it didn't damage anything that would cause long-term damage. She'll be just fine."

"Save your breath, Chlo," Jesse chuckled. "She's going to worry with or without valid grounds, even from a neurosurgeon. It's what she does best."

"Yeah, that's why you're still alive," Aubrey said in a sickly sweet tone though she was glaring at him.

"Chill out, Bree," Stacie hissed into Aubrey's ear, throwing an arm around her. "B is fine."

"It-it's only been two weeks since she was released," Aubrey whined. "She's still-"

"Fine!" Beca yelled as she came back down the hallway before appearing in the living room once more. "I'm still fine."

"Ugh, you're gonna be the death of me."

"Lucky you." The DJ smirked.

Beca had been out of the hospital for two weeks now, and aside from the prescribed medication for headaches and the steps to tending to her wounds, she was clear from all treatments. She would have the customary checkup as well, but the doctors weren't worried about it. Of course, Mark Beale kept up with her after Beca had made it through dinner with the Beales without a hitch. Actually, the more eloquent description was that she made an astonishingly amazing first impression. Chloe found that Beca Mitchell was anything but just some star that had no respect for knowledge or the more philosophical aspects of life. She was well-educated, and she could hold a very jarring conversation, even with a neurosurgeon. She was able to expand the man's mind beyond logical thinking and at times, had him lost for words. On the other hand, she had been able to quickly burrow into Ellie's heart with her sweet disposition that only came out to play for Chloe and her constant concern for the redhead despite the fact it was Beca who was in a sling with a healing head injury.

There had been a million different possibilities for the aftermath of Beca's concussion and hemorrhage. Seizures, memory loss, loss of motor skills and minor functions and paralysis among other things. Nevertheless, Beca had come out fully functional and one hundred percent aside from the purely physical aspect. Someone had in fact been watching over the small brunette, and she was grateful. The doctors had said the bullet had been derailed by her Bella chain. Had the pendant not been there, there was a good chance her artery or her actual heart would have been struck. That was enough of a wake-up call for Beca. Since leaving the hospital, two major things had changed for the best. She had left with a newfound faith in relations with Chloe, and she had also left without the urge to smoke weed. Both twins had been clean since her discharge, and their family could not be happier.

That evening, Chloe, Aubrey, Jesse, Stacie, Cynthia Rose and Luke found themselves gathered in Studio B of Bella Records. Beca had just pulled on her new Bella chain and stepped into the booth. She had no paper in hand, the lyrics needing to be recorded tonight thoroughly memorized. She had been putting off the occasion for a long time, but tonight, she was ready. After tweaking it several more times since her stay in the hospital, she knew it was perfect. She pulled on her headphones tentatively, stepping in front of the suspended microphone with deep breaths. She squeezed her eyes shut, focusing her energy on the task at hand. When she opened them again, she gave Luke a thumbs up. He nodded, playing the instrumental in her headphones. She nodded softly to it before beginning to rap.

_I guess it's been a long time but don't worry 'bout me, I'm fine_

_But I swear in these years, I crossed a few fine lines_

_I fell out of bad habits and then I fell in love_

_I never meant to catch feelings, never even wore a glove_

_But hey, that's okay because we worked through it_

_The worst part is trying to stay alert through it_

_I'd say you you did a damn good job with us_

_All alone, raising two crazy kids on your own_

_Except you didn't, the elder had a hand in it_

_We put our names on this game, see, you can't miss it_

_And I did it in nothing more than your honor_

_I never let it phase me growing up without a father_

_Even as you faded away, you were beautiful_

_Then that unstoppable force met immovable_

_It's crazy but I guess that's just the way it goes_

_Blessed with an angel, this bullet wound say it's so_

Aubrey was already in silent tears as the chorus played, a sample of the words from Lynard Skynard's "Simple Man" beginning with "My mama told me, when I was young". She could make out her sister's misty eyes opposite her behind the glass. She knew how much this song meant to Beca, to Jesse, to her. It was all that had needed to be said, and they could not say it any better. She knew it was taking everything in Beca not to cry as she spoke the words etched on her soul. She was aware that every emotion yielded in the last five and a half years was being poured into the microphone, and it had to be overwhelming. Still, the DJ pulled through strong.

_I know it's still hard to wrap my head around it_

_I just needed closure and I finally think I found it_

_I always felt that guilt up in my gut that made me nauseous_

_I could never fill that void inside although I filled my pockets_

_Money could never buy happiness, some just don't get it_

_I learned that there's no amount that can buy a day pass to Heaven_

_I always ask God why he had to ask for you_

_You promised a year, Mama I was coming back for you_

_I begged for him to take it back, to wake me from this nightmare_

_How did this happen so fast? I mean, you were right there!_

_I never meant to leave you, I hope you believe me_

_Even though it was always possible, it didn't make it easy_

_There was no one to blame, no face to the name_

_No culprit to attack as it tore down your frame_

_Just know, you can rest easy now as hard as it seems_

_We made it, Mama, we followed the dream_

The chorus played once more then the song faded out, and Beca immediately broke into a fit of tears, dropping her face in her hands. Aubrey and Jesse rushed in quickly, pulling their sister into their arms as their tears fell.

"That was beautiful, B," Aubrey croaked. "She's proud. We made it. She's proud."

"Y-yeah," Beca shakily returned. "We made it."

"Together," the three synchronized, arms tightening around each other.

The others in the control room smiled at the sight before them, Stacie and Chloe wiping tears from their eyes. Luke and Cynthia Rose were sporting proud smiles because in all the years they had known Beca Mitchell, reared her, molded her, empowered her, she had never been one to openly pour out her soul to people. Her music had always been so abstract, emotions encrypted beneath metaphors and double entendres that allowed the mind of any individual open interpretation. Her feelings had never been so blatantly displayed like this, but they knew that Beca had never fully coped with losing her mother, with leaving her mother for LA just under a year before Anna passed on. She had always felt guilt and shame although her mother had been the one to push them forth, and she had never given herself closure. There had been the first two years where she had assured herself over and over that her mother was still back in Barden, and she would be healthy and home in LA soon. There was the year after that where the subject was almost taboo, where she refused to speak of the matter or that her mother had ever existed. There were the months following this when she was angry at the world, and she walked around with the devil on her shoulder. In all that time, the little music that she did make was dark, depressing, intangible to any other mind aside from her own. She and the music had reached a stalemate, and the struggle had become rigorous before Beca could properly wrap her head around it. Then she attended that concert. Now, as these last two years passed, she had slowly come to terms with the fact of the matter. She was able to speak about her mother without wanting to bash her own head in. She could think about the woman without the urge to go ballistic. She was healing, and she knew now that it was all that she could do.

Recovery had never been the goal. No, the goal was far beyond that. The goal was progress, to accept her mother's passing but continue to love whole-heartedly regardless of the risk of loss, to continually honor her mother's legacy and carry it forward, to succeed and never settle. She had had yet to do so until meeting Chloe, and it had all come on so fast. Falling in love took a matter of days. Staying in love had been somewhat of a terminal illness. Finding Chloe again was both a gift and a curse, but it was gradually working itself out. What Beca could attest to was the reality of addiction. Chloe had been the drug. One hit and Beca had been strung out, craving her long after the supply was gone, the withdrawals coming in the form of beautiful nightmares and hallucinations of the woman on the street. When another hit was offered, Beca had pounced on it. She had chased it for so long. Maybe no one else would understand why she stayed, why she forgave Chloe over and over, why she continued her addiction after countless overdoses. Even she could not fully make heads or tails of it. No, literal drugs didn't suddenly become good for you, but she was hoping Chloe would be the one to turn the tide. She had been the drug, the key to Beca's triumph as well as Beca's complete annihilation. She had the power to take Beca higher than any other, but she also had the power to take her to the lowest of lows. It was not that Beca trusted her with that power. It was that Beca could not fight off the urge to hand over that power. It was plausible that no one in their right mind would do so. However, the DJ's addiction had not left her in her right mind, or rather, with much mind at all. Still, there was hope that her choice would not completely fail.

They had been slowly working out their issues in the days following Beca's discharge. Chloe had moved out of Tom's apartment, and she was surprisingly living with Aubrey for the time being. Both Beca and Chloe had agreed that it was not yet time to move in together because they needed to sift through all insecurities and concerns beforehand, so Aubrey had offered her spare room. Chloe had agreed, and she had therefore been spending a lot of time with Aubrey, who in turn spent a lot of time with Stacie. Stacie and Chloe had come to a happy medium in that time, and it was good to know that Beca no longer had to choose. Stacie was still her best friend. They were still a family, and happiness had at last been established for all involved. The prospect of Aubrey and Stacie having a much deeper connection than friends was actually not as unsettling as expected. Beca found it to be rather enticing. She only wanted the two of them happy, but she would be having "the talk" with the both of them when came time.

It wasn't easy. The first few conversations discussing their relations between Chloe and Beca had been deeply emotional, usually ending in fits of tears and some raised tones. Anger was shot followed by regret then sadness, but repentance would come in time. For now, they were just testing the water, getting their feet wet and releasing all pent up agony. They didn't sleep together. Beca was serious about taking things slow because if this was real, they had all the time in the world, but she needed to be sure that it was no hoax before jumping back into things especially with Dr. Beale ironically stressing the importance of avoiding stress.

* * *

_"I just don't understand how you're going to handle being with me when the very thought of the spotlight scares the shit out of you!" Beca screeched._

_"Scares the shit out of me!" Chloe growled incredulously, on her feet now with fists clenched. "I am not scared of the spotlight, Beca, but you wanna drag me on some show to, I don't know, immortalize yourself because oh, you came back from the dead and now wanna show the world how perfect your life is. You were the one that had said it wasn't a sure thing-"_

_"Okay, so you don't want it to be? Thank you. That's more clear, thank God. Now I know."_

_"I never said that, Beca, but I left Tom for a reason. I-DON'T-WANNA BE-A-TROPHY!"  
Beca jumped to her feet now. "How dare you compare me to that prick. They wanted all of us there, Chloe, not just you and I. News flash: This isn't the Chloe show! I asked because I thought you were part of this family now. So excuse the fuck out of me! If you wanna go back to-"_

_"Don't fuckin' go there, Beca! If I didn't want to absolutely be here, I wouldn't be, and you know that! So don't play that childish card with me!"_

_"Well, Jesus Christ, Chloe! If I don't show you off, I'm an asshole. If I show you off, I'm Tom fuckin' Edwards. What the fuck do you want from me!"_

_"You know what? Nothing. I don't want anything from you."_

Just as Chloe was picking up her purse to leave, Beca threw her head back in unadulterated laughter. Chloe turned back to give her a quizzical look. The DJ soon doubled over, clutching her sides. When she opened her eyes to see the unimpressed look on Chloe's face though the brunette's tears, she laughed even harder. Chloe growled in frustration before picking up the empty Coke bottle from the coffee table and launching it at the brunette. It bounced off her head, and Beca instantly sobered, raising an eyebrow at Chloe. 

_"What-is so-funny, Beca Mitchell?" she snarled._

_Beca grinned before slumping into the couch. "We're fighting about a fuckin' TV interview," Beca cackled. "One I don't even wanna do. It's so non-domestically domesticated. It's like watching Real World or something. I'm pretty sure I just-well, we-I don't know. By far the most pointless argument I have ever been indicted in."_

_"Yeah, well, you do make for a pretty pathetic debate partner."_

_"Sure, sure. Keep getting those shots in, Red. Trust me though. Your 'I left Tom for a reason' shot never gets old. How many times in the last week is that now? I wasn't aware that announcing to the world that you were my girlfriend was 'degrading you and treating you like a trophy'. I thought it was honesty. I don't have to announce shit for the whole world to strain to listen. It just-whatever."_

Chloe softened now, shoulders dropping in defeat as she tossed her purse onto the couch and sat down. Beca's fingers twitched slightly. After a week without weed, it tended to happen periodically. Chloe glanced over at her.

_"You weren't kidding," she breathed. "This isn't easy at all."_

_"Well, carrying the past with you surely doesn't make it any lighter, you know," Beca sighed._

_"Beca, I'm sorry. I-I just-I'm scared that it's going to be the same I guess."_

_Beca scoffed. "And I'm not scared, Chloe? I've been chasing you like a lost puppy for how long now? I overdosed on you more times than I can count. You have toyed with me, and still, I've yet again given you the benefit of the doubt. The least you can do is see past that screen your putting over it and see who the hell I am. Who I've been for almost three years now. Understand this. You're so scared that I may actually be good for you now that you have a chance to actually be with me. When you had Tom, he protected you from letting yourself love me. Your father protected you from letting yourself love me. They were your excuse not to follow your heart. I didn't have an excuse, and the help that was offered to me was shut down completely. This is coming from me, emotionally retarded Beca Mitchell who could never love anyone. So you tell me who should be scared."_

_They delved into the silence for a long time, neither looking over at the other. It had become common practice. The first few discussions, they had set out to completely obliterate each other, yelling at one another so loudly for so long that Aubrey was afraid they would get nodes (vocal nodules or something, Beca didn't really catch the entire explanation as she had begun to yell again). Aubrey mediated the following argument, and they learned to at least take a few breaks before starting up again. Then Jesse scolded them next, and that was entirely eye-opening because Chloe had never heard the man yell the way he had as if reprimanding two teenagers. After that, they had learned to just dwell in silence and mull over the information exchanged when tempers flared and ran too high. It worked out because after half an hour of idle silence, both stood. They met in the center of the room, Chloe cupping Beca's cheeks and Beca bracketing Chloe's hips. They gave each other a nod as they locked gazes._

_"I hate how much I love you," Beca grumbled._

_"At least we're on the same page," Chloe deadpanned. _

_"I guess the important part is that I love you."_

_"I love you too."_

_"Call me Tom again though, and I'll tell Aubrey to make you sleep on the balcony."_

_"Technically, I didn't call you-"_

_"Shut up, Beale."_

* * *

__

Beca Mitchell never fared well with technicalities. In fact, she didn't deal with them at all. They were minute strokes in a vast picture that were bypassed by all thought on behalf of the brunette. Had she paid any mind to them, she would not be where she was. Being a woman in hip-hop, many expected an exponential amount of sexual content, power engendered by their means of seduction. Beca was a lyricist. Beca had never degraded herself nor any other woman in her music. This had never crossed her mind, and Cynthia Rose had never expected her to do so. It had never been asked of her, and if it had, the pursuer would have been deeply disappointed. It would have never been a simple no because Beca Mitchell and her stance on a matter was not simple. She would have exploded, giving them a piece of her mind and letting them know how disgusted she was with the suggestion. In this day and age, Beca had become a staple in the genre, and no one questioned her. She was a permanent resident of the Billboard Top 100, Top 40, Top ten more often than not. Where hip-hop had become aspirational, artists like Kendrick Lamar and Beca had remained inspirational. They had revived the finesse and grace of the art. They had breathed life back into artists that had given their souls to game and became puppets to the industry. Once upon a time, Beca had been auto-tuned just the same, but now, she was herself again. Had she not recovered, the public would have eventually forgot about her. She would be washed out. However, her family would have been the ones to suffer the loss. Therefore, regardless of the hell Beca had endured to chase after Chloe, her family could not help but forgive her because in the process of tearing her apart, Chloe had always managed to put her back together.

Beca flexed her arm thoughtlessly. She had just removed the sling, and the limb was sore to no surprise. She stretched it out before her, eyes locked on it. She could not raise it as high as per usual, but it felt okay. The headaches had gradually slowed, and now they were few and far between but no more than a dull ache in her temple. Jesse watched carefully as she marveled over her arm. When she felt the muscles ease, she picked up her glass of scotch and took a sip.

"If I would have died, you would've taken me back to Barden, yeah?" she mused, eyes skyward.

"Yeah, B," he replied, his own eyes staring down at his glass. "With Mom."

"Where do you think they buried Warren?"

"They didn't. I gave him the okay to cremate him."

Her eyes snapped over to him now. "What?"

"Well, we're still his only family. I gave them the okay to cremate him. You were still in the hospital."

"Then-what did you do with his ashes?"

He shrugged. "Threw him in the ocean."

They locked eyes for all of four seconds before they both grinned and shared a chuckle.

"I'm proud of you, J," Beca said in low voice.

"For throwing him in the ocean?" he questioned, confusion etched in his features.

"No." She met his eyes once more, locking gazes as she set down her glass and leaned forward. "I'm proud of you. For the man you came to be, and I know I don't tell you enough, but I _am_ proud. I love you, Jesse, and I never would've made it this far without you. You always had my back even when I made stupid and reckless decisions. I never should've dragged you into selling that stuff or smoking it or any of that, but never did you complain or question me on anything. You never judged me or looked down on me. You kept my secrets. Even when you could read me, you would never read me aloud unless I permitted you to. You're a soldier, and for that, I know that Mom would be proud, and Dad would be jealous because he could never be a fraction of the man you are. For that, I look up to you. You're _my _hero."

Jesse's throat was dry, a lump obstructing it. He had to restrain tears. His sister had never been one to give such heartfelt speeches. Usually, they just allowed themselves to lounge in their emotions when both could feel them. They would read each other, interpret it however deemed fit, but they never had to say much. To hear his twin sister, his best friend, his idol and savior, of her own accord say that she was proud of him was something Jesse had not realized he had been waiting to hear all of his life. That one speech alone had warmed his heart and given him complete and utter happiness. It was like the missing piece to the puzzle, a piece he had not even noticed that he needed. He smiled warmly at her, eyes illuminated. She returned it.

"That means more than you'll ever know, B," he breathed. "Thank you. I'm proud of you too."

"I know," she replied with a nod. "I just know that you needed to hear it. It's scary to think we can leave this world with so much unsaid to those we love, so-I'm saying it."

"Thank you."

"But you know that you're always going to be my baby brother, and I'm always going to love you more than life itself. I will do anything for you, and I'll always be there because, well, you're my other half. We're stuck together whether you're here or I'm there."

"Then I'm sure we're gonna be okay."

"We will be."

"Beca, I just want you to know why I look up to you. I know a lot of people just expected it and didn't understand how little, innocent and sensitive me could look up to a badass like you and still be this way. It wasn't just because you were my sister though. It was because I knew the real you. You were a hard-ass with a devil-may-care attitude, a rebel, but at home with Mom and I, you had the biggest heart. When the football team ganged up on me, you were there to punch Gabriel Manning in the face without reservation. When Jenna broke me, you were there for revenge. To others, it was reckless and ruthless and manic, but to me, it was a sign. It was the principle of it. It symbolized how much you cared about me. Your actions spoke louder than your words ever could, and I knew that even when you could never say it out loud, you loved me. You loved us, your family, and though Aubrey was the one working all of the time, you were the one that carried this family. You let Aubrey loosen up bringing her into the music world instead of letting her end up an uptight lawyer or something. You gave me the courage to follow my dreams. You've been beside me encouraging me without really knowing it, and that's the greatest thing, B. You proved how much you loved us without trying to, forcing it. You always proved it. I didn't have a dad. I barely had a mom, but I had my twin sister, and that was more than enough because I knew, I-_know _that I'll never have to handle anything alone, and neither will you. Behind that badass external coating is a big heart, and to be loved by you was always the best blessing I'd ever been given."

Beca did not notice the tears falling down her face until the salty liquid dripped down onto her lip. To hear someone think so highly of her was not uncommon as a celebrity. To know that her brother thought so highly of her was no secret, but to hear him justify it anyway? Any ice left around that heart of hers was melted away. She smiled genuinely at him before they stood at once and embraced one another. It was a bone-crushing grip that neither minded at all, their noses nuzzled into one another's necks as Beca gripped a handful of the small curls at the back of Jesse's head.

"I love you, J," she choked out.

"I love you too, B," He crooned.

When they parted, they noticed that another presence had stepped out onto the terrace. Jesse smiled over at Chloe before wiping his sister's tears away with the pads of his thumbs. She kissed his forehead, an act that had never occurred before, and he donned his bright, boyish grin. She patted his arm with a soft chuckle before he left the two women on the terrace alone. Beca settled back into the armchair she had previously occupied, and Chloe claimed Jesse's seat opposite her. Beca poured her a glass of wine that was chilling in a bucket beside the scotch, and she gave her a thankful smile. They sat in silence for awhile, looking out over the night sky. At last, Chloe broke the silence in a soft voice as if afraid to disturb the tranquility.

"So, I signed up for classes today."

Beca looked over at her. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"To be a teacher."

"Yes, a teacher. I'll turn my minor to a major, and I can teach elementary school."

Beca smiled softly now. "I'm proud of you."

"Thank you." They each took a sip of their glasses. "Beca?"

"Hmm?"

"Are these fights going to be common practice now?"

Beca froze a moment, replaying the prior night's argument in her head. It had been quite spontaneous, spawning from stress on the perfection of a particular track due to be the first single off of the new album. Somehow, it had become an issue between the two.

* * *

_"I love you, Beca. I-"_

_"You know, you've been saying that for two years, Chloe! It's just words now!"_

_"I broke up with Tom! I gave him back the ring. I told my dad. I-"_

_"Yeah, and you waited until I was almost dead! What if I hadn't made it through the surgery! What then? How would you feel?"_

_"I know that I would've felt like shit, Beca, but-"_

_"Then you could've married Tom and settled for the rest of your life, and what the hell does that say about me? I fell for the girl that can't stand up for what she believes in!"_

_"Must you be so insulting all of the time! Is this what you want! You wanna argue with me for the rest of your life, so be it. I'll be here. I'll be your punching bag. I agree I deserve it. I played with you. I messed up time and time again. I hurt you, and I feel like shit for it, but I'll do my time. I'll pay my dues. Whatever that may be because regardless of what I've done or said, I'm in love with you, and nothing can change that. What you need to know is that you chose to stay too!"_

_Beca chuckled bitterly. "You know what the fucked up part is? It's that you _know _that I'm in love with you. You know the power you have over me, and you abused it."_

_"I know I made the fuckin' mistake, Beca! What the hell do you want me to say? What can I say to that! How do I even respond to that?"_

_"I guess-you don't. I don't know."_

_"You just-isn't it too late for you to make your feelings so fuckin' cryptic? You're here. We're in love. You proved it. I'm still getting there. Is this a competition though, really? Are you going to keep jabbing at me until you even the score?"_

_"That's not what I'm doing. I-I don't know what I'm doing." She slumped back on the couch. "I do love you, but-I've never been good with emotions. Then you come along and spark every emotion known to man in me, and they're completely mutated and ten times their normal strength, and they're just-spilling out all at once. I'm-I'm drowning in this shit."_

_Chloe sighed now, her voice softening. "Beca, I know you're insecure. I understand that. I take full responsibility, but I'm doing my best to help you work through this, you know. You said it yourself. It won't be easy. It's gonna take longer than a month, but I have faith in us because of the love we have. It always led us back to each other. If-if you would've died on that operating table, I would've died with you. I know how selfish it seemed. My superhero was gone. I didn't know what I expected of you. There was a possibility I would've just hoped and prayed you would show up at the wedding and stop it." Beca snorted. "I don't know what would've happened, but what did happen is all I care about because I can't change any of it. I wouldn't."_

_"You're right. We can't. I don't want to. I just-wanna wake up one morning and not worry about the decisions I made. I want to let myself be happy. You're no longer the issue. It's the one in the mirror I have to answer to now, and I'm not ready to count my chickens just yet even if they've already hatched."_

_"Well, when you're ready, I'll double check the count."_

* * *

"No I don't suppose so," Beca sighed at last, taking another drink of scotch.

"Then-"

"Look, Chloe, I'm insecure. I was stressed yesterday, and I don't know why I snapped at you when you said you loved me. I want to believe you, but whether you're telling the truth or not, it's about my ability to handle that truth. I haven't acquired that ability yet, but I want to. I really do. I want to because I love you, and I don't plan on walking away from you. If I had, it would've been a long time ago. Years ago, but I never could, even when you walked away from me. I never believed in fate or soul mates or true love or any of that. I'm not sure I do now, but what I do know is that there's something between us far beyond lust and crushes and regular love. It's deeper than that. I mean, come on. I couldn't forget your face for two years after only spending three days with you. You took my heart from the start, made a home inside of it, and ugh, it sounds so cheesy, but I'll never know how else to explain it."

"I love you, Beca. That's all I can say. I'm going to show you as we go. There are no other words that I can use to describe it, but I do. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

"I love you too."

After leaving Beca's house, making up with tender kisses and promises left to be kept, Chloe returned to her shared apartment with Aubrey. The blonde was sitting in the living room looking over a folder, her legs folded beneath her and a cup of tea on the coffee table before her. She looked up when Chloe walked in, and the redhead smiled. Aubrey closed the folder slowly, beckoning Chloe over. She sat down beside the blonde carefully, looking over at her.

"How is she?" Aubrey asked as always, removing the spectacles from her face.

"Since you saw her this morning?" Chloe asked playfully, and the blonde scowled at her as she giggled. "She's good. She took the sling off, and she feels fine."

"That's good." She sipped her tea now.

"Bree?"

"Yes, Chloe?"

"Thank you for all of this."

Aubrey sighed, leaning back to look at Chloe. "I could say it's for my sister, but it's mostly for me to keep an eye on you." The two shared a knowing smile before Aubrey turned serious once more. "Chloe, I'm sure that you could be good for Beca one day. That's hard for me to say. It was unbearable to see her be torn apart in such a way because it had never happened before. Never had she allowed anyone to hit her so deep, but it's so much bigger than that. I wanted-my sister to be able to open her heart, to love someone and to be loved. Now, of course, you didn't show much promise to start with, but as it progressed, I saw it in you. Trust that I had to dig for it, but-I nor anyone else can deny that you were the one to bring her to life, to prove that she was human, and for that, you intrigued me. For that, I could believe that you would eventually come to terms with it yourself and make it right. Had I not been sure that you truly loved her despite your constant missteps, I would not have accepted you even now."

"Thank you."

"No, thank you. Just don't make me regret it. Don't prove me wrong."

"I won't."

"I know that my sister's a handful, but she has the biggest heart even if she doesn't readily demonstrate that trait."

"I know that she does, and I know that it won't be easy gaining her trust again, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I love her too much not to."

"I believe you."

"And don't sell yourself short either, Bree. You're pretty amazing yourself. Behind that wound up, tight-lipped thing you got going on, you're pretty cool."

At that, Aubrey cracked a smile. "Thanks. I'll take it as a compliment."

"You should."

The impromptu relationships induced in the summer heat of Indio, California during the Coachella Music Festival were not perfect. They were deeply flawed, cracked, bent out of shape. Nevertheless, they were cherished by those who now held them. There had naturally been the option to walk away multiple times. They could have, maybe should have left the pieces on the floor and moved forward after these relations had first been shattered. Their minds had insisted. However, their hearts had gained the upper hand, a relentless pull that would not allow them to so easily abandon ship as it threatened to sink to the depths of wallowing destruction. Novacane had been a simple drug, one that had revamped a notorious DJ when it was believed that her prevalence had run its course. When it was further studied, it was found that the drug had not been the savior in the end. It was the woman who had been uninhibited enough to offer the drug to said DJ. In that time, this woman became the drug. She had been good for her and bad for her. She had raised her up and tore her down. She had healed her, and she had infected her. It was believed to be a fatal attraction at first, but it was soon realized that it was so much more than that. It were as if gravity held them together, drew them to one another, refused to free them from the ties that bound them to one another. It was a love that could not be readily understood but yet could not ultimately be broken. In the act of it, a family enlarged itself. Love made its presence known in the most unlikeliest of souls. Beca Mitchell had succumbed to it, and she had faith that one day, she would be just fine with that. It would never be easy, but neither was rehabilitation from any addiction. Recovery was never easy, but remember. Recovery is not the goal. Progress is.


	17. Wherever The Road May Lead

[EPILOGUE]

"And the Grammy for Album of the Year goes to..." Adele began, opening up the envelope in her hand. "Songs for Chloe by DJ Titanium B! That makes her eleventh win of the night!"

The crowd cheered as Beca stood with a large grin on her face. Chloe followed beside her slowly, a protective hand over her swelling belly as she hugged the brunette and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss. Aubrey and Jesse hugged her followed by Stacie, Luke and Cynthia Rose. She gently picked up the little brunette boy, Evan, who was sitting in Ashley's lap as he reached for her. He would unfortunately not break his hold on her neck, so she acquiesced to taking him with her at last. Jesse smirked and shook his head, but Evan only giggled, waving at the man. A round of awww's were heard as the DJ trumped onto the stage, taking the award from Adele and kissing the singer's cheek softly.

"I got smart over the years," she chuckled as she stood in front of the podium. "I always memorize several speeches just in case. I come up here and hope I can find something witty to say, but it never really works out like that. I'm not as cool as I thought."

"You cool, Mama!" Evan squealed into the microphone, and the crowd went crazy.

Beca chuckled. "Thanks, Son. You see, this is what it's all about for me. This little guy, my unborn daughter and my wife. 'Songs for Chloe' is obviously named for my wife. You know, the smoking hot, pregnant redhead in the back row." Everyone chuckled as Beca pointed. "Yeah, well. You can thank her because she started all of this. When she found me, I was a struggling artist who had no idea where my head was. I hadn't been on stage in a long time. I hadn't made music worth the charts, and I was honestly ready to just stop. Only twenty-two, and I was sure that it was all over, you know. Then, by some miracle, she shows up with her bright and bubbly attitude and her CGI cartoon eyes and that killer body, and-wow. She brought me back to life. She saved me from screwing up Frank and Jay-Z's Coachella sets too, so thank her for that, boys." Everyone laughed. "She made this all possible, so this award is just as much yours as it is mine, Baby. Thank you. Thank you to my entire team for helping me on the project. Thank you to my brother and sister as always for being beside me. I know I drove my sister crazy trying to put out this album while her and her angel were planning their wedding. Between me whining and Stacie's pregnant hormones, I know she wanted to just disappear, but she didn't, so thank you, Bree." Another round of laughter. "I of course dedicate all of this to my mother, Annabella Marie Swanson, as always. She's still watching over us. She's still giving us strength at our weakest points and guiding us through the hardest of times. I know that she's looking down right now and thinking 'damn, after four years, you would think my kid could come up with something original'." More laughs.

"Mama! Bad word! I tell Mommy! Mommy!"

The audience was howling with laughter as the host, Jamie Foxx, went over and handed the microphone to Chloe.

"Don't worry, Son," she said. "Mama's going to time out when we get home."

"Ha!" Evan cheered to Beca, who dropped her head with a grin, her son then giving her a smug look. "Uh-oh, you trouble, Mama."

"I thought we were on the same team, son," Beca stage whispered. "You're supposed to be my little man, remember?"

Suddenly Evan's big blue eyes bulged as he clapped a hand over his mouth. He then slowly removed it.

"Mama, I-I not 'posed tell. Hu-wee! Hide!"

The crowd was in hysterics by now as Beca ruffled the two-year-old's hair lovingly.

"Okay, okay," she chuckled. "We're going to go hide from the wrath of my wife now, but once again, thank you to everyone who has been here for us since the beginning. To all of my fans, thank you for never giving up on me or trading me in. I love you all! Good night!"

Evan kissed his mother's cheek before they headed backstage where Frank was laughing hard.

"Uncle Fwank!" Evan cheered, hopping into the man's open arms.

"Hey, little man," Frank replied with a smile. "You got Mama in trouble, huh?"

Evan slapped his hand over his uncle's mouth swiftly. "Shhh, no tell Mommy."

"Secret's safe with me, kid."

The after party at the club was in full swing by the time Beca and Chloe arrived with Aubrey and Stacie. They had dropped off Evan at their home with Ellie. Aubrey and Stacie's daughter Anna and Jesse and Ashley's daughter Tatum were already there. With Anna only being four months and Tatum being nine months, they found that it was best not to take them to their first Grammy ceremony just yet. Beca and Chloe would not stay long anyway with Chloe's feet usually getting swollen rather quickly at any given time. She had three months left before they would welcome their daughter, who they would name Bella after Beca's mother since Aubrey had already used 'Anna'. To say that Beca was thrilled would be an understatement. She had never foreseen all of this. It had taken Chloe and Beca a year after Warren's death to finally settle in with one another, Chloe moving into the house and the two working through all the issues that had piled up since they had first met. Now however, they were doing well. Chloe was a teacher now. She had begun at a local elementary school shortly after giving birth to Evan, and she loved every moment of it. The thought of having another kid had been solid from the start, shortly after Evan, and it surprised Beca that she was actually hoping for two more. Aubrey and Jesse were certainly surprised, but they saw the glee that little Evan brought to their sister, and she was an amazing mother. Throughout the national and international tours, the dozens of projects, the countless studio sessions, the interviews, the movies she had acted in and everything else in her career, she always made time for her son. It was a warming sight each time they interacted, and they were glad that Beca had finally found a new drug that had made her life better instead of worse. She was addicted to the affection of her son, and that was worth it all.

After two hours of mingling and several drinks, it was the DJ that excused herself, bidding everyone good night before leading Chloe out of the club. They slid into their vehicle and headed home, Aubrey, Jesse, Stacie and Ashley following them out. When they arrived home, the children were already sleeping. They thanked Ellie before she retired to the guest room for the night. Beca and Chloe too resigned to their bedroom. The brunette helped her wife out of her elegant navy blue dress before Chloe untied the navy blue bow tie around Beca's neck, the DJ sliding off her sport coat.

"Wow," Chloe sighed. "Eleven Grammy's. You're a record holder now, Babe."

"Took long enough," Beca huffed, and Chloe swatted her arm playfully.

"Be thankful, Mrs. Beale."

"Oh, I am, Mrs. Mitchell. No doubt about that."

"So what's next for us?"

"Well, Jesse's wedding's next month, Aubrey's is the month after and Bella will be here the month after that."

"I meant as in projects."

"Oh, no. Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"No, well, we have to finish up Drake's album, but after that, I'm taking a vacation. I wanna be home for Bella's birth. I mean I barely made it in time for Evan's."

"You were there though, Babe."

"Yeah, two hours into your labor."

Chloe giggled. "He made sure to wait for you."

"Yeah, but had I not been in San Diego, I wouldn't have cut it so close. Plus, I have the habit of shutting my phone off when I'm in the studio. If Stacie hadn't called Aubrey, I would've missed it, and I never would've forgiven myself."

"Yeah, that's true. Aubrey did make a two-hour trip into a one-hour one."

"Yeah, after a speeding ticket and four near-collisions."

Chloe turned now, taking her wife's face gently in her hands. "The point is that you made it."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world." Beca kneeled before the redhead so that her lips hovered over her swelling tummy. "You hear that, Missy? I'm not gonna miss it. I promise."

Chloe giggled as Beca's lips touched her bare stomach softly. She didn't pull away however. Slowly rising, she dragged her lips up to Chloe's chest then her neck. The moan that escaped the taller woman's mouth was golden in Beca's eyes. Chloe's hormones never failed when it came to the simplest of touches. Sure, they drove Beca crazy more often than not with the ridiculously timed food runs and the sporadic, spontaneous crying fits, but the upside of it all was how easily aroused her wife became. Beca's clothes were on the floor in a matter of minutes, Chloe pressed flush against her as their tongues fought for dominance. Her strength was impeccable as well during pregnancy because she effortlessly tossed Beca back on the bed, not to say that Beca was big, but she usually couldn't even beat the brunette in an arm wrestling match. The hungry look in her eyes as she shut off the lights had Beca aroused in moments, and she crawled on top of the DJ with a predatory smile. Beca ran her finger along the band of Chloe's underwear, teasing the lace as the redhead attacked her neck with her lips. She bit down on her pulse point, eliciting a hiss from the DJ before she soothed the offended skin with her tongue. She slid her hand between Beca's thighs in a swift motion just as Beca flipped them over, now atop her wife. Beca yanked off the final item of clothing, and Chloe grasped her hand when she ran two fingers along wet folds, thrusting Beca's digits inside of her with a moan. Beca was a bit glad that Jesse and Ashley now had their own place. It wasn't far. It was actually still on Beca's estate, but it made it easier for the married couple to deal fully with Chloe's hormones. Sure, Ellie was downstairs, but Beca wasn't too worried about it. They had enough distance between the guest room and the master bedroom to make due for the night. What was clear was that there would be no raincheck tonight as Beca mercilessly thrust into her wife. Chloe's fingers were lost in chocolate locks, pulling and tugging as she bit down on the brunette's shoulder. Her hips moved in tune with each stroke, meeting them each time. Their heavy breathing resonated around the room as Beca's speed ascended with each passing moment. Before she knew it, she felt Chloe's walls tighten around her fingers, the redhead's thighs squeezing around her with as much force as possible. Beca did not stop stroking however, grinding her own hips to a heavy rhythm. At last, she followed Chloe over the edge, arching into her wife before collapsing on top of her. Chloe had to close her eyes as Beca cleaned her fingers with her tongue. Had she not, she would have started up again. She kissed Beca softly on the temple as the DJ slightly slid off of her into a comfortable position for the both of them. Usually, Beca would allow Chloe the top position so as to not risk hurting the baby, but tonight had been such a carnal interaction, she had not thought about it. She still had kept most of her weight hovering over Chloe, so she shook off the thought as the redhead began stroking her hair softly.

"Beca," she called just as the brunette's eyes fluttered shut.

"No, Chlo, you're not hungry," Beca mumbled into the side of Chloe's breast.

Chloe slapped her shoulder. "That wasn't what I intended to say."

"Oh, okay." Beca breathed a sigh of relief. "What's up then?"

"Excuse me?"

"What can I do for you, sweetheart?"

"Much better. I just wanna say that I'm really proud of you for that album."

The redhead could feel her wife's smirk against her skin. "Only because it's named for you."

"No, not true. I mean, that entire album was beautiful. It really spoke about our lives together, and putting the remix to Novacane on there made it perfect."

"You deserve the best, baby."

"Yeah, but once upon a time I didn't, and you still gave it to me."

Beca rose now, propping her head on her elbow to look down at Chloe. She gently cupped the redhead's cheek, stroking it softly as their eyes met.

"Chloe Emily Beale-Mitchell, you always deserved the best. You only _thought _that you didn't, and that's why it took so long to get you to take it. You sold yourself short for too long. I'm just paying you back all that you missed."

Chloe smiled warmly, eyes glossy as she gripped Beca's forearm. "You're the best, you know that, Beca Danielle Beale-Mitchell?"

Beca shrugged with a smile. "Eh, I fare well enough, I suppose."

"You do, and that handsome little boy in the other room would agree too."

"Sure. That's why he called me out and got me in trouble on national television." She looked thoughtful a moment, eyes rolled upward.

"Although, if this is what you call timeout, I'll have to thank the little guy later and give him the green light to tattle tale every chance he gets."

Chloe swatted her shoulder now. "Do not use our son to get you laid. Next time, timeout won't be so enjoyable."

"Ah, you're no fun."

"Really?"

"Really."

"You can't be serious. I am so fun."

"Prove it."

With that, Chloe grinned devilishly and straddled the DJ. "Challenge accepted."

A few hours and several rounds later, Beca was worn out and falling quickly to sleep. Chloe's head now rested on her chest, fingers drawing random patterns along her abs.

"Baby," the redhead whispered.

"Hmm," Beca hummed.

"Can you-rap to me? The one on the album about us."

"They were all about us, Babe."

"Well then surprise me."

Beca was silent a moment, pondering her choice. Chloe was sure she had drifted off to sleep, but then the DJ's voice filled the room.

_It's never easy, trust is hard to earn in this world_

_I thought that love would just be a lesson learned with this girl_

_But it turns out, you can't fight what's been written in your heart_

_I've been through hell to be with her, it's written in the scars_

_Cupid's arrows still embedded in my chest to this day_

_One minute it's impossible for either of us to stay_

_Next minute there's a ring on my finger, baby on the way_

_Lay my hat and this is home, but your arms where my heart lays_

_It's crazy, but you never know what you got to til its gone_

_And you never know what you really need til you find it_

_I swear before I met you, it was still you all along_

_Everytime I look in your eyes, I'm reminded_

_I promise forever but I can't give you a set amount of time_

_So let's just make it last, hit the gas, we'll be just fine_

_There once was nothing more lonely than this heart of mine_

_I was just the Ace of Bass and I never thought to see the signs_

_I was cold with the devil on my shoulder_

_Then you took me on this crazy roller coaster_

_I hated it most of the time, but you wanna hear the punchline_

_I wouldn't trade it for the world, you're my one and only girl_

Beca punctuated the verse with a soft kiss to the top of Chloe's head, and the redhead grinned.

"I love you, Mrs. Beale," she whispered into Beca's skin.

"I love you too, Mrs. Mitchell."

Beca had only meant to drop off some project files to Luke. She ended up sitting in the studio with him and Donald for several hours debating on whether or not Donald should drop a particular song as the next single from the album. The production was done. Beca's work on the project was complete. Luke was handling the mastering of it all, and Cynthia Rose was managing public relations and the direction of the album. However, Donald needed Beca's opinion. She was the grandmaster in terms of the music made at Bella Records. She had been the one to bring in a slew of money by agreeing, against CR's opinion, to record a comedy album with Chloe's best friend, Amy. She had also agreed to do most of the soundtrack on the movie that her and Jesse were cast in someway somehow. She knew what she was doing, where to go with what material, and how to work it in their favor. She had put all seven of the Bella artists currently signed on the charts, high on the charts, and therefore, everyone went to her for her analysis. She was the go-to, and it had built up to that in the past four years. Beca only had to add her opinion for people to listen. It was how she suddenly had a line of Dre Beats, a clothing line, a shoe design and microphones with her name endorsing them among other things. Yeah, it explained how she was on the Forbes' list as well.

The trio had gone through the pros and cons of dropping Donald's club joint with Flo Rida as the next single. Flo Rida was trying to make a comeback, but Donald did not like the idea of being a club artist. His strength was storytelling and charming love songs. His first big single on this album was a love song called "Call My Name". Beca assured him that a club joint would balance him in the mind of the public as everyone loved something they could let loose to. Her phone was in the car because she had not expected to be inside for so long, and she was engrossed with her thoughts on the matter. As Beca turned over the cons once more, they heard yelling down the hall then the door flew open. Jesse stumbled into the room, nearly falling over the table as he panted heavily.

"I-you, we have-You gotta-" he stammered, grabbing the back of his sister's chair before yanking her to her feet. "BELLA!"

Beca gave him a confused look before it dawned on her, and seconds later, she was sprinting out of the room to her car with Luke, Donald and a still winded Jesse in her wake. Luke grabbed CR on the way screaming "Bella", and the CEO understood. Lily scurried after the mob, and they all jumped into a vehicle. Beca berated herself for leaving her phone in the car, and as she pulled out of the parking lot, she heard it beep, alerting her to missed calls. She did not reach for it as she sped down the street towards the hospital. Aubrey was going to strangle her, and if she didn't, Chloe surely would. She came to a screeching halt in a parking space right outside of the entrance, not bothering to lock it as she grabbed her phone and ran inside.

"I-my wife, I-" she panted.

"Beca Mitchell," the receptionist smiled. "Mrs. Mitchell is in 213."

Beca did not wait for the others as she bounded to the stairwell, deciding it would be faster than waiting for the elevator. She nearly slid into a few nurses as she entered the hallway, but they moved out of her way the moment they recognized her with warm smiles. She had to grab the doorframe in order to avoid passing the room, ignoring a fuming Aubrey standing right outside of it beside Stacie. Ellie sat with Evan and Anna beside Ashley, who was rocking Tatum. Beca rushed to her wife's side as doctors and nurses swarmed around them.

"I'm so sorry, honey, I-" the brunette began, but Chloe cut her off immediately.

"Shut-the hell up, and hold-my hand!" Chloe growled through gritted teeth, putting Beca's hand in a death grip to which the DJ had to bite back a yelp.

"Four centimeters!" the doctor at the foot of the bed called.

Beca's mind went blank then, the room blurring around her. She focused on that doctor fully as he barked out orders. His tone softened when addressing Chloe, but Beca did not catch the words. Her hand throbbed, but she paid it no mind. Her eyes were glazed over, body taut. She had been through all of this once before, but it was still the single most enticing and terrifying experience she had ever faced. Her breath hitched as her jaw clenched, awaiting the arrival of their guest of honor. Chloe was screeching at her, but she could not comprehend any of the insults being thrown her way. It all wouldn't matter in a few minutes. It were as if the world had slowed to a stop, the most rigorous and painful round of the waiting game ever played. Her mind reeled with a million different possibilities and outcomes of the coming moments, and tears stung at the corners of her eyes as she processed the fact that this was really happening. It was really time. They would leave the hospital with a larger family, and she was both thrilled and scared of this revelation.

The brunette did not break from her trance until the most joyous sound to ever come in contact with her ears filled the room, the sound of a newborn baby's cry, _her _newborn baby. This summoned tears from the DJ's eyes, her heart swelling with love and adoration. Her eyes were flooded with it as well as she looked over at a breathless Chloe, sweat running down her forehead. Still, she was stunning in Beca's eyes. The brunette grinned widely at her wife who responded with a small and exhausted smile. She leaned down as Chloe released her throbbing hand and kissed the redhead's forehead lovingly. She moved over to cut the umbilical cord before her daughter was taken and cleaned off then wrapped up in a white blanket. Moments later, the little girl was placed in Chloe's waiting arms, and Beca's world changed. It was so different from seeing Evan the first time. She had not loved him any less. The feeling wasn't anymore thrilling. It was on the same level of beauty as the birth of her son, but it was different. Having a daughter, a little girl, was a varied experience. Beca felt the gravitational pull to the girl, the overwhelming need to protect her and look over her more than anything. She wanted to raise her son to be a strong man with morals and inner strength. What she wanted for her daughter was no less, but she also wanted to defend her from any and all obstructions or obstacles. She wanted nothing more than to keep her safe from any and all harm. She was very glad that Bella had a big brother to help with the task.

"Name, Mrs. Mitchell?" the nurse asked her in a sweet voice, lightly touching her arm.

Without taking her eyes off of her daughter, Beca answered softly. "Bella Andrea Beale-Mitchell."

"Beautiful."

"Yes, they are."

Chloe smirked as the nurse walked away quickly. Beca noticed this and quirked an eyebrow.

"What?" she questioned.

"She was totally flirting with you," Chloe replied.

"What? No, she wasn't."

"Fortunately, you were too focused on your daughter-"

"And wife."

"-To notice."

"Ugh, and I thought your overactive hormones were over."

"Oh, they are, so now I won't be as easily-swayed into certain _activities._"

Beca's eyes bulged. "Is that a threat, Mitchell?"

"Yes, Beale, it is."

Beca huffed. "I was totally kidding, you know."

"I'm sure you were." Chloe looked down as Bella's small hands moved. "You wanna hold her?"

Beca nodded dumbly as if she had just been asked to prom by the most popular girl in school. Chloe giggled, gently lifting up their daughter so that Beca could slide her arms beneath the bundle. It was as if the little girl was holding Beca to the ground. The sparkle in Beca's eyes was something that could not go unnoticed. Chloe smiled. Beca was in awe at the little girl.

"I love you, Bella," she whispered softly. "I love you so much. You're my little princess."

After a few moments, Beca moved to the door, opening it and peering out into the waiting room. Everyone occupying it stood, and they gasped when they saw what Beca held. Aubrey was over in seconds, Evan propped on her hip in her arms. They gazed down at the little girl, Mark and Ellie behind them with beaming grins.

"Ooh, a baby!" the toddler squealed, gently touching her head.

"This is your little sister, Evan," Beca informed him."

"She mine!"

The room chuckled. "Yes, buddy, she's yours and mine and Mommy's."

"I like her. She pwetty. She hair like Mommy's!"

"Yeah, that's right, buddy."

The first night that Bella was home was rather calm, much calmer than ever expected in a home with a newborn. Beca could even swear she heard crickets outside or Tatum's cries wafting over the land. Bella had woken up with broken yelps, but her brunette mother had been a light sleeper since Evan's birth, so she heard it nonetheless. She walked into the adjoining nursery from the bedroom and picked up her daughter gently after warming a bottle. They settled into the recliner comfortably, Bella nestling into her mother on instinct. Chloe was awakened by the cries as well, but she did not get out of bed right away when she felt Beca get up. Still, she stood at last and peered around the slightly cracked door.

"Hey, babygirl," Beca softly spoke as Bella attached her lips to the bottle. Chloe would breast feed during the day, but she had pumped milk to get them through the nights. "You are beautiful, you know that? Just like your mommy. You're gonna have that same bright red hair too. You know, that hair was the first thing to ever catch Mama's eye, but that was before I came in contact with those Disney princess eyes. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, even in a Pocahontas costume." Bella whimpered slightly as Beca chuckled at the memory. "Yup, that's right. She was dressed up like an Indian princess, war paint and all, and she was the most beautiful person I'd ever laid eyes on. That was almost seven years ago. Wow, time flies. Now we have you and your brother, and your cousins, and it still amazes me. Sometimes I expect to wake up and it all be a dream. I'm glad it hasn't because I'd be lost without you three." She sighed. "Man, your Mama was a wreck before she met Mommy. She didn't have any clue what to do with herself. Mommy saved her though, and not a moment too soon. We went through a lot to be here, you know, but it made us stronger in the end. I don't think Mama would have been ready to have you or your brother had we not gone through that. It-made me realize how important your Mommy is to me. I understand though." Her voice lowered. "Your Grandpa is a scary man. You know, Mama beat him in chess _one _time, and I was afraid to tell him, so we just played until he figured it out on his own."

Beca heard a giggle, and her head snapped up to see her wife leaning against the doorway.

"I remember that," Chloe sighed. "You guys played for like six hours."

"The man's beard blended in with his face, he was so red, Chlo," Beca whined.

"Yeah, I know. You're a good sport, Babe. Mom did tell him later on though, and he was pretty impressed with your decision."

Beca smiled sheepishly now. "Uh, how much did you hear?"

"Every single word. You'll never get over the Pocahontas costume, will you?"

"Well, come on, Babe. It isn't everyday you fall in love with an redheaded indian princess."

Chloe giggled. "I guess not."

"Well?" Beca's look was expectant now.

"What?"

"Why were you wearing it?"

"I don't know. Amy and I had dressed up as a pilgrim and an indian the year before, and I loved how comfortable it was, so-I wore it."

"Wow, you two are ambitious."

"Indeed. It was a college thing. We were in a sorority, and we had to deliver candy-grams on our assigned holidays. We got Thanksgiving."

"You were in a sorority!" Beca sighed. "I should've guessed."

"Shut up."

"Was it Mama Ellie's old sorority?"

"No comment."

"Yeah, it was."

Beca looked down at Bella now. "I don't care what Mommy says, you are not joining a cult that hazes you and gets you drunk out of your mind around a bunch of frat guys. Disobey this condition, and you will be locked in our basement until you're fifty."

"We don't have a basement."

"Not yet, we don't."

Chloe chuckled. "Put her back to bed and come on, you goof."

"Hey, Jesse and I agreed we would not raise sorority girls."

"What's wrong with sorority girls?" Chloe quirked an eyebrow as Beca lay Bella in her crib.

"The easier question would be what's right with them." Beca scanned her wife now. "They're smoking hot for one, and for two...Nope, I think that's it."

Chloe swatted her arm as they headed back to bed. "You are such a guy."

"Okay then, they're ugly." Chloe smacked her again, and she huffed dramatically. "Right or wrong, I'm always wrong."

"And don't you forget it."

Beca slid into bed beside the redhead, pulling her into her side. Chloe instinctively nuzzled her face into the brunette's neck, an arm slung over her midsection. Beca softly kissed the top of her head as Chloe's digits ran along her side.

"It was beautiful," Chloe breathed.

"What?" Beca asked, stroking red tresses.

"What you said to Bella."

"It was the truth."

"You really loved me, didn't you."

"No, I really _love _you, always and forever."

"I know it wasn't easy."

"Nothing worth acquiring is easy. You can't enhance your strengths without some difficulty."

Chloe grinned. "Such a poet."

"It's just how I feel, love. You know, I expanded my mind in the past few years."

"Yeah, once the weed stopped hindering you."

"I can attest to that. Look, Baby, we went through the storm, but the best joy is that which follows the worst pain. I can confirm that with experience. It wasn't easy, but I wouldn't change anything about it at all."

"Yeah, I know. Neither would I."

"I love you, Chloe, more than anything."

"I love you too, Baby. More than anything."

The years would pass. Days would come and go. Evan and Bella would grow together, soon being joined by little Abigail and the twins, Reid and Aiden. Aubrey and Stacie would also add Paris, Allison, Jacob and Derek while Jesse and Ashley added Carson, Bradley and Spencer. The family would grow with marriages, births, close friends among other things, and no one would ever forget that fateful Coachella weekend. It had generated the relationship of Chloe and Beca which had in turn given way for Stacie and Aubrey to find love with one another. With Beca finding love came Jesse's acceptance of it. He no longer shied away from the commitment of forever with Ashley, and they bound themselves to one another for eternity. Jesse at last was able to accept his movie ending. It solidified a deeper bond that had been concealed for ages beneath the sands of time, waiting for the correct moment to make its presence known. All involved had an addiction at one point whether it be weed or something else. For Beca, it was Chloe and her ability to bring her to life. For Chloe, it was the pride of her father and all others in attendance to witness the facade of the perfect life. For Aubrey, it was blatant control and independence. For Stacie, it was the ability to get whatever she wanted whenever she wanted by any means. For Jesse, it was the need to be just like his sister, to make her proud of him, to hear her utter the words. All had been affected by the experience of feeling as if they needed something to survive, to function, and in the end it was overcome with the ability to live without it. Stacie didn't get what she wanted but what she needed. Aubrey was no longer independent and alone. She was in love. Jesse no longer needed to do things for his sister's sake. He knew she was proud of him. Beca still needed Chloe, but there was so much to the relationship now.

It was in that time when they let go of all reservations and doubts that they found happiness. It was when the addiction became a luxury, and they were able to find happiness in the small pixels of the larger picture. In the end, they had found a drug much more powerful than any other yet one that was not really a drug at all. It was never about the destination but the journey. The ultimate high came from the little things, the small moments spent with their children and family. It had nothing to do with the countless Grammy's, the Billboard Top 100 weekly streak, the multi-million dollar deals, the platinum plaques or any other material accolade. It was that which was intangible yet felt through to their core. It was love. It had always been love that had both struck fear and enchantment into them, and they had finally found the key to it all. The greatest addiction to ever be had was love, and they were okay with that because there was more than enough of it to go around. It had the capability to tear them apart, but they were willing to take that risk because the high was more than worth it, and the expectation of forever was promising.


End file.
